


Dreams of Another Reality

by Limopee



Series: Dreams of Another Reality [1]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Author is a multishipper, Betrayal, Breeding Kink, Canon Compliant, Choking Kink, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Heartbreak, Light Bondage, Lotor Redemption, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Praise Kink, Quintessence, Reader-Insert, Research, Season 8 Rewrite, Sex, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-06
Updated: 2019-05-30
Packaged: 2019-07-07 16:21:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 36
Words: 90,557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15911898
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Limopee/pseuds/Limopee
Summary: "There's a universe inside your head - constellations of the things you left unsaid."The life expectancy of a human is a mere fraction to the 10,000 years Prince Lotor lived. By sheer chance, the universe has chosen you to unravel his mind. What impact could you possibly have on him - or the fate of the universe?[ Canon Compliant ]





	1. 'Fore the Day is Done

**Author's Note:**

> It’s been 84 years, but I decided to start writing again! I’ve never written a full-length fic before and I’m really excited. I’ve had this story planned and developed for 6 months now. It will probably be 30-40 chapters long (maybe an NSFW chapter or two) and it’ll take place over the entire length of the series. Thanks for givin’ it a read and hope you enjoy!
> 
> For future reference...  
> • [[DoAR Playlist](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)] Each chapter will have its own set of songs that'll set the mood.  
> • Chapter titles are based off lyric snippets of the main song inspiration.  
> • My name for MC (main character) is Renly Sanda. Her age is 18-22.  
> • Y/N = Your Name  
> • [♡] in the chapter title means there's a smut scene ~

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • Let Me Out – Hidden Citizens  
> • Who Are you? – Svrcina  
> • Seven Devils – Florence and the Machine

Small instances of pain were but a distant memory – cuts, burns, and bruises were all that you longed for. How you yearned for the pressing pain of a migraine, the agony of an infected wound. Bound and gagged, your freedom was limited only to eye movement but even blinking had inflicted pain. After long hours of gazing into a blinding light, you grew numb to the dry sting in your eyes. 

Of course, the only source of comfort you could find was in your thoughts and memories. The very instant you closed your eyes, you had pictured the smiling faces of family, friends, even colleagues that had spited you. Sometimes, a painful smile would tug at your lips. If you had heeded their insults and envious warnings, you would not be here.

(Y/N) Sanda, you were a former medical student employed at the Galaxy Garrison. Perceptive and compassionate, Commander Samuel Holt had found you more than qualified to observe the wellbeing of his crew on the Kerberos mission. How could you refuse such a life-changing opportunity – especially when you received it through merit? However, the rumors of nepotism were not below your colleagues; you had been more than grateful to Takashi Shirogane for putting and end to such topics.

Shiro.

How long has it been since you’ve been separated from your crew? Days? Weeks? Months? When you had pictured them, they did not wear the happy smiles like everyone else on Earth. No matter what, your mind always returned to them. So much for comfort.

 

* * *

 

_“Please, we come from a peaceful planet! We mean no harm! We come unarmed!”_

_When the sentry knocked Shiro unconscious, you struggled to aid him._

_“Shiro! No, please – let us go! It’s as he said, we mean no harm!”_

_The Galra Commander remained silent for a beat before turning to speak, “You heard Emperor Zarkon. To the main fleet with them.”_

 

* * *

 

_After an excruciating session of interrogation, you found yourself seated beside Commander Holt. You fought back tears as you watched the sentries escort Shiro and Matt out of the room._

_“The older male will be useful in our research facilities,” an old woman’s voice spoke._

_“And the female?”_

_“…Neither here nor there.” The hunched figure approached you. “You’ll only be useful to us as a product.”_

 

* * *

 

_Neither here nor there, huh?_

At the sound of a sliding door, you tensed. Clattering tools and monotone voices were unmistakably the sounds of Galran scientists. Every other hour, performative examinations were conducted to test god knows what. From puzzles to lifting heavy objects, you could never fully understand what they were looking for. Granted, you did not have the luxury to give consent and ask questions. You knew that well after the few attempts at resistance and you continued to feel the repercussions of physical punishment. At least, there had been no tests that required sexual conduct – not yet, anyway.

“We’re beginning preparations for the next test. Another strength test. Be ready to perform at peak capacity,” the scientist informed.  

As he unbound your restraints,your eyes lolled around the room. Besides the research equipment and examination table, the room was largely empty. A section of the room was purposely made empty to allow adequate movement and project holographic screens for physical and mental tests, respectively.   The designated area had large cement wall placed.

“You want me to push it?” you mumbled.

“Break it.”

“And if I say no?”

“You’re fully aware of the consequences. Now, move it!”

You carried herself over the table, stumbling toward the wall.  Your eyes scanned the wall, gauging its hardness and width. You remained expressionless, pulling you arm back to form your hand into a fist. These tasks were redundant, but this was the only way you could unleash your fury.  

A distant explosion erupted, shaking the room. You lowered you hand, watching the scientists react in fright. They scattered and clamored amongst themselves. One of the scientists approached you with an electric rod, his size alone was threatening enough.

“Back to the table, now!”

You cowered then gasped as he suddenly fell before your feet. Above him was an alien woman, grinning at her victim. He struggled for the rod, but her foot moved to suppress his hand. The woman had one long antenna, whipping it to wrap around your arm and torso.

“Found you! Subject Proto,” she sneered.

If there was an opportunity to break free this was it, you thought. By looks alone, this woman didn’t seem to have the ability to challenge your strength.  Forming fists, you harnessed your strength to push the antenna, successfully weakening its grip. When free, you wrapped your hands around it, throwing the woman to the other side of the room.

“EZOR!”

A larger woman stomped toward you – a Galran. Her beastly hands made their way to restrain you. Pure adrenaline compelled you to counter her brute strength. Much to both of your surprise, you had been able to forcibly grip the meat of her palms.  There was no time to waste – maximizing your strength was the only way to escape her. Your right foot moved forward as you turned your body to throw the woman to ground. The impact cracked both the ground and woman’s ego, giving you the window of opportunity to exit the room.

How you managed to find strength to fight and run was beyond you – the potential of freedom was enough to override the ache in your muscles and open wounds. You ran through the pain from corridor to corridor. It wasn’t long before you were caught and thrown under a net. You angrily looked over your shoulder, seeing that it was another alien woman who had thrown it.

“Enough, you will cooperate,” she ordered.

The net had been weighted by heavy materials, effectively trapping your movements under metal threads. You refused to let them win, not when you were so close. The toll of your injuries began to catch up to you, apparent by the shallowness of your breath.

“Please,” you begged. “Let me go – I want to see them.”

“Excellent work, Axca.”

As your vision blurred, a new figure stepped toward you. You flinched when you felt a hand place itself on your cheek.

“Fret not, little one.”

The hand had radiated a feeling you’ve not felt in so long – warmth. If not that, then his voice was enough to lull you into a deep sleep.

 

* * *

 

_"Your blood pressure’s high,” you sighed. “But we’ve already established you’re…fit as a fiddle. Mostly.”_

_You eyed Shiro, withdrawing the cuff from his arm._

_“I know what this means to you, Shiro. But if you could just—”_

_“What? Give up on the mission? Give up on_ my dream _?”_

_His gaze bore into you, causing you to shift uncomfortably. You heard about his confrontation with the Admiral. You knew this would be his reaction and yet it still surprised you. This disgruntled expression certainly did not fit him._

_“I’ve already heard this speech from—”_

_“From Adam, I know. Of course you did. I didn’t expect you not to.”_

_For as long as you could remember, Shiro and Adam stood together side by side. That is, until Shiro began to take on intergalactic assignments. As their primary physician and friend, you’ve heard both sides to the story. You’ve given your piece of advice every now and then – but your own involvement with the upcoming mission had lessened your visits from Adam. Sooner or later, you began to realize how heavily this began to affect his loved ones._

_“Shiro, this isn’t just your life you’re living. The state you’re in now, if you’ve only got that much left, wouldn’t you want to spend it with your family? Please understand that I’m speaking off record here, as your friend. Think of your mom, think of your dad, think of_ Keith.  _He needs you. Don’t walk away when he needs you the most.”_

 

* * *

 

You half-expected to see Shiro’s face when you woke. Instead, you were greeted by the ceiling. No blinding light, no restraints. The softness of the bed beneath your back felt like a dream. You allowed yourself to close your eyes again, relishing in the ultimate comfort.

“Oh thank god,” you moaned.

They really did save you, your captors. You had the right mind to thank them, but they were nowhere to be found. You felt fresh from cleanliness, and your wounds appeared to be tended to. You looked around, seeing that you were placed in a standard bedroom. Unfortunately, the walls were still painted purple.

You were still with the Galra.

You’ve given up on the mysteries that derived from your enslavement. Aliens, high-end technology, an intergalactic warlord that aimed to imperialize the entire universe…it was far too much for you to take. Perhaps if your crew had been beside you, grasping this experience would be so much easier. Of course, any means to settle your heart and mind were beyond you.

You ran your bandaged hand along the sheets. Like the rest of the room, the satin blankets and pillows were an elegant purple. This shade wasn’t nearly as sickening as the walls of your previous room. Surely, there was something to take from this upgrade in living. You were still too tired to read into recent events. Closing your eyes, you had figured that an explanation was complimentary to your stay.

 


	2. Touch So Foreign

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • Sympathy – Karmina  
> • I Ran – Hidden Citizens  
> • E.T. - WENS
> 
> :^) I've watched the series and read threads to death to get a comprehensive understanding of quintessence. Quick s/o to all y'all who have done the same thing cuz boy inconsistencies make it hard to write.

The turn of the doorknob awoke you from your slumber. You slept so comfortably, how long has it been since you arrived? You quickly rose, clutching the comforter to your chest.

Through the doorway entered a tall man, whose skin matched the color of your sheets and hair as brilliant as starlight. His face was smoother, free of any traces of fur. His gaze pierced into you. You weren’t sure if it was the act or intense color that struck you. Admittedly, he had been the most attractive Galran you had seen. If words couldn’t express your awe and admiration, your dazed expression was enough.

In one hand, he had closed the door behind him. In the other, a tray. The closer he approached, the more you cowered beneath the sheets. He was beautiful, but typical Galran men also had needles and pliers on their trays.  

He took note of your expression, smirked in amusement and continued to make his way toward you. Your breath hitched as you readied your right hand into a fist.

“Stay away—"

“I come in peace,” he stated calmly. “I bring your food as a peace offering. My intentions are pure.”

He wasn’t dressed as a scientist. His armor was much different from the commanders you’ve encountered. The crest of his breastplate was too ambiguous to guess his rank.

“I’m sure you’re more than confused as to what has happened. But before I explain, you need to eat.”

Placing the tray on your lap, you eyed the contents in suspicion. A bowl, plate, and cup were decently filled.  You reached for the spoon, twirling the liquid in the bowl.  Every item laid before you was foreign, but your need for sustenance outweighed your fears of being poisoned or intoxicated. You began to eat, quickening your pace when you sensed the familiar taste of tomato soup. The man smirked, pulling a chair to seat himself beside you.

“It’s no surprise to see you react in this way. To say that the druids and scientists are relentless is an understatement. The universe knows how cruel they are to their test subjects.  I apologize for the atrocities you must have endured.”

You slowed down, biting into your pastry as you watched him.

“If one desires to covet something from someone, then they must nurture, or at least provide collateral to that person, no? What they had learned, what they had extracted from you is a mere fraction of what you hold.”

“A-are we just skipping introductions?” you asked. “I don’t even know who you are, much less what those people were trying to get from me.”

“Right. Forgive me – my name is Prince Lotor. I am…the son of Emperor Zarkon.”

You choked.

“The son,” you repeated, “Of Emperor Zarkon? _The_ Zarkon that put me in that room – the one who separated me from my friends?”

“I regret to say, yes. I am. Again, forgive me. Needless to say, the Galra are barbaric when it comes to other races beside our own. But please believe me when I say I am in no way affiliated to the events that befell you.  Still, I am amazed that alone, you managed to face my generals. Zethrid, especially. Your biostructure and physique are much more…fragile than any other I’ve seen. To know that you survived the Proto Project is—”

“You really like the sound of your own voice, huh?” Prince was right – he spoke as much as one. And as of now, he seemed to know more about you than you did.

“Oh. Right. Yes, please. Go on ahead.”

“I’m (Y/N) Sanda. My crew – we were just exploring one of Pluto’s moons when _your people_ took us captive. Samuel Holt, Matthew Holt, and Takashi Shirogane. Do you know where they are now?”

“I’m afraid not,” he said.

“But if you’re the crown prince, can’t you retrieve them the same way you did for me? And let us go home?”

Lotor’s eyes fell to his hands, closing his eyes.

“I’m afraid that’s not possible. If you remember how we’d taken you, I didn’t exactly walk through the front doors. My entitlements…are not as available to me as you may think.”

“ _You can’t save them_?”

“To be transparent, my lineage is always at odds with me. I’d rather you hear it from me and no one else. I am currently in exile due to senseless reason.  As you may already know, my father is a tyrant. He is not inclined to converse with subjects, even someone as special as yourself.”

“And what makes me so special?” you asked skeptically. “You took me for that reason, what is it?”

Lotor paused again. As far as you knew, you were a lab rat. The Galra couldn’t care less about your existence, much less your practice. Whatever they saw within you, it was beyond you.

“The Galra have been known to infuse quintessence within their life forms. And doing so produces lifelong, permanent, supernatural abilities. Which is exactly what they’ve achieved with your untold strength.”

“They… _what_? W-what’s quintessence?”

“The most powerful energy resource in the universe. For centuries, the Galra have harvested quintessence to fuel their ships and weaponry to expand the empire. Quintessence has proved to be the Galra’s most precious resource. Zarkon has had regular infusions to keep him as the sole ruler for ten thousand years.” 

“Ten thousand years?! Then why would they have the project? Doesn’t his reign prove that infusions work?”

“At the cost of his physical stature and mentality. The druids had been looking for a way to lessen its affects – maintain the individual’s psyche to ensure that they will not overpower the empire.”

Your heart sank to your stomach. You don’t even remember them injecting you with something. Did the Galra use you as a prototype to find the means of producing a super army? Why do that when they held the reigns of almost every planet? Intelligence, strength, agility – they were measuring every single thing you were capable of.  Of course you took notice of your heightened abilities but what good were they if you were doomed to spend of the rest of your life in that room? Through some sadistic miracle, the universe had found a way to make your insignificant life meaningful.

“My spies have confirmed the rumors that a single test subject had managed to survive the procedure. After we had taken you, I personally read through your file. Human, female. You were nearsighted and had a hereditary coronary illness. Post-procedure, any ailments you had been cured. Your intelligence levels had stayed the same but your strength and agility…astounding.”

You remained silent, processing everything. You slowly moved the tray to your bedside table. Pulling your legs to your chest, you lowered your chin to your knees. 

“The means do not justify the ends, I am well aware of that.  But I swear to you, together, we will find a way to maximize your potential so that you may overturn those that have wronged you.”

“ _We_? I just want to go home. Please, Lotor. Let me see my friends, my family.”

Lotor sat in silence as you pleaded and begged. You didn’t know if he’d grant you that ability, but it did not hurt to try. He appeared to be a reasonable man, but the gravity of the importance of your existence did not stick. You could care less about the Galra’s quests for power.

“Lotor, please—”

“The Galra have accomplished something unseen in 10,000 years – through you. By a shrivel of luck you, out of every single test subject, have managed to survive the process. I cannot afford to let the Galra misuse that power. If I return you home, there is the possibility they will find you _and_ your people. We still don’t know what you are capable of and until we do, you cannot not return home.”

You hated how right he was. You couldn’t let that happen to your people. If what he said was true, the Galra would willing let millions of people die just to have another superhuman. God forbid Commander Holt, Matt, and Shiro had been killed for just that.

As your mind ran a mile a minute, Lotor gently placed a hand over yours. You tensed, slowly looking to him.  

His father was a bloodthirsty dictator; how was he so capable of making an expression so soft?

“(Y/N),  I need your help to further unlock the mysteries of quintessence. It must be done in order to put an end to the Galra’s savagery.” 

“…you can’t expect me to give myself so easily to you, especially after what your people did. Even if I were to help you…how do I go about doing that?”

“…It may seem…difficult to do so, but I simply need you to trust me. Trust that you are in safe hands. You won’t be alone. Nothing will be conducted without your consent.”  

You knew Lotor was the type that could sway with sweet words. If what he said was true, it shouldn’t be enough to convince you otherwise. But who were you to determine the fate of the universe? Just a little while ago, you didn’t even know there was life beyond your world. Just one word, Lotor could enslave you, kill you.

You were in no position to deny him.

You looked at his hand, contemplating your next words. How much of your freedom were you bequeathing to him? You decided to test his words and belief in equivalent exchange.

“I’ll help you,” you began. “On a few conditions.”

“Within reason,” he said, raising his eyebrow. “But yes, what do you require?”

“If the opportunity comes, you will save my comrades. I said their names before – Takashi Shirogane, Samuel Holt, and Matthew Holt. I think it goes without saying, but you also must give me the necessary materials in order to live comfortably. I’m also human, so I have my own limitations. Physical, mental, emotional. I’m still pretty shaken, so I may need a few more days to be myself again. If you acknowledge these requests…I’ll help you with your quintessence research.”

“Consider it done. I appreciate your cooperation, (Y/N).  But of course, I must establish my own ‘conditions’ before you exit this room.”

“’Within reason’,” you repeated. “I won’t be a prisoner again.”

“Yes, but because you are my underlying and a subject of the empire, you will address me with the appropriate titles. You are free to roam designated areas and request services from those subservient to you. I trust that you can find everything you need in this room, toiletries and clothing.”

Lotor returned the chair to its desk and made his leave toward the door. Before he exited, he turned to you with a smile.

“Expect visits from my generals. They will inform you of additional protocol. I look forward to seeing you soon, (Y/N).”

 

 

 


	3. Bloom Just For You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • Bloom (Spotify Studios Version) – Troye Sivan  
> • Dark Horse – Madilyn Bailey  
> • Toxic – Yael Naim

_The Galra?_

_Druids?_

_Quintessence?_

_Prince Lotor?_

All so foreign, all so alien.

You replayed your conversation with Lotor in your head over and over. He never said it, but your situation was clear. You were still a servant to the empire. Even so, this was a step above your previous status.

After a few more hours of rest, you carried yourself out of bed. You made your way to the dresser and opened each drawer. Surely, an advanced race capable of intergalactic imperialism wasn’t above underwear. You made you way to the closet and shifted through the hangers. Each item of clothing was the same, a simple tunic and a long skirt. The colors matched Lotor’s armor – accents of black, blues and orange. You changed out of your nightwear to an outfit of your choosing, then moving to the bathroom.

The Galra seemed to perform similar basic hygiene as humans. The items placed on the sink counter were like that of yours on Earth. After you finished brushing your hair out, you heard the door opening again. You shyly poked your head out, eyeing your intruder.

“You’re up, good.”

The voice belonged to one of Lotor’s generals – the one who managed to take you down. You stepped out to stand in front of her, folding your hands in front of you. Out of the other two she was the sternest. There was no reason to defy her.

 “My name is Axca. I am here to inform you on your role and daily agenda under Prince Lotor’s jurisdiction,” she said aloofly. “There’s a device attached to your wrist that should give your access to a visual of your schedule. Please take a look at it.”

“ _Already_?” you asked incredulously. “But uh, okay…”

This was to be your first time using Galra tech. You raised your wrist, pressing a finger against the small screen to activate a holographic one.  

“Over the course of the next few days, please familiarize yourself with this device.  Now, as you can see, there are designated times for sleeping, eating, testing, and personal recreation. A map is also available to let you know what spaces you are free to roam and use.”

The only spaces that you could possibly use were the commissary and gymnasium. The rest were just corridors that led to only your room.

 “In public spaces, you will be put under surveillance and escorted by sentries. All questions and requests can be fielded by all of Lotor’s underlings, myself included. If you require to speak to Prince Lotor directly, you are to speak with myself, Zethrid, and Ezor first.”

So much for freedom, you thought.

“You are not to trespass any restricted areas or assault the crew. Any acts of disobedience or rebellion will have consequences,” she said warningly. “Be prompt to each scheduled activity and come prepared when instructed to do so.  Are we clear?”

“Crystal,” you answered. “Can I ask you something?”

Axca put her hand to her side and nodded.

“You said my ‘role’, what is that exactly?”

“There isn’t a formal title that you hold. You are to be treated as Prince Lotor’s…guest. Under his authority, you are under his protection as well. The other sentries have received their orders on how to treat you. No harm will come to you, (Y/N). Now, any more questions?”

No formal title, huh? Try glorified prisoner.

 

* * *

 

The next three days, you spent exploring the ship. The map made the layout easy to memorize. All public spaces were located on the third, bottom later of the ship. The higher you traveled, the less accessible places became.

The sentries were always never too far behind, but you grew used to their company. In fact, you relished in it. The fear of ambiguity and your anxiety lessened with them by your side. Their faces were hidden behind their helmets, but you could identify them by the sound of their voices. Eylek and Groven attended to your every need and answered _almost_ every question. Most of what you asked regard the culture of the ship. Through them, you learned that the majority consisted of petty officers, not all were robot, though. They exchanged goods and services with GAC. Central Command was where Zarkon resided. Recess was made more frequent under Prince Lotor. However, anything that was remotely related to the Prince’s identity and motives were quickly shut down.

You hadn’t seen the Prince since you woke. His generals eventually made themselves known to you. Your initial meeting was more than unorthodox but, unspoken, you all let bygones be bygones. Zethrid, Ezor, and Axca were blunt and informative, but the culmination of their visits had clarified your duties:  You will arrive to the research facility located on the second floor to perform for twelve vargas, every day. Each time you grimaced, they never failed to deliver the message: ‘ _It is an honor to be Prince Lotor’s guest._ ’

You were seated in the library, attempting to memorize the Galra alphabet. You hadn’t bothered to ask Eylek and Groven to help – their job didn’t require them to tutor you. They answered your questions, that was enough.  

“(Y/N), you are scheduled to return to your room in 24 doboshes,” Groven said.

“I’m just about done copying every letter,” you mumbled. “Since I can’t take the book with me, I have to do what I can. I can take these sheet of paper with me since they are from my room.”

You were zeroed in on perfecting each stroke. There were significantly more letters than the alphabet you knew. If you learned to read Galran, that would quicken your adjustment to living here. You told yourself that when you learned the language, you’d write Zarkon an angry letter. Granted, you had no idea how each were supposed to be even pronounced.

As you finished the 31st letter, you heard rustling metal. You looked over your shoulder to see Eylek and Groven standing straight and tall. You widened your eyes to see the Prince approaching your table.

Lotor curiously looked passed them, walking around to seize the paper from your hands.

“Maximizing your recess to learn the Galran alphabet? I admire your ambition, (Y/N). You have so little resources to do so – did you intend on learning the language on your own?”

You placed your hands on your lap, biting the inside your cheek.

“Well…everyone has to start somewhere, right? Back on my planet, I was a learning to be a doctor. General practitioner. Constant schooling is what I’m used to.”

Lotor hummed to himself, flipping through the pages.

“A doctor? You never mentioned that to me.”

“There was never really a reason to.”

When the Galra had stolen you away, they only seemed to value Commander Holt’s scientific capabilities. It’s not as if there were any humans they needed to heal.

“It must be difficult – having to comprehend the complexity of the biodiversity in the universe.”

“Like I said, I’m always learning.”  

He handed the papers to you, placing his hands behind his back. You placed the stacked papers in front of you, still avoiding his gaze.

“You certainly have the handwriting capability. And potential. If this is what you desire, I can make that happen. I will lift the restrictions in the library to give you access to more books. History, biology, chemistry, sociology - this can all be available to you to expand your understanding of the universe. At your own pace outside of your duties, of course.”

You remained quiet, allowing the silence to grow between you two. What were you supposed to say? These freedoms could be at your disposal if you were truly a free person.

But you weren't.

You were his pet. 

You could feel Lotor’s staring at you, Eylek and Groven as well. Lotor took note of this and sighed, turning to them.

“Thank you for servicing, (Y/N). You are temporarily relieved of your duties for today. I will take it upon myself to escort her back.”

Eylek and Groven looked at each other then back to Lotor, saluting him and marching away.

 “Testing doesn’t happen until tomorrow, right? Why’re you here, your highness?”

“Yes. I wanted to wish the both of us luck. Tomorrow, we will change the course of history. It will be hard work, but now I’m even more convinced that you’re up to the task.”

“Do you mind…elaborating? Your generals gave me the basic rundown, but I want to hear it from _you_.”

The details of what tomorrow held and for what was to come was still a mystery. What was really awaiting you in the research facility? For all you knew, Lotor was buttering you up to stick probes and needles in you.

“I know there is much apprehension still emanating from you. Allow me to relieve all your fears now: I will be putting you through a series of trials to measure how strong you really are. You will lift, push, pull, _fight_. From there, I will see how I can mold your raw strength to amplify your endurance.”

“You’re no different from the druids – you want to turn me into a soldier.”

“As we’ve previously established, (Y/N), _this is mutually beneficial_. When you learn to control your strength, you will be able to match any Galran commanding officer. You will have the power to save your comrades. Once I completely understand what you’re capable of.”

You looked up to glare at him, unafraid of the repercussions of lashing out.

“You’re letting me roam through this ship free. If I’m as strong as you say I am, you’re betting all your chips on me to _not_ wreck everything, kill everyone on board and find my friends on my own?”

The others in the library froze, while the sentries readied and turned their weapons toward you. Lotor’s expression was unchanged. He raised a hand, stepping between you and his subjects. They heeded his dismissal, returning to their position.

 “You were once a healer, and I’m sure that your morality has been perverted by the torture you’ve experienced. You are not one to stoop to their level. You mustn’t betray your compassionate nature. If not yourself, take it from me – _be better than them_.”

Damn it. He was right again. The greatness that lied within you was through healing, not fighting. You knew that since you were five years old. Victory or death was the Galra way. What fulfillment can come from defying the oaths you’ve taken?

But this was space, not Earth.

As he did before, Lotor reached to place his hand on your own. Only this time the tightening pain in your jaw and chest had dissipated. The calming effect of his voice matched his touch.

These past few days, did he purposely send his generals?

His charisma was overwhelming.

His magnetism was intoxicating.

“ _Believe it or not, (Y/N), I am on your side_.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> He's a manipulative son of a bitch, ain't it? OR IS HE. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯


	4. The Heart is Deceiving

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • The Feeling – Justin Bieber/Halsey  
> • Lover. Fighter. – Svrcina  
> • Clarity – Rylie Brown

“You’re limiting yourself, (Y/N). Push further!”

“I can’t!” you cried.   

The harsh winds before you were much too powerful. You planted your feet to the ground and used your arms to shield yourself from incoming lasers. Small drones hurled towards you with the intent to kill. One by one, you managed to grip them into your hands and crush them.

Your goal was to make it to the other side of the room and deactivate the simulation with the push of a button. The sandstorm was made to mimic the uninhabitable environment on planet Dromin, one of Lotor’s research facilities.

“You can disable them, and you will. Focus on using the strength in your legs to push through the storm. Now, go!”

On cue, Lotor released another set of drones. You grit your teeth and flung your arms to catch and break them again.

“Excellent!” he cheered. “Now, the sentinels.”

Before he could act, you ran through the storm. In the distance, you saw the red glow of the sentinels’ eyes. Two in front and two in the back, you counted. They were immense, eight times your size and tons heavier. Large, but slow. You could easily evade them if you continued to run.

As one reached for your leg, you jumped off the ground to land your fist against its shoulder, breaking its arm off completely. Still active, you then clung onto its back to manipulate its controls. You synced your strength with its own and made a makeshift suit. The other three charged, but with your combined strength, you managed to take them down.

Lotor’s laugh echoed through the intercom.

“Amazing! Where did you learn that?”

“Zethrid.” You walked the being to the end of the room, pressing the button and ending the simulation. The room cleared, revealing plain white walls and the window to the control room. “She suggested I use the sentinel’s strength as my own. I think I wanted to see how literal I could take that advice.”

“I knew you could do it,” he beamed.

He pushed himself out of his seat, making his way down to you. His wrist activated a screen, the other pressing various buttons on your suit.

“Overall output of quintessence scirns had reached 69.8%. Much less from the simulation of Solvetis Moon. Not bad, considering how much energy you must have expended to control the sentinel. You must stop holding back, (Y/N). If you pushed a _little harder_ , you could’ve finished this trial within minutes. 75%, at least. You have access to your levels, you know this.”

“I told you, I couldn’t.” You were being honest, you really couldn’t. Although your screen was in sync with Lotor’s, he couldn’t feel what you could. Going above 50% guaranteed that all your skeletal muscles would constrict. Normally, this phenomenon would bring a full-grown man to his knees. But thanks to the quintessence, your pain tolerance was beyond human comprehension. As much as you wanted to see the height of your strength, you needed to proceed with caution.

“We can treat your injuries with—”

“Quintessence, I know.” You removed your helmet, letting your hair fall. The concern on your face was much more apparent. “I already have enough within me, Lotor. The last thing I want is to rely on it like a crutch.”

“I understand. Nevertheless, 80% must be reached by the end of the movement, (Y/N). You’ve made astounding progress so far but remember: we can always move forward. You’re much more capable than you realize.”

“Your majesty.” The two of you looked to the control room, seeing Axca speaking into the microphone. “Excuse my interruption. We’ve approached the Rajex System. We’ll be approaching the destination in fifteen doboshes.”

“Thank you, Axca. I’ll make my way to the launch bay soon. You may begin preparations for the next phase of today’s trials.”

Lotor turned to you, reaching to raise your chin. Your line of sight matched his, quickening the pace of your heart. No matter how many enemies you faced, nothing could make you as languished than his touch.

“Remember my voice until I return.”

 

* * *

 

Five phoebs.

It had been five months since Lotor had taken you under his wing. In the span of that time, you’ve grown in more ways than you thought possible. You were stronger, smarter, faster. Was this what it meant to be Galran? So technologically and biologically advanced, it was no wonder they were the dominant race in the universe. 

 _But you’re not Galran_.

You knew this. Your being itself juxtaposed everyone else on the ship. Even so, you had made a name and place for yourself with your physical and social achievements. As promised, the better you performed, the more rewards you received. All area restrictions of the second and first floor had been lifted, giving you complete access to the library and training decks. Eylek and Groven no longer were your escorts, but friends. You sat with them in the commissary for every meal.  

By the time you reached 50% capacity, the trials became more complex. Instead of heavy objects, you were required to face beings with artificial intelligence. Lotor ordered his generals to personally train you. Inevitably, one-on-one sessions had made them take a liking to you.

But you didn’t have quintessence to thank for your newfound self; it was Lotor who enabled this change.

_Lotor._

How much of a liking did he take to you? Despite his affinity for physical touch, his feelings toward you were unspoken. In general, he was an enigma. But in the short time you’ve spent on his ship, you learned that he was telling the truth about himself. He was the exiled son of Emperor Zarkon. On multiple occasions, the ship had been attacked when encroaching Galran territory. The universe was massive, what could he have possibly done to warrant such a punishment?

He kept his regal composure, nonetheless. He fit every quality a prince should have, and you found yourself yearning for his voice. Soon, his company. Then, his touch. You thrived off his presence more than quintessence itself. Still, you yourself were unsure of your feelings toward him. Was he a friend? A mentor? A savior? No matter how you looked at your relationship one thing was for certain.

You owed your life to him.

“Good work today, (Y/N). Prince Lotor will be pleased to hear that you reached 72% today. At this rate, I think you can achieve 80% in two quintants.” Axca handed you a towel and a bottle, seating herself beside you.

“I think so too,” you panted as you graciously took the items from her hand. “Thanks for overlooking the trials today.”

“No need to thank me, it was my duty.”

“Ah, right. Still, I’m grateful for your guidance. Sometimes Lotor’s a little…too eager.”

“ _Prince_ Lotor,” she corrected. “You wouldn’t be where you are now without his enthusiasm.”

“I know that. Believe me, I do.” You both stood, exiting the facility to your chambers. You no longer required sentries, but Lotor made it a habit to escort you back every day.   “It’s the second movement of the phoeb. I noticed he makes it a habit to go to the Rajex System every other movement. Where does he go?”

“You know that’s classified information, (Y/N). I can’t disclose that to you.”

"Yeah, but it’s not like he has to go to meetings with Zarkon.” 

“ _Emperor_. Prince Lotor is more involved with the welfare of the universe than he let others on to believe. I suggest you and I both continue to do our duties so that we may help Prince Lotor achieve his goal.”

“And that’s?” you trailed off with a grin.

As austere as Axca was, you learned that she _could_ be swayed by childish antics.

“Please move away from me. You know what it is: to bring an end to this war by have a complete understanding of quintessence.”

“I know. The fact you’re so by the book…I just wanted to hear you say it.”

“Please spend less time with Zethrid and Ezor, (Y/N).”

 

* * *

 

The library was your safe space. When you longed to be alone, away from idle conversation, you found yourself here. You could spend _days_ here, and you did. Without Lotor’s company, you sourced your stories from the books.

Your skipped several pages, gnawing on the end of your pen. Your progress in the library was far less prolific than your times in the training deck. You mastered elementary level Galran, or at least, what you considered to be elementary. According to Lotor, the average time for a Galran child to become fluent was five deca-phoebs. Considering that he was more than 10,000 years old, the math wasn’t wrong. You decided to focus on more intriguing topics.

Today, you were invested in Galran biology. The books before you were basic run-downs of their development and organ systems. Like humans, they had 11 organ systems. Out of them all, the most fascinating was their reproductive system. You cautiously looked over your shoulder to see any prying eyes. Your bottom lip became the new victim of your nervous chewing as you read through. The further you read, the wider your eyes became. From the text and visuals, you assumed Galran coitus was rather violent.

“A _knot_? Like a _dog_?”

Someone’s cleared their throat behind you, causing you to whip your head and shut your book.

“L-Lotor! P-Prince Lotor!” you stammered.  

“Am I…interrupting something?”

“N-No! No NO NO NO! I was just – this is,  I was just reading up on…” Lotor raised an eyebrow. “I’m a doctor.”

“Yes, I am aware,” he chuckled. “From what I gather, humans are quite emotionally invested in what others think of them.”

“Isn’t that everyone, though? You’re a prince, you have to keep up appearances.”

“That is true. But when you’ve lived 10,000 deca-phoebs, you formulate your own identity and find confidence within it. There’s more trust in yourself.”

“Ah.” Was that why he urged you to do so for yourself? Oftentimes, your conversations were about your worth. You appreciated his efforts to demean your self-degradation. And the matter of trust, how much of it did he have in others? “Welcome back, by the way. Did you have a good trip?”

“My leave wasn’t for leisure, (Y/N). But yes, it was rather fruitful. I hear from Axca that you’ve reached 80% two quintants after my leave. I’m thrilled to hear it.”

“You sounded pretty desperate for me to reach quota. I was just doing my best.”

“But your injuries – have they been affected?”

“I’m fine, actually. I still went my own pace but I guess I really am getting better at controlling my strength.”

“I’m glad to hear. It would be a shame to have achieved the goal at the cost of your wellbeing. But that reminds me…” Lotor placed a [small vial](https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/I/41La4Jdqx7L.jpg) in your hand. A small, sapphire flower was preserved inside. The encasement was dainty, the entire piece quite beautiful. “This is a healing agent. Its properties aren’t as marvelous as quintessence, but hopefully it’ll lessen the burden of your muscles when you do decide to give it 100%.”

“Lotor this is…it’s beautiful, thank you,” you awed.

“This is a small token of my appreciation. I can’t thank you enough for the progression you’ve made upon my research. By this time next phoeb, I’m sure we’ll accomplish our goal.”

Wait, what was your goal?

You grimaced. Had you really forgotten your ultimate goal – to save your crew? While you lounged with the enemy, they could be suffering the way you did.

“You’re upset.”

“Oh, no. I-I’m fine.”

“Humans are much more expressive of their emotions as well. I discovered this the first day we spoke. What troubles you?”

“Nothing that you don’t already know,” you admitted.

“If you’re distracted, we may not reach 100% as soon as we’d hope. What can I do to help?”

You chewed your bottom lip. It’s still a bit too soon to bring up your crew again. Even if he’d agree to help, Central Command forbade him from exploring the quadrants that held prisoners.

“…would you be open to helping me learn more about the universe? There’s still so much I don’t know and there’s just so much I can learn through books. I can’t think of a better person to teach me than a Prince.”

Lotor’s blinked twice as his ears perked up.

_So he was capable of such quirks…_

“Even for a day, I could probably learn more from you than from this entire library. But if you’re not open to the idea—”

“No, I am. I’m more than willing to share my knowledge and expertise with you. Since we’re ahead of schedule, we can dedicate the entirety of tomorrow to do so.”

“Really? Great! Maybe I can teach you some earth customs. It’d be a bit nice to make things a bit more homey.”

 Lotor gave you a warm smile.

“ _You teach me_ and I teach you? Interesting. I’ll be looking forward to our lessons.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GLOSSARY:  
> • Scirn: Original, unit of measurement for quintessence  
> • Rajex System: Original, star system in the universe  
> • Planet Dromin: Original, planet; one of Lotor's research facilities  
> • Solvetis Moon: Original, moon  
> • Quintant: Unit of time for (approximately) a day  
> • Dobosh: Unit of time for (approximately) a minute  
> • Phoeb: Unit of time for (approximately) a month  
> • Deca-phoeb: Unit of time for (approximately) a year


	5. A Long Way Forward

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • Shelter – Porter Robinson/Madeon  
> • Beautiful Creatures – Illenium/MAX  
> • Feel Good – Gryffin/Illenium/Daya
> 
> Ahhhh thank you so much to those that left kudos! 。･゜･(｡´ﾉω･`)❤ I put a lot of heart into this chapter. All the songs are EDM. GET READY FOR SOME MUTHAFKIN FLUFF!

You and Lotor were sprawled on the ground, books open on every open surface of the floor. Tables nearby were stacked with papers and writing utensils. You wanted to do this the old-fashioned way – referencing as much information as you could from books and documents. Unfortunately, this method didn’t last long. What was written on paper covered less than a tenth of the Galra’s history. With Galra tech, you could have every bit of information you wanted at your disposal.

Lotor guided your hand across the screen before you. In the other hand, you took a bite into a pastry.

“The chain of command is quite simple, really. Those who coveted the most power during the initial times of our reign controls certain part of the galaxy. The Yolengu quadrant is where Quartermaster Janka resides.”

“The guy who oversees the supply routes, right? You met with him briefly on planet Suargoon to restock our food.”

“Very good. I must say, your interest in my society is quite entertaining.”

“It only makes sense that I at least _try_ to learn. What good am I as your underling if all I do is lift around rocks all day?”

“Tell that to the druids. They live to serve the witch.”

“I actually can’t tell if you’re trying to tell a joke.”

“Is human comedy something you’ll teach me next?”

You laughed, scrolling through the map on your own. How you managed to have the prince seated on the ground was beyond you. At first, Axca protested; she insisted that you be taught properly through an informative slideshow. You were surprised that Lotor wanted to follow through with your suggestion. It made your heart full to know he was just excited as you for this exchange.

“Okay, you wanted to know about human hydration. We established that most lifeforms need water to keep their bodily functions regular. But some consumable liquids don’t satisfy thirst. On Earth, we have treats like coffee and soda. Both have a substance called caffeine that gives humans a slight boost of energy.”

“Do humans consume alcohol?”

“ _That’s_ what you’re taking from this?!”

Lotor chuckled. He pulled up a holographic projection of a bottle. “Nunvil’s the universal alcoholic drink for almost every culture. I wonder if it’s consumable for your kind.”

“That depends, is the drinking age 5,000 deca-phoebs?”

“Drinking age?”

“On earth, you have to be a certain age to drink alcohol responsibly.”

“Fascinating!”

 

* * *

 

You lost track of the time you’ve spent on the ground. You covered almost every aspect of earth culture from music, to holidays, animals, and fashion. As you requested, Lotor’s topics were much more refined. You learned about his star-faring roots, Brodar, Vrig the Great, and the rise of Zarkon as a supreme ruler. You finally had context about the origins of quintessence, and how it came to be used the universe’s most precious resource.

“So, do you think Voltron will come back?”

“As of now, it is my father’s goal to retrieve each lion. Even if he is exploiting his empire to do so, the likelihood is slight. If a new generation of Paladins rise, they will become the biggest threat to the empire.”

“So what does that mean for you?”

“…” He curled his lip into a scowl, narrowing his eyes.

Uh-oh.

You had been casual with him throughout the duration of your stay so far. Lotor had never been put off by the familiarity of your actions. Surely, if he had been bothered by your behavior, he would’ve given you lessons on the etiquette of addressing Galran royalty? Or perhaps he was being selective with his stories. It’s not as if you asked to learn about _his_ history.

Your attention was completely fixated on him. When he took notice of your gaze, he broke out of his stupor. He leaned back against the shelves and looked to the ceiling.

“The basis of my father’s tenacity is rooted from fear. Not the fear from his subjects, but the fear that is within him. The possibility of the Paladins’ miraculous return is what drives his cruel resolve.  By pledging themselves to Zarkon, the Galra gain a false sense of security over their preservation of power over the galaxy. But I’ll tell you a secret, (Y/N) – fear is fragile. It is all that the Galra has.”

Lotor looked at you from the side of his eye, then motioned for you to move in closer. You obeyed his silent command, scooting in.

“I have an obligation to the empire. Although, my qualms aren’t exactly parallel to my father’s. If the return of Voltron require me to return, I will do my duties as crown prince _without_ the instillation of fear.” He pushed your bangs away from your face, chuckling when the piece of hair refused to stay in place. When his large hand rested alongside your cheek, you felt your anxieties melt away again.

“Now I’ll ask you a question. You aren’t frightened of me are you, little one?” You shook your head. “As I recall, I don’t think you ever were. A little apprehension but that was to be expected.”

_Little one._

That was the first thing he called you. A term of endearment or a reminder of what you are?

“You were different,” you admitted. “You treated me like a decent person. I was in captivity for so long, I had forgotten what it was like to talk like this.”

“’Like this’?”

“Comfortably.”

“You swore fealty to me faster than I had anticipated.” Lotor’s hand moved to the top of your head, letting it run alongside your face. “I will not deny that the circumstances were unfortunate, but I am glad that I was able to deliver the comfort you asked for.”

Your heart panged when he withdrew his hand. The effect of his touch lingered on your skin for a bit longer, allowing you to finally regain your composure.

You weren’t afraid of Lotor.  At his side, you might have been in more danger than you thought. What punishments awaited if Haggar found out the Proto Project had been taken by the _exiled_ prince? To kill you would be an act of mercy.

Your fate was sealed the moment you signed on to Kerberos mission. You now believed in aliens, quintessence and the higher power that brought you here – _to Lotor_. You were strong, but you’ve become so weak _for him_.

“(Y/N)?” Lotor reached to you with both hands, lifting your face. You would have melted again, but his tone was vexing. “What is it, what’s wrong?”

“I just wanted to thank you for saving me,” you whispered.

“Be honest. You have the luxury,” he said, rubbing his thumb against your cheekbone.

“I’m not ungrateful.”

“But you are unsettled. Something I said has obviously disturbed you. Now, what is it?”

You took his hands into yours, squeezing tightly. It was one thing for him to initiate touch but this was your first time reaching for him. This gave you some form of courage.

“What if they find me? You made me stronger, but I can’t take all of the Galra down by myself.”

“If I were so careless with my seditions, you wouldn’t be here. You’d be at the mercy of the witch. The first time we spoke, I asked you to trust me. I will never do anything to compromise that trust and your safety. You have my word.”

“As a prince?”

“I don’t intend to give it to you as anything less.”

“How about as a friend?”

“A friend?”

Lotor paused, slowly pulling away from you. You were accustomed to his quick wit and sideway glances but the Lotor before you was unfamiliar– wide-eyed and dazed.  This Lotor was cute. You smiled, hugging your knees.

“Lotor?”

“Yes, well…I suppose I had forgotten there is an honor more noble than ‘prince’. (Y/N) Sanda of Earth, I give you my word as a dear friend.”

The sound of nearby footsteps caused the both of you to turn your heads and meet Axca. Lotor stood, offering his hand to help you up.

“My prince, Narti has returned with Commander Trovar. They’re waiting for you on the bridge.”

“Excellent. I’ll be there shortly.”

“It’s past curfew, would you like me to escort (Y/N) back to her chambers?”

“No, there’s no need. I think this meeting will be quite educational for (Y/N).”

 

* * *

 

Aside from those residing on Lotor’s ship, you’ve conversed with very few Galra. The Prince and crew were anomalies in the empire. Your understanding of the empire was disillusioned, no thanks to your captors. From what you’ve learned, Lotor made himself known to the empire when it was necessary, much like his business relations with Quartermaster Janka. Lotor networked and gained much of his resources outside the empire, so why would he have a Galran _Commander_ standing on his bridge?

“Welcome back, Narti. Commander Trovar, glad tidings.”

This was the first time you've met Narti in person. Along Axca, Ezor, and Zethrid, you knew she was one of Lotor's top generals. She was faceless, so you couldn’t determine her expression. Trovar was massive in size and had a face covered in fur.  He had koala-like ears, the left one marred. His pupils were missing, making the yellow glow in his eyes more apparent. They both saluted Lotor, then bowing their heads. The cat on Narti’s soldier remained stoic.

“Prince Lotor, it brings me great pleasure to bring you the good news: the Neyban sector is ready to assist you on planet Qorhl.”

“Excellent. And the leader?”

“He refuses to our terms,” Zethrid said. “We’ve given him five quintants to surrender… _or be crushed_.”

You gripped the sides of your skirt, looking at Lotor in confusion. Be _crushed_? 

Lotor cleared his throat, giving your shoulder a reassuring squeeze. “Allow me to introduce (Y/N) Sanda. She’s assisting me with my research on quintessence.”

“The Proto Project,” Trovar said. “She has all the qualities that the witch described. I’m not surprised that you reaped the prize for yourself, Prince Lotor. When she had retained her sanity, the news spread throughout the empire like wildfire. Many commanding officers wanted to be the first to covet that power for their slave armies.”

The air was thick with apprehension. The cold flow of energy ran through your veins, to which Lotor could feel radiating to his hand.

“I would advise that you refrain from your verbal cruelty on (Y/N), Commander Trovar.”

Trovar let out a boisterous laugh, too loud for your liking. “Forgive me, my prince. She’s so small, I couldn’t resist.”

Lotor released an irritated sigh, returning his hands behind his back. “(Y/N) is small, but she holds a might even greater than yours. (Y/N), this is Commander Trovar. He is one of the few commanders I work alongside with.”

“And part of the even smaller circle of Galrans that our prince trusts. So no worries about me revealing your location to the entire empire,” Trovar said with a bow. “Please forgive me as well, madam. It is an honor to meet you. The witch failed to mention how beautiful you are.”

You cringed, stepping behind Lotor. Trovar was nowhere near charming our courteous as Lotor. As what you expected from a vicious warlord than a prince.

“Hmm! You have this human attached to you like a yupper—”

“Shall we begin briefing, Prince Lotor?” Axca interjected. You silently thanked her as you followed Lotor to his seat.

“Yes, let us begin.”

 

* * *

 

Planet Qorhl was a planet rich with life. The foliage and oceans reminded you much of Earth. Under its fertile exterior lived the Qorhlians, a society that thrived on the land. Their environment was rich, creating a surplus of quintessence.

And Lotor had been assigned to establish a colony there.

You appreciated Ezor’s occasional whispers to clarify the details. Although he was exiled, Lotor was still expected to imperialize sectors outside of the empire. This was to ensure his devotion to the Galra. Commander Trovar was the middleman who worked to deliver orders from Central Command. Alone, Lotor could not possibly complete such a task. Apparently, Trovar was one of the few Galrans who believed more in diplomacy than dictatorship. Naturally, Trovar aimed to reap the benefit of glory with someone who shared the same ideals as him. Trovar had supported Lotor’s endeavors even before his exile.

After the briefing, Lotor had summoned Eylek and Groven to escort you back to your chambers. A day lost, there were many things he needed to catch up on, especially for something as important as this.

“I thought he was above it,” you murmured. “Colonization, I mean.”

“He’s the son of the emperor,” Eylek responded. “You can’t expect the crown prince to _not_ partake in the reaping of quintessence.”

“He’s fooled me so far.” The day was almost perfect. Had you not attended the briefing, you’d still believe Lotor was a gentle man. “So, he’s been doing this for centuries, huh?”

“Yes. But as starkly different than the emperor’s methods, the prince’s have been proven to be quite effective.”

“Speaking of which, how old are you two exactly?”

“9,783 deca-phoebs next movement,” said Groven.

“I’m 7,890 deca-phoebs,” said Eylek.

“ _WHAT_?! Wait, you guys have undergone quintessence longevity infusions—you’re not crazy!”

“Yes, but we haven’t received infusions to heighten our abilities. We’re lowly soldiers. Typically, commanders and members of the royal family are able to receive both types of infusions—longevity and supernatural abilities.”

“Huh…so does that mean Trovar has had both? And Lotor?”

“Yes…”

 “But you needn’t worry about Prince Lotor so much, (Y/N),” Groven said suddenly.

“Huh? What do you mean?” The sentries looked to each other, ceasing their steps and lowering their weapons. “Eylek, Groven! C’mon, what’s going on?”

“This is off record,” Groven spoke. “We’ve seen paramours of Prince Lotor come and go. Age, murder, illness, philosophical differences. Century after century, the Prince’s heart has been hardened. Eylek and I have spent many deca-phoebs guarding these people. But none had the heart to speak to us as you do.”

It would be foolish at this point to deny your feelings for Lotor. This was embarrassing; if your sentries felt the need to share this with you, did his generals think the same way? The entire ship? Lotor? Even so, not once did you consider Lotor to reciprocate your feelings. Groven only confirmed past thoughts you had. 

“We’ve discussed it. Groven and I care for you beyond paper, (Y/N). After this night, we will speak no more of this. We wish to tell you—”

“ _You’re much safer being used by Lotor than to be loved by him_.”  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't put a glossary at the end of this chapter bc I think VLD fans can tell which words are original and canon lolol.


	6. Made to be Broken

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • Human – Christina Perri  
> • Warpath – Hidden Citizens/Tim Halperin  
> • Iris – Kina Grannis

You kept your distance from Lotor.

Time was of the absolute essence. The longer he took, the more Zarkon would doubt his competence. Reaching 100% capacity of your strength could wait. No else one in the empire even knew where the Proto Project was, much less _cared_ for it. Trovar couldn’t stress all this enough.

To put it simply: you hated Trovar. You deemed his input and presence unnecessary. After your conversation with Eylek and Groven, Trovar had only reminded you of how insignificant you were. Lotor insisted that his words were playful jests, but every word he said had some truth to it. Enough was enough. You no longer desired Lotor’s company if Trovar was the one to tail him. You had tasks to fulfill, the last thing you needed was toxicity.

Lotor’s generals were busy readying themselves for the pending battle. So, it was Eylek and Groven who watched over your trials. Lately, you sought refuge from your thoughts through battle than books. The library reminded you too much of Lotor. Here, you could release your pent-up frustration.

You were measured up against a much larger sentinel. Its limbs were retractable, designed to test more of your agility and strength. Your movements were uncharacteristically clumsy. Eylek and Groven’s direction were not much help and neither was your preoccupied mind. Each time you dodged one claw, another constricted around your body. You were becoming increasingly frustrated with your ineptitude, ending the simulation by destroying the sentinel with your bare hands than accomplishing the objective.

“Stop destroying the sentinels!” Groven exclaimed. “We’re going to have inaccurate results if the simulation ends by default!”

“When she does, she reaches 89%. So, it’s not a complete loss.”

“It is,” you panted. You pulled off your helmet to take in the cool air. “The max capacity is only considered if I accomplish the task. Let’s do it again.”

“It’ll be unwise to push yourself, little one.”

“Lotor,” you said, your breath evening out. You leaned to your left, looking behind him.

No Trovar. 

“You about to head out?”

“Yes. I wanted to make sure you had everything you needed to complete your tasks before I take my leave.”

“How long are you going to be gone?”

“I’m not entirely sure. The leader of the Qorhlians isn’t as compliant as I had hoped.”

You heart spoke before your mind could stop you. “Maybe it’s because you’re about to take away their way of life.” You quickly realized your mistake and avoided eye contact.

Lotor sighed deeply, lifting your chin. “Is that what you really think, little one? So quickly you had forgotten your lessons. Was my tutoring for naught? Perhaps your definition of friendship differs from own.”

“Yeah, maybe. You consider Trovar a friend.” What was _wrong_ with you today? Trovar’s toxicity sunk deeper into you than you thought. You wanted to break your coupling softly, not set it afire.

“Where is this insolence coming from?” he asked.

You pushed yourself away from him, your act of defiance fueling your anger. “Friends don’t lie to each other! You said you didn’t want to resort to violence but you’re not giving the Qorhlians much of a choice – you’re landing on their planet with an _army_.”

“Shall I remind you of the conditions we agreed upon? I’ve found your familiarity to be quite charming, but it seems I’ve been too lenient. Apparently, I need to remind you of your place,” Lotor hissed.

Damn it.

This was not how you wanted this to go.

“It appears that the Proto princess isn’t as tamed as I thought.”

Lotor’s glare stayed on you. He grit his teeth, clenching his fist. “I thought I told you I’d meet you at the launch bay, Trovar.”

Trovar approached the both of you, wearing his usual cocky grin. “A thousand apologies, your majesty. I couldn’t help myself. I wanted to bid Lady (Y/N) a personal farewell. If we are to fall on the battlefield, I’d never forgive myself if I passed the opportunity to do so.”

“We are not destined for failure, Trovar. Victory or death.” Lotor hardly lost his composure, but Trovar was really pushing him. “And (Y/N) is not a lady. She’s my servant.”

You scoffed, turning a heel to return to the testing platform. You turned your back to him as you put your helmet back on. Tears threatened to fall from your eyes, you refused to let him know that his words affected you this much.

 _Servant_. Just a few minutes ago, you believed that you meant more than that.  

Trovar’s smirk grew wider.  “(Y/N) is concerned for the welfare of the Qorhlians. A noble concern, for she speaks from perspective. But please understand, (Y/N). Friends believe in one another. He didn’t lie.”

“Your opinion is hardly necessary, Trovar,” Lotor said.

“If you wish to convince her, may I suggest that she join us on our expedition? If she witnesses our diplomacy first-hand, you can put her mind to rest.”

For once, you agreed with Trovar. You weren’t opposed to the idea, at all. The fresh air and change in environment would do you good. But, at the end of the day, all was to be decided by Lotor.

Lotor closed his eyes to think, then returned to his usual pose. “Very well. Trovar – _you_ will take responsibility for (Y/N) for the duration of our mission.”

“What?! You can’t give me to _him_!” you cried.

“I don’t believe you have the authority to object,” Lotor snapped. “I expect you to keep her in one piece, Trovar. I fully intend to deliver a punishment when we return to this ship. We depart in one varga. Prepare yourselves.”

You watched Lotor storm away, silently cursing at his retreating figure. Oh, how you wished you could throw the sentinel at the _both_ of them.

“Shall we?” Trovar said, extending his hand to you.

Did Trovar make the situation between you and Lotor better or worse? It wouldn’t surprise you if he had the intention of the latter. If you were to give him the benefit of the doubt, the gesture was much appreciated.

You swallowed your pride and reluctantly reaching for his hand.

 

* * *

 

How the hell does one pack for an intergalactic battle?

This would be the first time in months since you’ve left Lotor’s ship. Aside from the test suit, all you had were your tunics and long skirts. Thankfully, you had Axca. She provided you with some of her old armor when she was an infantry solider. Why she still had it, you had no idea. You were just grateful that she did.

As Trovar’s new charge, you were beholden to follow his every step. Today was turning out to be absolutely dreadful. First, you had an argument with Lotor, and now Trovar was proving himself to be a decent person. His subordinates were diligent, carrying out every order with vigor. You had no reason to believe they were fearful of him.

The soldiers moved about the launch bay like ants, moving once place to another to be ready for take-off. Even with Trovar taking the lead, you found it hard to navigate. Everyone was significantly taller than you.

“Are you all right, little one?” You gasped at the name, but your heart sank when you saw it was Trovar who loomed over you.

“I think I preferred ‘Lady’,” you said.

“I’d rather not be reprimanded by our prince so close to departure. I’ve had special quarters prepared for you on our ship if we are to stay on the planet for more than a quintant.”

Across the way, you could see Lotor addressing his division. Leadership suited him. He thrived behind books and on the battlefield. He was an exiled prince, but so many looked to him with the gleam of hope in their eyes. After his speech, they cheered and hurried to their ships. When alone, that familiar look of sorrow returned.

That’s where you should be.

By his side – not with this stranger.

“—(Y/N)?”

“Oh! I-I’m sorry?”

“We’ll be boarding soon. Are you ready?”

You took Trovar’s arm, looking over your shoulder to look at him one last time. Your eyes widened to see him staring back, scowling.

You were pretty sure he had intended to intensify the punishment right then and there.

 

* * *

 

The bridge of Trovar’s ship wasn’t as grand, but the activity was just as lively. Trovar took his place at the helm while you sat behind him.

“Are you afraid, Lady (Y/N)?”

“A little. This is my first Galra take-over. It’s not like I have expectations.”

“You’re privileged to be witnessing one that is inclusive to the needs of the inhabitants,” he laughed. “Not exactly the full Galra experience.”

“Shoot first, ask questions later is the Galra way, right? You’re asking questions _then_ shooting.”

“So, you don’t know?”

“There’s a lot I don’t know, apparently. I’m a _servant_.”

“Prince Lotor isn’t full Galra.”

“Wait…what?”

“Prince Lotor isn’t full Galra. He is half. His mother was Altean.”

Lotor never mentioned his mother. You weren’t well-versed with Galran genetics, so you never suspected. This piece of news was more unbelievable than the fact he was the son of Zarkon.

“His generals are half-breeds as well.” Trovar looked at you from the corner of his eye. “Prince Lotor loves his secrets. His lineage is one of his biggest insecurities. Some say that it is his Altean blood that makes him weak.”

“He isn’t weak. He’s proven himself countless times, hasn’t he?”

“That’s all he can do. Zarkon has lost faith in him long ago. Why else does he designate his own son to take rogue planets? In the hopes that he’ll die in battle.”

The blinding light of the Qohrlian sun shone through the screen. You raised your arm to shield your eyes.

“Ah, we’ve arrived. The Ancients have blessed this day. Let’s not hope the Qorhlians decide to wage war—for your sake, Lady (Y/N).”

 

* * *

 

The fleet landed on a desert plain. From the screen, you could see the horde of Qorhlians. They were larger than the sentinels you have faced, at least 10 feet or so. Because of their rocky build, most held no weapons. Like you, they must have relied on brute force alone. However, canons were readied on the front lines.

“Prince Lotor demands that you stay on the ship. My guards will watch after you.” Two soldiers surrounded Trovar, adding additional pieces of armor and weaponry.

“Are you going to fight?”

“No. His majesty and I are going to meet their leader halfway and discuss our terms. You’ll know if the compromise is successful.”

“Yeah, because a militarized Galra fleet and a decked-out commander is a good way to persuade them.”

“Strong, pretty, and funny,” he sneered. “And the Prince still hasn’t publicly claimed you?”

“Trovar!” Lotor’s sudden appearance on the bridge’s screen made your heart jump.

“My prince.”

“If you’ve finished fraternizing, we have a planet to conquer.”

“Of course.” Trovar turned to you, taking your hand and lifting it to his lips. “Wish us well.”

You gushed.

From the screen, you swore you heard a low growl.

 

* * *

 

Lotor and Trovar approached the Qorhlian leader, their armies congregated behind both parties. The ship was too far out of range to pick up on the conversation.

Two vargas had passed and at this point, you truly believed that violence was Lotor’s last resort. Why else would the conversation last _this_ long. However, the Qorhlians grew to be more and more impatient. When Trovar’s crew zoomed in on their movement, you could see them marching in place and readying the canons.

“That’s not a good sign, is it?” you asked.

“It is not uncommon for the inhabitants to instigate war. They’d rather fight than be subjugated by the Galra,” said one of the guards.

 _I know the feeling_ , you thought bitterly.

Without warning, a boulder had been thrown atop a fighter ship. The Qorhlians began firing more boulders, their people running to fight.

“The Qorhlians have declined to negotiate further!” Trovar shouted through the intercom. “You know your duties! _Attack_!”

“Vrepit sa!” The crew saluted.

You rushed to one of the available screens, activating live cameras.

Lotor! _Where was Lotor?_

The battlefield was massive, how could you possibly pinpoint where he was? You frantically scanned through the sea of warriors, hoping to see a flash of his colors. Unavoidably, you witnessed both sides fall to each other’s weapons. Torn limbs and the drawing of blood – of course you gagged. This was your first exposure to war. You lived your whole life to prevent injury. Your eyes darted across the screen. You grew more fearful at the possibility of losing him.

_Prince Lotor isn’t full Galra._

Please…

Please…

Please…!

Finally, you happened upon the largest of the Qorhlians. Of course! Leader against leader. Lotor seemed to hold himself well, quickly evading the Qorhlian’s thunderous fists – just as you did with the sentries. However, you noticed a lag on his left leg. Lotor had been hurt. That was why all he could do was dodge.

_Some say that it is his Altean blood that makes him weak._

Why wasn’t anyone helping him? Where was Trovar? Zethrid, Ezor, Narti, Axca?!

Lotor fell to his knees, barely managing to escape a downwards attack by rolling another direction, giving an opening to the Qorhlian to step on his injured leg.

_Why else does he designate his own son to take rogue planets? In the hopes that he’ll die in battle._

When Lotor cried out, all you could see was red. You pushed passed the guards to the flight deck, pushing and punching through any obstacle in your path. You didn’t care how loud Trovar’s orders echoed into your ear, how much damage you caused, or how badly your knuckles bled.

All that flashed in your mind was him.

Activating the quintessence in your legs, you threw yourself thousands of feet apart and hurled yourself through the fight. The battle carried on, few onlookers stopping to gawk at the sudden intrusion. You finally caught the leader in your line of sight. He lifted his club over his shoulder, having the intention of clobbering Lotor to death. You clenched your jaw in utter rage, raising your fist with enough force to drive it through the Qorhlian’s shoulder.

“(Y/N)…?!” Lotor shouted.

You fell to the ground with him, your arm still dislodged into his socket. He bellowed in pain and attempted to grab you with his other hand. Your jammed your left foot into his other socket, finally disabling him. With one final cry of pain, the leader lost consciousness.

Every being on the field witnessed the fall of the Qorhlian leader. At your hand.

“Their leader has fallen!” Axca cried out. “The Galra have won this fight!”

“VREPIT SA!” The Galrans cheered, finshing the last of their bout to round the defeated.

When you came to your senses, you looked back to Lotor and dived toward him. “Lotor!” You knelt beside him, pushing your hair back to properly examine his injury. Your breath was still uneven, but you could still nurse what you could with what you held in your utility belt. “Don’t move. The muscles in the lower part of your leg look completely torn…Nothing looks broken, so we don't need a splint. Here, you can move your hands, right? Apply pressure to your leg to stop the bleeding while I make a tourniquet.”

Lotor gaped at you in disbelief as you continued to ramble. He dropped the cloth and reached to grab your wrist. “You saved me.” You refused to look at him, adamantly staring into the ground when he shook you. “(Y/N), look at me.”

You turned to him with wide eyes, tears flowing. You had been so preoccupied with his injury, you hadn’t even noticed how stricken you’ve become. “I’m sorry,” you breathed out. “I didn’t listen.”

“Oh, darling,” he cooed. He ran his hand alongside your face. Why did it feel like years since he last touched you like this? You laughed through your tears and then nuzzled into his touch.

Lotor leaned forward, pressing his forehead against yours.

He was alive.

He was safe.

Here was here, right in front of you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all thought they were gonna kiss? In front of thousands of other people? Naaaaaaaaaaah ;)


	7. No Smoke Without Reason

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • Lost – Gareth Emery/Janet Devlin  
> • Survivor – 2WEI  
> • Heroes Fall – Hidden Citizens/ESSA

“ _I refuse to fight you, King Morhlun! Can’t we come to an arrangement? … I refuse to fight you, King Morhlun! Can’t we come to an arrangement? … I refuse to fight you, King Morhlun! Can’t we come to an arrangement? … I refuse to fight you, King Morhlun! Can’t we come to an arrangement?_ ”

“ _Side with Zarkon’s brat? You’re a pathetic excuse for a Galran! … Side with Zarkon’s brat? You’re a pathetic excuse for a Galran! … Side with Zarkon’s brat? You’re a pathetic excuse for a Galran! … Side with Zarkon’s brat? You’re a pathetic excuse for a Galran!_ ”

“Rewind…”

“Okay, I get it!” you yelled, grabbing Ezor’s wrist. “I get it, okay? Fighting was his last resort.”

“You say it but you sure don’t look like you mean it. I’m gonna play this footage over and over until you stop sulking!”

You much rather preferred Lotor’s real voice. It’d be some time before you’d have the chance to talk to him. Lotor’s leg was in worse condition than you thought. The bones in his lower left leg were shattered, and it would take more than quintessence to bring him to a full recovery. He needed rest, and you needed to collect yourself.

Because of you, King Morhlun, the leader of the Qohrlians, had been gravely injured. When you heard the news of how much damage inflicted, you’d been a wreck. You took an oath to preserve life and because of Lotor, you broke that oath. When you made no efforts to validate your own actions, Ezor stepped in.

“They were going to be conquered anyway. He had it coming,” Ezor said.

“Yeah, I’m just mad it wasn’t me who did it,” Zethrid grumbled. “Next time, I’ll be the one to take the glory!”

“ _There’s not going to be a next time_ ,” Axca said. “This has never happened before. We were careless. We need to remember that it’s our utmost priority to protect Prince Lotor. We were lucky that (Y/N) was there to act on instinct.”

“Speaking of Lotor, what’ll you think he’ll do to (Y/N)? She saved his life but she still went against his orders,” said Zethrid.

“I bet all my GAC that he’s going to let it slide. We all know he’s got a soft spot for (Y/N). He’s always had a thing for the small ones,” Ezor snickered.

Axca crossed her arms and narrowed her eyes. “His authority and conditions over (Y/N) are absolute. She will continue to complete her tasks. Nothing’s changed.”

“Yeah…except for the fact that she reached 100% capacity when she took down the king,” Ezor snarked.

The device on your wrist continued to record your vitals and activation levels. You had recently learned that when Lotor demanded that you were to be seen by the ship’s physician.

“It’s two in one! You saved his life _and_ reached your goal. You’ll probably get rewarded! Any ideas on what you want, (Y/N)?” Zethrid asked eagerly. “I’d ask for a new planet to conquer in my name.”

“Well…There is one thing I want. I still need to find my friends. It’s been so long since I’ve last seen them, I hope I haven’t forgotten what they looked like.”

“They’re probably dead. OW!” Ezor punched the back of Zethrid’s head and curled her antenna around her mouth. Narti and Kova growled from the commotion.

Axca walked toward you, placing a hand on your shoulder and gave you a warm smile. “I’m sure they’re still alive. They’re probably as worried about you as you are for them.”

“I really do hope you’re right…”

 

* * *

 

It had been several days since Qorhl had been conquered. While you managed to get over your own barbarity, you still blushed at the feeling of Lotor’s forehead against yours. Compared to everything else he’s done, it was the most intimate thing he’s done yet – in front of his and Trovar’s armies, no less.

In his stead, Trovar stayed on Qorhl to carry out Lotor’s demands. It was no surprise that there was more to be done post-siege. Every member on the ship had been busy with the immediate extraction of resources. As a result, your duties had been put on hold. However, it _was_ a surprise that your privileges haven’t been revoked. There had been no word on your impending punishment. You wished Zethrid and Ezor were right, but you knew better than to undermine Lotor’s stringency.

All you could do was wait.

“Ugh. You’d think we’d take some of the Qorhlian fruit too,” Eylek groaned. “I’m sick of these sustenance packets.”

“We took the seeds. You’re just going to have to wait until the fruits blossom. It’ll come,” Groven said.

You absentmindedly pushed the goo with your spoon. When you were confined to your room, food was brought to you. Had you known that those delicacies were provided by to you by Lotor, you wouldn’t have taken it for granted.

“I miss guarding the conservatory. His majesty allowed those who worked there to have the first taste of the seasoned fruits.” Groven sat back, drool falling from his lip as he boasted dreamily. “I could still taste the richness of the kolmon fruit.”

“I didn’t know there’s a conservatory. On what floor?” You activated your map, nudging Eylek to point it out to you.

“It’s one of the Prince’s private rooms.”

“Give it up, (Y/N). You can only eat the fruit if the Prince allows it. You’re still due for a punishment.”

“I just want to check it out. Lotor never lets me go outside. After I went to Qorhl, it’s one of the things I missed the most. Fresh air! The conservatory’s probably the next best thing and according to the map, it’s not one of the restricted areas.”

 

* * *

 

Now that you thought about it, you never explored the unlabeled rooms. You were a bit disappointed in yourself; after all these instances of having your freedom compromised, you had been subconsciously obedient.

Because the library and research facility were located on the second level, you were quite familiar with its layout. The conservatory was only a few corridors away from the research facility. You entered its doors, gasping softly of what was inside. The room was a world of its own, sunlight and blue skies. A cool breeze brushed passed your face, giving you the opportunity to take in the crisp air. You inhaled deeply and quiet closed the doors behind you. How the hell did Lotor manage physically manifest a garden in this small room? Out of everything you’ve seen, this was the most impressive piece of technology.

All sorts of trees and crops towered above you, but you had no desire to seek refuge from the sun’s rays. You basked in its warmth. You took a moment to lift your skirt and kick off your boots and socks – you wanted to feel the texture of the grass beneath your feet. This was heaven.

Through the stalks, you heard the sound of conversation. You stood still, listening in closer to hear the voices approaching. The thickness of the brush made it difficult to gauge how far they were. You had no time to act; by the time you decided to hide behind a tree, Lotor and two others turned the corner. You were a deer in headlights, blinking rapidly at them.

“Shall we discuss the project later, your majesty?” one of the assistants asked.

“Yes. Excellent work, you two.”

The grass’s prickle turned to the coolness of tile. The environment faded, returning to the original design of purple walls and neon lights. The remaining foliage stayed the same, but the loss of the sun dulled their colors.

“Your leg,” you blurted out. Lotor made his way to you, raising his eyebrow. “It’s healed.”

“A few days ago, actually.”

“ _A few days_?! Why didn’t you tell me you were okay?”

“I have many other things to tend to, (Y/N). Don’t tell me you were waiting and had the impression I’d see you first?”

“I was.”

Lotor’s expression fell. You promised to be honest with him, after all. You pouted, a small blush tinting your cheeks.

“I was worried about you.”

“Have you forgotten that seeing me means you will be punished?”

“No. But I saved your life!”

“All the more reason I should have you executed. Little do you know how your impulsive behavior created such a mess. Not only did you defy my orders, you exposed yourself to the entirety of Trovar’s sector!”

Geez. If you knew this is how he was going to thank you, maybe you should’ve let Morhlun rip him a new one.

“I’ve already decided upon your punishment. If you so wish, I will carry out your punishment _now_. Follow me.”

 

* * *

 

Lotor lead you to the research facility. He could’ve chosen a worse location. Considering how much time you’ve spend here, this was a second home. Lotor ordered you to put on your suit and head down to the platform. When you did, you were greeted by his generals.

“Hi, (Y/N)~” Ezor chirped. Zethrid punched her palm with a sadistic grin.

Were they going to beat you?

“This is the first part of your punishment,” Lotor spoke. “You will fight my generals until you fall.”

This was crazy! You’d much rather take the beating. These four grew to be your friends.

“You better not hold back, cuz we won’t be!” Zethrid roared.

“Let’s see how much our little (Y/N) has grown!”

Ezor jumped toward you, wrapping around her antenna, just like the day she met you. Only this time, Narti had used her tail to intensify the constriction. They squeezed the air from you, draining the oxygen from your lungs. Zethrid marched toward you, attempting to pummel your exposed head with her fists. You breathed in as much as you were able, using the flow of quintessence to push your arms outward and loosen Ezor’s and Narti’s grip. You dug your hands into their appendages, swinging your arms around and throwing them both in Zethrid’s direction. Zethrid managed to dodge, causing them both to hit the wall. Hard.

Axca swung her legs around your neck, bringing you down to the floor. In this position, the only thing you could possibly do was break her legs. Zethrid brought her fists down, causing you to forcibly roll away with Axca. You rolled on top, pinning her wrists down with one hand and bending the metallic floor over them. The solidity of the metal prevented her from breaking loose.

“Quit weaseling around! C’MON – FIGHT ME!”

Your head whipped to Zethrid. She already had closed the space between you. You barely managed to grab her hands and hold your ground. No matter what, Zethrid’s strength had always surprised you. Even with your newfound control, you struggled to counter her. But like Zethrid’s Galran brutality, you had something of your own. The dexterity of your human fingers. You pushed the quintessence to your fingertips, burying them into her claws as deeply as you could. Zethrid cried out in pain, jerking her hands inward. The momentary distraction gave you an opening to jump up and kick her backwards to the wall by Ezor.

Wait – where was Narti?

You frantically searched the room, not noticing Kova standing before you. Before you knew it, Narti snuck behind you, placing her hand on your back and knocking you out cold.

 

* * *

 

Your eyelids fluttered open, the facility’s ceiling light blinding you. You groaned, pushing yourself off the ground.

“Your punishment is far from over. Stand up.”

You were still groggy, but the sound of a blade cutting the air brought you back. You gasped, seeing the tip of Lotor’s sword pointed at you.

“I said, _stand_!”

Lotor lunged toward you, swinging in several directions with the intent to cut you down. You backed up, ducking and side-stepping when appropriate. His fighting style was much less refined than you remembered. This movement was easy to predict, more impetuous, _more Galran_.

Luckily, that was what you were used to.

“You will not use your strength?”

“I don’t want to fight you, Lotor!”

“You _will_ fight!”

He jumped and dove, aiming to pierce your heart. You clapped your hands together, using your strength to trap his sword. Lotor grunted as he tried to pull the hilt.

“Stop it! I won’t fight you!”

Lotor ignored you, forgetting the sword and lowered himself to swing his leg around through your ankles. You felt to your bottom and dropped the sword all together, raising your hands to block his fist. You remembered as much as you could from Axca’s hand-to-hand combat training, but strength was your first choice. You hated this, you absolutely hated the expression he wore. You finally had the resolve the end this by grabbing his fist and pushing him back to the ground. You straddled his waist, using only one hand to suppress him.

You fought back tears, shutting your eyes and hiding your face. “I said, _I won’t fight you_.”

“Then you value the preservation of life?”

“I always have!”

“You wish to preserve _my_ life?”

“Of course I do!”

Lotor’s muscles relaxed from under your restraint. You gasped softly, pulling back slightly to allow him to sit up. His expression was completely different from before. His sinister grin returned to his soft one.

“Then I, Prince Lotor, hereby pronounce you, (Y/N) Sanda as captain of my royal guard.”


	8. Find You Black and Blue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • Grow – Frances  
> • Why Don’t You Love Me? – Hot Chelle Rae/Demi Lovato  
> • Perfect – Hedley 
> 
> When MC is alone with Lotor, I highly recommend listening to Grow ;A; <3 I'll star it ***  
> WARNING: Abusive intimidation/suggestive topics of conversation.  
> 

“Then I, Prince Lotor, hereby pronounce you, (Y/N) Sanda as captain of my royal guard.”

“…what?” you breathed out. The lost feeling in your entire body made this all feel like a crazy dream.

Lotor smirked, lifting himself and you off the ground. He sheathed his sword and adjusted his collar, looking to the control room to give his generals the next set of orders. The way he acted was so nonchalant. No way – this had to be all an act.

Were you so predictable that he knew what your reactions would be?

“Are you kidding me right now?” you snapped. “What the hell, Lotor?”

“Thank you for saving my life, (Y/N). Over the course of these last few weeks, you’ve proven yourself more than worthy to rise above your previous occupation.”

“What happened to my punishment?”

“The act was your punishment. More of a test, really. I’m sorry to put you through that. But I had to make sure – I can’t have someone untrustworthy be my bodyguard.”

“What about the Proto Project? And reaching 100% capacity?”

“You’ve already done so more than once.” He lifted your wrist, accessing the screen to your vitals. “The first time you reached capacity was on Qorhl. The second time was during our recent bout. I must say, (Y/N), I'm glad to know you regard me to be more than a friend.” You snatched your wrist back and glared. “The finalization of your tasks has given me more than enough information to proceed with my research, alone.”

“Okay, so you got what you wanted from me and now you want more. You don’t need a guard! The agreement was that this," you said as you gestured to yourself and him,"would be mutually beneficial.”

“You now have the physical capabilities to stand up for yourself, but not the status. As Captain of the Guard, you’ll have a reason to be at my side. Every briefing, every meeting, every moment of leisure. You’ll gain insight to deduce where your friends could be. As promised.”

Ah, so Lotor wanted to open doors for you. This was his secret way of granting you freedom.

“I asked you to trust me. It’s only fair that I reciprocate that trust.”

“By placing your life in my hands?”

“ _We’ll be protecting each other_. The Galra still wish to covet you as their slave. But let them try.” Lotor extended his hand to you. He didn’t reach for your face, shoulder, or hair. “Do you accept this?”

A handshake.

This only meant that he finally considered you an equal.

“Yes.”

 

* * *

 

“Man, I never thought I’d see the day I’d be sporting Galra gear.”

You twirled around, showcasing your new attire to Eylek and Groven. Like Lotor and his generals, you had a custom design of armor. You had to admit, their colors really accentuated your human features in the best way. You felt powerful.

“I'm not surprised you're his personal escort. Still, just a few months ago, you were cleaning lavatories with us!”

“ _Captain of the Guard_ ,” Eylek corrected. “(Y/N) ranks above us, but she still indebted to the prince.”

Groven rolled his eyes, stacking the last of the boxes.

“And our current job still requires your guidance, (Y/N).”

“Oh right!” You took your share of the boxes and walked to the first level. As Captain of the Guard, you were reassigned new living quarters. It wasn’t that much lavish from your previous living space, given that it was adjacent to the prince’s chambers. It was only appropriate you were to protect him while he slept too.

You weren’t guilty about lying to Eylek and Groven; you could’ve easily carried your things by yourself. There was an unspoken certainty – you wouldn’t be able to see each other as much. So, you made the most of the time you  _did_ have together. You had been so invested in your conversation that you failed to notice what or who was in front of you. You bumped into someone, immediately apologizing.

“What do you think you’re doing?”

“Oh, Axca! I was just moving my stuff to my new room.”

She sighed deeply. “You’re Captain of the Guard now. The  _Prince’s_  guard? You shouldn’t have to worry about doing menial tasks like this. Eylek, Groven, carry (Y/N)’s boxes.”

“No! I-I wanted them to help me.”

“We don’t have the time. We’re scheduled to be on the bridge in 5 doboshes.”

“Already?!” you gasped. You had completely forgotten Lotor was to meet with Trovar and his lieutenants. “But I—”

“It’s all right, (Y/N). Groven and I will take care of the rest, you go on. You mustn’t keep his majesty waiting.”

You followed Axca, not before silently mouthing a ‘thank you’ to your dear friends. Time after time, they never failed to help. Where would have been without them?

 

* * *

 

This was the first time you were grateful to the Galra for your quintessence. Without it, you would’ve fallen over. You had been standing at this meeting for almost 3 vargas now. The end was nowhere in sight. No wonder the Galra’s reign had lasted for so long; they were so meticulous and insightful when making decisions for their subjects.

When you first entered the room, no one was visibly surprised by your new colors. Except Trovar. You hadn’t seen him since the attack on Qorhl. At first, you paid no mind to him, but your wandering eyes constantly met with his. Every so often, Axca verbally reprimanded him for his inattention.

“King Morhlun is no more?” Lotor asked.

One of Trovar’s lieutenants lead the briefing, “Unfortunately, King Morhlun had been the only one who opposed to our terms. He spoke for the people without council. The Qorhlians hoped for peace, but Morhlun’s pride resulted in unnecessary means of subjugation. Queen Sorhlana reaped the first opportunity to usurp her brother.”

“Queen Sorhlana would like to speak with you personally, my prince,” Trovar said. “To discuss the future of Qorhl if they are to provide their complete cooperation and devotion to you.”

“If that is true, then I am more than willing to speak with her. When can this be done?”  

“As soon as possible,” Axca said. 

“Tomorrow then. That should be enough time to adequately prepare. Thank you for all your hard work. You are dismissed.”

Lotor gave you a curt nod, signifying your ability to leave. You saluted him and retired to your new quarters. When you arrived, you had intention of changing to your casual wear, but the delay of the automatic doors’ closing had worried you. You hesitated to turn, tightening your first.

“Congratulations, Captain. I’m glad to know that the tension between you and Prince Lotor has settled.”

“Trovar,” you said, your voice small. “What are you doing here?”

When he stepped forward, you turned and braced yourself for defense. “I’ve noticed you’ve climbed the ranks in more ways than one.”

“Does Lotor know you’re here? You’ll be more than reprimanded if he finds out you’re here without permission.”

Trovar ignored you, continuing to move toward you. “You’re still below me. Shall I remind you of what you are? You are property of the empire.” He reached toward you imposingly, causing you to grab his wrist and force him to his knees. You had his arm bent behind him and pushed forward to pressurize the discomfort of his shoulder. His resistance made it difficult to restrain him. “Your spirit only fuels my desire to claim you!”

“ _No one can claim me_ ,” you hissed, kicking his face to the ground and pulling his arm backward.

Trovar laughed, turning his face enough to look back at you. “So much less than a pretty face. Your false sense of security derives from veiled camaraderie.” He grinned. He found your confusion amusing. “You have still so much to learn about our kind. You  _belong_ to Lotor. He’s already doused you in his scent, like a common female!”

“By threatening me, you threaten Lotor. This is an act of treason!” If Lotor found out about this, his inner circle of those he trusts would grow smaller. He already had a feeble hold on the empire as it is. “Why would you do this? You’re risking everything, for what?  _He trusted you_!”

“For centuries, I’ve served both the empire and Lotor,” he spat. “Siege after siege the only reward I’ve received is his trust. Your very being is a prize worth reaping. And when I reclaim you as mine, I’ll present your corpse to the witch!”

Trovar pushed against your hold and twisted to grab at your throat. You grunted, pulling your fist back to pummel his face. Before you landed your attack, two unknown forces suddenly pulled you apart.

"There,there." When you came to, you realized the voice belonged to Zethrid. Ezor and Narti constricted Trovar's movement while Axca pointed her gun to his head. When Lotor stood before him, he struggled even harder.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you,” Ezor warned. “It’s better to just take it.”

“I knew your treachery was imminent. Your instincts have betrayed you,” Lotor said, pointing his sword at Trovar’s throat.

“I never took you for a fool, Lotor. But you ambition has become as weak as that mortal’s nose!”

“It’s because you never questioned my methods that I began to distrust you.”

“You had no reason to this far!”

“I had Narti infiltrate the Neyban sector – you’ve been wanting to steal my research on quintessence for deca-phoebs. Whence you found out that I had taken the Proto Project, your actions spoke for themselves. But never did I expect you to stoop so low as to be threatened by something so  _primitive_  as a claim.”

“You hear but you don’t listen,” Trovar snarled. “Men and women who have served you for centuries—surpassed by a tool. You’ve forsaken them. You've betrayed your kind! Look at her—she breathes and eats but she’s no different than the mindless slaves of Zarkon. Your hardened heart softened by a mortal—”

Lotor cut Trovar’s words, driving his sword through his chest.

“No, Lotor!”

The temperature of the room dropped. Lotor’s face darkened, a low growl resounded from the base of this throat, his lips curled into a snarl to bare his fangs.

“Axca!”

“Y-yes sir?”

“Dispose of Commander Trovar.”

The generals dropped their guard, carrying Trovar’s lifeless body out of your room. Zethrid released you, but you too shaken to move. [***](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-00JWEq23zs)

Should you approach him?

Thank him?

Lotor wiped and sheathed his blade. He ran his fingers through his hair. He exhaled, turning to look at you but hid his mortified gaze. “I’m sorry. My intention to expose Trovar’s treachery was long overdue. I never knew him to pull off something so reckless. I never meant to put you in danger.”

“It’s okay,” you whispered. “I’ve had worse first days on the job.”

Lotor laughed softly. “Thank you. For understanding.”  His smile didn’t convince you that he was settled. His refusal to look into your eyes indicated that he was still guilty.

You both stood in silence. You didn’t have the audacity to give words of affirmation – how could you? Betrayal wasn’t unknown to him, this was expected. But having the audacity to simply say ‘I won’t betray you’ would only pour salt into his wounds.

Meekly, you walked behind him. You slowly reached for his hand, intertwining your fingers with his.

This is what you could offer.

He twitched at the sudden contact and then eventually returned the gesture, squeezing your hand. “I’m sorry,” he breathed out. “I asked you to trust me. I told you nothing would be done without your consent. I’ve betrayed that – I’m sorry.”

“Do you mean the ‘claim’?”

Lotor paused.

“Yes,” he answered.

“Why did you do it?”

“It was a childish. I knew Trovar wanted you, initially, not in that way, and I still—”

“When did you do it?”

He bit his bottom lip, averting his attention to the wall.

“When did you do it?” you asked again.

Lotor finally turned, pointing at your neck. His ears were lowered, a small dark tint appearing on his cheeks. You tilted your head, then pulling the necklace from under your collar.

“My essence,” he stated.

You gasped inwardly, recalling all the times Lotor had initiated contact with you since gifting you the pendant. The library, dinners, your lessons, casual passing, all the times together in the research facility. His caresses weren’t innocent displays of platonic affection.

He was staking a claim on you.

Like a lover would.

You felt the heat rush to your face. You held your face in your hands from embarrassment.

_You’re much safer being used by Lotor than to be loved by him._

_And the Prince still hasn’t publicly claimed you?_

Eylek and Groven knew this whole time. And Trovar. Now, it all made sense.

 _That’s_  why Trovar first referred to you as ‘Lady’.

 _That’s_  why no one reacted to your armor.

And sharing a living space with Lotor only  _confirmed_ what a claim suggests.

The generals, the crew,  _the entire Neyban sector_  smelled Lotor on you. When you carried yourself throughout the ship, you carried him with you. And you smiled and acted without a care in the world. You wanted to bury your head into the ground! 

“I know what you’re thinking. A ‘claim’ suggests that you and I—”

“I know what it means, I know!” You panicked, waving your hands in front of you. “I read the books, just—just please, stop. I’m going to die of a heart attack if you talk about it anymore!”

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have put you in danger by doing something so selfish.”

“Stop saying you’re sorry. Look, I understand why you did it. You wanted to make me untouchable, right? To protect me from anyone who’d think to threaten me? It’s was a precautionary gesture, I get it.”

“…half.”

“What?”

“That’s half the reason.” Lotor sighed, taking your hands again to make you still. “At this point, I have no reason to lie. I fancy you, (Y/N).”

Your heartbeat fluctuated. You stared up at him in utter disbelief. Was Lotor really the type of person to wear his heart on his sleeve? Everyday, he always took you by surprise, leaving you ecstatic by his unpredictability. Without a doubt, this delivery of news was the most unexpected.

He chuckled, pulling you closer so that you were at a lips’ distance. “I enjoy your company. Your curiosity, kindness, selflessness. You never cease to amaze me with the things you do. In time, when I closed my eyes, you continued to comfort me in my dreams. I care for you, (Y/N).” He closed his eyes, resting his forehead against yours. “If you’ll have me, I’d like for you to continue being by my side this way.”

This was too much. The way he bent your morals, the way he broadened your horizons, the way he made your heart swell, the way he broke your spirits only to lift them, of course you grew to love him. 

“Yes,” you said with a smile, rubbing your nose against his. “I’m yours.”

Lotor leaned forward, pressing his lips against yours. His kiss was soft and genuine, much more than you dreamed it to be. 

“And I to you, my love.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two more chapters until we finish Part I! I'm excited to finally introduce canon ahhhh. Here's the season breakdown:
> 
> PART I (Chapters 1-10) : Seasons 1-2  
> PART II (Chapters 11- 20) : Seasons 3-5  
> PART III (Chapters 21-30) : Seasons 6-8 (I'll have this series finish when VLD does) 
> 
> Depending on how S8 goes, I have plenty ideas on what the epilogue will be like. Again, thanks for reading, everyone! <3


	9. The Stars Hold the Moon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • When I Look At You – Alex Edmonds  
> • Crazy in Love – Eden Project/Leah Kelly  
> • (I Can’t Help) Falling In Love With You – Bely Basarte

Your face was inches apart…

…from the wall.

“Just a few more minutes, love,” Lotor said from the communication device in your ear. “I need to test the calibration one last time.”

This had to go down as one of the strangest things Lotor had asked of you. Since being appointed Captain of the Guard, you were relieved from your duties to perform tasks for his research on quintessence. As unconventional his requests were, you much preferred this to heavy lifting. Or regular lifting, in your case.

“All right. Place your hand on the wall now.”

You shrugged, placing your hand until ripples of glowing light emerging from your palm. The wall faded, becoming transparent to reveal Lotor in his chambers on the other side. You became giddy when you saw his hand was lined with yours.

“I can see you!” you exclaimed.

Lotor laughed at your excitement. “Yes. Thanks to the resources I’ve collected in the Rajex System, I’ve found a way for you to continue your duties without sharing chambers.”

“This is so cool! It’s like we’re unofficial roommates. Whoa! _You have chandelier in your room_?!”

“Focus, darling. Now, the real-time projection will only show if you and I have our hands joined. Watch what happens when you let go. Go ahead.”

When you let go, the wall reappeared. However, what remained was the silhouette of Lotor’s hand, also emanating ripples of light.

“If one of us places our hand on the wall, the other can see it on the respective side. Should one of us be in danger, we can subtly call each other.” You touched the wall again, revealing Lotor’s smirk. “But of course, I won’t limit its recreational uses.”

“ _Within reason_ ,” you teased. “I like the idea of saying goodnight this way.”

When you walked away, Lotor scoffed.

“Little minx.”

You rejoined Lotor in the corridor, making your way to the bridge for your scheduled briefing. The empire beyond Lotor’s territories were undergoing complete chaos. Of course, Lotor had been frequently informed on all matters regarding the empire. You had been present through them all, but nothing you thought had enough importance to pinpoint your friends’ locations. At least, not yet.

“Several prison facilities have been liberated by the Voltron Paladins,” Axca stated. “We have been instructed to recapture any prisoners seen in our quadrant. If we see any of the lions, we are to attack on sight.”

Ezor scoffed. “If they even make it this far.”

“Be serious, Ezor. An attack on the empire is imminent. We must be ready to help the empire at any time.”

Lotor was visibly unaffected by his father’s struggle. Anything concerning Zarkon or the empire seemed to go in one ear and out the other. The only obvious quality that they shared was their obsession with quintessence.

“The most we will do is acknowledge my father’s requests. If we see a lion, only then will we act.”

“But we oversee the Neyban sector now,” you said. “It’s actually within the vicinity of the empire. Isn’t there a higher chance that Voltron will be seen there? If it is, and Trovar isn’t there to report in—”

“—which is exactly why we’re heading there now,” Lotor interjected. “I’ve already appointed a lieutenant to replace Trovar for such an occasion. By now, Central Command has probably distributed maps specifically tailored to tracking down the lions. We’ll be cross-referencing star-charts to have that information for ourselves When we arrive to the Neyban sector, we must act fast. Axca, you will remain at the helm to receive Lieutenant Tarlip. Zethrid, you will ensure that he complies to share what he knows. Ezor and Narti, I want you to infiltrate their headquarters to seize all additional information that they may be withholding from us.”

“What sort of information?” you asked.

“Changes in authority, supply routes, anything really. With Voltron around, my father has probably taken drastic measures to preserve what he has left.”

Right. Lotor’s exile had always given him the short-end of the stick. But even if was exiled, you thought it to be harsh that Zarkon never tried to or even attempt to nurture his heir, even if this was the same man who ordered your enslavement.

“Would it be possible to get the names and faces of the prisoners?”

“It’s not impossible,” Ezor said.

“Feel free to retrieve that information as well,” Lotor said. “How much longer until we reach our destination?”

“One varga,” Axca replied.

“Good. Then we mustn’t waste any time. Prepare the ship. (Y/N), come with me.” 

 

* * *

 

You followed Lotor to the launch bay, sitting atop a cargo box as Lotor inspected his checklist.

“Thank you letting Ezor and Narti get the prisoner log for me.”

“It’s nothing. Most likely the data sync would have included that information.”

“Still though, I appreciate it.”

“You’re one step closer to your comrades, (Y/N). Tell me, what position did you have when you piloted your aircraft?”

“I…didn’t,” you confessed quietly. “I was learning to be a doctor, not a pilot.”

Lotor frowned, his ears lowering in dismay. “Even Galran doctors have basic piloting skills. Perhaps that is my fault, I’ve sheltered you too much. How did it come to be that you were chosen to travel in space without the necessary skillset?”

“On earth, we have something called The Galaxy Garrison. It’s a branch of our nation’s military that specializes in space exploration…my aunt is the admiral. When I graduated, she was the one who recommended that I work there. Later, I started to sign on expeditions. It only made sense that I tended to my regular patients in space, too.”  

“So, you were related to the admiral. You and I are more akin than I thought, love. Your merit must have gone unnoticed, having a family member be a high-ranking official,” he said with a smirk.

Was he being empathetic or sarcastic? You rolled your eyes and then playfully stuck your tongue at him.

“All right, _Prince_ Lotor. While everyone else is carrying out your demands, where are we going?”

“Planet Lyra. I have business there. With Trovar gone, regular shipments of the seeds have stopped.”

“We’re going garden shopping?”

“Ezor’s cheekiness is rubbing off on you,” Lotor sighed, walking over to place his hands on your hips to lower you to the ground. “No. I’m going to speak with their queen to discuss a new trading agreement.” 

You nodded, saluting him before he turned a heel to board a ship. It was remarkably smaller than his personal fighter, though the colors still matched.

“I’ve had my engineers rebuild Trovar’s ship. I figured you would need your own means of transportation one day.”

Your own ship? You slowly approached it, gently placing your hand on the exterior, just as you did earlier on the wall.

“Do you like it?”

“You’re right, Lotor. You really do spoil me,” you laughed. “Yeah, I love it. Thank you!”

“Let’s give it a test ride, shall we?”

The interior of the ship was completely remodeled. Its layout and aesthetic were familiar to you. You appreciated every detail, from the windows to the seat lining – especially since it was specifically designed for you.  Lotor knew how much you loved the outside, and how you wished to see the sun rise and set. With this ship, you’d be able to witness its beauty from every angle.

You both were seated in the cockpit, Lotor taking the reigns while you buckled yourself in. For now, you didn’t bother paying attention to the buttons pressed or dials turned. This was your second trip to a new planet, Lotor would want you to enjoy it. Otherwise, your piloting lessons would’ve begun as soon as you entered the ship.

You hugged your knees, enjoying the view outside as Lotor piloted. Planet Lyra was much greener than Earth and Qorhl and surprisingly, had less bodies of water. When the ship finally entered the atmosphere, a mountainous terrain appeared through the clouds. Adjacent to both sides of the terrain were many lakes and forests. Out of all the visible foliage, which plant did Lotor want seeds for? Flowers? Trees? All of it?

“No!” Your daze ended abruptly by Lotor’s sudden grunt, the ship violently leaning to the left. You winced, slowly opening your eyes to see the incoming lasers shoot along the mountain’s range. “We’ve been hit!”

“By what?!”

“Trovar must have set those defenses. He knew I wouldn’t personally collect my shipments and yet he still implemented the means to kill me. A traitor through and through.” Lotor grit his teeth as he struggled to handle the controls. “This was meant to be a peaceful expedition!”

Although he managed to successfully evade the attacks, you knew the ship wouldn’t last much longer. The emergency alarms were deafening, and the left wing was severely damaged. Sparks ignited a small fire, the flames grew and began to rapidly move toward the cockpit.

“Lotor!”

Without warning, Lotor ejected you from your seat, your body thrown into the air like a ragdoll. You whimpered, struggling to keep yourself still. You looked toward the distance and saw the ship plow through the forest before meeting its end with an explosion. Your heart stopped – he was never a man to go down with his ship.  You frantically searched the sky, relieved when you spotted his figure a hundred feet below you.

Lotor fell with his back to the ground, reaching out to you.

“(Y/N!)”

You nose-dived toward him and extended your arm. The moment you were within a fingertips’ distance, he grabbed your wrist and roughly pulled you toward him, securely wrapping around your waist. He pivoted his body upright, turning you with him.

“Activate your jets when I tell you to!”

“Got it!”

“NOW!”

You pressed a button on your collar bone, activating the boosters on your back and at the bottom of your feet. The dynamic resistance caused the both of you to break your fall. When you reached the ground, Lotor threw off your helmet, taking your face into your hands.  

“(Y/N)! Are you all right?!”

“Yeah,” you coughed. “Lemme go, your hair’s making it hard to breathe.”

Lotor released you, taking your hand to lead you to the crash site and access the damage. Or, what was left of it. He snarled, pulling his own helmet off.

“Blast! The entire left flank is destroyed. It’s unrecoverable.”

“Prince Lotor! Thank the ancients, you’re safe!” A woman emerged from the woods, several guards following behind her. They all looked almost human, given that their ears were pointed and skin striped like tigers. The woman looked relatively young, a crown atop her voluminous head of orange hair.

“Queen Farla,” Lotor said.

“A thousand apologies, my prince! Commander Trovar put those defenses there without my approval. We’ve been working tirelessly to disable them after we learned of his passing. When I saw the sigil of your ship, I immediately knew it was you. Please forgive me, my prince!” Farla knelt to the ground, her guards following suit.

“Please, stand,” he sighed. “Since I’ve learned of Trovar’s treachery, this comes to me as no surprise. I’ve come to discuss the continuation of our trade agreement _without_ outside discretion.”

“Of course, my prince! This is unforgiveable, I am more than willing to give you thrice the load of shipments. With Trovar gone, we are now able to farm with reservation. Please, my prince, allow me to show you.”

“Yes, of course. Queen Farla, allow me to introduce my Captain of the Guard, (Y/N).”

“It is an honor to meet you, my lady,” Queen Farla said with a curtsy.

My lady?

You cringed from embarrassment, hiding your face from Lotor’s smirk.

 

* * *

 

Lotor did not meet with Farla in the castle. Instead, she personally escorted the both of you throughout the farmlands. You’ve seen these trees and crops before, in Lotor’s conservatory. Planet Lyra supplied most of what Lotor had attempted to sustain. The Lyran people were peaceful farmers, making their living with a green thumb. Most of the civilians were out in the fields while those who preferred specialized labor spent their days in laboratories and kitchens to develop new concoctions.

You learned that the pendant you held was a Rose of Lyra – the people’s most prized flower. Because of its spiritual and medicinal properties, they rarely harvested it. Consuming or applying the flower’s extract matched the healing capabilities of quintessence.

You pouted.

Even long before you knew, Lotor spoiled you.

“Is that everything, my prince?” Queen Farla asked.

“This is more than enough, Queen Farla. I cannot thank you enough for your generosity.”

“Please, this is nothing. I still feel there is more I must do to in exchange for almost taking your life and my lady’s.”

You choked on your kolmon fruit.

“There is no need. Unfortunately, I must take my leave. It is good seeing you again, Queen Farla.”

You continued to mindlessly eat, watching Lotor speak to Axca through his communication device.

“That’s…odd. I must be far out of range. (Y/N), can you reach Axca?”

“No, I just hear static.”

“Quiznak. The ship’s communicator must also have been damaged if we’re not able to signal the main cruiser.”

“My prince, I am willing to lend you our devices but… we’ve shut down all means of radioactive energy to preserve the plants. If we restart the generator now…we won’t be able to access a hailing frequency until tomorrow. You and my lady are more than welcome to spend the night in the castle.”

Lotor’s head whirled to you. “(Y/N)? (Y/N) are you all right?!”

“My lady is choking! Someone, please help!”

 

* * *

 

Well, that was embarrassing.

Your choking had summoned the whole population of Lyra.

You threw yourself on the bed, staring at the flower design on the canopy. Every painting, embellishment, statue, broach, and shoe sole donned the Rose of Lyra. Even your dress had microscopic roses sewn in. Somehow, on this planet, the pendant on your neck didn’t bloom as brilliantly as it did on the ship.

Lotor entered the room, running a hand through his hair, sighing impatiently. “Lyra’s ships are meant only for domestic travel. They prioritize the sustainability of their planet. If not for Trovar, they would’ve been easily enslaved by the Galra.”

“So we’re stuck?”

“Until their generators recharge. I’ll be the first to know when it’s powered. Hopefully, Axca won’t be brazen and assume we’ve been taken hostage or killed.”

That could’ve been the case.

The two of you almost _died_.

“Can we trust Farla?”

Lotor paused, smiling to himself before tilting his head at you. “What do you think?”

“She seems harmless. She hasn’t done anything to make me think otherwise. Usually, I can gauge how someone’s going to be if they say something about my humanity to my face.”

“Speaking from experience? I knew you had reservations about Trovar from the first day you met him.”

“Do you know I still have reservations about you, _my prince?_ ”

“Oh, I doubt that, _my lady_ ,” he purred.

Oh no.

You knew that look.

You stifled a laugh, attempting to hide away until he captured you in his arms. “Farla said it nonstop! Why does me saying it make any difference?”

“Because it’s _you_.” Lotor closed his eyes, kissing your temple down to your jawline. You shivered from the sudden intimacy, looking away in embarrassment when he watched you with hooded eyes. He noticed your line of sight matched the door, causing him to eagerly bring his lips to your collarbone. “It’s dangerous to look there, love. Stay with me.”

Your breath hitched when he grazed his fangs along the base of your neck, teasingly nipping at your skin before biting and sucking. You gasped, lifting your hips, hoping to settle the need between your legs. Lotor pulled away, admiring his new mark on you.

“Lovely.”

You panted, looking at him pleadingly before placing your hands on his shoulders to bring him down for a kiss. Your invitation prompted his excitement, a sudden aggression overcoming him as he pushed you down to trap you under him. You dragged him in for another bruising kiss, his tongue moving to meet yours as his hands roamed over your legs and hips. He pressed his lower half to yours, finally releasing a moan from you. He tensed, stopping and then pulling away.

“Are you okay?” you asked, caressing his face.

By his expression, you were more worried than irritated.

He leaned into your touch, kissing the palm of your hand. “I don’t want to take you like this. Not here,” he breathed out. “Not under these circumstances.”

“Even if I’m okay with it?”

“Yes but…I’d rather consummate my claim in the comfort of our own home.”

Oh.

You smiled, pressing an innocent kiss to the tip of his nose. It made you happy to know he valued and wanted to ensure your comfort.

“I don’t mean to disappoint.”

“That’s okay. I like doing it in dark places anyway. It’s still a beautiful day out in Lyra.”

He laughed, pulling into his lap and nuzzling your hair. “Allow me to make it up to you.”

 

* * *

 

After ejecting you from the sky, almost dying, and leaving you…frustrated…Lotor had a lot to make up for. And he did, by allowing you to explore the city and markets. The people were kind, the skies were clear, and the vibe was tranquil. After being cooped up in space, this was just what you needed.  Whatever you wanted to do, Lotor followed through, even doing something as ridiculous as dancing in the square or painting with the children. In those joyous moments spent together, you found yourself admiring his smile.

He needed this too.

Lotor pat the top of the children’s heads, bidding them goodbye. The day was coming to its end. When the sun set in Lyra, the civilians put away their gloves to turn in for the day.  You waited for Lotor patiently, enjoying the change in atmosphere from day to dusk.

“What’s next, love?”

You shook your head. “I think we’ve done about everything I can think of.”

“If there’s nothing left, then allow me to show you something. Come.”

You took Lotor’s hand, following him from the outskirts of the city through the forest. The remnants of light from the setting sun pierced through the trees. You navigated with ease, the forest floor flooded with soft flowers than excess brush. The birds filled the air with their last song as Lotor lead you to a clearing.

The sunset’s rays cast over an open field of flowers – wild Roses of Lyra. Petals of not only blue, but white and lavender danced in the air with the river’s rushing waters. Fireflies rose with the moon, illuminating the flowers’ color.

Lotor brought one knee to the ground, reaching to take a lavender rose. You tried to protest, but he had already plucked it from the ground to set it above your ear.

“Don’t worry. It is only the blue flowers that they worship.” He brought both your hands to his lips, giving a delicate kiss to each knuckle. “Do you like it?”

You nodded, far too overwhelmed to give him a proper answer. Tears of joy brimmed the corner of your eyes as you nimbly wrapped your arms around him. You could feel him through his chest, then his fingers combing through your hair.

“You are my rose. I’ve nurtured you to no one’s benefit except my own. With what you’ve given me, I’ve grown to be your slave, desperate for your essence. So fragile and lovely, your thorns remind me of the pain of solitude. Even so, I will endure each prick until I am bled dry.”

On earth, no one has ever treated you as sweetly as he did. You tried to find your voice, but you could only respond with tears. He kissed each away, cradling you with such love and affection that it brought you to more tears.

“Don’t force yourself, darling.”

You were glad that even as excessively romantic this moment was, you could still be yourself around him. “Thank you, Lotor.”

He opened his mouth to speak, but a screech broke his thought.

 “—tor.” More static sounded from his wrist, a voice trying to break through distortion. He adjusted a few levels to encourage a more coherent sound. “Lotor. Prince Lotor. Do you copy?”

“Axca! Yes, I’m here. Can you hear me?”

“Yes! Your majesty, Ezor and Narti will be arriving in their fighters to convene on your location. We’ve spoken with the Lyran queen – Zethrid has already loaded every bit of cargo onto the ship.”

“Thank you, Axca. Postpone their arrival to one varga. I have one last matter to attend to.”

“Sir, I urge you to return immediately. Your presence is required on the ship.”

“…by who?”

“Haggar.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was my longest chapter yet, oh man. Hope y'all like that makeout sesh. It was about damn time they did somethin'. Mama Haggar ain't havin' it.


	10. My Broken Pieces

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • Out of Time – Hidden Citizens  
> • Sun and Moon – Above and Beyond  
> • I’ll Follow – Svrcina (This is 1/4 of the major songs that convinced me to write this fic!)

It was only Lotor’s voice that traveled through the ship. Every order and demand were done without question. No one had the audacity to hesitate or think twice. People seemed to come and go through the corridors, their actions fueled by pure fear and adrenaline.

You were to follow one demand: stay by his side. Lotor’s strides were long and fast and through the bustling crew, you had difficulty keeping up. When you disappeared from his sight, he scolded you like a father who had lost his child. The impatience and irritation in his voice was more than unsettling.

Haggar directed all projects dealing with quintessence and magic, the Proto Project included. Even if she was not physically present, Lotor took all precautionary measures to prevent the possibility of your existence leaking. The conservatory, his quintessence research, reserves, Qorhl, the Neyban sector, Lyra, _you_ …he couldn’t risk losing them all simply because Zarkon disapproved.

When he deemed the security satisfactory, he led you to his private study. “You will be confined to the study until told otherwise, am I clear?” he barked. “In the time you’ll spend here, you will be diligent, obedient, subservient. You will be severely punished if I hear that you even _attempt_ to leave.”

You nodded, eyes to the ground. He was serious. This wasn’t like Qorhl, where you thoughtlessly act without consequence.

This was _Haggar_.  

Lotor pressed his lips into a line, quickly pressing a kiss to your forehead.

“I’ll be back soon. You’ll be in safe hands,” he said before pushing you inside.

You clumsily tripped forward, taking a moment to plant your feet. When you first entered his study, you thought the first thing you’d see was a desk, not a pair of boots. Your eyes scanned up, seeing a Galran woman with a pointed chin, nose, and cat ears. Her expression was tart, eyes narrowing to scrutinize your entire being. She grunted with disgust, smacking the top of your head with a crop.

“PALEN-BOL!”

“OW! What the hell?!”

“ _This_ is Prince Lotor’s consort?! So fleshy and soft. And you’ve not a single glint of ferocity in your eye!”

“Are we just…are we just going to skip the introductions?”

“PALEN-BOL!”

You cursed, rubbing your shoulder this time. “OW! Would you _quit it_?!”

“Provocative language? Such disrespect! I did not raise the Prince to fraternize with peasants!” she snarled.

“’Raise’? Then you’re…Dayak.” Lotor spoke highly of her during your exchanges in the library. You grimaced. At least now you know where he gets his manners from. “What’re you doing here?”

“Prince Lotor had personally summoned me to rear you in the ways of the Galra. We will begin our lessons _now_.”

 

* * *

 

Apparently, Dayak heard of you just as much as you’ve heard of her. She knew better than to tutor you with the enlightening pain. Weights, sentinels, a fight to the death? You proved your understanding of 'vrepit sa' on Qorhl. In this empire, your greatest weakness was _knowledge_. Just punching your way wasn’t enough to help you gain status.

Dayak had you seated at the desk, face pressed to the parchment to transcribe her lessons verbatim. Your hand cramped, breaking a pen every now and then to purposely catch a break. Poor baby Lotor must’ve had to go through this _and_ the enlightening pain.

“No other society in the galaxy has accomplished the feats of the Galra. Deca-phoebs of never-ending conquest, the ambition to leave no territory unexplored, no resource unharvested.”

Every planet enslaved, you thought.

Throughout your lessons, you’ve resisted the impulse to comment, sigh, or make any gesture that would provoke Dayak’s hand. You both had a goal – why risk the opportunity to learn about your enemies? Oh, but how you wanted to counter every proud statement she made about the Galra’s endeavors.  

“There are very few nations that the Galra have deemed worthy enough to be considered allies. Rygnirath, Nalquod, the Dalterion Belt, and Altea – these with the planets that matched Emperor Zarkon’s strength and ambition. But they’ve all gone.”

Your hand stopped. Altea was the planet Lotor’s mother came from. Was Zarkon so heartless to destroy the home planet of the love of his life?

“Are all the Alteans gone?” you blurted. You heard Dayak’s pacing stop for a moment, then again to stand next to you. You didn’t dare to look at her, unsure if she’d use her crop on you for your outburst.

“Yes. No Alteans have survived Emperor Zarkon’s hand,” she said grimly.

Then…Lotor was the last of his kind.

“Why do you all still serve him? He’s nothing but pure evil.”

“Such naivety. Our way of life is preserved. The destruction of Daibazaal had also meant the end of the Galra. To survive solely by starfaring ensured extinction. Lest the Galra slowly die out, Emperor Zarkon has proved the universe otherwise with the might of his fist. As he did, so shall Prince Lotor.”

“You condone needless bloodshed?”

“PALEN-BOL!”

You winced, expecting the crop to meet your forehead, but its end landed on your parchment.

“There is more to the Galra – our society, our customs, our battle philosophies, we are a nation born from war. Our way of life has proven to be most superior.” Dayak sighed, pulling her crop back onto her shoulder. “But with power comes responsibility. Strong we’ve become, yes, but the Galra have lost discipline. They've settled. 'Vrepit sa' no longer holds meaning. Proclamations have become weak, lazy! Our people salute but have no understanding of what the 'killing thrust' truly entails.”

You watched Dayak’s back, furrowing your eyebrows disconcertingly. “You dislike the Galra for changing. You’re against all the violence.”

“We were once a proud race unified through our insatiable thirst for knowledge, to improve the welfare for our people. In the days of the Paladins of Old, the Galra never killed on a whim. These contemporary methods, rubbish! One cannot rule an empire on ruthlessness alone. Their ambitions are small and pathetic. But I’ve raised Lotor as no other Galran governess ever could, by keeping our old tradition sacred. Lotor is more Galran than the full breeds who condemn his heritage. As his consort, you must know, what the empire considers unorthodox was once the foundation of Daibazaal.”

You were surprised. Lotor wasn't inherently honorable. Dayak was the one who reared him in the shadows. If Zarkon knew of her agenda she'd be executed for treason. That's when you realized...she was someone you could trust.

You smiled, giving a small nod. “I know. Everything about him is fantastic – his eccentricity is what makes him stronger. When he takes the throne, he’ll redefine what it means to be Galra, and change so many lives for the better. Like mine. And I have you to thank for that.”

Dayak pursed her lips in surprise, then cleared her throat. “Very good. Now we can move on to proper etiquette.”

Just when you thought you reached her heart, she smacked your shoulders and thighs.

“The people will expect a non-Galran consort to sit like harlot! Back straight! PALEN-BOL!”

 

* * *

 

Either Haggar sharing her life story or Lotor was dead, because he was taking too damn long.

Whatever task the royal family assigned Dayak, she meant to fulfill it and _beyond_. From history lessons, royal etiquette, language, fighting styles, to now attire, Dayak had the intention of making you an honorary Galran. What were you more surprised of? The amount of vargas you’ve spent in this room, or Dayak’s efficiency?  Considering the latter, you were more attentive than usual.

You grabbed the top of the desk chair, biting the inside of your cheek and wincing as Dayak tightened the corset of your armor. Besides that, you were dressed head to toe in her same fashion.

“Is this really necessary?” you grunted.

“Your posture is horrendous. So yes, it is necessary.”

“Y’know, you remind me a lot of my aunt—OW!”

“There! Oh, it’s perfect!” she gushed. She pushed you toward the mirror, making one last adjustment to the hem of your skirt. “Now, you’re a true servant of the empire.”

On cue, the door opened. Axca carefully stepped in then saluted. “Lady Dayak, Haggar is gone. I’m here to escort (Y/N) to her chambers.”

“I see. And my escort?”

“I’ve sent for Narti, she should be arriving soon. Prince Lotor has asked for me to take her. I’ll let you finish the last of your lessons. I’ll be waiting outside.”

When Axca closed the door, you pulled the tab on your waist to release the corset. “I appreciate your lessons, Dayak. Thank you for everything. I’ll never forget what you’ve taught me.” With a bow, you made your way to the door.

“(Y/N).”

“Yes?”

“…You will never be true Galra. No amount of tutelage can change that. I could teach you for as long as the universe stands but you will remain what you are: mortal. Lotor will live, and you will die. However, what you possess is something no other being can give him. That’s all I’ve left to say.”

You said nothing, giving your last nod before closing the door behind you. You didn’t have the time to process her advice, because Axca gripped your hand and forced you down the corridor. You called her name, but she gave no response, continuing to hastily find a secluded spot.

“I’m sorry. I lied. I just needed to tell you before Lotor makes the decision to make this a game. But…I don’t think he’ll come forward to you either way.”

“W-what? What happened with Haggar?”

“Emperor Zarkon has fallen from a battle with Voltron.”

Your eyes widened, heart stopping.

“Lotor is the now the emperor.”

 

* * *

 

Commander Holt,

Matt,

Shiro.

Were they still alive?

Could you still save them?

Where were they now?

You lost track of how much time you’ve spent staring into your hands. The edge of the bed had sunk in from your weight, maybe even the weight that burdened your heart. It’s been so long since their names passed through your mind. How cruel of you to think of them only when it suited you and your comfort.

With the universe now at your fingertips, where could you possibly start?

You looked ahead at the wall. It would be even more cruel to abandon Lotor in his time of need.

You lifted yourself off the bed, placing your hand. “Lotor?”

No response.

“I know you’re in there.”

….

“Lotor, please I—”

When his hand suddenly matched yours, he appeared on the other side. Your smile faded when you saw his face. The usual light of curiosity was glazed over, his lips resting than speaking a witty line. You ran to his door and knocked. Again, no response, so you barged in.

“Lotor.”

He was seated on one of his couches, hunched over as his forearms rested on his knees. You knelt beside him to look him in the eyes. He scoffed at the innocence you displayed.

“So, you know.”

“Yeah…”

“Who told you?”

“What does it matter? You’re to be emperor. The whole universe is going to find out eventually.”

“The whole universe is going to find _you_. You don’t understand. I’ve trained my entire life for this moment, albeit, not this soon. I didn’t anticipate _you_.”

“…then we stop hiding.”

“Don’t play—”

“I’m serious! We be ourselves now more than ever. When was the last time you cared what others think? You said I could protect myself, right?”

Lotor released a sigh, placing his hand behind your neck to bring your face forward. “It’s not that easy, little one. I’ve meant to make you untouchable.”

“And I will be. With you as emperor. The moment you take the throne, no one will have the gall to defy you. And even if they do, I’ll be the one to kick their butt. Your generals, too.”

“You’re too much,” he laughed. “Thank you. Thank you for remaining at my side.”

There it was, his smile.

Is this what Dayak meant?

“You protected me. Now, I’ll protect you. I will follow you anywhere.” You brought your lips to his, caressing his cheek. “You’re going to make a great emperor, I know it.”

“Enlighten me, darling. What makes you so certain I’m not a bloodthirsty loon?”

You took his hands into yours, looking into his eyes with both love and admiration. “You were born to change the universe. Your very being exemplifies that. And because of you, so many people have escaped death and enslavement. They know who you are, and you’ve shown me your heart.” You tightened your hold and spoke slowly, “ ** _You are not Zarkon_**.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WE'RE DONE WITH PART I! Now we're onto canon and I'm so friggin' excited ahhhhh. 
> 
> Also, I had so much fun writing Dayak she's the cold, distant mother I've never had.


	11. As Loud as Lions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • Read All About It Pt. III – Emeli Sandé  
> • King – Lauren Aquilina  
> • Skinny Love – Birdy

“South.”

“I’m East.”

“Narti is north. I’m west.”

“Northwestern entrance,” you said. “I’m right above all of you.”

“Excellent. I can finally stop toying with this beast. Time to expose the traitor.”

You looked to the arena, watching the beast struggle to land an attack. Lotor effortlessly evaded each one, tiring the beast to make it convenient to cut him down at the right moment. This was to be his first public appearance as acting emperor and he had every intention to do so with his own style and flair. The gladiator ring was the perfect place to finally address his doubters.

Lotor disarmed the beast, causing the spectators to roar with excitement. Unmasking his identity had only caused an even greater reaction. No one cared to look anywhere but the arena. This way, it would be even easier to apprehend the traitor.

“Throk, you wish to challenge me? Then come down and claim your crown.”

The first part of your job was to ensure Throk made no attempt to leave. When the generals surrounded him, you made your way down to the pit. The second part would be a little more difficult.

Your heart swelled with pride as you watched him subdue Throk, the people pledging their allegiance to him soon after. This all was second nature for Lotor, he really meant to do this.

After the scene, you made stealthily followed Throk through the exit. Before he could act, you restrained his arms and legs. He turned his head, noticing the colors you wore.

“You…! You’re—”

You kicked his chest to the ground. “You will not speak. I am to arrest you for attempting to commit mutiny against the _crown prince_.”

“Glorified concubine,” he growled.

“Commander Throk, you are demoted of your rank and hereby the new post guard of the Ulippa System.” You finished cuffing his wrists, then standing to allow the robotic sentries take your place. “Take him away.”

You watched the sentries walk away, then rejoined Lotor at the pit’s entrance.

“There you are. I trust that Throk did not give you much trouble?”

You removed your helmet, smirking. “None whatsoever.”

“Aw! Our little (Y/N)’s grown up!” Ezor squealed.

“Let us return to the ship. We’ve much to discuss.”

 

* * *

 

There were many things required of Lotor…that he disregarded. He had every right to manage the empire by his own methodology, especially since this was his first welcome from the empire in over a thousand years. He refused to move to Central Command. Without access to his personal resources, his leadership wouldn’t be nearly effective.

From what was gathered from the empire’s current intel, Voltron’s attempts to build a coalition against the empire were not as prolific. From your perspective, their attempts at liberation did more harm than good. Fighting, no matter the reason, caused injury and death. By reclaiming liberated planets, Lotor could ensure their protection, survival and freedom. With the help of his generals alone, Lotor accomplished so much in just days – with his population steadily rising, there was really no need for you to be constantly at his side.

“As for the whereabouts of the Voltron lions, we’ve had reports of yellow and blue in the Paglium quadrant. The red one has been seen throughout these quadrants. And the green one here, here, and here.”

“No Black Lion?”

“We’ve questioned the planet’s inhabitants. No one has seen it.”

“It’s like it just vanished. Poof!”

“No Black Lion, no Voltron. Narti, go to planet Puig and _speak_ with their leader. We’ll be proceeding with our plans to take the lions.”

“When they converge on our location, what then?” you asked. “You’re the face of the empire they’re not going to go down without a fight.”  

“Of course. I expect no less from the Paladins of Voltron.”

You knew Lotor trusted you, but you never expected him to share every thought he had. Becoming too preoccupied with his thoughts would distract you from finding your comrades. Still, you couldn’t help yourself to think if Lotor would execute the Paladins when captured. Voltron was the Defender of the Universe – at least some of their philosophies lined with his, right?

The lions fell for Narti’s deception, arriving to the Panglium quadrant. Lotor’s cruiser zeroed in on their location, ready to release his robotic fighters.

“Attention, Paladins of Voltron. This is Prince Lotor, son of Zarkon, Emperor Pro Tem of the Galra Empire. Surrender now, or you will be destroyed.”

You couldn’t believe your eyes. The legendary lions were right here before you. Green, Yellow, and—

“Hey, it’s the black kitty!”

“So, it survived. Where are the others? Send out the rest of the fighters. Let’s see if we can draw them out.”

“They’re fast,” you said in awe. “But it’s just like you said, Lotor. They’re scattered. But you’re all holding back?”

“That’s because we’re also testing the functionality of every individual lion,” Axca said. “So far, we can only test for evasive maneuvers.”

The more fighters Lotor released, the more the Paladins resisted. Eventually, the paladins had no choice but to bring the rest of the lions and the Altean ship into the fight.

“What are your orders, sir? Should we fire on the lions?”

“No, we’ve seen enough. Retreat.”

You hid your relief. He didn’t destroy them. So, this event was to measure their competency. And based off what you witnessed, they were nowhere near ready to tip the empire again. Their ambition was admirable though; within the hour, they continued to tail the cruiser.

“What troubles you, (Y/N)?” Lotor teased. “You’ve been sighing the moment the lions appeared.”

“They have no idea what they’re getting themselves into,” you said. “Now, we really have to fight.”

“The lions will be on us in one varga. What are your orders?”

“I say we turn around and start shooting!” Zethrid bellowed.

“We just learned all five lions are operational. There’s still much we don’t know. Keep the cruiser on this heading until my return.  Ready my fighter. I’m going to attack the lions myself.”

“You’ll never take them all out alone.”

“I’m not trying to.”

Distancing yourself from Lotor was never easy. You learned that with each trip he made alone to the Rajex System. Whenever he entered the battlefield or his fighter, you grew anxious. Of course, you knew he was more than skilled, but the tinge of fear was to be expected. You wanted him to be safe. As of now, it was your top priority.

The Paladins had difficulty dodging Lotor’s attacks, scrambling to avoid being hit from lasers and each other. But how was this possible? If the lions chose their own pilots, shouldn’t they be capable of harnessing its individual power? Something was amiss.

“Zarkon fell to…this?” you asked. “These are the same lions, right?”

“I was thinking the exact same thing,” Zethrid scoffed.

“Axca, set a course for these coordinates. I’m going to lure the lions there.”

“Thayserix? Why?”

 “These are not the same Paladins who defeated my father. They do not fight as a unit and are unable to form Voltron. Perhaps my father did as much damage to their team as they did to him. Whatever the case, they’re vulnerable and we need to take advantage.”

You scooted in towards Zethrid, nudging her arm. “I gotta admit, this is pretty boring.”

She grinned sadistically. “Yeah, no kidding. All this restraint is getting us nowhere.”

“(Y/N)! If this bores you, then please contact Central Command to bring back up,” Axca ordered.

“Yes, ma’am!” You lifted your wrist, activating your communicator to signal other cruisers within the quadrant.

“Lotor is right on top of the lions, they have no idea!”

On the monitor, you watched Lotor circle the lions. “He’s corralling them?” Their formation was respective to each part of Voltron. You carefully watched the Black Lion, studying its flight pattern. As Lotor said, its pilot was unsure of themselves, its movement was reckless and forced. No matter how many mistakes it made, it refused to let Lotor escape. In the pit of your stomach, you felt something churn.

A feeling of guilt.

 

* * *

 

_“This is the fourth time this week.” You were irate, you never wanted to make it a habit to visit Sanda’s office._

_“…”_

_“Keith, you can’t keep doing this. Without Shiro, Sanda won’t hesitate to ban you from the Garrison grounds,” you sighed as you dabbed antiseptic on his cheek. “All the other nurses are sick of seeing you.”_

_“…are you going to tell Shiro?” he mumbled._

_“No, you are. I’ve had my fair share of times scolding you. You  obviously listen to him more.”_

_When he turned his back to you, your heart clenched. You sat beside him, wrapping an arm around him supportively._

_“I’m sorry. I know how difficult this must be for you, but this is the way it’s going to be for the next year. You need to start being accountable for your actions. Just know, that leaving you is the last thing we want to do.”_

_“I’ll miss you.”_

 

* * *

 

“…Keith?”

No, impossible.

“Oooooh! Look, it’s Voltron!”

You lost your footing, realizing that the ship was quickly retreating from the fight. You looked back, witnessing the might of the legendary warrior as it reflected a cruiser’s ion cannon to decimate the entire fleet. You were so taken back by the comeback that you hadn’t noticed Lotor re-enter the bridge.

“Are you afraid, little one?”

You turned, seeing no one else on deck except for Lotor. “I’m sorry.”

“I take it that you didn’t hear my orders. We can proceed with our mission to use Voltron to obtain the trans-reality comet.”

“Right. For the ships,” you stammered.

“You’ve been quite distracted lately. I know these past few days have been overwhelming but I need you to focus. ‘Now more than ever’?”

“Lotor, please don’t take this the wrong way but there’s nothing really for me to do _except_ focus. I want to be more useful to you than being…a glorified concubine.”

Lotor glowered. “Who told you that?”

“Throk did but that’s besides the point. I’d rather they insult to me to my face than behind my back. At least then I can do something about it.”

“So, you wish to do more.”

“I _am_ your sword and shield.”

“Don’t compare yourself to a tool.”

“You never intended for me to be a Captain of the Guard in the first place. Arresting traitors has taught me more about my friends’ whereabouts than any other meeting. “

“And what of the prison log?”

“I’ve went through that catalog a thousand times. All I’ve learned is that they’re alive. I need to do more.”

Clearly, the idea didn’t sit well with him. As you threw reasons back and forth, he switched legs and hid his frown behind his hand. You weren’t bargaining for him to release you, no, absolutely not. You simply wanted to be charged in the same manner his generals were.

“Just start me off with something small! Like reclaiming a planet!”

“That is no small manner, (Y/N). It doesn’t take one person to do it.”

“Then send me with your generals! I’ve fought with them so many times already!”

“I won’t argue over this. You are my guard and that’s final.”

“Oh, c’mon! Don’t you think I’ve proven myself strong enough to be on the front lines—”

“I WILL NOT GAMBLE WITH YOUR LIFE.”

You shut your mouth, cowering on your side of the room. Lotor unbared his fangs, sighing heavily and pinching the space between his eyebrows. With his hand, he motioned you to come forward. You slowly approached, gasping when he pulled you into his lap and taking your chin to lock your eyes with his.

“How many times do I have to tell you? You’re too precious to me. I refuse to risk the possibility of you being taken to a place where I cannot follow.”

“Where would I go?” you said as you gently placed your hand over his.

“Away from me,” he whispered.  

Lotor closed his eyes, resting his head against your chest. You wrapped your arms around him, resting your head atop his. His breathing slowed, a purr rumbling from his chest. You ran your fingers through his hair, occasionally stopping your ministrations to kiss his temple.

In the lull of the moment, you spoke softly, “I love you.”

When you felt his breathing stop, you felt instant regret. He lifted his head, eyes wide and dazed.

“Lotor? Did I say something wrong?”

Lotor shook his head frantically, lifting your hips to allow you to straddle his waist properly. He kissed you fervently, communicating a feeling you’ve not felt from him before. The rigor and passion of his kiss made something stir inside of you. But as of now, deciphering that feeling was far from important.

He unknowingly grinded into you, tugging your head to tilt so that he could mark you again. His teeth sunk even deeper than usual, drawing enough blood to trickle down your neck. You whimpered, pulling your skirt so that you could feel him more.

Your hands were placed securely on his shoulders, roaming toward his neck so that you could lift his chin to kiss him again. You made no effort to stop him from undoing the fastenings of your armor. Realizing his imposition, he pulled himself away from you.

The both of you panted, looking into each other’s eyes to come down from your high. The look in his eyes was still incredulity.

You pressed your lips together to fight back tears. “Please say something. Anything.”

Lotor faltered, reaching to wipe the corners of your eyes. “How do I say it?”

You scoffed in disbelief, shaking your head and looking passed him.

“Eyes on me, darling. I’ve not finished. This was not how I wanted to declare our love.”

“Must you always have everything be so calculated?”

Lotor hushed you with another kiss, intertwining your fingers together. “You’re right. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you upset. Of course, I reciprocate your feelings. Because I love you, I’ll…acknowledge your request. For now, when we retrieve it, you’ll guard the trans-reality comet. Nothing more, nothing less. Agreed?”

You gave a small nod, shyly hiding your face into the crook of his neck. “Fine.”

“Good,” he chuckled. “Now, since my declaration was so unsatisfactory, allow me to _show_ you how much I love you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Looks like much of Part II is going to be dialogue, sorry y'all. ;;;


	12. Made to Be Mine [♡]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • Love Me Like You Do – Ellie Goulding  
> • I Get to Love You – Ruelle  
> • Rewrite the Stars (2/4 of the major songs!)
> 
> WARNING: Nasty smutty smut smut :^)

Lotor loved kissing.

Especially in public.

He stole chaste kisses from you in the shadows of hallways, meetings and sometimes, the throne room. He did so from prying eyes, but it was still bold of him.

Actually, bold was an understatement.

Lotor _thrived_ off the adrenaline rush on the possibility of being caught. Maybe he simply enjoyed how he easily could break your resolve with one searing kiss. He knew you much rather preferred having your back pressed against his bed than the walls – where you could whine and beg as loud as you wanted.

No, you have not been fully claimed _yet_. As it turns out, the Galran emperor was never expected to rest. So, having enough or any time had been rather difficult. But each interrupted attempt had only ignited your desire to do more than the last. As luck would have it, Lotor had a breaking point.

You found yourself trapped beneath him, releasing soft gasps as he revisited the marks on your neck. Already marred, the skin was more sensitive than usual. Lotor lifted your hips to meet his to distract you from the pain. But he needed to do more, because your mind was already preoccupied.

“Lotor! I only came to tell you that you’re needed by General Tipol!”

He growled in response, pinning your wrists over your head. “And your emperor needs _you_ now. Shall I remind you whom it is you serve?”

Lotor wasted no time to strip you of your armor. Your breathing hitched when you were dressed down to your underwear. Like this, you were completely vulnerable to his whim, even more so when he was fully dressed.

“I full intend to ravish you from now until morning. Ready your voice.” Pulling your lower half to the edge of the bed, he knelt to settle himself between your legs. He warily ran his claws down your hips to your left ankle, lifting your leg over his shoulder to place feathery kisses from your knee to your inner thigh. Lips still pressed to you, he looked to you with a light in his eyes.

“You’re blushing, darling,” he mused.

The relentless shift between rough and gentle was infuriating. When he held you in such a position, how dare he play innocent. You propped yourself on your elbows, biting on your bottom lip as you swirled your hips. “Please…”

He edged closer, just breathing over your heat.

“My prince,” you whined. “My prince, _please_.”

In an instant, he mouthed your clit, sucking and licking so greedily. His fingers ran along your opening, spreading your slick before pushing in. He chuckled at your cries of pleasure, curling his fingers to intensify the volume of your voice. As he sped the movement of his tongue and fingers, he squeezed your hip to control your writhing. He knew you were close.

He sat up and hovered over you with a sadistic grin. He hushed your displeased whine with a kiss, running his tongue along your bottom lip before meeting yours. You held his face close to yours, returning the kiss with as much want then biting his tongue.

Lotor yelped, pulling away. The look he gave was as if you’ve just stabbed him. You flashed your teeth cheekily, then becoming overwhelmed by his embrace.

“Little vixen!” he laughed.

“My prince is so mean.”

“Do you truly believe that?”

“Of course not. How can I when you make me feel _so good_?” you whispered against his neck, then nibbling his earlobe. Your hand brushed against his groin, then rising to his fastenings. “May I?”

He said nothing, guiding your hands to eagerly help you shed him of each article. Your face flushed when he sat before you, naked. His frame was much larger than you imagined, taut from built muscle. The thought of his body desiring yours clouded your judgement.

You threw yourself to him, drowning him with kisses until he laid back. When he remained under you, you wasted no time to move down to make _your_ mark.

Your actions piqued his curiosity, his excitement made obvious to you by his erection. Like everything else, his member was more than impressive. You carefully put your hand around the base of his member, licking the tip as gently as you could. You locked eyes with him, increasing the intensity of your ministrations when you saw his eyes narrow at you.

“Oh, you’ll regret teasing me, little one.”

“I don’t think so,” you hummed. “I’m not as cruel as you.”

Lotor gasped out, panting when you began to take him into your mouth, moving your hand in sync with your tongue. He reached forward to tangle his fingers in your hair to guide your mouth.

In truth, he was larger than the average male earthing. That was no concern to you. No other man you’ve met could have possibly made you this eager _and_ vindictive in bed. Never before have you been this aroused, this wet – this moment was truly something special to you.

You relished in the sound of his cries of pleasure. Your choice to squeeze your mouth or graze your teeth earned a different sound of your choosing. The ability to control his sounds – you felt powerful.

“(Y/N),” he groaned. He moved his hand to the base of your ear, lifting you. “On your back, darling.”

He gave you no time to move on your own, taking you by the shoulders and laying you on your back. He positioned himself between your legs, caressing your face with one hand and guiding his member to your entrance. You bit your lip, squeezing your thighs together to give you some feeling.

“No, love,” he warned, pushing your legs apart.  You were fixated on your lower halves, but he raised your chin to kiss your forehead.

You wanted to enjoy his sweetness, but your body was betraying you. “Lotor…”

“You’re so much more provocative than I thought. You must really love me if your desire for me is this great. Tell me, (Y/N)—” He slowly rubbed himself against your wetness, kissing alongside your jaw. “—what is it that you want?”

“I want you inside me.” Your eyes brimmed with tears of frustration.

“Just inside?” he whispered huskily.

“Fuck me,” you begged. “I want you to take me—I want to be yours. Please, Lotor!”

With one jerk of his hips, he sheathed most of himself inside you. The stretch was far from painful, with the help of the lubrication of your arousal. Just by the stillness of his hips alone, you felt amazing. 

Now, you were completely taken.

You were completely his.

“You’re crying out so much, my love,” he panted. “Are you all right?”

You shook your head furiously. “No, no. I’m okay, I’m…more than okay. I’m really great.”

He smiled, kissing you and finally moving. He pushed in and out slowly at first, but your whine only signaled him to move only a bit faster. Why was he showing restraint?

“Lotor, you don’t have to be gentle with me. You know I won’t break.”

“I don’t want to hurt you. I’ve…been known to displease from my roughness.”

“And I’m letting you know, I like it that way.” You wrapped your arms around him reassuringly, bucking your hips to allow him to bury himself deeper into you. “Fuck me the way _you_ want to.”

That was all he needed to let go, digging his claws and fangs into your skin to anchor himself as he pounded into you. The sounds that echoed throughout his chambers were so suggestive and lewd, you only wished to hear more of it. You chanted his name like a prayer, losing grip on all reason from heightening pleasure. Lotor’s resolve was all gone too, claiming you with his body and proclamation of words.

He latched his mouth to your breast, biting and shoving himself in you as far he could. Your eyes widened from the sudden pleasure, bringing you to your first climax. You cried out, arching your back and releasing yourself all over him. You felt the sheets soak from underneath, soon becoming so saturated that you made a puddle. You looked to Lotor in horror, but he laughed proudly.

“I want more of it – I want to make you make your glorious body cum for me, over and over.”  

“Yes, please…” You gushed, biting down on your index finger. “You feel so good inside of me, my prince…”

“I’m going to wreck you – drown you in my essence so that the whole empire knows that you belong _to me_.” He brought you to your knees, moving and taking you from behind. Somehow, in this position, he filled you up even more. He wrapped his right arm around you, his hand pushing mercilessly at your clit while the other snaked around your chest to grab at your neck. Without his hold, you would have easily have fallen to your hands.

You turned to kiss him, looking at him with an expression of pure lust. “Cum inside me, my prince,” you offered. “Fill me.”

Lotor growled possessively, tightening his hand around your neck. You felt him smirk against your shoulder. “You want me to _breed you_ , darling? I’ll so gladly fill you with my seed.” He pistoned his cock, giving rise to your second climax. “So lewd of you to soak the sheets. What will my servants say?”

“Let them talk,” you breathed shamelessly. “All I care is about you.” You turned to meet his lips, pushing yourself back to him to encourage his pumping. As much as you wanted this to last, you also wanted to bring him to climax. You reached for his face, caressing his cheek.

“I love you. And only you.”

Lotor let out a guttural moan, squeezing his eyes shut as he quickened the pace of his thrusts. His movements became sloppy, hitting different angles inside of you that made you shout his name.

“Yes, darling. Scream for me—you can do it, take the knot,” he cooed.

When you felt him swell, you gnawed on your bottom lip. He sunk his fangs into your shoulder, steadying your hips to pour his seed deep inside of you. The heat that emanated from your bodies numbed your head, vision blurring from the incredible mix of pain and pleasure. When Lotor gave one last thrust, you came for the third time.

Your body trembled as Lotor continued to empty himself within you. He gently laid the both of you down, your back pressed to his chest. You were still dazed, chest heaving to catch your breath.  Meanwhile, Lotor was completely poised.

He moved your hair over your shoulder, tenderly kissing each mark within sight. “So lovely.”

You looked over your shoulder, meekly nuzzling your nose to his. “No, you.”

The air between you was so serene. Minutes ago, his fingertips left bruises and now they traced your features so delicately. You rested against him in comfortable silence, drifting to sleep from his soothing praises.

“Rest easy now, my love.”

 

* * *

 

You did not expect him to stay.

But you did want him to.

Sharing the morning with Lotor was one of your favorite things, especially when you woke to his impatient kisses.

On his side laid one single Rose of Lyra. You smiled, taking the rose to inhale its fresh scent. Across the room, you saw your garments neatly placed on the center table, next to a tray with breakfast food.

Lotor, ever the prince.

The door opened, revealing Lotor with another tray in hand. You rose with the comforter to your chest. “You stayed?” He placed the tray next to the other one, the new one holding dinner items instead. “How long was I sleeping?”

“Quite a while,” he chuckled. “I don’t blame you. I’m actually impressed you took the full brunt of the heat.”

“I thought you were going to keep going until morning.”

“It’s best that we listen to your body, (Y/N).” He sat beside you, handing you a glass of water. He watched you drink, allowing a few moments to pass before he spoke again. “Much as happened in your absence.”

“Something bad?”

“The opposite. We’ve obtained the trans-reality comet.”

“You did? That’s amazing! So the possibility of other realities _does_ exist.”

“Yes, it is really exciting. I can finally continue my mother’s work.”

“I’m really happy for you, Lotor. Seems like everything’s working out for you. You deserve it.”

“So it is.” Lotor moved to take you into his arms, resting your head against his chest. “Because of you, I’ve learned much. I have you to thank for that…and so much more.”

“I’m glad that there are other realities.”

Lotor looked at you inquisitively. “Why is that, darling?”

“It just confirms that I was meant to find and love you in every life.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay they banged! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:・ﾟ✧


	13. Searching For Release

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • My Love – Sia  
> • Neverland – Hailey Gardiner  
> • Safe & Sound - Kina Grannis 
> 
> Thank you so much for the kudos, everyone! ToT <3

The creation of the Sincline ships was Lotor’s top priority. He worked his robotic sentries day and night, breaking and reassembling each piece of the comet. In just two movements, the arms had been assembled and ready for flight.  Usually, it was Axca who’d been at your side to direct the sentries, but strange activity interrupted the progression of today’s tasks.

You returned to your duties as Captain of the Guard, standing by Lotor on the bridge. After three attempts, Lotor finally was able to give the orders to identify the anomaly that’s been disturbing the ship.

“It _is_ a Galra fighter,” Axca said.

“Let’s invite our guest aboard.”

Once the fighter was taken, Zethrid forcibly pried the cockpit open to drag its pilot out. “Look who it is. General Raht.” She carelessly threw him at Lotor’s feet, the rest of the generals pointing their guns at him.

“Who sent you?” Lotor hissed.

“The empire,” he said, only to be kicked in the face by Ezor’s boot.

“Wrong answer,” she said.

“You command armies in the Jibul sector,” you stated. “All the prisoners you have are taken by Haggar to have experiments performed on them. You’re her biggest supplier of bodies.”

“So, you’ve been charged by the witch herself.”  Lotor narrowed his eyes. Drew his sword, slowly driving it through Raht’s chest. “You’ve made the mistake of pledging your loyalty to her than protecting the royal family. For that, I hereby sentence you to death.”

You shut your eyes, but you could still hear the fall of Raht’s lifeless body.

"That was close," Zethrid said. "If we let Raht free, he would've told Haggar about the Proto Project."

Lotor bared his fangs. "Vile witch. I'll confront her deceit myself." 

 

* * *

 

You stood before the last piece of the comet, the whirring sounds of power tools drowning the sound of your own thoughts. Construction was so loud, you couldn’t hear the footsteps behind you.

“Oh, Lotor. How did it go?"

"I've taken care of it. Nothing to worry about. I've seen you admiring the comet. It's beautiful, no?" 

"Yeah. Not as beautiful as Planet Lyra, though.”

“Yes.” He smiled fondly at the memory. “You’ve impressed us all today with your hidden knowledge. I don’t believe I’ve spoken to you about the Jibul sector.

“That’s…where we were taken after they found us on Kerberos. I can’t forget that arm. He’s choked so many innocent people.”

"You won't ever witness that again. I'll never let that witch touch you." 

No matter how many enemies had fallen before your feet, you could never get used to the sight of piercing flesh or decapitated bodies. When you refused to carry out that part of your job description, Ezor and Zethrid did it for you in…creative ways. You were grateful no human made an enemy of Lotor to meet such a fate. Then, a sudden thought jogged into your mind.

_“No Alteans have survived Emperor Zarkon’s hand.”_

Was Earth still safe?

“Lotor, can I ask you something?”

“Anything, my darling.”

“When we met, you said taking me would protect my planet. Now that you’re acting as emperor…would it be safer or more dangerous to officially put Earth under the empire’s protection?”

Lotor crossed his arms in thought. “…Anything the Galra has affiliation toward is already in great risk. It’s better to be hidden in the shadows than out in the open for all to see.”

“It took us months to get to Keberos. It only takes an hour or two to travel sector to sector. What if they’ve already taken it?”

“By now, we would’ve known. Trust me, (Y/N). Earth is safe.”

Your heart still wavered. You’ve gotten this far by trusting Lotor – why should this be any different?  

“I have something for you.” Lotor stood before you, taking your hand into his. Taking your left hand, slipping a ring onto your finger.

Your jaw dropped, anxiously looking back and forth from him to the stone. “Lotor, this is—”

“I remember the conversation we’ve had about Earth customs between lovers. I’ve had a piece of the comet melted down to the shape you’ve described. Do I have it correct?”

“Yes,” you said with astonishment. “But why?”

Lotor opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out. He struggled to collect his thoughts only to lower his ears, mortified. “Oh dear, this…this is embarrassing, I’m at a loss for words.”

“That’s a first,” you laughed. “But I think I understand what you’re trying to say.”

“You’ve opened my heart. And in doing so, I’ve lost my mind.” He kissed the top of your hand, gazing at you lovingly. “(Y/N) Sanda, allow me to _show_ you my devotion for as long as we both shall live.”

“Are you asking me to—”

“Yes, love. I wish for no other to remain at my side. Make me proud today; I know you have the potential to rule with an iron fist.”   

 

* * *

 

You hadn't given him an answer.

Being Lotor's paramour was one thing, but  _empress_? Of a civilization thousands of years older than you? 

You loved him, but this was too much. You haven't even roamed the empire freely on your own yet. But this was the day: your first mission _away_ from Lotor. Uncanny that your destination was in the Ulippa System, Throk’s post – also your first solo arrest. But now the stakes were higher, and you couldn’t be more excited. You had the chance at independence.  

Lotor had learned that a piece of an Altean teludav had been stored away in the Ulippa System. While the generals worked to open the storage roof, you were to watch over the Sincline’s first ship, hidden away on a standard Galra cruiser. The plan was simple enough. If anyone dared to board the cruiser, Zethrid encouraged you to ‘punch the living qualiruun out of them’.

After blasting the gates down, Axca landed the cruiser on the boarding dock. The four of them moved fast, leaving you to do nothing but wait.

Several doboshes passed.

…

So far, so good.

You checked the security cameras, jumping channel to channel. Your eyes widened when you saw five figures on the launch bay.

“The Paladins of Volton…?!” They surrounded the ship – of course they did. By their size, you could tell they weren’t Galran. That would make apprehending them even easier.

You quickly made your way there, watching the live feed from your wrist every so often to watch their movements. They made no suspicious movement other than circling around one another. Formulating a plan, no doubt.

You entered the bay, wasting no time to jump and land your fist on the ground. The seismic effect of your punch made them fall to the ground. You activated the quintessence in your legs, now focusing on speed rather than strength. If your intention was to apprehend all five of them _alive_ , it was wise to use restraint.

The first on their feet was the Red Paladin. Like the lion, his spirit was fiery. You could only defend against the constant jabs and swings of his sword. Disarming their bayards would be the best way to start. The Paladin went for your chest, and like Lotor, you caught his blade between your hands. You both pushed to one another, lifting your chin to glare up at him.

Wait.

No, it couldn’t be—

“(Y/N)?!”

“Keith?!”

“Keith, watch out!”

“Lance, wait!”

You looked over your shoulder, spotting the end of the Blue Paladin’s bayard pointed at you. He made no hesitation to fire not once but twice, making everything go in slow motion. The first bullet flew straight toward you, cracking the seam of your helmet and breaking it apart. An incessant screech was the last thing you heard before the second shot through your chest.

 

* * *

 

_“(Y/N), my darling, wake up.”_

Where are you?

_“Stand and fight. You must.”_

Not without you.

_“I love you.”_

 You jerked forward with a gasp, your heart racing painfully fast. You wanted to run, but the cuff around your wrist held you back. You flexed, bring your arm forward to break through the chain.

“(Y/N).”

Somehow, your heart stopped. What cruel, sick being would think to play with your heart like this?

“(Y/N).”

No, you couldn’t. Don’t. Don’t turn around. You’ve had far too many delusions of grandeur. Why now of all times would they come back?

“(Y/N), I know you’re scared. Please, calm down.”

It can’t be, this felt all too real.

You hesitated, slowly looking over your shoulder.

“…Shiro…?!”

“Yeah, it’s me.”

You reached to brush your fingers against his face. You needed to make sure he was real. When you made contact, you threw your arms around him, tears staining his shoulder. 

“Oh my god, Shiro! Thank god, you’re alive!” you sobbed.

The man before you wasn’t just your friend, he was _family_. The only family you had in this godforsaken universe.

Shiro returned the embrace, squeezing you with a strength that matched your own.

“I’m so glad you’re safe.”  

You held his face in your hands, laughing through your tears of joy. Your vision was blurry from crying, but yes, Takashi Shirogane was right in front of you. Alive. Breathing. Smiling.

“Where’s Matt? And Commander Holt?” you asked.

“I take it they weren’t with you either. But don’t worry, we’ll find them.”

“They’re alive. I know, I checked the Galra prisoner logs. But how the hell did you escape?”

 “A rebel broke me out of a Galra lab. Ulaz of The Blade of Marmora. It’s a long story. I’m a Paladin of Voltron. Or, I was. I promise I’ll explain everything later. But what matters now is that you’re safe. You’re with Voltron.”

“Voltron? No, wait, that can’t be I—Lotor! I need to be with Lotor.” In a daze, you brought your feet over the bed but when you tried to stand, the panic overwhelmed your entire being.

Shiro caught you, helping you back onto the bed. “Whoa! (Y/N), what are you talking about?”

“Where’s Lotor?”

“Don’t worry, you’re safe now. _Away_ from Lotor.”

“NO! This is wrong – this is all wrong. I need to be with him,” you rambled hysterically. “He needs to know I’m okay!”

“I’m not following. The Paladins _saved_ you. You were a prisoner of the Galra.”

“I _was_ a prisoner of the Galra. Now I’m Lotor’s Captain of the Guard.”

Shiro’s expression hardened, firmly placing his hands on your shoulders. “(Y/N), don’t be crazy. You know what they’re capable of. Did you know what they did to you? What they did to _me_?”

“Lotor saved my life,” you said firmly. “He’s not like the other Galra. Without him, I wouldn’t even be here.”

“If it weren’t for the Galra _none_ of us would be here. Voltron’s been working to save the universe from their tyranny. And all this time you were helping them?!” he seethed. “I can’t believe you, you wanted to be a doctor! Didn't you make a promise to save lives?”

“Shiro, you’re not listening. Please, try to understand.” You waved your hands to calm him, but the shine of the ring on your left hand caught his eye.

“(Y/N)…what’s going on?”

“Shiro—”

“Unless you hid your engagement from me, care to explain why you have _that_ on your finger?”

“Just listen,” you said slowly. “I’ve already told you. Lotor saved my life. He’s protected me in more ways than I even know. He’s different from his father, he values life and freedom. Because of him, I’ve seen the Galra in a different light.”

Shiro released his fists, sighing and taking a seat beside you. “All right, I believe you. He saved your life. I owe him that much. But you’re going to have to convince the princess you weren’t working for Zarkon.”

“‘Princess’?”

“Princess Allura of Altea. As of now, you’re Voltron’s prisoner. You were wearing Galran armor, what was she supposed to think? You’re lucky the entire team knew who you were.”

“I thought all the Alteans were dead?”

“The Castle of Lions was the only piece that survived, Allura with it. It’s Voltron’s home base.”

“Hold on—back up. _The entire team_?” You glowered, crossing your arms. “Why’s Keith here and not on Earth?”

“That’s…also a long story.” Shiro winced, looking across to the room and motioning someone to leave. You knew that look. It was the same look Shiro gave Keith when they stole the lollipops from the office receptionist.

“Keith,” you called. “Get back in here.”  He tip-toed to you guiltily. He’s grown quite a bit since you’ve last saw him, but his eyes were still big and expressive. “I know why Shiro’s here, but why are _you_ here?”

“Look, it wasn’t my fault! If Lance wasn’t the one piloting the Blue Lion, we’d still all be on Earth!”

“Lance?”

“Uh, McClain. Hunk Garret, and Katie Holt. They’re the Paladins of Voltron,” Shiro said.  

“ _Veronica’s_ brother?! And Commander Holt’s _daughter_?!” you yelled. “Shiro, they’re cadets! Why are they fighting on the front lines of an intergalactic war?”

“Okay, now it’s your turn to listen to me. After I escaped, somehow, I managed to make my way back to Earth. That’s where the Blue Lion was and it flew all of us to the Castle of Lions on Planet Arus. That’s when we met Princess Allura to pilot the lions. These cadets were _chosen_ by the Voltron Lions. Therefore, they’re now the Defenders of the Universe.”

“We’re trying to stop the Galra from taking over the Universe,” Keith added. “With Zarkon gone, it’ll be easier to stop the tyranny.”

“But not all Galra are bad,” you said quietly.

Keith and Shiro looked at each other awkwardly. You snorted. The gesture reminded you of Eylek and Groven.

“Look, I’m sure your story is just as long, but you need to rest. We’ll come back and tell you everything,” Shiro said. “We’ll bring food too.”

“Don’t worry. Shiro won’t be the one cooking!” Keith laughed.

You watched them leave, waving until they closed the door.

Shiro was alive.

And an ally of Voltron, the enemy of the empire. An enemy of Lotor.

You wished you could say it was good to be back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I recommend watching the respective episodes of each chapter ;;; it really helps with filling the canon gaps.


	14. Come Back Home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • Hurts Like Hell – Fleurie  
> • I Don’t Wanna Live Forever – ZAYN/Taylor Swift  
> • What About Us – P!nk

“Are you ready?” Shiro asked.

“As ready as I’ll ever be.”

Shiro took your arm, escorting you to the castle’s bridge. Allura stood dead center with the Paladins on each side. You didn’t recognize the Altean man, but his disgruntled expression wasn’t welcoming either.

Allura stepped forward, her glare unbroken by yours. “(Y/N) Sanda. You come before us accused with conspiring with the Galra – the universe’s known worst enemy. What do you have to say for yourself?”

“I did nothing wrong.”

“You guarded the ship made from the trans-reality comet, wearing the same colors as Lotor’s generals. Then you were fully aware that those ships would allow him to reap an unlimited amount of quintessence?”

“Yes, for peace. It’ll end the war.”

“ _Voltron_ will end the war. The Galra have used quintessence for weapons and means of subjugation on innocent people. You’re forgiving tyranny by supporting Lotor.”

“No, you’re wrong! Trust me, princess. No one knows about their greed for quintessence more than I do. But Lotor saved my life. I’ve worked alongside him—he’s different than his father.”

“Why are you so certain he didn’t have the intention of deceiving you?”

“I’m telling you, he saved my life. Are the Galra known to do that? After the Kerberos mission, they separated us. They took me to their research facility as a test subject for the Proto Project. For centuries, they’ve experimenting with quintessence to increase strength and lifespan. That’s how Zarkon managed to reign for 10,000 years. What the Proto Project wanted to do was infuse quintessence into slaves without compromising their mental stability. They wanted to make super soldiers for their armies.”

“And where are the other subjects?”

“I was…the only one who survived,” you said bitterly.  

The room fell silent, the young paladins looking to one another then to Allura.

“It is only because the Paladins know you that I may give the benefit of the doubt…however…”

“That doesn’t mean we trust him,” Keith finished. “We can’t let go you back to Lotor.”

“So what, you’re going to keep me captive?” you exclaimed in disbelief. “You have to let me go, Lotor won’t hesitate to come back for me. He’ll send _fleets_. You all won’t stand a chance against his rage.”

“If that were the case, he would’ve done that a long time ago, with or without you,” Pidge noted.

“Uhh not to be rude, but why would he send fleets for a soldier?” Lance asked.

You quickly hid your left hand behind your right. You could practically _feel_ them staring at you. “I—”

“It’s because she’s his bodyguard. Takes a lot of trust to get that title right, (Y/N)?” Keith asked.

You smiled at him, nodding in gratitude.  

“Plus, she’s freakishly strong now so I don’t blame him for wanting her on his side,” Hunk said.

“As far as Lotor knows, we’re keeping her prisoner. Sooner or later, he’s going to go after us to get her back. Until then, we can decide our next move,” Shiro stated.

“You’re going to use me as a bargaining chip? Shiro!”

“I know how it sounds, but it could be a way to end this war.”

“He’s a reasonable man, _just talk to him_ ,” you urged. “He wants the same thing as all of you.”

“We’ll be putting the entire universe in jeopardy if we are to put all our time and energy into this,” Allura said. “I’m sorry, (Y/N). But it is our best option.”

This entire situation was a convoluted mess. You were caught between the crossfire of your lover and your family – except the scale was much more problematic. On one hand, Voltron was the symbolic sign of peace. On the other, Lotor worked in the shadows. Both had the obligation to bring peace and stability to the empire.

“All I have to do is just wait?” you asked.

_Wait until I see Lotor again?_

“We won’t keep you prisoner,” Allura promised. “Just until Lotor makes a move. You’ll be free to roam the Castle to your leisure.”

“It’s been awhile since I had a check-up! Gotta say, the healing pods don’t really check every nook and cranny,” Lance said with a grin. Pidge kicked him after that comment.

“Hey, that sounds like a good idea,” Shiro said. “You could pass the time by taking a look at all of us. Make sure everything’s working out?”

“Back to being a doctor? I guess I could. If I had the right equipment.”

“Coran can show you the infirmary,” Allura suggested. The Altean man stepped forward with a jolly skip.

“I sure could! This would be a great time to learn more on earthling biology!”

You agreed. It'd be better than just...waiting around for awhile. 

The ambiance of the Castle was very different than Lotor’s cruiser. You grew comfortable on his ship, but that took time. This place was already so light and inviting.

“Here we are, the Castle of Lions’ infirmary! Feel free to take a look around and familiarize yourself with the equipment. I’m sure you’re versed with healing pods?”

In the just few minutes of knowing him, you enjoyed Coran. He had a friendly charisma that reminded you of the older nurses you’ve worked with at the Garrison.

“Not exactly,” you admitted with a smile. “It’s been awhile since I’ve worked in this environment.”

“Ah, right. Fightin’ for the Galra. Well, as my grandpappy would say, ‘Personal profession is like riding a ralpoyn socket! You never really forget.’ I’m sure it’ll come back to you within the varga!”

You giggled. You had no idea what that was.

“Thanks, Coran.”

 

* * *

 

“Lance, we’ve talked about this. Your hand cramping is from over-excessive gaming. It’s carpal tunnel.”

“Hunk, sweetie, you’re allergic to selefon leaves. That’s why you’re itching.”

“Frequent migraines, chapped lips, irritation. Pidge, these are all symptoms of dehydration.”

“Keith, you need to shower.”

Allura was right. The Paladins _did_ trust you. A lot more than you expected. As a doctor, you had no authority to judge their habits. As a doctor in space, you could scold them as much as you like. Still, Allura and Coran did a good job taking care of all of them.

Your next patient was Shiro and, as always, he was fit as a fiddle. Despite everything he’s gone through, he was healthier than ever. But you were not licensed nor trained to treat mental health professionally. All you could do was be his friend and listen.

“A robotic arm, huh?” You ran your hand along his forearm, studying its functionality and detail. “No matter how you look at it, it’s not for them to decide what’s right for us.”

“Even when I won, they always tried to find ways to improve it. I’ve…killed so many with this thing.”

“You can’t keep dwelling on the past. We can only move forward from here.”

“That’s exactly what I keep telling the Paladins,” he chuckled. “They’re much livelier now that you’re here. You’ve given Pidge a lot of hope.”

“Really? That’s good to hear. Gotta say, it feels good to be surrounded by humans again.”

“So,” he began, raising an eyebrow. “You and Lotor, huh?”

“Don’t. I know what you’re going to say—”

“Did you both…?”

“I am _not_ going to have this conversation with you.”  

“I don’t see you in a year and the next thing I know, you’re engaged to an alien warlord! Things like this don’t just happen (Y/N). Off the record, does he treat you right?”

“ _This_ is why I stopped going to you for guy stuff, Shiro! I’m an adult, you’re too involved in my business.”

“This business involves you and the bad guy.”

“You said this is off record! And to you, every guy I’m with is a bad guy.”

Shiro rolled his eyes, laying back on the examination table as you turned to throw your gloves in the trash. It was just like him to pry. Back in the garrison, he thought it would be fair to listen to your relationship problems as you did for him. The only difference is that only he would be the one to initiate conversation on _your_ problems.

He watched your back as you cleaned off the counters, eyeing your left hand. “He loves you, doesn’t he?”

You paused, your back still turned.

“I’ve never heard of the Galra doing anything like that. Even with their own kind. I didn’t they were capable. Since he’s the prince, I guess he asked you with sincerity.”

“Yeah,” you whispered. It had only been two days, but you could practically feel your heart being torn from your chest at the thought of your separation.

“For your sake, I really hope he does come back for you.”

 

* * *

 

One week.

It went by fast, especially with how preoccupied you’ve been with upkeeping the Paladins’ health. The stories you’ve shared with one another had lessened the feeling of loneliness. You were glad to hear how much good they’ve accomplished within the last year. They were not as efficient as Lotor, but they succeeded missions with heart.

One week, and still no Lotor.

 

* * *

 

Two weeks.

You’ve been appointed as the Paladins’ primary doctor. All issues concerning their health were to be run by you before resorting to the powers of the healing pod. Coran had given you full authority of the infirmary in exchange for lessons about human anatomy.

You’ve gotten used to Keith and Lance’s bickering, Coran’s unrecognizable references, and Pidge and Hunk’s tech talk. Shiro’s interest in you and Lotor was insufferable. Allura was your only saving grace.

Two weeks, and still no Lotor.

 

* * *

 

One month.

Allura had suggested that you oversee the health of the civilians of allying planets. This gave you the motivation to learn more so that you could properly cater to their particular, varying body systems. Every so often, you’d accompany her in the Blue Lion to visit the allying planets.

From their intel, no one has heard or seen from Emperor Pro-Tem Lotor. The Galra remain vigilant of their territories and continue to encroach on vulnerable planets.

One month, and still no Lotor.

 

* * *

 

Two months.

Along with their regular physicals, Shiro suggested that you assist the Paladins in their training. Since you were trained with Galran officers, they needed to fight something a bit more unpredictable than the bots. Without guidance from Lotor’s subordinates, you had a hard time holding back your strength. But much to your surprise, they preferred you went all out.

You and Coran spent the next few weeks repairing the training deck’s walls from when Lance ducked from your punch. Lotor would’ve been proud.

But, much to your heart wrenching disappointment – two months, and still no Lotor.

 

* * *

 

Three months.

You had been invited to join the Paladins’ briefings. Your input of your knowledge on Galran activity had greatly contributed to the expansion of the rebellion’s map. You worked closely with the Balmerans to produce herbal remedies and ointments to heal injuries. You wouldn’t dare to think of the Rose of Lyra – just looking at your pendant brought sheer agony to your heart.

Three months, and Lotor was nowhere to be found.

 

* * *

 

Six months.

The nights you’ve spent alone were painful and miserable. Not once have you passed a night without sobbing your heart out. If you did, it was because there were no tears left. You nestled yourself into a ball, tightly wrapping your comforter around you to feign your memory of Lotor’s embrace.

Your throat tightened, the dryness in your mouth evident in the smallness of your voice.

“You said you’d never hurt me…”

It had been six months.

He never came for you.


	15. To the Lions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • Irrelevant – Lauren Aquilina  
> • The Great Divide (The Crash Cove Remix) – Rebecca Black  
> • Believer – Imagine Dragons

 “Oh, Keith! You’re back, good. I wanted to give this to you. More uroxen gels.”

When you handed the small bag to him, he wore a sullen expression. Judging from the direction he came from, he had another spat with Shiro.

“What happened? Are you okay?”

 “I’m fine. Thanks for this. It helps when I land from high places.”

“Keith…”

“I have to get to the Fimm System. I’ll see you later.”

You knew Keith was overwhelmed. The stress of his duties as the Black Paladin _and_ a member of the Blade of Marmora was too much. Shiro’s irritability didn’t help either, so he often went to you for consolation. Even before you learned of Keith’s ancestry, your reputation as a Galra apologist made it easier for him to confide in you.

You entered the bridge, watching Shiro arrange ships on the monitor. Unlike before, you couldn’t read him. The furrow of his brow and the scowl on his lip didn’t remind you of the Shiro you once knew. Of course, you didn’t blame him. Recent turn of events has changed you too.

“You don’t have to be so hard on him,” you said.

“I have to. He’s not acknowledging the compromise we had. Voltron needs him more.”

“With the Blades, he finally has a sense of belonging. You can’t blame him for wanting to prove himself there more. Why don’t you fly the Black Lion?”

“I already told you—it’s chosen him. Keith’s always been destined for greatness. He just needs to meet it halfway.”

There was only so much you could say. Shiro was a great leader, there was no doubt about that. People followed his orders willingly because they believed in him. But lately, the rebellion had been his utmost priority, and sometimes it overrode his friends’ feelings.

You turned a heel to return to the infirmary, but Shiro’s next words made you stop.

“I’ve spoken with Keith about his latest mission. He thinks it may be related to Lotor.”

“…So?”

“You know why Keith’s been so stubborn about finding Lotor.”

“I know.”

“(Y/N), you need to stop worrying over him. It’s affecting Keith and in turn, it’s affecting the team. I know it hurts, but you need to move on. Just like Lotor has.”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” you spat, storming out of the bridge.

Like hell you would let him say the last word.  

 

* * *

 

In truth, the Paladins had given you more freedom than Lotor ever did. With your knowledge in medicine and Galran tactics, you were an invaluable ally to the rebellion. You’ve healed hundreds of people, changing their lives for the better so that they could face their oppressors side by side – the very empire you’ve once served.

Lotor had severely misjudged you. The iron fist he forged would always be a velvet glove. 

But you’d be damned if you truly believed that Lotor had abandoned you.

Allura and Shiro had agreed that you’d be the best person to oversee the coalition’s medical supplies. They’ve trusted you with the executive ability to choose the most appropriate supplies, a responsibility you found honorable.

After loading the supplies from Balmera, you were aboard the head cargo ship piloted by Olia—one of the rebellion’s captains. This was to be a simple expedition to deliver the supplies through the Harmonium Quadrant to Olkarion.

“We should be arriving to Olkarion in two vargas. Do the Galra typically patrol these areas?” Olia asked you.

“Since Voltron has liberated a third of this quadrant, I don’t see why’d they care to come back here. But we’re also bordering the Leymund System. Victory or death is still an option, even if the odds don’t favor their side. It’s a dice roll, so we’ll have to stay on guard.”

“Looks like she’s right,” one of the pilots spoke. “We’ve got a Galra cruiser coming in from the west!”

“The Leymund System,” you groaned. You rushed to the control panel, activating a distress signal to the Castle of Lions. You hailed a frequency, reaching Pidge through your modified wrist device. “Pidge? Anyone, can you hear me?”

A static sounded. “(Y/N)! Coran got your distress signal. What’s going on?”

“There’s too many battle cruisers! They keep calling for backup. At this rate, the supply ships will never make it to Olkarion!”

 “We’re on our way!”

The convoys had been pacified, the strength of the cruisers’ trajectory beam too powerful to give your ships a fighting chance. You had faith in the Paladins, but this was cutting it extremely close. Without the Black Lion – you were all powerless.

If you’d been captured, would it even be Lotor who would decide your fate? Would he even care?

No.

“I’m not going to let him get the best of me,” you said through clenched teeth.

“What’re you doing?!” Olia shouted.

“What I can!”

You put on your helmet then grabbed an emergency cable, tying it around your waist and exiting the ship. You forced yourself onto the ship’s keel, planting your feet to its surface. You sent the quintessence in your core out to your arms and legs, resisting the beam as much as you could. Every muscle tightened, a shout escaping you as you pulled with all your strength.

Suddenly, you were able to pull with ease, jerking the ship backward. Distant explosions set off, revealing the Black Lion at the source.

“(Y/N)! You better get back on the ship!” Olia ordered.  “They’re going to form Voltron!”

You scrambled your way back inside, watching Voltron destroy the fleet with ease. This victory was not only one for the rebellion, but one for your heart. You had decided: Lotor will no longer be your driving force.

 

* * *

 

“Don’t tell me this was an accident. This is the final straw, (Y/N). Keith _has_ to face the consequences.”

“Let them hear him out, at least!” you exclaimed. You took Shiro’s wrist, preventing him from storming to the bridge. “This is the closest thing he has to a family. You know he relies on you to be the voice of reason.”

Shiro sighed heavily, running his fingers through his white fringe. “C’mon. Let’s hurry and join the others.”

Everyone had a right to be upset. You and the refugees had almost been taken. Were you lenient on the situation because it was Keith, or was it because you’ve had moment of self-actualization?

“You keep saying you’re sorry but your actions say otherwise,” Allura scolded. “Do you realize your absence put the team in jeopardy?”

“And not just the team, the refugees as well,” Lance said.

“As a matter of fact, the entire quadrant was in danger!” Pidge added.

Conflict resolution was not your forte. All you could do was watch and listen to the scene unfold before you. So far, Keith had been holding up well.

“The Blades have been making real headway tracking the source of this new quintessence. They’ve been able to piece together a large network of hidden supply lines that have been secretly transporting it for who knows how long. And there’s good reason to believe it could lead us directly to Lotor.”

Again.

No, conceal it.

“A mission is being planned to infiltrate the supply line.  It could take weeks, maybe months to pull off, but if there is a chance…we have—I have to take it. I need to be on that mission.”

You watched Shiro’s expression, relieved when he placed his hand on Keith’s shoulder, the rest of the team following suit to supportively embrace him and send him off.

Before Keith made his final leave from the Castle, you rushed behind him.

“Keith!”

“(Y/N)? Did I forget something?”

“No, no. Listen, about this new quintessence, do you have a sample of it?”

“No. We only got a reading of it. Why?”

“If it’s related to Lotor, I have a good reason to believe that I may have something to do with it. He tested on me. I’m not sure if it’ s the same type of quintessence, though.”

“Until we know for sure, try to stay hidden. No one knows about your history with Lotor and the team wants to keep it that way.”

“I know. But if I can ask one more thing—what was the network’s starting point?”

“The Rajex System.”

 

* * *

 

Piece by piece, things had been falling together. What gaps of knowledge you’ve had were suddenly being fulfilled. The Blades were right—this new discovery had Lotor written all over it. You’ve told the team everything you knew about the empire, except for _that_. Lotor never extracted your quintessence, so why would the shipments be originating from the Rajex system? Was this even something worth telling the Paladins?

Your heart and mind were distracted. Several glass beakers had been dropped because of the carelessness of your actions. You intended to finish this mixture by the end of the day, but you hadn’t even started grinding the ingredients. Another beaker slipped from your hands when the Green Lion entered the Olkarion atmosphere.

You cleaned the last bits of glass shards, then joining the Paladins outside to greet Pidge. A smile crept on your face when you saw a familiar face exit the lion.

“He’s muscular now.”  

“I knew she would find him,” Shiro said.

The group parted, revealing you both.  “Shiro…? (Y/N)…?”

“Matt.” Your grin was bright, opening your arms to embrace him.

Shiro did the same soon after. “Pidge never gave up on finding you.”

“Yeah, she can be pretty stubborn at times.”

“And I want you to know that all of us will help you find your father.”

“He’s alive,” you reassured. “You have my word on that.”

“Thanks,” he sighed gratefully.

 

* * *

 

Of course, you expected Pidge to be the one to flaunt her accomplishments to Matt. A physical examination could always be performed later. So, you resumed your attempts at finishing your medicinal remedy. After grinding the plants to a dust, you carefully poured the contents into the last beaker. However, the tranquility of your work was interrupted by Hunk’s voice.

“(Y/N)! Do you mind reading something for us?”

“Yes, Hunk,” you replied. You could never be mad at him. “Is it Galran?”

“Yeah, it’s pretty important. Practically all of Zarkon’s troops are heading toward one direction.”

“ _Zarkon_?” You followed Hunk, finding Matt and Pidge with their noses pressed to a monitor. “Zarkon’s alive?”

“Yeah! And mad too. Check out where the ships are going,” Pidge said.

Your eyes scanned the monitor, deciphering each piece of information. “Burjon Quadrant…Neyban Sector…?! That’s—that’s Lotor’s ship!”

 

* * *

 

You and the others rushed to the bridge, joining the rest of the team.

“We have to help,” Allura responded.

“I don’t like it. We should be gathering intelligence not diving into a fight without knowing why—especially now that we know Zarkon is alive,” Shiro said.  

“Zarkon hates Lotor! The only reason he’d be attacking is because Lotor’s threatening the empire. There’s no question about it, _we have to help him_!” you cried.

“(Y/N), it’s too risky. Too many Galra cruisers are heading there.”

“Allura, _please_!”

“We could go check it out,” Pidge suggested.

Lance titled his head. “I think they’d probably notice us.”

“Not if we’re cloaked!”

“You have cloaking?! Who are you?” Matt gushed.

Your heart was beating too fast to think. His life was in danger. If you made no effort to try to save him, then all you’ve worked for would’ve been for naught. You convinced yourself saving Lotor was Voltron philosophy, not a personal wish.

“Let’s get to the lions. (Y/N), stay here with Coran.”

“What? You’re kidding. I’m _going_.”

“You’re no longer Lotor’s guard. You’re Voltron’s medic. It’s safer for you to stay here.”

You sighed.

Don’t be swayed by Lotor’s name.

“…yes, sir,” you muttered begrudgingly.  

Still, you couldn’t help yourself. After several months, this is the closest you’ve been to him. No calls, no attempts at rescue…just by sheer chance, the Paladins managed to find him. He didn’t want to be found.

“Coran, can you zoom in on the fight?”

“I can try, but the quality of the image won’t be as great if we zero in on the details.”

“Anything is fine—just please, hurry!”

You swore Lotor was the bane of your existence. When you witnessed the cruisers firing your old home, you lost all feeling. The quality wasn’t too terrible. You could still make out the Sincline’s ships emerge from the hull.

_Thank god._

“Thank the ancients. Voltron escaped just in time. Hmm? Hold on—we’re receiving a transmission!”

“Play it.”

“Attention, citizens of the Galra empire—”

No mistake. That was Zarkon’s voice.

“—From this day forward, my son Lotor is to be regarded as a fugitive criminal of the empire. All citizens are authorized to use deadly force to stop him or any of his soldiers. I repeat, Prince Lotor is an enemy of the state. Engage with extreme prejudice. Kill on sight.”

You fell to your knees. Tears blurred your vision. Your mind became blank. Coran’s voice drowned in the ringing of your ears.

There was no place for him in this universe.

Except the refuge in your heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow Lotor doesn't deserve MC tbh :^)


	16. All the King's Horses

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • The Day Has Come – X-Ray Dog  
> • Live Like Legends – Ruelle  
> • All the King’s Horses – Karmina

He’d done it.  Lotor provoked Zarkon’s rage. The only thing you feared more than Lotor’s death was Zarkon’s fury and now, both were a reality. Was this inevitable? If he had predicted this, then perhaps Voltron’s agency was a fortunate coincidence. Lotor could have at least told you of his plans to give you a peace of mind.

But you persevered. Just as Voltron prioritized the coalition, you were fixated on your work. As the number of liberated planets grew, so did the demand for medical supplies. Producing mass quantities of ointments and pills was tiring. That’s why you’d take all the help you could get.

“Man, this stuff is sticky!”

“Lance, that’s why I handed you a pair of gloves,” you said. His little outbursts entertained you enough to keep you awake. “It’s sticky and it stains. Your fingers are going to be red for a while.”

“Ugh. As if I need another thing to remind me of him.”

You beamed at his pout. “I know who you’re thinking of. I miss him too.”

“I _do not_ miss him!”

You laughed. “Anyway, I really appreciate you taking the time to help me.”

“Of course! I know how hard you’ve been working so it’s the least I could do. You’re part of the team too, (Y/N).”

“You’re sweet. Those Voltron events must be tiring. You don’t wanna go ahead and nap?”

“Nah! I’m actually bummed they’re over.”

“Lance, (Y/N),” Allura said over the intercom. “Please report to the bridge.”

 

* * *

 

This meeting was to be the culmination of everything you worked for. Zarkon’s fixation on eliminating Lotor had left the empire vulnerable, giving Voltron the opportunity to strike. The remainder of Galran-inhabited planets toward the west of the empire could easily be retaken by the coalition forces.

“The Blades have informed us of two Galra defense systems coming online called zaiforge canons. Now, these canons can strike any target within our combat theater. The first, in high-orbit around the planet Teq, will be attacked by coalition air forces led by Matt and Captain Olia. Kolivan will lead a Marmoran strike team against the second cannon, located on the surface of Senfama, which is vulnerable to a covert ground attack. Which is exactly why (Y/N) will be going with them. We intend to take control of these cannons and use Zarkon’s firepower against him.”

You looked at Shiro quizzically.  “You don’t want me with the medical convoys?”

“Having someone with a strength of your caliber will hasten the progression of the plan,” Kolivan said from the monitor.

“If muscle’s want you want, muscle’s what you’re gonna get,” you said with a cheeky grin, flexing your right bicep.

“Once the coalition forces and Blades neutralize these targets,” Shiro continued, “Galra defenses will be weakened, allowing us to take down the remaining Galra-occupied planets in this area. While our forces are taking control of the planets, Naxzela will already be under attack.”

“By whom?”

“Voltron.”

 

* * *

 

You reached the inside of a storage bin, digging until your felt a hard edge. Grabbing it, you pulled out your armor. You held it up in front of you and sighed at the memories it held. The last time you wore it, you were pledged to Lotor. Now, you were preparing for an attack against the empire. This plan would bring you one step closer to victory against Zarkon and ensuring Lotor’s safety.

“(Y/N),” Keith said from the other side of your door. “You ready?”

“Uh yeah, come in.” You pressed a button on your hip, making the suit air-tight.

Keith eyed your form, chuckling a bit. “I don’t think I’ll ever get used to seeing you in that.”

“Looks bad?”

“No. But you’re scarier in the white coat.”

You rolled your eyes and locked your utility belt. You started to leave, but you felt Keith’s gaze still on you. “Now’s not the time to be having cold feet, Keith.”

“I just wanted to tell you to stay safe out there.”

“You’ll be right there next to me. Are you sure I’m the one you should be saying that to?”

“I know that. But if being with the Blade has taught me anything, it’s that anything can happen on these missions. Having Shiro back meant everything to me. I don’t want to lose you too.”

Just recently you have learned how important you were to Keith. His obsession with finding Lotor wasn’t only driven by his will to do good, but also to bring a smile to your face. Out of everyone on the team, he was the most willing to confront him. And that meant so much to you. Kindred half-Galran spirits, you thought.

Keith’s breath hitched when you had suddenly wrapped your arms around him. “You won’t.”

He relucted for a moment, lifting his arms to hug back. “You protected me. Now, I’ll protect you.”

 

* * *

 

“Blades, we’re in trouble! What’s the status of your cannon?! _Blades!_ ”

“Copy, Olia. We’re en route,” Keith huffed.  

The muggy air of Senfama made it difficult to run. With the quintessence in your legs, you were able to keep up with the Blades through the forest brush.

“My detectors read that all guards on the outside are robot sentries. I’ll take them out!” In the spur of the moment, you ran ahead, knocking your fist into each sentry.

“Thanks, (Y/N)!”

You took this chance to release your pent-up energy. You were out of practice; your occupation had only required you using your strength for heavy lifting. The activation of quintessence didn’t work as precisely as you’d like but it was enough to disarm the sentries and their commander.

“Now let’s see if this thing works!” Keith took hold of the zaiforge cannon, aiming it at the Teq cruiser to break its shield.

“Ready to provide the Taujeerians with cover!” he reported to Coran.

“All that’s left is to wait and check it—the plan is working. The Volton Coalition can do this!” you prompted cheerfully.

“Zaiforge cannon Senfama, are you still operational?” Matt called. Just after a few doboshes, the power on the Senfama cruiser suddenly deactivated.

“Negative,” Keith answered. “Sorry, Shiro. That’s it for artillery support. What should we do about that cruiser?”

“That battle cruiser’s going to be too late. Naxzela’s almost secure,” Shiro said.

“We’ve accomplished our mission. We should really be going back to help other planets,” you said. “On a battle this scale, I should start tending to the wounded.”

Keith nodded. “Coran, are there any targets that need support?”

“I haven’t heard of anyone needing help. That Galra fleet heading towards Naxzela stopped.”

“Stopped?”

“Yes. Quite a distance away, too.”

“Perhaps the Galra decided it’s too well-fortified to attack,” Kolivan said.

You crossed your arms in skepticism. “That doesn’t sound right…Naxzela was heavily fortified with Galra. Even if Voltron’s close to taking it, there’s a reason it was the last spot on the map.”

“’Victory or death’ is the Galra way. They never stop attacking,” Keith trailed off. “Voltron! Shiro, can you hear me? Shiro! Something’s wrong. I’m going to check it out. I need a ship.”

Keith spotted a Galra fighter, running to pilot it. “That’ll work.”

You chased after him, grabbing his wrist firmly. “Wait—you can’t go out in that thing alone! The coalition might misunderstand and shoot you!”

“I have to make sure everyone’s safe. I’m the fastest pilot here. Just trust me, (Y/N)!” he shouted.

Trust.

You pressed your lips together, slowly releasing your grip. “Just please come back safe.”

If you had trust, it would be with Keith.

 

* * *

 

You boarded the Blades’ ship, watching the monitor carefully. You were all ordered to keep distance to avoid being taken by Naxzela’s bomb. Although the coalition air forces aided Keith, they were nowhere near successful in taking out the main cruiser.

“Does this ship have any artillery? Turrets? Cannons? _Anything_?”

Kolivan shook his head. “We fight in the shadows. If needed, we’ll scourge the cruiser for an opening and shut it down. But by the looks of it, its defenses are impenetrable. All we can do is listen and wait.”

Shiro was right – your abilities were useful head-on. In a situation like this, you felt helpless.

“Follow my lead! We gotta break through that shield—”

You clasped your hands over your mouth. Keith’s left wing was hit by the cruiser’s cannon.

“Keith, stop! Matt, Olia! _You have to get out of there_!” you begged.

“We can’t!” Olia roared. “We’re still in Naxzela’s range! We have to at least _try_.”

“We’ll never penetrate those shields!” Matt said.

“…maybe not with our weapons.”

By the low tone of his voice, you immediately knew.

No.

_I can’t lose you too!_

You rushed your way to take the helm of the ship, pushing the controls to rush toward Keith’s fighter. You’d never forgive yourself if you didn’t try either. The Blades moved in to stop you, using all their members to secure you.

“That’s my friend!” you cried.

“(Y/N)—stop!” Kolivan ordered.

Just in time, you were pulled off the helm. Simultaneously, Keith’s fighter stopped before an incoming bean pierced the cruiser’s shield. When you looked to the distance, a familiar pain took hold of your heart.

“Naxzela has returned to normal. You did it!” Coran cheered.

“Good work Keith,” Shiro said.

“It wasn’t me. It was Lotor. The cannon on his ship was the only thing powerful enough to take down that shield.”

“Attention, Paladins of Voltron and rebel fighters. I know we’ve had our differences in the past…but I think it is time we had a discussion.”

 

* * *

 

You convened with the others in the Castle’s launch bay. When Keith came into sight, you ran to him and tackled him to the ground.

“Ow! (Y/N)—you’re crushing me!”

“You idiot, you absolute idiot! Did you think that we were all going to be okay with you killing yourself?! You’re even more stupid than I thought to follow the Galra way! You’re so stupid…” you hid your face in his chest, hiding your tears.

Keith sighed, pulling the both of you up. “I’m sorry. Thanks for worrying about me, (Y/N).”

“When Shiro finds out, he’s going to—”

Keith stopped your rambling with his hand, taking a hold of your shoulders. “We can’t talk about that right now…just…hold on.”

Your eyes followed Keith’s seeing the Sincline’s torso land. Suddenly, you felt yourself being overwhelmed with tears again.

Behind those doors…was Lotor.

The man that had saved you…

…trained you

…loved you

…and left you.

What were you to do? How were you supposed to act? Surely, you thought you’d never see him again. Somehow, the only means of reuniting would be through death. How naïve you were to continue harboring him in your heart in your next life. Yes, you truly and irrevocably still loved him.

The doors opened, revealing him. Your eyes immediately locked, renewing all feeling. The pain of solitude forgotten, every feeling, every memory rekindled. You needed to return to his arms. That was where you truly belonged.

“ _LOTOR_!”

Just as quickly as you moved, the Paladins and Keith restrained the both of you.

You’ve pictured this reunion for months and he was just _right there_.

“What are you doing?! Keith, let me go!”

“I can’t. He was the leader of the Galra.”

“And he saved your life!”

You looked to him, wincing at the sight of him in chains. But his heartfelt expression didn’t match yours. Instead of relief, he wore a scowl. He only was looking at you, no mistake. By why was he angry?

“Take him to Cell 1,” Allura ordered. “We’ll question him after our forces have reported back in from their respective planets.”

You shook Keith off, storming to her. “What’s going to happen to him?”

“Come with me.” Allura led you to her room, away from prying ears and eyes. Unlike Lotor, kind energy radiated from her. After sitting you on the bed, she knelt before you.

“Allura?” This must’ve been important if she had chosen to speak with you than the coalition.

“Lotor sent a private broadcast to Voltron’s hailing frequency. There was more to the transmission. Would you like to hear it?”

Your heart skipped a beat. You nodded, waiting anxiously as Allura turned on her communications device and accessed the recording.

“ _But before I am to relinquish my freedom to Voltron, I’d like to make certain of something_.”

“ _I don’t think you’re in a position to make any special requests_ ,” Shiro answered. “ _You’re surrounded_.”

“ _This isn’t a request_. _A question_. _I believe you have taken something from me_.”

“ _…You’re talking about (Y/N)_.”

“ _Then she is aboard. If I am to learn a single hair on her hair has been harmed, I will not hesitate to charge the Sincline’s beam again_.”

“ _(Y/N) is safe and well_ ,” Allura answered.

“ _…good. Then tell me where to land the Sin_ —”

Allura turned off her device and frowned.

His first conversation with the Paladins was about you.

“There seems to be more to the story than you let on,” she said. “You were Lotor’s paramour.”

You rubbed your arm nervously. “Yes.”

“(Y/N). I think of you as a good friend, so I am willing to overlook this hidden truth. You’ve proven your good heart by serving the coalition. …So like Lotor, I will give him the benefit of the doubt and listen to what he has to say.”

“In a cage,” you mumbled. “These past months have been excruciating. I want…I need to see him.”

“I know,” she said softly, taking your hand reassuringly. “I’ll make what arrangements I can. Until then, please understand our methods are in the best interest of the universe.”

“Thank you, Allura.”


	17. Love Me Most [♡]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • Take My Heart – Birdy  
> • Someone to Stay – Vancouver Sleep Clinic  
> • Silhouette – Ellie Goulding/Active Child 
> 
> WARNING: Some overdue smut :^)

“I can allow you two vargas. I understand if that’s not enough ample time to—”

“It’s enough.”

Shiro’d never allow it. He and the other Paladins had left to revisit the planets they’ve recruited. If there was a moment to see Lotor, it’d be now. Still, it came as quite a shock to you that Allura was helping you. Allowing you to secretly convene with the son of Zarkon—the man that killed her father and people? She wasn’t incapable of possessing an underlying motive, but you’d take what you can.

“With Coran around it might be difficult to secure privacy but I’ll do what I can.”

“No, Allura, it’s all right. I can’t thank you enough for doing this for me.”

She took your hand again, squeezing it then giving you a small smile. “Go.”

 

* * *

 

You couldn’t run fast enough. Your heart beat against your chest in an anxious rhythm. Why did the cells have to be so damn far? The lift to the cell lowered you at an agonizingly slow pace. In just a few seconds, you’d be face to face with Lotor.

The doors opened, setting you loose like a frightened rabbit. When you caught his eye, he stood from his chair.

“(Y/N).”

His voice was music to your ears.

Your bottom lip trembled as you fought back a sob. Even if the state he was in, he was still as regal and striking as ever. You’ve must’ve been insane to allow someone so powerful to own your heart and mind.

You said nothing as your hands fumbled with the keys. It took a few moments to insert the key and unlock the hatch but the moment you did, Lotor engulfed you in his arms.

“My sweet, my love, my darling,” he cooed with relentless kisses. “My precious (Y/N), you are never permitted to leave my side again. No more tears, little one.”

“Why did you leave me?!” you blurted. “You _left_ me. I was all alone…!”

“Oh, sweet thing.” Lotor pulled you in, nuzzling the stop your head affectionately.  “Please, understand—”

“I waited for you, Lotor. Months of it! Do you know how painful that was? You broke my heart!”

“Allow me to explain—”

“You said you’d never hurt me.” 

“If I had let you stay aboard my ship, then you would have been taken from me in the worst way. General Raht’s appearance proved that Haggar was onto us. I knew you’d be safe with Voltron.”

“Then why didn’t you come back for me?”

“Cause unnecessary alarm to the empire? I’d have exposed the Proto Project had I done that.”

More tears threatened to fall. “…You didn’t plan on taking me back?”

“Believe me when I say every fiber of my being wanted to. But I needed to complete the Sincline ships. Zarkon’s revival and insufferable witch interrupted my plans from fruition prematurely.”

“But where’s the other ships? Axca? Zethrid, Ezor and Narti?”

“Gone,” he said lowly. “They’ve all betrayed me.”

“That’s…”

Impossible. His generals spent centuries serving and protecting him. How much developed or undeveloped in your absence? He claimed that your separation would be productive, but you were left to wonder how much you could’ve done to help him had you stayed.

You bit your bottom lip, tightening your arms around him. “You were all alone.”

“It comes as no surprise.”

“Still,” you pressed on. “You were in danger. I should’ve been by your side. I took an oath.”

“I’d rather face an eternity of solitude than the guilt of your death. What matters now is that we’re here, together.”

Your eyes wandered to the corner of the cell. The security camera’s light turned off. Allura – she must’ve deactivated it.

“I trust that you’ve been treated well?”

“Yeah. The Paladins are from Earth. And Shiro’s their leader.”

Lotor pulled away, looking down at you in surprise. “That's the Shiro you spoke of? So, you’ve found your comrade. In quite unforeseeable circumstances.”

“No kidding.  They’ve kept me in a cell, just like you. Play your cards right and they’ll set you free. They have to.”

Lotor leaned forward, burrowing his nose in the crook of your neck. It’d been so long since he’d marked you; the sensitivity of your skin heightened from his teasing breaths.

“And the half-breed?”

“What?”

“The half-breed you had been embracing when I exited my ship. Did he think to fulfill your needs in my absence?” he snarled.

Oh.

“You mean Keith? He’s like a little brother to me,” you answered, then whimpering from the graze of his fangs against your collarbone. “L-Lotor!”

“I could practically smell his stench on you from the Sincline. I didn’t think I’d have to reestablish my dominance over my mate.” Lotor hoisted you up, wrapping your legs around his waist. He pressed your back against the cell’s glass and excitedly grinded his hardness to you. “Oh, how I’ve missed you, my love.”

You let out a gasp, holding the sides of his face to refocus his attention. “We only have two vargas,” you breathed out. “Security cameras have been turned off.”

“Then we’d better hurry.” Lotor smirked, carrying you over to the cell’s back room. He threw you on the bed, ridding himself of his armor down to his bodysuit. You propped yourself on your elbows, waiting for him to crawl over you. He pinned your wrists down then leaning forward to lick alongside your neck.

“The Paladins have you dressed like a harlot. Tell me, do all earthling doctors dress so promiscuously?”

“It’s less restrictive than the armor you’ve given me.”

“I should punish you for having such wanton behavior. Shall I rip these off you so that the Paladins may visually witness my claim on their precious doctor?”

You shivered from the cold air when he had stripped the both of you. You’d like nothing more for Lotor to have his way with you, but he was the one that had left you. You should be the one in control.

You let out a hum of disapproval, using your strength to overcome his and flip him under you. Lotor’s eyes widened from the sudden reversal, struggling against your hold.

“What’s the meaning of this?”

“I should be the one punishing you,” you seethed.  You lowered your hips to teasingly rub against his erection. “Should I remind you that _you_ left _me_?”

“And I have every intention of fucking you into oblivion,” he growled. You felt his hips move so that the head of his cock angled against your opening. You lost resolve, shutting your eyes and loosening your grip so that he could bury his claws in your hips.

He had always turned feral from your defiance.

And you loved it.

Lotor sat up, retracting his claws to force them down your throat. You eagerly coated his fingers with your tongue. Satisfied with the wetness, he slid his fingers inside of you. His thumb pressed against your clit, pushing you closer to climax as his fangs explored the surface of your skin.

“If you wish to be treated like a trollop, then allow _me_ to remind _you_ whose you are.” With his other hand, he hurriedly ripped a piece of the sheets to tie over your mouth as a makeshift gag.

You made no effort to disobey. You’ve done enough objection to instigate his roughness. All that was left was to enjoy the repercussions of your actions. You deserved to be thoroughly loved.

Lotor knew you were about to come undone, returning his hands to your hips. He hovered his lips over yours to whisper, “Mine,” then filling you with his large cock.

You wished to praise his name, but the sheet muffled your moans. Your helplessness seemed to arouse him even more; incoherent cries and tears of pleasure urged him to fuck you without mercy. He compensated the lack of words by proclaiming your beauty and his ownership over it.

Unhinged, your mind grew hazy from the overwhelming pleasure. In the months of your separation, your body _ached_ for him as well. Your nonstop orgasms were your body’s way of thanking you. There was no reason to deprive yourself and him of release. Your feelings for him brought your body to new heights; Lotor knew this and groaned excitedly when you squirted over him. Each time you did, he forced you still so that his cock remained inside of you.

“ _Stars_ ,” he exhaled with a sadistic grin. “You’re _fantastic_ , my love.”

He took note of your exhaustion and removed the gag. He grabbed at your chin and forced your jaw open so that his tongue met yours. You were finally able to speak, but your throat was sore from your incessant screams. You wouldn’t let this stop you from loving whispers, though.

Lotor momentarily stopped his thrusts to change positions—guiding you backwards so that he lay over you. He distracted you from the pain of his markings by filling you with his cock. You squeezed around him and brought face up to give him a tender kiss.

“Lotor,” you sighed. “I love you so much.”

His breaths quickened, turning to honeyed moans. After one last thrust, he stilled his hips to allow the knot to lock into you, then spilling his seed deep inside you. Being filled by him was an incomparable feeling, especially when he looked into your eyes with devotion.

He held power of you, but you remembered what hold you had over him.

His intertwined your hands, keeping his eyes on you as he kissed your fingers. You returned the affections by kissing his as well. The innocence in your actions made him chuckle.

“Forgive me, (Y/N)—for abandoning the one I hold closest to my heart. I swear, I’ll never let you go.”  

You absentmindedly looked to your joined hands, looking twice at his.

A matching ring.

Your heart clenched. “Lotor you—”

“I am a man of my word. I don’t bed you half-heartedly, my dear. I want you and I to be tied in every aspect.” His other hand traveled down, resting just below your stomach. “From now and for generations to come.”

 

* * *

 

With a third of the empire liberated, there was a new wave of confidence that overtook the coalition. The rebel forces, Blade of Marmora, and Paladins continued to carry out their duties with a skip in their step. All while you moved forward, there was the reassuring fact that Lotor was safe. Although he worked the Paladins to dismantle several Galra factions and facilities, he was confined to his cell. Shiro and the others found his presence on the ship to be unnerving, but your intervention gave them solace.

Your two vargas together weren’t enough. After your secret coupling, Shiro had limited your interactions with Lotor. Allowing you to see each other at your leisure would be too rewarding, he said. So, you could only see him for half a varga each time you delivered meals. It was an understandable order but that didn’t make leaving him any less painful.

“Hopefully he’ll like this,” Hunk said. He pulled a tray from the oven, fanning the fluffy pastries.

“He’s cleaned his plates so far,” you said. “You really have a gift, y’know.”

“It’s just common sense. If it tastes good, go for it. I just so happen to have a universal palate.” Hunk sprinkled a substance on top, then handing one of them to you. “So…you and Lotor huh, doc?”

You raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean?”

“I dunno. I always pictured you with someone like Shiro or something.”

“Shiro had Adam. Everyone knows that, Hunk.”

“Yeah, I know. But I mean like…human. A commander at the Garrison.”

“Oh no,” you cringed. “My aunt would never allow that. _I’d_ never allow it. Not my type.”

“So you’re into tall purple space elves?”

“Exactly,” you laughed. The pastry was airy, a subtle sweetness in the breading. The sprinkles on top brought out the saltiness that complimented the savory chunks inside.

“Hunk,” you said eerily. “This is…one of the best things I’ve ever eaten.”

“Aw, thanks! Y’know, Pidge said the exact same thing.”

“I should bring one to her—and make sure she’s getting enough water.”

 

* * *

 

Pidge could always be found in the study. She never rested, even to celebrate a major victory. She was so young, but the sacrifice of her comfort is what would allow her father to have it, when she found him.

“Hey, Pidge. Hunk just finished baking so I figured you could use one of these.”

Her eyes lit up when you placed the pastry into her hand. “Oh, thanks!”                                      

“You should rest. I’m telling you as your doctor.”

“I will, (Y/N). With all the new information Lotor’s been giving us, it’s been an overload of victories against the empire. I have to find out exactly which prison my dad was taken to.”

“From what I learned, he’s been transported several times—but that just means they value him. I’m sure you’ve narrowed down the potential places.”

“Yeah, exactly!”

You leaned against a desk, watching Pidge work. You didn’t mind spending time like this. You’ve finished your duties for the day and Lotor’s dinner was scheduled in three vargas.

“Actually, (Y/N). Do you mind staying here with me for a while? I might need your help translating some Galran words.”

You beamed. “Sure, Pidge. Just tell me what you need.”

Things weren’t perfect, but small moments like these dissipated the pressures of war. You laughed with Pidge, appreciating the mutual exchange of intellect. Her smiles were genuine and so were yours.

And for once, all seemed well. 


	18. Sword and Shield

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • People Help People – Birdy  
> • Battlefield – Svrcina  
> • Gravity – Sara Bareilles

A heavy silence overcame the room. With a somber expression, you placed your hand on the glass. It lingered by itself until Lotor’s hand matched with yours on the other side. This gesture held so much meaning for the both of you but unlike before, the barrier between you couldn’t be lifted.

So close, and yet so far.

“(Y/N).”

You turned with a start, seeing the Paladins make their way across the cell’s bridge. Even at the sight of Lotor, their expressions were more disturbed than usual.

“Allura? What is it? What’s wrong?” you asked meekly.

“We have…some grave news,” she said.

“The most important piece of your information you’ve given didn’t check out,” Pidge seethed. “Your generals and Zarkon took my father from that prison.”

Your heart panged. Lotor’s generals sided with Zarkon? But why?

“And in exchange for him…Zarkon wants you,” Shiro finished. “We want to hear your input on how we should approach this.”

This was far too much information to take in. Everything was disordered—no matter how you looked at it, any action would result in chaos. But this was Samuel Holt—a man who supported you like a father would. Before, you’d given anything to save him, but the circumstances were far more complex.

“My father has held the universe in a death grip for millennia, but he sees it slipping from his grasp because of your efforts and because of mine. With our forces combined, we would provide the greatest threat Zarkon has ever faced. He knows we could topple his empire, so this is his attempt to tear us apart. But united, we could forge a new path, open doors to new worlds and crush the tyrannical ways of an old regime.”

“A regime you ran!” Pidge continued. “We can’t listen to him—He just wants to save his own skin.”

 “It’s true. If you return me to my father, he would surely see to my demise. And with his most legitimate threat to the throne removed, he would only grow stronger.”

“One less threat to Zarkon and one less threat to us.”

“No, absolutely not. We are _not_ giving you over to him.” You clenched your fist and stepped before Lotor. “ _Pidge_ ,” you warned. “He only ruled for a few months. In that span of time, have you heard anything of his barbarity? And in the time I’ve spent with him, he’s done more good than harm. _He’s not Zarkon_.”

Allura placed a hand on your shoulder to calm you. “(Y/N). Let’s consider all of our options before we decide.”

“Your father, King Alfor, once stood side by side with Zarkon and protected the universe from harm. There was no foe the Paladins of Old couldn’t defeat. Sadly, that time of peace has been lost but, together, we can find it once more. Princess, imagine, a new generation that could lift the mantle of peace.”

A new generation, you thought. He spoke to Allura but why did the connotation of those words match the tone he had given you?

 “The children of King Alfor and Emperor Zarkon, you and I, a royal alliance between Altean and Galra—”

You froze. 

An alliance? He wouldn't so blatantly imply something like that in front of you...

“How about we don’t imagine that?!” Lance shouted jealously.

“Lies! Every word is a lie!” Pidge shouted.

“And what of Zarkon’s words? You think he’ll return your father as he says? You think the corrupted leader of a ruthless empire will be true to his word? He wants more than just me.”

“You think he’ll double-cross us,” Shiro said.

“I think he’d do anything to rid himself of me and claim the Lions of Voltron.”

“An alliance with the heir to the Galra throne could end the war,” Allura began.

“ _What?!_ ” Pidge shouted.

“It’s not ideal. I don’t like trusting the Galra, but it could be our best option.”

Of course It would. Allura was a figurehead; if Lotor and Allura were to publicly announce their alliance, it would send a message. 

Still...something felt...off about it. 

“No!”

“Pidge, think of the lives we could save. Think of the countless worlds we could free.”

“Think of _my father!_ ”

“Yeah, I’m with Pidge. Let’s get this guy out of here pronto. Right, Hunk?”

Hunk shot you a look, fear quite evident in his eyes. “I don’t know. I mean, if this dude here is on our side like he says he is—you are saying you’re on our side, right? Then, couldn’t he lead the Galra toward peace from the inside?”

“We are turning him in and getting my dad back! We have _Voltron_ to bring peace to the universe!”

“Don’t play into Zarkon’s hands!” Lotor roared.

“ _That’s enough_!”

Everyone looked to Shiro with trepidation, waiting for his next words. Obviously, the situation at hand didn’t have time for debate. So, you stepped forward to speak.

“We can’t risk losing either Commander Holt or Lotor.” You narrowed your eyes at Lotor. “I tried to save him. With your help. You told me there was no possible way to save him, even when you gave me the power to do so. And yet, you told Allura and Shiro that you oversaw a facility he stayed at. I understand Pidge’s feelings, so I won’t miss the opportunity to save him.”

“So…what are you saying, (Y/N)?” Hunk asked.

“I’m saying we make the exchange. With me.”

“Don’t be a fool, (Y/N). If they’ll kill me, they’ll _mutilate_ you,” Lotor said darkly.

“I made a vow to stick you with until the end. If you’re at the mercy of Zarkon, I won’t let you do it alone. If anything goes wrong, we’d at least be giving ourselves some leverage.”

“That’s madness. We’d just be losing two people,” Allura said. “We can’t—”

“We’re doing it,” Shiro finalized. “Everyone, prepare for the exchange. Should Zarkon pull anything, we need to have our lions ready.”

Everyone promptly left the cell, leaving you and Shiro with Lotor.

“I’d sooner die than let my father put his hands on (Y/N).”

“He won’t be,” Shiro stated. “I’ll be giving you my bayard.”

You blinked twice. “Shiro…but why?”

“You don’t trust Zarkon to fulfill his end of the bargain,” Lotor said. “Seems like you’re fitting to be a leader—since you clearly display the bearings of a conscience.”

“There has to be a catch. One life for another? He’d just take both. (Y/N), you started this journey with us and you did everything in your power to find us. You have every right to be there with me, Matt, and Pidge. Zarkon doesn’t know you’re with us, so you can use your strength should we feel the need to fight him head-on.”

“I’ve worked so that (Y/N)’s existence would be concealed from the universe. Her quintessence is invaluable. You’re risking your friend’s life.”

“Before she was your fiancé, she was our comrade. As a medic, she has an obligation to her people.”

“Are you both serious? I’m right here! I think I’m old enough to make decisions for myself. I’m going.”

 

* * *

 

Certainly, everyone was on edge. The air was thick with tension. One mistake and the fate of the universe would be sealed. The plans had been decided, so there was no need to fill the room with idle conversation. As Shiro piloted to the designated location, Pidge and Matt sat still. You waited with Lotor at the back of the Altean pod. They cuffed his wrists for an extra measure of security. Vulnerability did not suit him.

Your sat in between his legs, your head tucked underneath his chin. “What do you think’s going to happen?” you whispered.

Lotor pressed a kiss to your temple, stroking your thumb over your hand. “We’ll see.”

“(Y/N). Zarkon’s shuttle just landed,” Matt called. “It’s time.”

You joined the others outside, preparing the quintessence in your core. This was the second time you have seen Zarkon; his figure was more menacing than usual. You had figured the quintessence on his mech suit would be used in your same manner.

When you looked behind him, you fumed. Ezor and Axca loomed over Commander Holt. Cowards, you thought. They’ve abandoned their prince at the most crucial time.

“Send us Commander Holt!” Shiro shouted. “Stay alert. If Zarkon’s going to try something, now would be the time.”

You tightened your fist when Lotor began to walk. Even with the backup plan, you couldn’t stand this. If the plans went through, you’d be handing the love of your life to death. Matt could feel your apprehension, taking your arm to prevent your spontaneity. But he had been too far to stop his sister.

Just a few yards away, Pidge ran to her father. Her hug revealing that he had only been a projection – the real Commander Holt was still abroad the ship.

“NO! No! No, we had a deal! _We had a deal_! Give me my father!”

“If you want this Earthling returned alive, you will forfeit Voltron to me _immediately_!”

“No. No! We have to get dad!”

“Shiro?” While Matt struggled to contain Pidge, you looked to Shiro heatedly.

“What do we do? He has _both_ of them. We can’t let them leave we have to act _now_!”

“Hold your positions until the time is right,” he warned.  

The Black Bayard.

You were all to wait for Lotor.

Lotor paused for a moment, activating the bayard and initiating a fight with Zarkon. The chaos of their attacks was the perfect opportunity to seize Commander Holt.

But your heart deceived your morality.

“LOTOR!”

Zarkon was a formidable opponent. With his innate strength combined with the armor of quintessence, Lotor could only dodge. They moved too fast – you couldn’t find the opportunity to land an attack without hurting Lotor. The terrain of the planet was too rugged to navigate through, so you had to track the destruction of the environment to find them. Over a cliff, you could see remnants of purple light.

Quintessence!

You rushed, seeing Zarkon’s body hurl to Lotor. The burn of quintessence spread from your core throughout your body. You growled, finally closing the distance between you and Lotor to catch Zarkon’s fist in your hands.

The concentration of his strength was too much. You’ve never felt powerless until this moment. Zarkon pushed, the earth breaking beneath your feet. Even with your quintessence, you still couldn’t counter him.

“The Proto Project,” Zarkon said lowly.

You quickly jabbed your left hand forward, pushing his torso to break his chest plate. You tried to pull away to strike again, but your arm was too deeply embedded.  

“ _Insignificant wench_!” Zarkon gripped your shoulder, the metal claws piercing your armor then through your skin. You let out a blood curdling scream, your body becoming limp from the searing pain. “Worthless speck.”  With his other hand, Zarkon held you by your neck and pulled his claws from you. Your airway was block, preventing another scream from you. He tossed your entire being like a doll, the hard impact of the ground draining more blood.

“NO! (Y/N)!”

You couldn’t move. Your quintessence was inaccessible, even in your fingertips.

Your injury had given Lotor more gall to unveil ruthlessness. Fighting Zarkon was almost similar to you—give or take more doses of quintessence. He managed to drive the Black Bayard through Zarkon’s armor, but it still wasn’t enough.

“Lotor,” you whimpered. The pain was too much.

Helpless, all you could do was watch the scene unfold before you.

The Lions cut through the skies, firing at Zarkon. But with the Black Bayard stolen in hand, Zarkon had enough power to level the Lions. Lotor moved, taking a sword and driving it through Zarkon’s back.

Zarkon’s suit powered down, the loss of its light indicating his final breaths.

It was over.

Lotor killed his father.

 

* * *

 

Olkarion sunsets were beautiful. Of course, they weren’t as breathtaking as Lyra’s.

After the battle with Zarkon, you found yourself in the Castle of Lion’s infirmary. Coran had given you a room with a view to make the healing process less tedious. Lotor had urged you to use your vial of Rose of Lyra extract, but you refused. So, you resorted to using your premade ointments and herbal remedies.

Every so often, you’d have visitors. The Paladins, Coran, and Matt made sure to stop by and provide you with company entertainment. Besides Lotor, your most frequent visitor had been Commander Holt. The amount of time you’ve spent together gave you the opportunity to catch up. Thankfully, he wasn’t too mad about your past siding with the Galra.

When Lotor entered your room, you sat up excitedly. “Welcome back.”

“Darling, lay down. You’re going to open your wounds.” He approached your bedside, giving you a kiss before sitting on the edge.

“How is everything?”

“It’s been rather…difficult without you. Convincing them to join me at the Kral Zera may take some time. But time is not something we have. The longer we take, the less impactful my title is. I am grateful to Shiro for seeing things from my perspective. He understands the gravity of our situation.”

You flicked his single bang, getting a smile out of him. “You’ll be okay. It took a while, but Shiro now sees you in the same light I do. Soon, I’m sure the others will too. Then the rest of the universe.”

“What have I done to deserve you?”

Lotor pressed his forehead against yours, gently stroking your cheek. You melted into his touch, taking his other hand and kissing it. You both sat in silence, exchanging small gestures of affection by kisses and caresses.

“You’ll be emperor. You have to be.”

 


	19. Twisted Snakes and Ladders

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • Concrete Angel (Acoustic) – Christina Novelli  
> • Talk to Me – Lauren Aquilina  
> • Pretending – Lea Michele/Cory Monteith

“(Y/N). Get up.”

“Shiro? What’s going on?”

You had been napping peacefully until now. You turned over groggily; when your vision cleared, you saw Shiro dressed in his Paladin armor.

“We’re taking Lotor to the Kral Zera.”

Now, you were fully awake. “What? But the team said—”

“We can’t pass this chance. It could bring peace to the universe at a faster rate than completely eradicating the Galran commanders.”

Just what has gotten into Shiro? Just a few days ago, he didn’t want you to be within 20 feet of Lotor. Now, he worshipped Lotor like an intergalactic messiah. Not only that, but his angry outbursts were becoming more frequent. You’ve never known him to be someone quick to anger. He’d always been collected and compassionate.

 “Hurry and get dressed. We’ll meet you at the Black Lion’s hangar.” Shiro threw your armor at you and left without another word.  

The man before you was not the same one that had left Earth.

 

* * *

 

“Good of you to join us, (Y/N),” Lotor greeted.

“Lotor, are you sure this is a good idea? We can’t take down the empire’s major authorities with just the three of us.”

“We can’t wait. The ceremony is happening within the next hour. If we hurry, we can take Lotor there and settle things,” Shiro said.

“How does that settle things? We’re putting ourselves in danger. Did Allura approve of this?”

Shiro and Lotor remained silent.

“I’ll take that as a no.”

“Did you not say that you’d follow me wherever I’d go?” Lotor asked.

“I did but—”

Lotor extended his hand to you. “Please, (Y/N). I need you by my side when I take the throne.”

Even now, he still felt the need to ask for your trust. If you were to prove your fidelity, what better place to do it than in front of the empire?

You swallowed thickly, taking his hand into the Black Lion.

 

* * *

 

Everything Lotor had worked for – was it all for naught? The death of Zarkon had left the empire in shambles. With the commanders and generals vying for power, what was to be the fate of their conquered planets? What would happen to Qorhl, Lyra, all the people under Lotor’s protection? Shiro had probably considered all of this, which is why you were on a course for Planet Feyiv.

You’ve given everything to Lotor so that he may one day reign over the empire. Always at his side, you willingly became his sword and shield. Becoming his lover was not the original plan but as the fates would have it, that’s what you now were. Your rapport had only complicated your place in the empire. You weren’t Galran and you weren’t royalty. If Lotor took the throne, would he truly give you a place as an empress?

You shut your eyes.

No, don’t concern yourself over needless things. Not now. Think about the situation at hand. You needed to protect him.

Lotor broke your concentration, placing a hand on your shoulder.

“You seem to be more anxious than I.”

“I’m sorry. Guess I’m still a little worried. The Black Lion Paladin, the Crown Prince to the Galra Empire, and the Proto Project. Out in the open.”

“You mustn’t be afraid of your alias. There is a reason people had wished to covet you. You were an unmined resource. Now, you’re able to stand on your own. That power is yours.”

“Lotor! I’ve got a visual on Planet Feyiv. We should be approaching soon,” Shiro said.

Lotor left to join Shiro’s side, waiting for the attendees to show on the monitor. Most of the commanders were unrecognizable to you—no one worth considering a rival. However, a large Galran had already attempted to make their way up the stairs.

“Sendak. I cannot allow him to light the flame. Shiro–open the hatch! I’m going in. (Y/N)! To my side!”

You diligently followed, confidence steady. There was no time to doubt yourself and him. To put Lotor on the throne—it’s now or never.

“Halt! Your true emperor has arrived!” 

Lotor's arrival had made the air thick with tension. 

“You? Lead the Galra Empire?” Sendak sneered. “What could possibly make you think that you could be our emperor?”

“My father’s blood is not just in my veins. It’s also on my sword. The emperor fell to me and so will anyone that stands in my way.”

“You think treachery makes you qualified to lead us?”

“I will light the flame, not for defeating my father and not for being the strongest Galra here. But because I did something no one else could do. I return the Black Lion and Proto Project to the Galra. Stand aside, Sendak.”

Your heart dropped. No subtle introduction, no display of your power.

Lotor had exposed you and Shiro as a _power move_?

“Time to prove yourself through honorable rite of combat!”

“No, time to end this.”

“Enough!”

You whipped your head over your shoulder to follow the voice. No mistake, it was Haggar—the woman who’d bestowed you your powers. By her side was Lotor’s generals. When your eyes met with Axca’s, the air chilled. You’ve worked with them, laughed with them. You’d never anticipate that you’d be on opposite sides of the battlefield. But after Lotor’s stunt, your blood no longer boiled.

“Lotor, you cannot lead the Galra.”

“You think you can stop me, witch?”

“The blood that so bolsters your claim is also what quells it. You are not full Galra. You are a half-breed. Your mother was Honerva.”

“Everyone here knows my lineage, but that will not keep me from the throne. Now I’m taking what’s rightfully mine. I am lighting that flame, and my first act as emperor will be to reunite you with my late father!”

You stood your ground. Do not engage, Lotor ordered. Victory or death—that was the only way he can rightfully claim his crown.

“Should we do something?” Shiro called to you.

“No. It’s a dishonor to him if we interrupt the rite of combat. This is the Galra way.”

Your eyes turned back to the Galra surrounding you. Their golden eyes were full of murderous intent. The image of Dayak flashed in your mind.

 _You will never be true Galra_ … _Lotor will live, and you will die_.

You watched his fight with tears beading in the corner of your eyes.

He didn’t need you to take the crown—he never did.

Just before Lotor was to land a fatal blow, a figure suddenly knocked him down the flight of stairs. An explosion followed shortly after, taking the entire alter. Sendak was caught in the rubble, then emerging in a rage.

“Lotor has betrayed us to Voltron! Fire on the Black Lion!”

The attack of Sendak’s fleet instigated an all-out war amongst the Galran leaders. One right after another, cannon beams and firing lasers set off from every direction. The Kral Zera had become a chaotic warzone.

“(Y/N)! I gotta draw their fire,” Shiro said. “Hurry and get on!”

“I can’t!” you shouted, blocking your eyes from the incoming rubble. “Lotor’s still fighting Sendak!”

“I thought you’re not supposed to join in?”

“I’m not but I still need to make sure he’s safe!”

“Why do all Galran traditions have to be so violent?” he muttered, flying away. “There’s too many. I can’t handle them all myself!”

From your peripherals, a blue light shone. It was a wormhole, and from it, the other Lions had emerged. You sighed bitterly. After heated debate, Voltron came to help anyway. Not for Lotor’s sake, at least.

With Lotor’s revelation, you’d expected the Galra to make headway to you. If they couldn’t light the flame, they’d seek you for a consolation prize. None of them were formidable enough to counter your strength, much less take the throne. Fighting came easy to you. Protecting Lotor was now second nature. But you’d never expected to solely defend yourself.

Your emotions ran high. Galra after Galra, you couldn’t tell their faces apart anymore. You fought through frustration and tears; sheer anger is what possessed your being. How stupid were you to believe that you could actually lead these people? Trovar, Dayak, Axca, Eylek and Groven – they’ve all warned you, _reminded_ you of your humanity.

Your mortality.

If you were to die here and now, so that Lotor could take the throne…what difference would you make?

Your muscles relaxed, lessening the brunt of your strength. The Galra before you reaped your moment of weakness and raised their scythe to end you.

“(Y/N)!”

A sword flung to the Galran’s chest, effectively cutting him down. In an instant, Keith jumped down to you and helped you up.

“What the hell are you doing?!” he yelled, shaking your shoulders.

You had no words. Just the pain in your eyes.

He was taken aback at your distraught expression, taking you to the steps.

Your eyes were caught by the brilliant purple flame above you. At its center stood Lotor.

Poised, solemn.

An emperor.

 

* * *

 

Captain of the Royal Guard.

Emperor Lotor’s escort, inamorata, and executioner.

Or as others would say behind closed doors, Princess Proto.

Authority came with sacrifice and in your case, the abdication of your position with Voltron. There was no question that you’d align yourself with the Galra. After all, that’s what you had been trained to do. The relinquishment of your comfort was also a part of your title. You weren’t bred into royalty; so, your initial reactions to the royal court’s whispers didn’t help in your favor. To them, you’d been annunciated as Lotor’s bed slave and mindless vassal.

You learned not to care. Knowing you could eradicate them at your leisure made the transition less painful. Appointing Eylek and Groven as your charges made things even easier. You missed them terribly. Surprisingly, you sometimes preferred their company to Shiro’s erratic hostility. They made the same comments and jokes that eased your heart. Not much had changed in your time apart. You were glad there was at least _some_ sort of consistency in the new empire.

Lotor grew distant. Did you have his new obligations to blame? No. You’ve spent day and night by his side. There was absolutely no context for his aloofness. You’ve proven your devotion—what did you do to deserve this…grief?

“Alert the Paladins to join with me at Central Command in three quintants,” he ordered.

You complied, transmitting a written notice to the Castle of Lions. Lotor preferred communications by those means—especially when he was cooped up in his research facility. Unlike his old cruiser, it was more spacious and resourceful. This was Haggar’s old working space. Everything to do with quintessence experimentation was done here. You recognized probably only a tenth of all the tools and machines.

“How much more work do you have?”

“I’ve readied the comet to be broken down for engineering. Should Allura agree to it, we can begin construction as soon as possible. I only need to hail the Fiyera Sector to bring in more shipments of gorgemite.”

“Then afterwards we can make a trip to Lyra?”

“I’ve pushed all diplomatic excursions to next phoeb. There is still much to be done.”

You were hopeful. Yesterday, he pushed the original date to next week. You’d forgotten how often he’d postponed your trip. Now, everything just seemed…dismal.

You hadn’t even remembered the last time he held you.

“Is accessing unlimited quintessence the absolute number one priority?”

“We’ve discussed this, (Y/N). You know it is vital to restore the universe to a peaceful era.”

“You can’t do that by just working with Voltron?”

“With the quintessence, we won’t need Voltron.”

You huffed. This was infuriating. You were discussing something important and he still had his back turned to you. Do you even remember the last time he looked you in the eye?

You moved to stand in front of him. “You don’t need me. What am I even doing here?”

Lotor pulled his eyebrows together. “(Y/N), you’re acting like a child.”

“It’s because you treat me like one! I haven’t had a reprieve since the moment you lit that flame. Exactly _what_ power do I have if I’m not able to stand without you?”

“If you so desire to be away from me, then be my guest.”

“That’s not what I’m saying. We haven’t been spending any quality time together.”

“Then go join Voltron. Have some falsified belief of companionship—that you have value.”

Your eyes flashed in a rage. “As if I do here! You brought me and Shiro to the Kral Zera like a trophy! Did you honestly think the Galra would accept a _tool_ as their empress?”

“Is that what you think?” He countered your fury by towering over you. “That I parade you around like a toy? Do you not realize that you betray my feelings with your uncertainty?”

No matter how hard you tried, his mind was still an unsolvable puzzle. Every time you connected, those moments were only irregular pieces you’ve forcibly put together. Now, looking at the bigger picture, everything was a mess. No coherent picture could be made from what you’ve created. Only _he_ knew what the true image was—his ulterior motive.

“Then tell me _exactly_ why you brought me to the Kral Zera. Why is it that I can’t leave central command?”

His silence stabbed at your heart.

“ _Lotor_!” you persisted.

“Is it not enough to say that I am selfish? That I merely want to keep you at my side?”

“And that’s all,” you finished. “There’s more to it, I just know it. I need you to tell me more.”

“As I recall, you weren’t there by my side when I lit the flame. _You_ were with _Keith_. Tell me, (Y/N), have your feelings changed? Have insignificant whispers so easily swayed your allegiance?”

“ _No_ , _never_!”

“Then why is it that you undermine my agency?”

You didn’t know. You didn’t know anything anymore.

“I just want to understand,” you confessed. “You do everything by yourself. When I said I love you, I meant every aspect of you, unconditionally. You don’t have to isolate yourself with me. Help me to understand.”

“I’ve lived thousands of years in isolation.” he said as he walked passed you. “I can continue doing so without you.”

 


	20. Her In Your Arms

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • Her (Loving You) – Glades  
> • One Last Time – Ariana Grande  
> • i hate u, i love u – gnash/Olivia O’Brien

“I’m really sorry I can’t be there to see you off, Commander Holt.”

“Aw, that’s all right. I’m just glad to know that you’re safe,” he said from the monitor.

“Did you get my message to home from Hunk?”

“Yup! You and everyone else’s. I gotta say, (Y/N)—I’m really proud of you for climbing the ranks of the Galra Empire. No background in combat training, either. Admiral Sanda would be proud too.”

You hummed. The only person who was more overprotective than Lotor was your aunt. If she had met him, he’d be facing a pain worse than Dayak’s crop. “Thanks. Save travels, okay?”

“Thank you. Give Lotor my regards.”

“I will. Goodbye.”

 

* * *

 

“You’re late.”

“There weren’t scheduled to arrive in another varga. Sue me.”

“You are to report when summoned. I’m not afraid to strip you of your library privileges.”

Go for it, you thought. Lotor had already punished you by banishing you from the conservatory.

The Paladins and Coran entered the throne room, greeted by the majesty of new banners and reprogrammed sentries. Rather than paying a visit to the Qorhlians and Lyrans, he spent so much energy and time redecorating. 

“Thank you for coming, my friends. I’ve prepared a new imperial banner to herald our alliance. This is the same symbol that flew over our fathers when they worked together as the original Paladins of Voltron. I hope we can return the universe to that golden age. Since I ascended to the throne, the Galra Empire has been torn apart. A sizable portion has sworn its allegiance to me. However, massive factions remain in revolt.”

You rolled your eyes.

That wouldn’t have been the case if he followed through with his diplomatic meetings.

“Uh, okay. The Galra aren’t exactly known to turn the other cheek,” Hunk said.

Lance pouted. “They’re more likely to swing the other fist.” 

“How do you get an empire that’s only known violence for thousands of years to put down their weapons?” Shiro asked.

“By providing them with the very thing they’re fighting for. Quintessence. Unlimited amounts of it. And Allura, you are the key to getting it.”

Your heart squeezed painfully when you remembered those words.

 _I need your help to further unlock the mysteries of quintessence_.

Lotor’s eyes shot you a quick look before turning back to Allura.

How cruel.

In return for opening your heart, he met you halfway with revenge? Lotor had never done anything to intentionally hurt you. Did the crown come with malice? He was driving a knife through your heart, fully knowing it.

“Uh…(Y/N)?” Lance called.

“Huh?”

You had been so preoccupied by Lotor’s words that you hadn’t even noticed that he had already left with Allura. You were left with Hunk, Lance, Pidge, and a robotic sentry.

“Soooooo…we’re free to roam around Galra HQ and have some fun?” Hunk asked.  

“Um, I’m not… _not_ allowing it,” you said.

“What is fun?” the sentry asked.

“You’re about to find out,” Lance said.

Pidge raised an eyebrow. “Lance, it’s a robot. It can’t have fun. Unless…I reprogram it.”

“TAKE US TO THE SENTRY REPAIR CENTER!”

 

* * *

 

“Reconfigured processor inserted.”

“Check.”

“All rewired for optimal fun performance.”

“Checkity-check.”

“Now, just gotta upload the new program, and…All right! I’m finished!”

“Yeah! Team Punk does it again!” they said in unison.

The four of you loomed over the sentry, anxiously waiting for its startup.

“How do we know if it worked?” Lance asked.

“The whirring and beeping sounds promising,” you said.

With no warning, the sentry rose, causing you all to scream in fright, and knocking Pidge’s forehead in the process. “You dum-dums got any non-lethal, semi-combustible diversionary devices?”

“What?”

You knelt by Pidge, rubbing down the welt on her head.

“I think he’s…looking for firecrackers!” she yelled.

“Oh. It worked,” Hunk said.

 

* * *

 

God, when was the last time you laughed this hard?

If Lotor was going to play that game, you could do one on your own.

By having ‘harmless’ fun.

From explosions, to stealing, to vandalism—the four of you were having an absolute _blast_ with the newly programmed sentry. You were just a little mad you hadn’t done this earlier. In the process of wreaking havoc in Central Command, your armor was easily identified by Eylek and Groven. Avoiding them while goofing off made all your activities even more thrilling.

“YEAH! LIGHT THAT FLAME!” Pidge yelled.

You hung from the ballroom chandelier, igniting the last match to set it aflame. You jumped down, admiring the reversed bonfire.

“Now we have an indoor sun,” the sentry said.

“CAPTAIN (Y/N)!” Groven shouted.

You shot your sentries a devious grin before picking Pidge up and running away.

 

* * *

 

The next item on your bucket list was a joust.

“Oh, they’re _definitely_ going to patrol that area,” you jeered.

“Pidge and I will ambush them from behind. Lance, sentry, get ready to grab ‘em and go!” Hunk whispered.

You heard footsteps, pressing an index finger to your lips. “Shhh~ Here they come!”

When Eylek and Groven reached the target mark, they fell right into your devised trap. Lance and the sentry tied them to the hover-dollies, all ready to begin.

“Captain (Y/N),” Eylek grunted. “Untie us this once!”

“Nope! We’re already goin’!”

“Razzle-dazzle!” Lance shouted.

“Ramming speed,” the sentry ordered to Hunk.

Well, you weren’t sure what Lance expected. Metallic robot versus fleshy human? Of course he was going to lose.

While Hunk prepared popsicles for everyone, you iced and bandaged Lance’s injuries. You wore the sentry’s makeshift necklaces proudly.

“So there are no hard feelings, I made you these,” the sentry said while giving one to Lance.

“So worth it.”

“So what’s next?” Pidge asked excitedly.

“We’ve got a robeast coffin,” you suggested.

The sentry’s helmet lit up. “Oh! Oh! I want to be launched! Launch me into the stars!”

Groven raised his hand to object, but you quickly shut him down when you had already started to lead them to the launch bay.

 

* * *

 

After placing the last few bits of tape onto the sentry, you joined the others in the control room.

“Are you sure about this?” Hunk asked.

“We’ve been over this already. Let’s light this candle. Woooo.”

You snorted. Its excitement certainly didn’t match its monotone voice.

“Do you think Lotor would mind us firing the robeast coffin?” Hunk asked.

You and Pidge both shrugged your shoulders. “I don’t know.”

“Come on, I’ve always wanted to see the stars.”

“Aaaaaand now you will,” Lance sang, hitting the launch button.

“Later, pala-dudes. Wheeeee.”

_Holy shit._

Lotor was going to kill you…

…for not inviting him for the launch because the explosion that followed the coffin had a view comparable to Lyra’s sky.

 

* * *

 

You affectionately wrapped your arms around Pidge, nuzzling your face against hers. She didn’t object to your touch, especially when you complimented her ingenious decision to reprogram the sentry.

“My cheeks hurt so bad! Oh man, I forgot what it’s like to mess around like that.”

“I know right?!” Lance said. “Feels good to let loose huh?”

“No kidding,” you said, stretching your arms over your head. “I really needed that. Thanks, guys.”

“Hey, you guys find anything good?”

Shiro and Coran returned to the throne room, also escorted by a sentry.

“You could say that,” you said with a grin. Lance, Hunk, and Pidge raised their necklaces with the same giddy expression.

“Paladins.”

You all turned your head to the top of the stairs, spotting Lotor and Allura…arm to arm. And on Lotor’s face was a smile you’d had only seen in closed quarters.

It didn’t take long for your happiness returned to sorrow.

“We must return to the Castle of Lions,” Allura announced. “We have a lead.”

 

* * *

 

Allura would never hurt you either.

Right?

She was the only one who approved and helped you get to Lotor. Without her, you wouldn’t have had the opportunity to meet with him.  She was your friend, she’d never entertain the idea of coming between you to.

But without her, Lotor would never be able to accomplish his lifelong goal.

It was _you_ Lotor could do without.  

“So, this magic rock is gonna guide us to a mysterious planet?” Pidge asked skeptically.

“A land known as Oriande,” Lotor said.

 “I’m afraid someone’s been ruggling your wimble, Prince Lotor. Oriande is just an Altean folktale. It doesn’t actually exist,” Coran chuckled.

Allura shook her head. “That’s what I thought, Coran. But now, I have a feeling that it is quite real.”

“It is the birthplace of all Altean alchemy. The place where King Alfor learned the secrets that helped him create Voltron and where Allura will master those same secrets so that my ships may enter the quintessence field,” Lotor said.

“And what makes you the authority on crazy Altean nonsense? Coran knows more magic made-up gobbledy-gook than anyone I’ve ever met.”

“Thank you, Lance. And I can assure you, King Alfor never mentioned anything to me about traveling to Oriande.”

“In all likelihood, he kept it a secret from everyone. I have been researching Oriande for centuries, hoping to learn more about my Altean ancestry. Over time, I’ve managed to gather evidence from all over the universe that hinted at its existence. Now, thanks to Princess Allura, I will finally gaze upon its magnificence with my own eyes.”

“Uh, aren’t you a little busy running your empire to take a magical vacation?”

Bless Hunk’s heart. You thought the same exact thing.

“You’re still scheduled to visit the other quadrants,” you said impatiently. “How long will this journey take?”

“In order to transition the Galra Empire to a peaceful existence. I need to open up a pathway to the quintessence field. Once my people have access to unlimited energy, the old ways of the empire will be behind them.”

“If this voyage is successful, the universe will finally be on the path to peace,” Allura said.

Using the stone’s map, the Castle of Lions was sent to the Patrulian Zone. Coran had warned the team of its dangers, but Allura and Lotor were adamant on setting a course there. Everyone else seemed to be on the same page, looking to each other hesitantly when the voyage was beginning to turn more and more dangerous. First, a graveyard of ships. Second, a massive white hole. And now, a giant white lion had emerged to destroy Voltron.

“What have you done?!” Coran shouted. “Wait, what’s happening to your face?”

“What?”

You ran between Coran and Lotor, blinking rapidly at the sight. “That’s new. Does it hurt?”

"No." 

“You have Altean marks! And they’re glowing!” Coran exclaimed. 

Lotor paused, touching his face. “The Mark of the Chosen…You need to get out of there! That thing is a guardian! It will only allow worthy Alteans through.”

Voltron dodged the Lion’s beam, only to direct the attack to the Castle. It was too fast and strong for the Castle’s particle barrier to endure.

“All systems shutting down. Our stabilizers aren’t working! We’re listing into the graveyard!”

The guardian charged its next beam, this time hitting Voltron with enough strength to separate and deactivate the Lions.

“Is everyone okay? Nothing broken?” you asked when the Paladins returned.

“We’re fine,” Shiro stated. “Just a little shaken up, I suppose.”

“I managed to restore auxiliary power, but it won’t last long. If we don’t get the Castle running within the next quintant, we’ll be out of air,” Coran informed.

“Maybe we can decrease our breathers by one,” Lance grumbled.

“I don’t think CPR will work on Alteans/Galrans,” you retorted jokingly.

“If this is the birthplace of Altean Alchemy, why can’t Voltron get in?” Pidge asked.

“I am sorry to put us in this position, but I think I know the answer,” Lotor said. “Look at Allura.”

The green hand of jealousy and envy had taken a hold of you. Allura had shared the same markings. This was something out of Lotor’s control, but it sure did make the torture more unbearable.

“Allura and I need to enter the white hole alone.”

You were glad Lance and Coran were just as bristled as you. Surely, you wouldn’t lash out in front of everyone so deliberately.

“The monster is a guard keeping the unworthy out. It won’t hurt _us_.”

“Allura, _please_ ,” Coran begged. “It’s too dangerous.”

“Coran, I must gain some kind of alchemic knowledge in Oriande both to save our own lives and bring peace to the universe.”

“Coran! (Y/N)! Don’t tell me you’re going to cave in on this,” Lance protested.

“Lance, she’s right,” Shiro said. “The ship is stuck unless the princess can somehow get it restarted.”

“Don’t worry, this will work. I can feel it,” she reassured. 

Hunk prepared their personal transports to Oriande. While making preparations to leave, Coran and the Paladins said their goodbyes.

Lotor was leaving again...

You approached him with trepidation, fiddling your hands together.

“How many times do we have to say goodbye?” Your voice was so small, you expected him not to hear it. "…get back safe."

Gathering the courage, you looked him in the eye.

“I will.” His expression was soft, but it was a smile still remnant from his shared moment with Allura. He caressed your hair, placing a gentle kiss on your forehead.

He shared no feeling behind your parting…

...but it still hurt.

 

* * *

 

How many times would you have to _wait_ for Lotor?

Did you even know what you were waiting for?

Snide comments, indifference—you didn’t even recognize him anymore.

You shut your eyes, squeezing your hands together. 

Just as you believed in him before, you needed to continue doing so. Someone had to. 

“Shiro! (Y/N)! Can one of you take Lance, please?”

Maybe Lance was more bristled than you thought. At least you weren't the only one with untamed thoughts. 

You sighed, taking the Blue Paladin’s arm and patting it comfortingly. “C’mon, kiddo. Don't hurt yourself.”

You entered the outside corridor, Shiro following behind. Both you and Lance’s attention turned him when he groaned and rubbed his forehead in discomfort.

“Still shaken up?” you asked. “I have some uroxen gels for migraines.”

“N-no, I’m fine. Lance, let me ask you something. Do you remember, on Olkarion, how you asked me about talking to you from inside Voltron?”

“Yeah.”

“What happened there? I can’t remember any of it.”

“We were all in some kind of mystical Voltron mindspace and you were yelling something, but I couldn’t hear you. Are you okay?"

“I—I don’t know. My head…I’m just…I’m feeling so confused. It’s like…like I’m not myself.”

You and Lance exchanged a look, helping Shiro to sit down.

“It’s probably just lack of oxygen,” Lance suggested.

“You should still probably take the gels anyway. Maybe you need to hydrate.” You placed one in Shiro’s hand, then offering him your canteen.

“How are you doing though, (Y/N)? You seriously okay with Lotor and Allura going off on their own like that?” Lance asked.

“I’m fine.”

Shiro and Lance jumped.

Maybe you shouldn’t have answered that quickly.

“I’m fine,” you repeated slowly. “They’re adults. They can make their own decisions.”

“But you’re engaged,” Shiro said firmly, pointing at your ring.

“Not exactly. It’s just…a symbol of our rapport. I’d never be the empress of the Galra empire!” You forced a smile, but Shiro knew you better than that.

“He’s not my prince,” he said. “I can tell him off if you’d like.”

“Yeah, me too! If he thinks Allura’s that easy, he’s got another thing coming.”

“Look, I appreciate it, but really, it’s okay. We should focus on the positives! When they come back, we’ll be a step closer to bringing peace to the universe.”

“Say, (Y/N),” Lance began. “You got a crazy amount of quintessence in you, right? That’s what makes you strong? If Lotor ends up going to the rift…he can make more people like you—”

“Lance!” Shiro interrupted.

The room began to spin. Not from the depletion of air, but from the truth behind Lance’s words.

Why haven’t you realized that before?

All this time, you’ve been working toward you own demise, helping Lotor achieve his goal. Your strength was a crutch; it’s what made you special in his eyes. If the empire were to have an unlimited amount of quintessence, there would be no need for the Proto Project. Anyone could have untold strength. But they wouldn’t be the ones to gain favor with him…

…it’d be the one who’d made that dream a reality.

Allura.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That chapter was literally an emotional roller coaster LOL but yay we've reached the end of S5! ToT Sorry for all the angst but Lotor was written off so tragically so it's only gonna get worse from here l m a o I miss the good 'ol days of writing fluff


	21. A Deeper Ocean

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • Little Do You Know – Alex & Sierra  
> • Sweet Architect – Emeli Sandé  
> • Lovers or Liars – Lauren Aquilina 
> 
> WARNING: Sensitive topic of discussion; look to the end notes for details. ***

Your heartbreak had taken an even worse toll than you thought. Wasn’t your quintessence supposed to rid you of your sicknesses?

You supported yourself over a sink, trying to hold down the water you drank. You needed to hydrate. Water would be the key to keeping your organs alive and functioning. You tried to perform deep breathing, but the rise and fall of your chest only triggered the acid to rise in your esophagus.

“(Y/N)?” Shiro called from outside your door. “Lotor’s asking for you.”

Uroxen gels…where were they?

You reached for the cannister, but you withdrew your hand to prevent vomit from escaping your mouth. The attempt apparently required too much energy, causing you and the contents on your counter to fall all together.

“(Y/N)!” Shiro barged into your room, helping you off the ground. “Are you all right? You’re shaking.”

“Yeah, I’m okay,” you breathed out. “It might be something I ate.”

“I don’t think so. Nobody just falls over like that from food poisoning.”

“I’m fine,” you urged.

“It must be your anxiety. Two peas in a pod.” Shiro carried you to your bed, sitting you on the edge. You gestured to your canteen, Shiro then quickly grabbing it to bring over to you. “Is it what Lance said?”

 “I’m already walking a thin line as it is. When Lotor accesses the quintessence rift, he won’t hesitate to get rid of me.”

“Don’t say that. He’s risked his life for peace, I don’t take him for a jerk.”

“But what if Lance is right, Shiro? I don’t possess alchemic abilities. I’m not a space princess. I’m just—” You sighed, staring hard at your ring. “—human.”

“But Allura hasn’t stuck by his side the way you did. You’ve sided with him through…everything.”

You lifted your eyes to meet Shiro’s, but his were to the ground as well.

Adam.

Things were difficult, but Adam had every right to make the decision to break-up with Shiro for himself.

Would Lotor do the same for you?

You held his hand and rested your head on his shoulder. “I’m sorry, Shiro.”

“We have each other. You won’t get through this alone. I promise.”

 

* * *

 

Shiro helped you to the throne room, allowing you to use his arm for support. When you saw the others surrounding both Allura and Lotor, he gave your hand a reassuring squeeze.

“You’ve kept us waiting,” Lotor said.

“Lotor, be kind. (Y/N)’s probably still tired from her injury from Zarkon.” 

“I’m fine,” you said sternly, pushing yourself from Shiro. “Let’s just hurry and get to that briefing.”

“We’ll see what intel is in your briefing and decide what to do from there,” Shiro said. “Maybe we can—”

“Lotor.”

“Oh no,” he grimaced.

“Uh…who the heck are you?” Lance chimed in. 

“How dare you speak to me without authorization from Blood Emperor Lotor.”

“OW!”

You knew that crop and scowl.

“Dayak?”

Clearly, Lotor wasn’t too happy seeing her. “She was my governess. No one has used the term ‘Blood Emperor’ since before we were a star-faring race. And these are my colleagues. They have more than my permission to speak. Everyone, this is Dayak.”

With each greeting from the Paladins, Dayak said nothing. But to you…she gave a curt nod.

“It is good to see you again, Lady (Y/N).”

“So, to what do we owe the honor?” Lotor asked.

“Word of your victory at the Kral Zera has spread throughout the empire. I always knew you had it in you to crush your enemies. Dayak’s raised you from a child to a man and now I’ll witness your ascension to the throne.”

All but Lance laughed hysterically. “Wait, she raised you from a child? Aww, is this your nanny?”

“Governess…”

“YOU HAVE A NANNY! Ho man – is she going to read you bedtime stories? Is she going to rock you to sleep? Is she gonna—OW!”

You stifled a laugh. You could always count on Lance to lift your spirits.

“I instructed Lotor in the ways of the Galra. The history of our conquests, our customs, battle philosophy, the art of war.”

“Hmm, Galra customs, huh?” Hunk pondered aloud. “Is that like when you guys say ‘vrepit sa’ and stuff? Gah, there’s so much we don’t know about you.”

“If you’re interested in our society’s history, you couldn’t find a better teacher than Dayak,” Lotor offered.

“What Lotor says is true. I’ve also provided my tutelage to the Lady (Y/N) to properly rear her as Captain of the Royal Guard.”

When Hunk turned to you, you nodded to give confirmation. Without Dayak, you’d be completely lost.

“Oh wow. Would you really teach me about the Galra?”

“What do you wanna know about the Galra for?” Lance asked.

“Well, we’re going to be working with Lotor to bring peace throughout the empire, right? Just makes sense the more we know about their society, the better.”

“If you are to learn the ways of the Galra you must be prepared for the most challenging trial you could ever undertake. There will be no turning back. _Victory or death_.” 

“Uh, oh, that’s okay.”

“If I could do it, you certainly can too, Hunk,” you said.

“Well yeah, cuz your body’s a big ‘ol muscle. You can take the hits.”

“Hunk, you’re a Paladin of Voltron. There is no challenge too great for you,” Allura prompted.  

“Hmm…will I learn what ‘vrepit sa’ means?”

“Yes,” Dayak answered.

“Let’s do it!”

You clicked your tongue. Allura was only proving herself to be worthier as future Empress.

 

* * *

 

Lotor’s itinerary for the day had been particularly long.  You carried yourself through each briefing, speech, and ceremony. If it weren’t for Shiro giving you occasional pep talks, you’d be following Lotor by crawling. As eventful as today was, you were grateful that the Paladins were present to counter any threat. Still, you needed to get better. You couldn’t rely on them to be around all the time.

When the alarm resounded through Central Command, your mind remained hazy. Everyone’s words drowned out and your vision became blurry.

“Sendak’s attempts to reclaim the empire are futile,” Dayak said. “How fortunate you are, Lotor – to have the Paladins of Voltron and the Proto Project on your side.”

“Yes,” he answered mindlessly. “(Y/N)! I want all status reports on the quadrants to the east of the empire.”

You nodded tiredly, taking a few steps toward your personal monitor.

“(Y/N), did you hear me—”

Before you knew it, your body hit the ground. Queasiness over took you, draining all energy you had to respond.

Dayak rushed to your side, propping your head on your lap. She pressed her palm against your forehead, then sending a glower in Lotor’s direction.

“You’ve overworked her!”

“That’s impossible…Her quintessence provides her with an unlimited supply of energy.”

“Don’t be a fool. Even your father needed moments of respite. Relieve her! _Now_!”

 

* * *

 

You nodded off before you realized what happened. When you came to, you realized that it was not your room where you were put to rest, but Lotor’s.

Was it him that put you here?

Even it wasn’t true, you felt significantly better. Perhaps all you needed was some rest.

You attempted to move from the bed, but a sudden movement had startled you.

“Get back in.”

“Yes, Dayak,” you squeaked.

She crossed over from her chair to you, pulling the blanket over your chest.

“Thank you.”

“From this day forth, I will be the one to attend to your duties.”

“What?” you gasped. “Why? I’m perfectly fine.”

“On the contrary. I performed an extensive physical examination on you while you were sleeping.”

“So much for consent,” you muttered. “So, what did you find? What’s wrong?”

Dayak sighed, taking a seat beside you. You didn’t like how this was starting.

“Over exertion of your abilities have woken your dormant ailments. You’ve performed over max capacity without the required hiatuses in between.”

“I’ve had a minor heart problem,” you admitted. “But even when I was sick, I was fine. Just simple angina.”

“Pushing yourself isn’t advisable in your… _other_ current condition.”

You remained quiet, unsure of her implication. Her usual tart look faded to a sensible mien. “Congratulations,” she began slowly, placing her hand to your lower stomach. “You are with child.”

…

“What?”

Your eyes widened in horror.

Your senses had been dialed to 100, all sense of composure thrown out the door. You frantically tried to recall your last period. How long has it been? Weeks? _Months_? Of course you hadn’t noticed. You’d been far too busy helping Voltron _and_ Lotor. But you’ve been intimate with Lotor so often, you couldn’t determine the exact time you concieved.

So, it had to be true. Dayak wouldn’t lie, not to you.

How could you have been so careless? You’re a doctor for god’s sake. All the signs were clearly evident that you were pregnant. And all while you held his child, you’ve endangered its life by participating in battles that you should’ve been _galaxies_ away from.

….Were you pregnant when you fought Zarkon?

You held your face in your hands, unable to contain the guilt. You released a silent sob, the overwhelming anxiety bring back your nausea.

“Get a hold of yourself!” Dayak barked. “This is a blessing from the ancients—it only strengthens Lotor’s sovereignty for millennia to come.”

“We’re not even married!”

“A political formality. It’s still a necessary requirement but every Galra knows that a claim is much more significant.”

“This child will have an extremely complicated genetic makeup,” you rambled. “I don’t know if my quintessence will drastically affect its quality of life! I can’t raise it—”

“You won’t.”

Your stopped. Your fingers gingerly rested upon your stomach. Your first acknowledgement of your child’s existence.

“I’ve told you before. Lotor will live—and you will die. You’ve served your purpose as the emperor’s consort. Your race is not meant have an extensive lifespan. Your child will outlive you. And in that time, I will ensure that the child is nurtured in the ways of the Ga—”

“You will do no such thing,” you hissed.  Anger had burned through your body. “My child will be more _human_ than Galra. I'd tear this empire down before I let anyone touch them.”

Lotor’s feelings for you may have turned unrequited, but he wasn’t heartless. He’d never let his flesh and blood be raised in the void.

Dayak stood, visibly taken by your words. She cleared her throat, revaluating her place.

“Forgive me. I’ve overstepped my boundaries. Evidently, you’ve merited your place as the honorary Galran empress. Your valor and motherly instinct match those to a full-bred.”

You sat up, still caressing your womb. You took her words to consideration, letting the tension simmer before you continued.

“Does Lotor know?”

“The mother should always be the first and only to know.”

Good.

You nodded gratefully. “Thank you. I’m sorry I lashed out at you. This all…obviously, very surprising to me. I appreciate you for taking care of me. And I’m even more grateful to you for being willing to raise our child in my stead. In this messed up universe, you’ve raised Lotor so wonderfully. So, I’d be happy to know they’d cared for by you.”

“Needless words of affirmation,” she snarked. “Perhaps you’re still not as Galra as I thought.”

You laughed a bit.

By Dayak’s standards, you took that as a compliment.

 

* * *

 

While Lotor continued to rule, you rested. From Dayak, you had learned that he had granted you several days of well-deserved rest. It had been only been a couple of hours since you last saw him. But since Dayak’s revelation, you could hardly sit still.

What were you going to tell Lotor?

He was undergoing enough stress as it is—with Sendak’s rebellion and the building of the Sincline’s final ship…you wouldn’t dare to pile the load. But the strain of your relationship must’ve added to it already. And he had to see you every day.

_Do you not realize that you betray my feelings with your uncertainty?_

You inhaled deeply to calm yourself. It was probably your hormones that instigated that argument. But still, Lotor wasn’t petty. Sure, he teased you every so often when others had interest in you, but his ego was too big to let jealously run skin deep.

A feeling of guilt grew in the pit of your stomach. He’d proven his love for you just as often as you did—and you secretly accused him of falling for Allura. The life that grew within you was evidence that he cared for you.

But why was he still so angry?

You turned to your side and nestled your head to his pillow, inhaling his scent. After he accomplishes his goals, _then_ you’ll tell him. He’ll be happy to know that he’ll be rewarded by having another in his life to love him unconditionally. That’s the solace you’ll have until then. The inevitability of his smile.

“We’re going to be okay,” you whispered.  

 

* * *

 

You easily awoke to the doorknob’s rattling. Lotor entered the room, exasperated. He undressed himself of his armor, quickly changing to his night clothes. He eyed you every other minute, but neither of you said a word. When he finished his bedtime routine, he walked to the door instead of joining you in bed.

“You’re not going to sleep in your own room?” you finally spoke.

“As of now, I have no inclination of being in the same room.”

 “Will you ever?”

“You’re still acting like a child,” he muttered, opening the door to leave.

You rose, stepping out of bed to stop him. “And you’re still not acknowledging the fact you’re treating me like one.”

Lotor shut the door, looming over you again. “You want me to apologize for protecting you? I will not.”

“And you want me to be okay with that? Making decisions for me that are _clearly_ making me unhappy?”

“I’m not asking. I’m your emperor and you _will_ heed my commands.”

You began to shake. You were losing control of the situation. You didn’t want to make him angry. But was it you or your child that was igniting your fury?

“What commands? You broke your word—said you’d never make decisions without my consent.”

“I’ve done plenty _without_ your knowledge from the very beginning. This is the thanks I get? I am the very reason that you’re breathing and standing before me right now.”

“If it weren’t for _me_ , King Morhlun would’ve cut your leg off! Zarkon would’ve bludgeoned your head! You wouldn’t even be alive to become emperor!”

Lotor growled uncharacteristically. The threatening sound and the hostility of his gaze frightened you terribly. He bared his fangs and backed you into a corner, taking your shoulders into his claws.

“I _never_ asked for you to save me! I _never_ needed, _never_ wanted you to save me! Your heroinism was an act of pure stupidity. You’re an absolute fool to think I am grateful for your selfish decision to sacrifice your life for mine!”

“It’s because I love you!”

“And I _never_ asked to love you!”

“But don’t you?”

By the sound of your broken voice, Lotor faltered. He immediately released his grip on you and stumbled back, anger completely shattered by the sight of your anguished cries.

“(Y/N)…I—”

“I’m not going to live forever. Of course I’d give my life for yours,” you sobbed.

You hugged yourself to stop from completely falling over. Lotor caught you, wrapping his arms around you with a petrified stare. He struggled to speak, but his embrace was enough to comfort you. You missed his touch _so much_.

“I love you so much I can hardly stand it,” you confessed.

“I’m sorry, my love. I’m so sorry,” he whispered.

He tightened his hold, bringing you both to the ground so that he could completely engulf you in his arms.

“Why were you so cruel to me?”

“I was…my anger towards you is inexcusable. After you were injured by my father…I thought I lost you. Your impulsivity only puts you at greater risk. That’s when I realized…as emperor, you’re in greater danger. Sendak won’t hesitate to take you away from me and kill you. I had to keep you close…even at the cost of restricting your freedom.”

“So you punished me by making me believe that you didn’t love me anymore?”

“I know and I’m sorry.” Lotor took your face into his hands, kissing each tear away. “(Y/N), never doubt that I love you.”

You leaned into his touch. A wave of relief rushed over you. You could feel his sincerity again.

“We’re so close to peace, my love. Just wait a little longer…and trust me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***WARNING: Conversations of unplanned pregnancy.


	22. Everything I Am [♡]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • Mercy – Hurts  
> • Where's My Love (Alternate Version) - SYML  
> • Closer – J2/Keeley Bumford 
> 
> I heard a trailer for Season 8's supposed to drop this week...let's hope Lotor's in it. :^) 
> 
> WARNING: Makeup sex scene ~

There was no room for doubt. Lotor wouldn’t allow it. He fully intended to burn the intensity of his devotion in your mind _and_ on your body. With how much you were willing to give, he seized every opportunity to have dominion over you. That is exactly why your voice had been taken—throat dry and coarse from never-ending cries and screams.

“Tell me, (Y/N)—tell me how much you missed the feeling of my cock inside of you.”

You could only whine. So, he drew out your moans by ramming his hips against yours. The speed of his thrusts allowed him to push further into you.

“God, Lotor— _fuck_! Mmm! Yes, yes!”

One of Lotor’s claws was sunken deep into your hips, the other toying with your clit.  When he withdrew them to lift your back from the bed, you began to miss the stinging pain. He had taken you on almost every surface of his chambers: the couches, study table, counters. The bed served as a comfortable stop in between each transition. He prompted you to wrap your legs around his waist, allowing him to carry you with himself still inside of you.

You shyly looked over your shoulder. You could see your breathless form in the mirror--back adorned with bite marks and bruises. Your eyes traveled to Lotor’s expression; cheeks flushed in a deep purple and his mouth parted to release uneven breaths. He was absolutely taken with lust. And when your eyes met, you only encouraged his animalistic behavior.  

He lowered your feet to the ground, positioning you so that your face was pressed to the mirror. His eyes eagerly devoured your behind as his hands mapped your lower half. He smirked, experimentally slipping his fingers inside of you.

You gasped, wriggling your hips to feel for his erection. “Lotor, _please_.”

“I love it when you beg for me, darling,” he purred. His left hand slowly ran up the lining of your back then through your hair to forcefully bring your ear to his lips. “But try again.”

Even when he took you from behind, the mirror allowed you to lock eyes and read each other’s expressions. Lotor knew you loved watching him fuck you. That’s why it was his favorite spot too.

“My emperor!” you wailed.

“There it is,” he whispered, shoving himself back in your pulsating walls.

Lotor’s groans and the slapping of your skin echoed off the walls. You listened to the sweet and vulgar sounds of your lovemaking. The mix of your arousal and Lotor’s seed ran from your connection down to your legs. You’d forgotten how many times you came, considering that you two had been at it for quite some time.

“Please—please don’t stop!”

“I have no intention of the sort. Look, darling. I want you to etch this image in your mind,” he said. "Witness my love as a _fuck_ you." He continued to tug at your hair, the other hand traveling over your front to pinch and squeeze at your pert nipples. When you moaned, he immediately bit down on the nape of your neck. All this with his merciless thrusts brought you to another orgasm and squirt.

You swore, he enjoyed torturing you.

“Then you must think of me, my emperor.” With what strength you had left, you turned to kiss him. "When you're alone, remember the way I scream your name." 

With a groan, Lotor’s eyes slipped closed. “Being my mate really becomes you, love.” With one final jerk of his hips, he shuddered and came inside you again.

You whimpered at the feeling of being filled; you never got used to the warm thickness of his load.

Lotor guided you back to the bed, brushed your hair aside, and then peppered kisses to your face. His hands stayed on your cheeks, leaving your lips last. He loved the glow you had from endearing affections in the aftermath of sex.

“When we access the rift, I promise you, our wedding will be imminent.”

“We don’t have to rush.”

“I’ve spent an eternity waiting for the realization of my plans. Ironically, I don’t think I can wait a tick longer to completely have you as mine,” he chuckled.

Giving you one last kiss, he stood from the bed. You turned onto your stomach and rested your cheek against a pillow. You watched him lazily through hooded eyes, admiring every flex and the curvature of his muscles. You had to thank whatever higher power for giving you such a specimen.

Lotor returned with a tray, motioning you to drink and eat. You rose slowly, lower half still sore from sex. He chuckled, pulling you to his chest. When you licked the frosting of your pastry, he grabbed your wrist. 

“Careful, love,” he warned. “Be kind to your body by being mindful of mine.”

“What? I’m just tasting it.”

“You leave chaos in your wake when you ‘taste things’.”

You rolled your eyes, finishing Lotor’s provisions and tucking yourself in. Lotor followed and pulled you into his arms.

“When it’s just the two of us, my soul is at peace…”

Your heart skipped a beat.

“Thank you, (Y/N).”

You wished you could tell him it wasn’t just the two of you.

 

* * *

 

Having Dayak attend to your duties gave you the opportunity to relax and truly appreciate the positives on your life. Lotor was emperor, working toward his lifelong goals with the Paladins—your close friends. Matt and Commander Holt were safe, and Earth would be protected under Lotor’s jurisdiction. Soon, the universe will finally know peace.

As you wished, Lotor finally granted you the ability to travel. Eylek and Groven were given the proper sanctions to take you from point A to point B. Only…you didn’t have a reason to travel without Lotor. You had no interest in other places besides the Castle of Lions, which is where Lotor would bring you anyway. The coalition’s medical HQ was being overseen by the Olkari, and Dayak took your place as diplomatic envoy.  So…all you could do was hang around.

“Are you out of your quiznaking mind? You’ve played as a paladin 5 times in a row!”

“Don’t bother, Coran. You know Shiro. When his mind’s made up, it’s made up.”

Shiro sat back and sighed. “Thank you, Lance!”

You walked into the lounge, confused by the set up. “You all playing Dungeons and Dragons?”  

“ _MONSTERS AND MANA!_ That’s it—I need a mental break too,” Coran grumbled as he stormed out the room.

You blinked twice. “What’s his problem?”

“Don’t worry about it,” Shiro laughed. “Just playing a game.”

“Yeah! Wish you joined us, (Y/N).” Lance said. “It was pretty fun.”

“Maybe next time! I just finished organizing all my files. I’ve been so bored lately that I actually get caught up in doing whatever comes my way.”

“Sounds like you haven’t been doing any training lately. You should really get those muscles working, (Y/N).”

You gulped.

“I think I’ll pass—”

Shiro cut you off, already exiting the room for you to follow. “C’mon. It’ll be good for you! Lance, you coming?”

“Nah, I just finished my work out. See you guys after my nap.”

 

* * *

 

“All right—no holding back. If you can punch a hole in Zarkon, then that means you can take on Sendak. Which means I should try to take you down.”

God, what were you supposed to do? You couldn’t tell him no—it’s not like Shiro could singlehandedly bring you down. But with your child in mind…

Just subdue him and that’ll be the end of it. Then he’ll be off your back to train some more.

You readied yourself in a fighting stance, signaling him to come at you.

Shiro ran forward, activating his robotic arm and jabbing it in your direction. You dodged, side stepping to grab his other arm. He anticipated your move, back kicking with his left leg and round housing you with his right. You blocked his kick with your arms crossed, forcing him back with the quintessence in your forearms.  He flew back and landed on his knee with a laugh.

“Quit holding back!”

“I’m just on the defensive,” you retorted.

“Then turn _offensive_!”

With a grunt, he surged forward. Your best bet to counter his attack would be to punch the environment, but Coran would’ve killed you for putting a hole through the deck for a third time. Shiro thrusted his arm at you over and over, but he was too quick to catch. Your eyes couldn’t keep up.

“C’mon, (Y/N)! _Fight!_ ”

You were starting to lose your breath. Why was dodging so much more tiring than fighting?

“I said, _fight_!”

His knee hurled toward your torso, suddenly provoking your aggression. You caught his leg, effectively throwing him across the room. You winced when he hit the wall, but you had to protect your child.

“Whoa,” he chuckled. “Maybe I should just aim there then. Still got food poisoning?”

“Yeah. It’s just…best to not trigger my stomach. Looks like you need more training.”

“Apparently so. Mind still helping me out?”

“Ah, maybe later.”

“Before you’d be the one to ask me for help in combat training. I think you owe me one,” he pressed.  

“Shiro, I’m really tired—”

“Nonsense! Looking at my scanners, you’re perfectly—”

Damn.

You’d forgotten you were still synced to the Paladin’s bioscanners.

“(Y/N)…why am I reading two heartbeats?”

You bit your lip, fumbling with the belt of your armor.

Shiro’s stare hardened.

“You’re pregnant.”

Your eyes were locked to the ground.

“Does Lotor know?”

“No. No one knows except Dayak. But please, Shiro, you can’t tell anyone. Not until I tell him first.”

“(Y/N), this is a big deal. You’re his Captain of the Guard. No matter how you look at it, it’s your life before his. If something happens—”

“Nothing will happen. Dayak’s relieved me of my duties for the time being.”

“How long can you keep that up before Lotor suspects something? How long are you planning on keeping this a secret?”

“I don’t know. He’s busy as it is. He needs to focus on saving the universe first.”

“This is exactly why I was against you joining his guard from the start. All he cares about is—”

“Shiro, _please_ listen to me! I know how this looks but I know what I’m doing. If we all continue working to access the quintessence field, it’ll mean peace. I want to make sure our child is born into a peaceful universe…”

Shiro tried to protest but instead, nodded at your words. “Okay,” he whispered. “If you know what you’re doing…”

“I do. This is the right choice.”

“And no one else knows?”

“Besides you and Dayak…no one.”

“Man…so I’m going to be an uncle, huh?” You smiled softly at him, allowing him to speak to your stomach. “Sorry. My first impression was a little more violent than I wanted.”

“They’re going to have to be a great warrior anyway, just like their father,” you beamed.

“And they’ll be kind and caring, just like their mom.”

 

* * *

 

Lotor didn’t join you in bed for tonight.

The Sincline ships were almost finished—he could rest plenty after.

The Empire had already undergone so much change. Peaceful negotiations, sustainable harvests and pacified soldiers. Everything was taking a turn for the better. The Galra Empire was becoming unrecognizable in the best way.

The removal of Haggar and the druids was one of your biggest concerns. Much rehabilitation was needed to be conducted on her surviving prisoners. Many facilities were linked to one another, so you had plenty of people to tend to. These people were your kin—you all shared the same pained experiences.

Shiro proposed that you both comanage this project. His input was invaluable and with his help, you were able to recognize and locate many prisoners that had been sent to Haggar to be turned into robeasts.

The concept was terrifying. If the Proto Project failed, you would’ve met the fate of a robeast—encapsulated as a monster inside of a machine.

You’ve endured horrors, but you were still you. Shiro was still Shiro and the Holts were alive and well. You all needed and had made the best out of your situation.

Lounging on Lotor’s bed, you reviewed the information on robeasts one last time.

“There are still some prisoners unconscious from experimentation,” you mumbled. “We’ll just have to be thorough in our search…”

Almost every research facility concerning quintessence had been abandoned. Among those facilities was the one where you’ve been imprisoned. According to both Lotor and the files, you were the last living subject. Still, it wouldn’t hurt to reread your information.

_The Proto Project: Subdivision of the quintessence research branch of Biological Infusions. Objective: Produce lifeform with enhanced abilities post-quintessence infusion. Mental capacity and emotional drive must remain intact. Means of force and subjugation are not limited to—_

Scroll.

_Subject Proto 1 – Failed to respond physically and orally after first infusion. Deceased._

Scroll.

_Subject Proto 5 – Lost all physiological abilities after 2 quintants. Permanently Incapacitated._

_Subject Proto 19 – Deceased upon 3 ticks into transfusion._

Scroll again.

_Subject Proto 37 – Enhanced speed. Prolonged usage of abilities resulted in physical overexertion. Deceased._

…

_Subject Proto 79 – Decased. Subject Proto 124 – Deceased. Subject Proto 242 – Deceased. Subject Proto 398 – Subject is responsive after first phoebe of infusion. Resistance met with bonds and restriction of facial movement. Enhanced abilities consist of profound strength._

This is you.

_Subject able to perform exceptionally on physical trials. Able to lift 7 times its strength under life-threatening conditions. IQ and emotional drive stagnant from first physical examination. Subject’s personal quintessence usage statistic is yet to be determined._

“So, they forced the quintessence out of me.” 

Much different to Lotor's gradual approach. 

_Subject is able to control output of quintessence. Objective achieved. Further protocol yet to be received from High Priestess Haggar to proceed with military implementation._

No further information.

Did Lotor save you at the right time? If he had arrived only a day later…

You realized…

…what _exactly_ did Lotor discover _through you_?

All those trials and simulations—what did reaching 100% capacity mean? You knew he needed Allura’s Altean alchemic abilities to build special ships, but what you provided was still an ambiguity. You never found out.  Perhaps along the way, Lotor ended up not needing your involvement or reaching 100% was the sole goal.

_Because of you, I’ve learned much. I have you to thank for that…and so much more._

Whatever the reason, your priorities have changed. Before, all that mattered was your survival. Then Lotor’s, and now your child’s.

In exchange for your undying fidelity, he had given you purpose and love—a love that had manifested and grew within you. Concerning yourself with the past wouldn’t make your child’s future any brighter. Lotor’s was the Emperor of the Galra Empire—the most powerful figurehead in the universe; and he was doing everything in his power to ensure a new day of peace.

You trusted him.

 


	23. Under Haunted Skies

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • Turning Tables – Savannah Outen   
> • Astronomical – Svrcina   
> • Calling Out – Christian Reindl/Atrel 
> 
> We're almost to the end of the series. T_T

“Beginning system check. Front and rear stabilizers.”

“Front and rear stabilizers are go.”

“Quintessence collection array.”

“Quintessence collection array is go.”

“Infracells.”

“Infracells up.”

“Dynotherms.”

“Dynotherms connected.”

“Switching on mega-thrusters.”

“Mega-thrusters are go.”

They've done it. Allura and Lotor had finally completed building the Sincline's ships. This time tomorrow, the universe would be changed for the better. However, no one shared your excitement. The look on everyone’s face was grim. It had been several months, but it was clear. The Paladins _still_ didn’t trust Lotor. Granted, the quintessence rift was a dangerous place—anything could happen. But what concern they had for Allura, you had for Lotor. The success of this voyage was crucial. They needed to be safe not just for all of you, but for every living being in the universe.

You stood by Shiro and the others on the Castle’s bridge. Anxiously watching the launch bay’s feed, your eyes were locked onto the Sincline’s vitals.

“Okay, I can’t be the only one who sees that this is nuts, right?” Hunk asked. “I mean, just getting in there is a long shot. Then they have to make it out again?”

“I agree with Hunk. This plan is a foolhardy and unnecessary risk,” Coran said.

Pidge crossed her arms. “I don’t know. I mean, we traveled through the quintessence field to another reality. This isn’t just theoretical physics. Mathematically, we know it’s possible.”

“Well, it is hard to argue with math. Believe me, I’ve tried.”

“But even if they do reach the quintessence field, then what? The last time anyone got in there, it turned Zarkon evil.”

“Lance makes a fine point! Take that, math!”

“Zarkon fell prey to his own evil instincts. The quintessence field didn’t create them, it revealed them,” Shiro said.

You placed your hand on your hip and sighed, “It’s already too late to stop them anyway. The only thing we can do is cross our fingers and hope. We have to believe they’re going to be okay.”

I can’t raise this child without you, Lotor, you thought.

“So, this is goodbye…for now,” Coran said.

The Sincline ship launched, heading straight for the trans-reality gate on Daibazaal. As Coran counted down the time to their entry, you held onto Shiro’s arm. When they entered the rift, Shiro squeezed your hand.

“It’s going to be okay, (Y/N),” he whispered.

The momentary silence came to an abrupt halt by the sound of the Castle alarms.

“I’ve got an incoming craft!”

“Shields up. And pull it up on-screen,” Shiro ordered.

All the color drained from Coran’s face. “That…that can’t be. It’s an Altean pod! A really old one!”

“What’s it doing out here?” Lance asked.

Shiro released himself from you, edging closer to the screen. “Let’s find out. Attention, Altean pod, identify yourself.”

“Shiro, it’s Keith.”

Well, this was unexpected. Keith had the habit of making an appearance at the uncanniest times. He’d been gone for months without contact. The surprise wasn’t without question.

“Keith! Ah, I—are you okay?”

“Where have you been?”

“And how did you get your hands on that pod?”

“Does he look bigger to your guys? He’s bigger right? No?”

You had to admit, Lance was right. Months away shouldn’t have caused a growth spurt.

“Where’s (Y/N)?” Keith asked urgently.

“I’m right here. Keith, what’s wrong?”

“Good. You’re safe.”

“I’m fine. But what about you? How are you?”

Keith ignored your questions. “Where’s Lotor?”

“He’s in the quintessence field,” Hunk answered.

“No…!”

 

* * *

 

You and the others rushed to the launch bay. Something was wrong. If there was a need for Keith to suddenly appear, _and_ ask questions regarding to Lotor, he had discovered something important. As soon as Keith stepped off the pod, he made headway towards you.

“We need to stop Lotor. He’s been lying to all of us!”

"I-I don't follow," you said. 

“Wh-lying about what?” Shiro asked.

“ _Everything_!”

Behind Keith was an unfamiliar posse—a Galran, Altean, and…a wolf? For once, couldn’t your space adventures come with context?

_What the hell was going on?_

“I promise I’ll explain everything once we get to Lotor.”

“Keith, you can’t expect me to stand aside and let you take him,” you said.

 “We can’t get to him anyways,” Pidge said. “He just entered the quintessence field with Allura.”

“We traveled through realities before. Can’t we just fly in there and attack?”

“ _Attack_?” Why did it feel like no one was listening to you?

Lance stepped to Keith. “She said Allura is with him. We can’t risk hurting her.”

Your body tensed with fury. “ _Or Lotor_! You’ll explain everything now. I won’t let you any of you touch him until you do.”

Shiro pulled your arm back. “Look, (Y/N), Keith—everyone, calm down. When they return, we’ll get this all sorted out.”

Keith frowned, attempting to reach for you. When you jerked away, he clicked his tongue. “(Y/N), please. I need you to trust me.”

 _Trust_.

The Galra woman stepped toward you and Shiro, extending her hand. “(Y/N), Shiro, I am Krolia. Keith has told me all about you. Thank you for raising him to be the man he is today.”

“Krolia is with the Blade of Marmora. Also…she’s my mother.”

Your eyes widened. “Your mother? Oh, I—”

Shiro could tell you were flustered from your previous outburst. “It’s an honor to meet you—”

“ _WHAT?_ Okay, this is nuts! You come back with your Galra mom, a wolf, and an Altean?” Lance exclaimed.

“This is Romelle, and I think she should tell her own story,” Keith said.

“I come from a planet where there are thousands of Alteans. We have lived there since the war with Zarkon began.”

“What? That’s impossible. Altea was destroyed—Allura and I were the only survivors,” Coran said in disbelief.  

“Every Altean child knows the story of how Lotor saved us from destruction. When Zarkon attacked, many were off-planet on trading expeditions. When news spread about the destruction of our home, those of us who remained went into hiding for deca-phoebs. But Lotor, with his deep knowledge of Altean culture, managed to track some of them down. To keep the Alteans secure, Lotor hid them on a remote planet beyond the quantum abyss. And over time, the Alteans came to worship Lotor as their savior. Generations ago, in an effort to increase our odds of survival, Lotor announced that he was creating another colony far from our own. But in order to do so, he needed to assess which Alteans were viable candidates to survive the journey. One by one, every Altean in the colony was given a series of tests. Those who were deemed fit for the journey were loaded onto a cargo ship and taken to the second colony. It was considered the highest honor. Any communication between the colonies was strictly prohibited for fear that it would compromise the other’s location. This was the world I was born into: one of unquestioning devotion to a supposed messiah.”

Your heart froze.

_It’s an honor to be Prince Lotor’s guest._

The highest honor.

 _If I return you home, there is the possibility they will find you_ and _your people…You cannot return home._

Isolation.

 _I will be putting you through a series of trials to measure how strong you really are_.

 Testing.

_You protected me. Now, I’ll protect you. I’ll follow you anywhere._

Unquestioning devotion.

Romelle’s story was all too familiar. Horrifically familiar. You didn’t want to hear any more of it—you didn’t want to hear the rest of Romelle’s story, but you needed to know.

You needed to know if Lotor was using you.

“I knew the truth, or at least part of it, but I also knew that no one would believe me without proof. When Keith and Krolia arrived, they were my last chance at finding it. I told them what had happened to my brother, and as it turned out, so many Alteans that had been taken before him. As they explained their mission to me, we knew there must have been a connection between the Alteans and the pure strain of quintessence.”

 “…What were they taken for?” you asked quietly.

“Lotor was harvesting their quintessence,” Keith answered. “He’s a monster.”

“(Y/N), please tell me you didn’t know about this,” Shiro pleaded.

Your eyes widened in realization. “The Rajex System.”

“What?”

“The Rajex System. Lotor went there by himself every other phoeb. No sentries, no escorts, not even his generals. Every time I asked him about it, he shut me down. That must’ve been where the colony was.”

No one knew. How could they? He had taken every single Altean, so no one questioned their extinction—the same way no one questioned the Proto Project’s whereabouts. You knew there had to be a correlation between you and the colony—but what was it?

“I have good reason to believe that Lotor intends to use (Y/N)’s quintessence just like he used the Alteans’. We need to make sure he doesn’t use hers or anyone’s ever again,” Keith said.

You couldn’t breathe.

So, it was true. All this time…Lotor had been using you. Every title you had—prisoner, test subject, friend, lover….He saw you one-dimensionally. Lotor only saw your quintessence.

You were a potential energy source. 

“They’re back,” Coran announced.

Romelle pushed passed you. “What are you waiting for? Open fire!”

“No! Princess Allura is with him!”

“We’re gonna let them back onboard?”

“We must! As long as the princess is with him, we cannot risk any sort of attack.”

Shiro stood in front of you protectively. “Coran and Lance are right. We can’t do anything until the princess is safe. Once Allura is secure, we will take Lotor down. Hunk, Pidge, keep (Y/N) _away_ from Lotor.”

You couldn’t bring yourself to protest. Your heartbreak didn’t allow you to. Orders and commands had turned into muffled sounds. All you could hear was the thumping of your heart. But you didn’t share everyone’s anger. Even if he deceived you, you couldn’t bring yourself to raise your hand in aggression.  

You still loved him.

You truly loved him, despite of everything.

You couldn’t hate him for that. You hated yourself.

The moment the bridge’s doors opened, everyone raised their weapons to Lotor. The sight before you made you clutch to your chest agony. Your comrades had the intention of seizing and even _killing_ him. Meanwhile, you were helpless.

“Allura, step away from Lotor,” Lance said.

“I will do no such thing! Tell me what’s happening here.”

“Lotor is a monster and has been harvesting Altean quintessence for generations! You killed my brother and thousands of others.”

Pidge squeezed your hand. “Lotor has been lying to us the whole time. He’s a murderer, just like his father!”

No. You’re wrong.

Move, (Y/N). Say something! Anything—Lotor needed you, now more than ever.

And yet, you remained silent. You could only release tears of frustration.

“You know nothing about what you speak.”

“What are they talking about?”

“Allura, listen to me. I’ve dedicated my life to preserving Altean culture. Now that we have unlocked the quintessence field, all of your people, who would have been hunted down long ago had it not been for my intervention, can live in peace. Were some lives lost in the process? Yes. But they were martyrs to a noble cause. I sacrificed a few to preserve the future for millions.”

Lotor…

Why wasn’t he looking to you? Why was he pleading with Allura? Your existence was the perfect alibi, you would’ve gladly vouched for him. You were always ready to protect him, lay down your life so that he could continue making the universe a better place. Once glance from him was all you needed to find your strength.

The more he pleaded, the more he tore at your heart.                               

“Allura, do not let this ruin everything we worked for.”

_Look at me._

“Think of what we experienced in the quintessence field.”

_Think of our child…!_

Allura seethed, taking Lotor’s arm and throwing him to the ground and knocking him unconscious.

You couldn’t move. The heartbreak of betrayal had finally taken you.

“Lotor…”

A distant explosion stole your broken gaze. “The hangar’s been breached!”

“It’s Lotor’s troops. They’re stealing the ships!”

You looked to the launch bay’s feed, gritting your teeth. “Axca and Ezor? Why now?!”

Shiro suddenly cried out in pain, falling to his knees.

“S-Shiro..!” Your legs refused to move. Even at the sight of your best friend in anguish.

Your heart and mind were much too overstimulated. Everything was racing painfully fast. You needed someone to tell you what to do – you needed to grasp rationality. You didn’t need trust, to hell with trust. What could you possibly do in this moment of pandemonium?

You needed Lotor.

“Allura and I will secure Lotor. Hunk, (Y/N), help Shiro. Everyone else, get down to the hangar and stop those guys,” Lance ordered.

You looked to Shiro, but a sudden, uncharacteristic growl left him. In the blink of an eye, he had thrown Hunk across the room at Coran, then punched Lance to the wall. “Shiro, what are you doing?!” you cried. Soon enough, he landed his fist on Allura and Romelle.

You grunted, pushing through anxiety to run and protect Lotor. “Shiro, _stop_!”

“I’m taking you with me.”

This wasn’t your Shiro. He’d never hurt anyone, _ever_. But behind you was also a man you thought you knew. You were caught between two people you loved. Everything was falling apart—what was left for you?

You closed your eyes, letting your arms fall.

_You won’t get through this alone. I promise._

“This isn’t you.”

Shiro’s arm made impact to your womb, turning your whole world black.


	24. It All Fell Down

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • Dynamite (Acoustic) – Sigrid  
> • Dynasty – MIIA (3/4 of the major songs!)  
> • I Know You – Skylar Grey
> 
> Dynasty's the major song, but please take a listen to Dynamite when you see this ***

_You followed the trail of blood._

_Piercing screams echoed throughout the corridor. When the volume increased, you knew that the voice had to be behind one of the closed doors. This was the third level, so there was no reason for you to be reprimanded for prying._

_You pressed your ear against the door closest to the end of the corridor._

_“Please, my lord! Don’t!”_

_“It needs to be done. Otherwise the rot will spread.”_

_Lotor—he had returned from his expedition on Planet Kipin. Judging by the swiftness of his return, he had resorted to conquering the Kipinians through violent measures._

_You opened the door slightly, seeing Lotor and several medics surrounding the private. The trail led to the private’s left knee, which had been brutally disfigured. The medics frantically searched through cabinets and drawers. Lotor supported the private’s head, prompting him with words to calm down._

_“Sir, our supply of Lyran extract is low.”_

_“What are you waiting for? Use it.”_

_“All that remains is our reserves—the purest content of extract. The intensity of its effects may worsen the rot.”_

_Without thinking, you barged into the room. You pushed Lotor aside, taking the vial around your neck and pouring its contents over the affected area. The private whimpered, watching the opened skin slowly return to its original form. It wasn’t completely healed, but the rot had miraculously disappeared._

_“We need to reposition him to lateral right recumbent.”_

_When no one moved, you rolled your eyes._

_“Lay him on his right. We need to take the pressure off his leg otherwise it’ll result in unnecessary bruising. You—I need ice, gloves, and a suture kit. I need to close the wound to let it properly heal. The Lyran extract isn’t enough. We need to help his cells do the work.”_

_“My lord—”_

_“I need you to be quiet. All your thrashing is the reason why the rot spread so quickly. Why’s everyone staring? Get to it, stat!”_

 

* * *

 

_The energy that emanated from behind you was…disconcerting. Drying your hands with a towel, you quietly turned._

_“Are you mad at me?”_

_“On the contrary. You saved that man’s leg.”_

_“So, you’re not mad?”_

_“I said I wasn’t. You acted on instinct. Had you not done so, we would’ve resorted to cutting his leg off.”_

_“How did that happen in the first place?”_

_“Trovar and I didn’t anticipate the Kipinians using biochemical warfare. We were careless.”_

_“Did anyone else get hurt?”_

_“No. Just the one. Fortunately, our terrain hovercrafts could withstand the toxicity. By Zethrid’s orders, she sent the private to scout the area. I’ll have her reprimanded for endangering his life unnecessarily.”_

_“Maybe…you don’t have to conquer Kipin? Just…take away their transportation so they won’t be able to reach Qohrl.”_

_“That’s exactly what we’ve done. When we take Qohrl, we’ll wait another deca-phoeb until we take Kipin again.”_

_You sighed, rubbing your arm awkwardly._

_“This is the way of the Galra, (Y/N). I know you might not agree to it, but if you’re to stay by my side…you’ll have to get used to it.”_

_“I know. You don’t have to keep reminding me.”_

_Lotor closed the space between you, pulling you toward him to could circle his arms around your waist. His eyes studied your features while you blushed._

“You’re going to be all right, little one.”

Everything around you faded like a dream. All except Lotor, who still held you close. Instead of the tinge of your heart, a sharp pain shot from your stomach to your legs. You came to with a gasp, reaching to hold your womb.

“No…Lotor—”

He hushed you, caressing your hair before placing a soft kiss to your forehead. But this loving act wasn’t enough to dull your pain.

“You’re going to be all right.” Without another word, Lotor laid you down on a hard surface and pulled a glass top over you. You called to his retreating figure, but you were too incapacitated to move.

The last thing you could recall was Shiro’s sudden change. After that, nothing. To the extent of your knowledge, Lotor had brought you into the Sincline and removed your armor. He had entrapped you in a glass case, a feature of the Sincline unbeknownst to you. Was this some sort of healing pod?

The baby.

Had you been taken to a safe place?

The Sincline jolted, causing you to turn your side and gasp out. Unsteady breaths weren’t going to help, so you tried to suppress the pain by slowing your breathing. The aching feeling had stolen your consciousness every so often. When you woke, voices echoed from the intercom.  

“—tor don’t do this!”

 _Axca_?

The Sincline shook, tossing you against the glass walls. The movement was fast, unsteady. What was going on outside—and more importantly, why did Lotor feel the need to confine you in this box?

“This ends now.”

The walls illuminated a bright yellow, a warmth radiating from below you. It intensified, the warmth growing to an unbearable heat. Your skin stung from the burn and soon, it began to feel as if your entire body was engulfed in flames. In a panic, you pushed against the walls, but the glass burnt the skin of your hands. You kicked, screamed, and punched—but the walls somehow withstood your strength. But you realized…the walls weren’t strong. You were growing weak.

This encasement was draining you of quintessence.

“It didn’t have to end like this, but you’ve made your choice.”

No…

Lotor was fighting the Paladins.

Stripping you of your armor and communications guaranteed your subjugation and quintessence extraction.

You _screamed_. Your own cries and shrieks had deafened you. Every emotion escaped you—agony, betrayal and heartbreak. You needed to stop Lotor—by whatever means you could. Soon, your knuckles and soles bled from your beatings but not before the encasement grew hot again.

He was charging another beam.

“Lotor! Lotor, _please!_ ”  

Every cell in your body burned. Having to frequent so much energy from the trans-reality ore _and_ you— this what reaching 100% capacity meant. Now, you understood. Undergoing those rigorous tests meant that he could extract your strength at will.

“Lotor, _stop_ …”

You couldn’t catch a break. Eventually, you just simply laid there…letting him take everything from you. When was the last time you’ve felt a pain this excruciating?

The Galra research facility…where Lotor had taken you. A place you thought he saved you from. Only this time, there was no way of knowing you could survive the brutality of his wrath.

Is this the fate he had originally designed for you—to be drained until there was nothing left to give?

 “Now we will see how Alfor’s legacy stands against the new Altean defender,” Lotor growled.

This had been his plan from the start. It was never about the Galra. His notion of peace had always been beyond you, beyond Voltron, beyond the universe. You’ve fulfilled your purpose by remaining at his side until this very moment, and you were to do so until he decided otherwise.

“All unlimited power is mine. All realities will fall to the new Altean Empire!”

The Sincline’s metal clashed and screeched. There was a desperation behind its movements. He was losing, and you dreaded his decision to counter Voltron.

A new light shone from below you—a purple glow. The volatility was not to burn you, but to harvest the rest of your vitality. You much preferred the burn. The pull felt like you were being torn limb from limb, muscles constricting and nerves breaking apart. Your abdomen stretched apart. In fear, you curled to protect your baby. The encasement took and gave, indicating that Lotor was making multiple jumps between realities. The Sincline’s constant absorption of your power made you suffocate.

“I underestimated you, princess.”

Allura.

Your head hung low. Both of you had been a pawn to Lotor’s game. If she could fight him on the outside, you needed to do everything you can from the inside.

Before you braced yourself for another strain, you held your breath. Instead, you felt your being suddenly rejuvenate. You felt…better? Not completely revitalized, but strong enough to break the glass.

After the multitude of assaults to your body, you lost hope. Your hand traveled down, feeling for the wound Shiro had inflicted. The bleeding had stopped. But you had no means of finding their heartbeat. [***](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bxWyrs53T2o)

“I’m so sorry, sweetheart,” you whimpered. 

“Poor Allura—all the power in the universe at your fingertips and you _still_ fear using it.”

The quintessence field, you realized.  That’s the only reason behind your revival. And you were not going to lose this opportunity.

“ _You will not use me for this_.”  

Harnessing the rest of your quintessence, you pushed the glass top and fell harshly to the ground. The encasement was linked to _hundreds_ of wires, each one specifically made to transport your energy like a battery. You clutched to your stomach, treading through bloodied soles and a broken soul.

As you panted, a flurry of memories returned to you.

“Lotor…”

Malicious laughter, murderous intent. This _wasn’t_ him.

After everything you’ve been through—what fool would believe that this was his true nature? Of course not. You could only remember the love behind his eyes and gentleness of his touch.

Even after all this…you wanted to be by him.

Unconditionally, you promised. You loved him with every fiber of your being. And if there was even an ounce of love still left for you, you believed it was still within him. No amount of quintessence could change that.

You trudged to the helm, falling victim to the Sincline’s harsh turns. You fell to your knees, only using your left arm to support yourself against the floors and walls. The agonizing pain returned to you every part of your body, but you _continued_. Through tears and stolen breaths, you pushed yourself.

_He needed you._

When you reached the helm, you were greeted by wicked screams.

No, this was Lotor. For better or worse, fixed and broken, you’ve made the decision to love him through it all. You just needed to bring him back.

As Lotor attempted to land one final attack, you gently placed you hands alongside his face. “Lotor…” He tensed, still screaming but you would not move. “Lotor, _please_ …I’m right here.”

You distracted him long enough for Voltron to end the battle, a beam of quintessence shooting through the Sincline to finally subdue it. Unconscious, he fell against you. You clutched him to your chest, allowing your back to take the shockwaves. You winced in pain, laying Lotor to the ground then turning your attention to the controls. In the Sincline’s current state, you weren’t sure if they were going to reach them.

“…hailing…Paladins of Voltron…”

Static.

“(Y/N)--?! (Y/N), _what are you doing there_?!”

“Keith,” you panted. “I can deactivate the Sincline.”

"What? No! There's got to be a way to--" 

“You need to get out of here.”

“ _No_! _Not without you_!”

 “I can’t leave him.   _I’ll never leave him_.”

“(Y/N)—”

“Go, please. And tell Shiro…I’m sorry.”

“…I will.”

“Thank you, Keith.”

You immediately shut down communications, collapsing to your knees. You sobbed into your hands. Saying goodbye for a second time would only shatter your heart more than it did now.

Lotor had been defeated.

Everything he built and suffered for had been taken from him in just a day.

But he still had you.

You weren’t sure you were any consolation…in fact, you were no consolation at all. But god forbid you’d abandon him like the rest.

“Lotor…”

Waves of pain went through your body as you struggled to crawl to him. Only bits of quintessence enabled you to push yourself. When you finally reached him at a fingertips’ distance, tears slipped from your eyes. You grabbed at his hand and squeezed.

You could feel yourself being lost to the power of the quintessence field. But the feeling drawn out was not vindictive—it was loneliness. You closed your eyes and leaned forward to press your forehead against his.

A small laugh escaped your lips. Even in sleep, he looked so peaceful.

“…we should’ve stayed on Lyra.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> T__T We've reached the end (for now). This was the most heartbreaking chapter to write so far. And listening to Dynamite while doing it? UGH rip my heart. Thank you so much to everyone for reading this, it means a lot. At this point, it's hard to determine if MC and Lotor will have a happy ending. Let's hope that NYCC will drop a Season 8 trailer that features our purple boy.


	25. SEASON 8 UPDATE!

Let me start first by saying thank you so much to everyone for reading Dreams of Another Reality! As you may or may not know, a [trailer for S8](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gcD2Zg1nUF4) dropped for NYCC and thank the ancients (no spoiler), Lotor was featured in it! <3 However, since we do not know how the series will unfold, **I will not be able to update DoAR until after December 14th**. 

In the meantime, I'd love to continue writing oneshots for DoAR! Feel free to request anything - plot expansion (pre-Kerberos/the generals/Paladin shenanigans), headcanons, smut ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) It doesn't necessarily have to be for DoAR either! I'd be glad to write for any character. I do reserve the right to deny certain requests, though. 

Thank you once again for reading DoAR and good luck on our last pre-season stretch! <3 

\+ [Playlist for ya feels ](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)

+ [Official Trailer](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ltUs2qYl1XU)

\+ [Will MC/Lotor's bb be cute as this? ](https://66.media.tumblr.com/2b77e7839ceea43975a4e11d492274b1/tumblr_pg5shp56Ev1raggz8o1_540.png)

\+ [Also yay they added Eylek and Groven to the NYCC poster lmao ](https://66.media.tumblr.com/8fab65d3f6d90d92a84d16626955d046/tumblr_pg6xid6jMm1um3r3b_540.jpg)

 

 

 


	26. The Sun and Moon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • Sun & Moon – Above & Beyond  
> • Lion & Beggar - Parisian   
> • Scared to be Lonely (Acoustic) – Martin Garrix/Dua Lipa 
> 
> Hi, friends. How about that S8, huh? LMAO......  
> Well, I considered all possibilities except for what actually happened. Who cares about canon, y'know? Lowkey, updates won't be as frequent as the first two parts of this fic. At this point, feel free to give insight as to how you see this story pan out/what you'd like to happen. I do have an ending in mind, but unlike Voltron's writers, I am open to anything!

In the midst of the most chaotic realm in the universe, there was peace. It was quiet, and the quintessence all around provided warmth. It also provided light – so bright, that prolonged exposure had somehow woken the prince from deep sleep.

Lotor stirred. First his fingers twitched, then his legs shifted. He opened his eyes slowly; at first, everything was blurry but upon the familiar silhouette of his beloved, they shot open. He immediately reached for her but winced from the soreness in his muscles. He tried to speak her name, but his throat and lips were far too parched to even let out a sound.

He wondered how long the both of them had been here, floating in the rift. Did he have the ancients to thank for mercy? For sparing his life?

No.

There was no one to thank but everyone to blame. Zarkon, Haggar, his generals, Voltron, and _especially_ not the ancients – for they were the ones that forsaken him from birth. Companionship was a lie. When it touched his lips, the sweet taste of victory turned to a poison inflicted by the very people he toasted with. His last encounter surely was the sip of fatality, but there was only one who had seized the goblet in his stead.

“(Y/N),” Lotor croaked. “ _Please_.”

She was pale. The blood that seeped from her hands and feet dried, small puddles causing her skin and clothes to stick together. Mustering the strength, he pushed himself off the ground. He cradled the back of her neck and moved his ear against her lips. Her breathing was soft, too quiet.

She was dying.

 _Because of him_.

Lotor whimpered, his own breathing turned abnormal. Heightening fear and anxiety gave him the strength to act. He rested her head in his lap and pulled the pendant from her neck.  He chanted a prayer in his head as he poured the Lyran extract into her mouth. It didn’t matter her ailment—the potion would do enough to stabilize _something_.

“Please,” he whispered again. This time, he held her close, caressing her sullen face. Tears slipped past his eyes onto her cheek.

Had he killed his love? His worst fear had been realized: he had turned into the very monster that he’d refuse to be. To make matters worse, he made the conscious decision to use her, _without_ knowing the consequences. At the time, it seemed like an obviously horrid decision. He had been so desperate to prove himself to those that failed him, that he failed the one that mattered most.

Lotor scoffed at himself. He’d failed as a scientist, and emperor, and a lover.

After a few moments, she inhaled deeply. Still unconscious, but alive. He pulled her in closer, pressing a kiss to her forehead before setting her down again. He opened his wrist device, carefully reading her biorhythms.

Steady heartbeat.

…heartbeats.

His own stopped. He blinked twice, staring at his monitor. The sound of synchronized beeping grew louder and louder, until it turned high-pitched. He remained still, stunned. The painful ring in his ear wasn’t enough to break his stupor. In a daze, his eyes looked down, his hand slowly resting atop his love’s stomach.

Every part of her being was cold, except there.

More tears beaded in the corner of his eyes. A small gasp escaped his lips. Soon after, he broke into a sob. How was it possible that in this desolate place, something so precious can exist?

This wasn’t the end – there was more work to be done.

 

* * *

 

“Keith, may I speak with you?”

“Uh, sure.”

The Red Paladin stepped aside, welcoming Allura into his room. He closed the door behind him and offered her to sit, but she seemed completely focused on her hands.

“What’s up?”

“It’s about… (Y/N). Forgive me, I know the subject is still quite sensitive.”

“It’s fine.”

“You two were very close...”

“Yeah,” he trailed off, crossing his arms. “We were.”

“Might I ask something in confidence?”

“Go ahead.”

“Have you ever been, or rather, did you ever act on your feelings for her?”

“ _What_?” Keith’s face twisted in discomfort. “No, never. Allura, what are you talking about?”

Allura sighed, shaking her head. “Do you remember when we were all floating in deep space? What you said about how it was my fault for putting our trust in Lotor? I acknowledge that and after finding the Altean in the robeast I can’t help but feel responsible for deceiving (Y/N)…and her fate.”

“What…are you… _talking about_?” he whispered harshly.

“I’m afraid there’s something I must confess. I’ve been in denial for so long that it’s been driving me mad.”

“Allura, out with it!”

“All right,” she began, clasping her hands together and finally looking meeting his gaze. “When I was building the Sincline ships, there was an encasement much similar to the one that Sam found. I imagine that’s where (Y/N) was meant to be held. When I questioned Lotor about its purpose, he began deceiving me. He redirected my thoughts by manipulating me into thinking that we were romantically compatible—that we were meant to be together.”

“You and Lotor had a thing behind (Y/N)’s back? Allura!”

“I know, I was an absolute fool to believe—”

“So you thought by asking if (Y/N) cheated on Lotor with me, it’d help clear your conscience?!”

“Lotor said that you were trying to—”

“How dare you?!” Keith stepped forward, his hairs standing on end in rage. He clenched his fists and growled, “Weren’t you the one who hated all Galra? From the beginning, (Y/N) accepted us and she _died_ believing in you and Lotor! She thought you were her friend! And now she’s in the quintessence rift _alone_ with the man who only saw her as a battery!”

“Keith, _I’m sorry_ ,” Allura cried. “We were tricked. We all were.”

“If you were honest with (Y/N) from the beginning, she wouldn’t have followed Lotor. She’d still be here with…” Keith sighed deeply and ran his hands through his hair. He paced in an attempt to calm himself, but instead, he yelled and punched the wall. He placed both hands on the wall and stared at his feet.

“Keith! You’re bleeding!”

“I’m fine—I’m _fine_ , let go of me!”

“Keith I….Keith, I’m so sorry…”

“I’m not the one you should be apologizing to.”

Silence passed as the two Paladins shook from the intensity of their emotions. The memory of (Y/N) danced through their mind, fueling the heaviness in their hearts. Despite their opposition, they were honest with their words. After a minute or two, Keith recollected himself.

It was time for his confession, too.

“He was right,” Keith mumbled. “I did have feelings for (Y/N). I’m not sure what kind they were, but I knew better than to act on them. No, actually…I just didn’t know how to. Before I knew it, I was staking a claim on her too.”

“So, that is what Lotor meant.”  

“(Y/N) was happy and that’s all I wanted. She and Shiro mean the world to me. They’re my family. I saved Shiro but…I can’t believe I couldn’t save her too.”

Allura wiped her own tears, then slowly took Keith into her arms. She directed his face into her shoulder, allowing him to hide his tears.

“Shiro’s told me over and over that (Y/N) didn’t die in vain. But I can’t help but feel as if I failed…”

“I know how you feel, losing the ones you love. You’ve always went above and beyond to protect them both. If I could turn back time, I would—”

“I know. Thanks. I’m sorry for shouting at you.”

“Do not apologize. I expected such a reaction. I appreciate your mercy and understanding.”

“Well...I have to, don't I? We're Paladins. Now, we have to focus on ending this war.”

“Yes, it is time we move forward with the coalition,” she said firmly before turning a heel to leave.

“Allura, wait. I forgive you but there is one condition.”

“Uh, of course. Anything, Keith.”

“If there’s a chance that she’s alive, we take it. Just like I did with Shiro.”

She remained silent. Again, she lowered her voice. “And if Lotor is involved?”

“I’m not going to miss a window of opportunity. If he’s there, he’s there but we go at it _peacefully_.”

“After what we’ve done, I’m not sure if he’d go willingly. Are you sure he won’t be hostile?”

“I don’t care. Plus…we didn’t really give him a chance to begin with. And… it’s what (Y/N) would want.”

 

* * *

 

Clad in nothing but his bodysuit, Lotor had worked tirelessly to convert the Sincline’s structure into a habitable living space. Thankfully, there was enough provisions to be farmed and harvested. Rations weren’t an issue. Lotor was resourceful and quick to make decisions. He needed to be while (Y/N) was still alive – while all three of them were alive.

Lotor thought their fates to be doomed, but the possibility of family gave him the inclination to live. He dare not settle to live in a reality where his child never had a chance at life. Lotor would rather suffer lifetimes of torture than to submit to a future chosen by careless Paladins.

But even in solitude, Lotor had enemies. The temptations of quintessence triggered his inner turmoil, which led to uncharacteristic episodes. He couldn’t remember what would happen during these blackouts, but they weren’t alarming enough to isolate himself – not yet. Inevitably, moments of doubt prompted visions. Visions of hope, visions of devastation, visions of the past and future. Having (Y/N) in such close proximity calmed his mind. He repeated her encouraging words:

“You are not Zarkon, you are not Zarkon, _you are not Zarkon_!”

 Would Zarkon break skin to save Honerva and himself? Definitely not.

Lotor’s hands cracked and bled. Without the proper tools to build, he resorted to the nimbleness of his hands. He wasn’t as strong as (Y/N), so dealing with heavy objects was a challenge as well. He didn’t complain. How could he? The pain he made (Y/N) endure was worse – and she was to bear their hybrid child? When would the suffering end?

He needed a break.

Lotor returned to their chambers and sat beside (Y/N). He wore a small smile as he caressed her stomach. By approximation, he dated her to be 4 phoebs along. With what limited knowledge he had on pregnancy in general, he did his best. The scientific aspect of it was not enough to provide adequate comfort. Each experience was different, and (Y/N) wasn’t conscious to share her toils. Not to mention their child would have a…colorful genetic makeup.

Half human, half Galtean.

Apparently, his own birth was considered to be a miracle. If they were to stay in the rift, the circumstances of his child would be the same. Only this time, their child would be welcomed into this world with unconditional love – he’d make sure of it.

No more lamenting, it was time for maintenance.

Lotor squeezed her hand before pressing his lips to her forehead. He reached for a damp rag, wiping along her limbs. After, he applied medicinal cream to her wounds. No Lyran extract – they had to preserve what they had. He finished by pouring kolmon juice into her mouth. This was the hourly regimen. So far, she was healing.  Of course, there were variances in between. Lotor decided to sit her up so better digestion would take place. When he adjusted her position, she groaned.

He almost jerked away. But this was a sign, a very good sign.

His eyes were locked onto hers and within seconds, they slowly opened.

“(Y/N)…?”

 


	27. Life is for Living

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • This is Living (Acoustic) – Kara and Josh  
> • Poison - Luhx  
> • Unconditionally - Katy Perry

The pain in your joints was eerily familiar. But unlike before, you weren’t tied down by restraints. Your consciousness wasn’t met by cold steel. The hands on you had no ill intent either. You were warm…and unafraid.

“Can you hear me?”

When you awoke, you saw the face of the man you loved. His eyes glassed over with tears and his smile seemed so sincere. This man did well to simulate comfort – so well that you’d almost fallen back asleep, almost believed you were safe. This moment was a façade. You didn’t forget who this person was, because this was the same expression that almost lured you to death.

You jolted, scurrying away until the headboard was painfully pressed against your back. Lotor attempted to reach for you again, but you seethed.

“(Y/N), it’s me!”

“I know it’s you.”

“Please, darling. Please don’t be afraid, you’re safe!”

“…safe where?”

He looked too afraid to answer. “Aboard the Sincline.”

“And we’re alive? In the rift?”

“You saved me, (Y/N). You saved _all of us_ ,” he beamed. He reached to caress your stomach, but you gripped his wrist with enough force to make him wince.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“You’re ill, you need to recover. So, darling, if you would please—”

“Don’t call me that. Why didn’t you tell me?”

Lotor withdrew his hand, caressing the minor sprain. His usual scowl returned. “…tell you what?”

“You never made yourself out to be an idiot. You and I know you’re not stupid, you know exactly what I’m talking about. After everything, I think I deserve to have an answer.”

No tolerance, no mercy. It was time for the truth. You intended to scrutinize every one of his movements. Any eye shift and tensed muscle that you once disregarded will now be accountable as a symptom of deceit. If you were to spend an eternity together, you needed to protect yourself and your child. You weren’t going to fall for his lies anymore.

“Is it true? About everything?”

“If you’re speaking of the Altean’s story then perhaps I should enlighten you that I was the one who saved—"

“ _Stop_. Just stop! Stop, stop! Enough! I’ve had enough about that! I’ve had enough!”

“You need to relax, think about the baby.”

You scoffed. “So that our child can be indebted to you as well? You saved them, saved me, saved the freakin’ Alteans? Lyra?"

“You claim that I am no different than Zarkon.”

“No, I don’t.”

“I thought you understood that what I did was for the greater good – for the universe!”

“But world peace doesn’t justify manipulation and mass murder.”

“What I did would have guaranteed life for all others. I stepped up and endured lifetimes in the void for their sake.”

“But at the expense of trust? I trusted you, Lotor!”

“ _Trust_?” he laughed. “My dear, if my goal were gain the trust of everyone in the universe, I’d never succeed. My race alone put me at odds with everyone, even you. But I should’ve known. You humans  cannot possibly understand the complications of an intergalactic war.”

“Then the Galra and humans are no different. It’s because I’m human I can see how wrong this all is!”

Lotor growled, removing himself from your space, turning his back to you. “Humans are flawed. You needn’t brag so boldly about inferiority.”

“‘Inferiority’?” you huffed. “If I’m so inferior, then tell me why I survived the Proto Project. How did Shiro, Matt, and Sam survive? How _Voltron_ is made up of humans?”

“ _Voltron_ has doomed the universe,” he snarled. “There is no telling what damage your beloved Paladins have caused because of their poisoned perception of justice.”

“Then tell me, Lotor…Am I so inferior that you had to lie about wanting to marry me? Having an _inferior_ _child_ , all of what happened between us – was that also a part of your master plan?”

“ _Don’t_ ,” he pressed. There was a fire in his eyes. You once melted from his gaze, but now you were welded from you own anger. You now realized that in the rift, there was nothing left to fear. You were never afraid of Lotor so why start now?

“Using me as the Sincline’s first initial tier of energy was the goal all along? That death trap was made for me. You just never thought that I’d live to confront you about it.”

“That is not true! If I had known you were carrying our child I would not have—”

“But you didn’t. And if I wasn’t, you still would have used me?”

Lotor paused. His resolve was already broken but your words brought him to his knees. He refused to look in your eyes and bore them to the floor. “Yes,” he breathed out.

“Lotor…how could you?”

“It’s true. In the beginning, whence I heard of Haggar’s new project, I knew you were the needle to close the seam of my research with the Alteans. With what I learned from both of you, I was able to produce and construct the quintessence encasement for the Sincline. If my plan to enter the rift was successful, I would be able to restore their vitality.”

“And mine?”

“I had only considered the possibilities of the horrors you would have to endure. After our excursion to Oriande, I had hoped I would be able to unlock secrets that would save your life. As luck would have it, Allura was the one chosen. Through her alchemic knowledge…I was relieved to know I didn’t have to exploit your quintessence.”

“But you didn’t exactly scrap the idea.”

“Falling in love with you was _never_ a part of the plan,” he whispered.

That’s not love.

Is that what you wanted to say? Of course not. Why would he lie? Love is rhetorical. It can be and is relative – for there were many ways it could be expressed and shared. You had done so by remaining at his side. How could you think that he was not capable of it? He, the child who was raised in the void. The variances of affections in his past were no longer relevant. The fact is, you both were to spend the rest of your days in this abyss. Come to terms with truth, accept it, and thrive.

If every moment in this reality was meant to be, then so be it. _This_ is the Lotor given to you – the one you had chosen to love and _forgive_. The entirety of his being captured yours. His endless quirks, hidden habits, silly musings, insatiable wonder, unspoken yearning. For as long and as many lifetimes as it takes, you’d make sure that you’d give him your heart, as promised.

As Lotor held himself, you carried yourself over the bed. The strength in your legs had not returned, so you immediately collapsed to the ground. Lotor gasped, quickly crawling to your side. He cradled you in his arms as you caressed his tear-stained cheek. He shut his eyes and rocked back and forth, almost afraid your existence was too good to be true.

“I’m sorry,” he sobbed. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, (Y/N), my love. I failed. I failed you, I failed all of us.”

“Lotor,” you cooed. You grabbed his hand, guiding it to your womb. Finally, this was the first moment of many between the three of you. He gasped sharply, but you kept him still. Both of your lips curled into a smile, then meeting ever so gently.  

 

* * *

 

The room echoed with clicks. If it wasn’t the keyboard filling the room, it would be sighs and clicked tongues. Every other hour, Keith would enter the room to check on the Yellow and Green Paladins’ progress.

For only a day, they had been working tirelessly in Pidge’s personal space aboard the Atlas. Everything she needed to complete Keith’s orders were here. They had been working hard enough to give Keith an answer he wanted, but so far, they needed more time. Maybe if they had assistance from the rest of the Holt family, they could find _something_. However, this was a task given off-record. A personal request.

“How we doing?” Hunk asked as he re-entered the room with a tray of cookies.

“Still rendering,” Pidge groaned. She lay back in her chair, groaning.

“The launch is in three days. I don’t understand why we can’t work on this then.”

“In space, everyone’s going to be on our asses about Voltron. Here, we’re a _bit_ more inconspicuous.”

“I guess,” Hunk mumbled. He returned to modulating project, but there was a tidbit in his mind that he couldn’t ask with Keith in the room. He looked left, then right, and out the door. He rolled his chair to Pidge and asked, “…do you think they’re still even alive?”

“Honestly…given the witness accounts of what happened and time gap…I’m not sure. The probability of their survival in the rift alone isn’t very high. Pretty sure Allura didn’t account for _that_ to happen when they were building the ships.”

“I understand wanting to save (Y/N) but Lotor? Man, there’s gotta be a good reason why Keith’s okay with bringing him back, especially since he’s the one who ratted on Lotor in the first place.”

“Well…I can kind of understand,” she hummed. “I mean, I did anything I could to save my dad and Matt. Keith did the same thing for Shiro and (Y/N). They were his family.”

“What are you two doing?”

“ACK!” Pidge and Hunk shouted. Their eyes widened, hair stood up, and immediately jumped into defense mode. They loosened their shoulders to see Shiro but blocked the screen panels, remembering their task was _exclusive_ to them and Keith.

“Shi-Shirooooo,” Hunk sang. “What’s up? Back for more kolmon berry treats? Romelle’s still working on them. Some are in the oven.”

Shiro crossed his arms and raised and eyebrow. He stepped forward between the two and studied the screen. He knew what this was; he knew (Y/N) too well to not recognize her vitals. Shaking his head, he pulled away and turned to the two. “Did Keith put you up to this?”

“Er, how did you know?” Pidge asked.

“I’ve got tabs on my crew but even better ones on my friends,” he said. “You don’t have to keep working on this, I’ll talk to him.”

Before Shiro could leave, Pidge grabbed his arm. “Shiro, it’s not just Keith. We all want to save (Y/N).”

“Yeah,” Hunk said. “It’s pretty unfair that we didn’t get to save her in the rift. We didn’t even know she was there until the very last minute.”

A moment passed before Shiro finally responded, sighing and nodding his head. “Do what you have to do.”

 

* * *

 

“Keith!” Shiro called from across the commissary.

The Black Paladin had just finished his dinner, caught off guard when returning his tray. He jogged to Shiro with a grin. “Hey, Shiro. What’s up?”

Shiro crossed his arms. “I just found Pidge and Hunk.”

“Oh…right.”

The two escaped to a place more secure – the Atlas bridge. Even though the launch date for the coalition was impending, Shiro wanted its controls to remain pristine overnight. Keith cooly leaned on the helm and matched Shiro’s sternness.

“You could’ve told me about wanting to find (Y/N). I could’ve set up a whole division dedicated to that. Allura could’ve helped.”

“No. She wouldn’t,” Keith immediately retorted.

“Well, I wanted to. Even if it was my clone, I feel responsible for leaving (Y/N) stranded there.”

“Then, why didn’t you initiate the idea whenever we talked about her?”

“Because she made her decision to stand by him, Keith.”

“That’s not good enough!”

“Trying to save Lotor…complicates things.”

“(Y/N) still has a chance at a future, I know it. You know I’d do anything to save you both. If that includes saving Lotor, then whatever, fine.”

“You don’t know her as well as I do. (Y/N) tied herself to Lotor in every way that she could. You, as a representative of the future of Galra, wouldn’t his presence would make things more difficult?”

“So you’re still saying we give up on (Y/N)?”

“I’m not saying that. I’m saying that the coalition doesn’t have this on their list of priorities. We don’t even know if they’re still alive.”

“Shiro, _no_ ,” Keith cried. “Don’t say that.”

“Losing (Y/N) was painful for me too. But if you knew why she made the decision that she made, you’d understand.” Shiro placed a hand on Keith’s shoulder. He shared the burden of heartbreak. Adam and (Y/N) would always hold a piece of his heart. He had more reason than anyone to act out but as Captain, he couldn’t afford to make emotional decisions when the universe looked to him.

Keith, however, had found most of his best decisions were made by following his heart, his instincts. On that alone, he made the decision to save (Y/N). But fortunately, he had another piece to guide his path of rescue.

“I do know why she stayed with Lotor. She was pregnant.”

Shiro’s eyes widened. “How did…how did you know?”

“I didn’t. I saw it. In a vision of the future when I was in the quantum abyss. I saw a future where she, Lotor, and their kid were alive and happy.”

“Keith, but…are you sure that was real?” Shiro stuttered.

“As sure as I’m seeing you. (Y/N) and Lotor are alive. I don’t know how, but I’ll do anything I can to rescue them.”


	28. Hear My Call [♡]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • Forfeit Tomorrow – Citizen Shade/Lauren Light  
> • Hold Your Breath – Lightcraft  
> • Lay Me Down – Sam Smith
> 
> Happy Holidays, everyone!  
> I present you this chapter, lol. It was some yummy smut hehe.

“Beginning system check. Front and rear stabilizers are a go.”

“Infracells are fully charged. Dynotherms connected.”

“Excellent. Megathrusters are at full power. Prepare for drive.”

You double-checked your seat buckle, then psyching yourself for movement. The damage done unto the Sincline hadn’t resulted in complete immobility. Although the rift was a never-changing environment, Lotor insisted that you kept moving. Traveling would increase the possibility of escape.

But why not use the Sincline’s facets? You’ve suggested the idea before – but Lotor had condemned the ability to jump in and out of the quintessence field at will. Although it was the method that would guarantee freedom, that would require your imprisonment in the encasement again for the initial charge. He’d much rather die than consciously put you and the baby in harm’s way again.

The odds of your survival were unusually favorable. There could’ve been a worse place to be stranded. Unlimited quintessence fueled the Sincline and provided infinite energy. You and Lotor’s combined intellect was a plus as well. But there was no denying that you were understaffed. So, you had to be diligent by doing everything you could to help the Sincline fly again.

“We’re moving really slow…I think,” you said.

“Actually, we are covering much distance. I left a tracker to pinpoint our last location. That way, we’ll know if we’re going in circles.”

“I can’t imagine what it would be like to be stranded here alone.”

“One of the reasons I’ve realized you’re a blessing, love. You risked everything to be here with me. I am eternally grateful for your companionship.”

_But would you have done the same for me?_

You weren’t sure. Perhaps you needed a bit more convincing. Of course, that didn’t mean you hadn’t forgiven him. In fact, what was the right way to forgive someone? How drastic would the offense have to be? Did it take a certain amount of time – you had plenty of it. This was your life now; the Paladins were no longer around to sway your moral judgement.

“What are you thinking?”

“Shiro,” you responded. “I wish he was here.”

_I wish he was here to help me think._

“I wish…I knew he was okay.”

“Keith returned to lead Voltron. I can safely assume he was successful in retrieving him from the witch’s control.”

“So, it was Haggar that did that,” you muttered.

Shiro had already suffered through so much. He hurt you, but you couldn’t blame him for losing control. How could you? You knew that wasn’t him. At last, he was safe and free but there was a consequence to that unfortunate outburst.

You gently placed a hand on your belly, then returned them to the controls of your station.

You’ve come into complete terms with your pregnancy. Now that Lotor knew, the burden felt lighter. Needless to say, this was not the way you expected motherhood to introduce itself. That was fine. As long as you weren’t alone, and child was healthy, that’s all you could ask for. Unfortunately, it was too much to ask for.

Your child was ill.

Faint heartbeat, but alive. If it wasn’t for the current environment, your child surely would not have survived Shiro’s hand _and_ the gruesome quintessence extraction. You and Lotor did your best to oversee, and if possible, improve its vitals. Your shared knowledge was crucial to anticipate potential genetic mutations and complications in anatomy. It was distressing, but there was no use looking to the past. The sound of their heartbeat gave you and Lotor enough hope.

“Are you all right, (Y/N)?”

“I’m all right. Let’s keep moving.”

“Let’s keep _talking_. We need to keep each other grounded from losing our sanity. That is exactly how my mother and father met their demise.”

“Their situation is almost like ours, isn’t it? So bizarre.”

“But we will endure, and we will survive, I swear it. I will not allow our child to be devoid of the love and attention that I so desperately longed for.”

Lotor was a doting father. When he wasn’t busy reconstructing the Sincline, he had his arms around you or his ear pressed to your stomach. You had your reservations, but his excitement melted your heart.

Who cares if this was probably the worst place to live in the universe? You had the best father in the universe to help you.

Of course, he wasn’t perfect. His Galra blood had already triggered an overprotective instinct. The Altean side, well, allowed him to be blatantly shrewd.

You were pregnant, not helpless. So, when he found you helping with the heavy lifting, you always got an earful. It was always the same spiel,

“ _Let me take care of that, you relax_.”

“ _It’s all right for you to eat more, we won’t go hungry_.”

“ _Is the temperature all right? We don’t want the little one to bake in there_.”

“ _Can you imagine how talented they will be? Not to mention beautiful_.”

Over and over again, just with minute differences.

You were thoroughly convinced that Lotor was _born_ to be a father.  The absenteeism of his parents did the opposite of one might expect. Despite his upbringings, he had so much love to give. The excitement of fatherhood had shone in his eyes. It was a sparkle like nothing you’ve ever seen. And _you_ were the one to deliver that joy.

“I am still in awe,” he said. “You are to bring our child into this world…”

“Yes, Lotor. I know,” you laughed softly.

“They will be loved. So loved. How could they not? When their mother’s blood runs through their veins?”

“And as their father, I expect you teach them everything you know.”

“Of course,” he beamed. “That and more. When we escape this wretched place, they will change the universe.”

The view was unchanging. Brilliant light of energy prevented the differentiation of night and day. As the hours passed, you found your thoughts to be as droning as the scenery outside. What were the Paladins doing right now? Did the universe change or did Lotor’s absence leave chaos in their wake?

“Lotor,” you sighed. “What will we do first when we leave this place?”

“We will reclaim my empire. Invoke revenge.”

“Revenge? Against who?”

“Those who’ve wronged me: Allura, the Paladins.”

“Lotor, that includes Shiro and Keith.”

“I’ve told you before: we can only imagine the damage that might’ve occurred. Another power vacuum in the Galra Empire, with no one to delegate between them and the coalition. Death and chaos are imminent. Only we can bring stability. They must face the consequences of their wrongdoing.”

“You’re still planning on being involved? Lotor, we can’t afford to risk our lives anymore. We have to think about the baby.”

“I will never leave them. If and when we escape, we must reclaim our resources so that our child may live comfortably. I want them to be prepared…I want them to be prepared to face Voltron if they are deemed to be a threat simply because they are my child.”

“Look, I agree with you that the Paladins have made a mistake. I’m angry at them for not even giving you a chance…But can’t we go at things peacefully – or slowly at least? Lotor…I don’t want them to be born into war.”

Lotor paused.  “Of course. You should get some rest, (Y/N). We’ve been traveling for quite some time.”

“I will if you join me,” you said whilst getting up.

“In a moment. I should run some calibration tests before setting to auto-pilot.”

“It’s not like we’re going to see anything out of the ordinary anytime soon. I’m sure the Sincline will be fine. It has been for this long.”

“That is exactly why we can no longer be idle. We’re awake now, and we can’t afford failure. We’re close to escape; I can feel—”

“Lotor, please?”

He paused again, this time turning to meet you. You extended your hand, welcoming him to your embrace so that you can relieve him from his own mind. However, he knew that the imbalance of his mind wasn’t what needed to be settled – it was the strain of your relationship.

He had too much to make up for.

 

* * *

 

Your fingers combed through Lotor’s matted locks. Sweat and stress dirtied the silver strands, dulling its shimmer. You pulled the tangles apart and smoothed his hair until it returned to its previous shape. The softness remained, allowing you to section pieces and form a neat braid.

You took your time, allowing Lotor to relax against your touch. You could feel his soft breaths, so you knew it was working. If this small act of intimacy eased his thoughts, what more could you do to bridge the gap? He was still guilty.

As you continued to braid, you leaned forward to press your lips against the outer shell of his ear. You blew into his ear, causing a purr to rumble in his chest. He shivered and turned back to narrow his eyes at you.

“You’re awfully affectionate. You were so keen on rejecting my advances.”

“I wasn’t in the mood earlier. We were piloting.”

“It’s just us two. Why the modesty?”

“We have designated areas for a reason. The helm is for piloting, the bedroom is for cuddles and stuff.”

“‘Cuddles and stuff’?”

“Mhm. Don’t blame me. What the baby wants, the baby gets. And after this, you’re going to deliver on the cuddle of a lifetime.”

“Or I can give you the pleasuring of a lifetime—ow!” Lotor growled, rubbing his tugged scalp. “Don’t look at me like that, (Y/N). It’s the consequence of breeding. You know coitus is a common occurrence between Galran partners when one is carrying.”

You pointed at your belly. “Human!”

“Tell me you haven’t experienced at least one minor heat. I can smell you.”

“Yeah, okay,” you snorted. “I have, but I want to have some restraint. See how far I can resist these primal urges.”

“I think depriving us of pleasure is more likely to drive us insane than the vast of quintessence. But of course, your comfort ultimately comes before mine.”

You finally connected the braids adjacent to his face. This hairstyle fitted his regal features, almost accentuating them. You stared at his face and admired the way his eyelashes draped his eyes. You wondered what characteristics your child would inherit from him – he was so handsome, you were perfectly fine if they looked exactly like him.

You repressed your arousal. As of now, the Galra genes inside you were becoming far more apparent. Your heart raced at the memory of your first time together. You were so bold: you willingly let Lotor breed you without considering the potential consequences. And oddly enough, as a doctor, you didn’t care. You let him claim you over and over again, until one seed finally took root. And until the end of your term, you were helpless to your raging hormones.

“(Y/N)?”

You found yourself panting, cheeks flushed. You pushed your knees together to provide some sort of friction between your legs. You succumbed to your heat.

Lotor was amused but did nothing to tempt you. Instead, he brushed your fringe aside and pressed a chaste kiss to your forehead. “Don’t stress, darling. Take as much time as you need.”

Well, that seemed to do it.

You grabbed at his shoulders, pinning him to the bed. You brought one leg over his waist and grinded against him. He was already hard, and that only instigated you to hump him even faster.

 _Stars_ , that felt good.

Lotor grunted, attempting to be a voice of reason but your strength was too much. “(Y/N)—”

“You win,” you whined. “Okay, you win.”

“Shh, it’s okay, darling,” he cooed. He reached up and gently caressed your cheek. “I was only teasing. You’re right, we must consider the child’s humanity.

“Right,” you scoffed. “Humans still have sex when pregnant. I blame your Galra genes for pushing me. _Now, hurry up_.”

Lotor blinked twice. His expression was so uncharacteristically…docile. Rather than indulging in temptation, he continued to be gentle. He pulled your neck to connect your lips. His energy did not quite match yours, but he was willing.

“Undress, darling.”

You took the reins, shedding yourself and Lotor until you were both bare. You wasted no time to close the space between you, greedily kissing his lips and drowning yourself in his essence. He obliged, but you could sense his hesitation – you aimed to discourage that.

There was a growing feeling in the air, unspoken but liberating. A mutual sense of vulnerability is what made you fall for one another. But you knew an ounce of insecurity had always tugged at his heart. He’d spent an eternity proving his worth, only to be rejected. As much as you’d forgive him, he’d never forgive himself. He was honest; he couldn’t believe that you stayed, that you truly loved him. Now, in this place and time, it was you who needed to affirm his place in your heart.

With your hand, you lined his cock with your sopping entrance. You took your time and eased yourself onto him. Truthfully, you never had issues with the initial insertion, but it had been awhile since your last coupling. You welcomed every inch of him with a moan, resisting the impulsive urge to stuff him inside. By the grip of his claws on your thighs and bleeding lip, he was holding back as well. You panted his name and covered his chest with kisses to distract yourselves while you filled yourself with him.

“My emperor,” you sighed.

“I am not,” he snapped. He was too ashamed to look you in the eye, so you began to ride him slowly and drew a pleasurable groan from him. When his eyes met yours, you pressed your forehead against his.

“Yes, you are. You are and always will be my emperor. ‘I am yours and you are mine’, remember? You bred me – and as your empress, I expect you to continue to do so until the end. I want you to breed me. I want _you_ , and I love _you_.”

Lotor’s eyes sparkled, completely incredulous to your fidelity. “(Y/N)…”

“So, please? May I---”

“Yes, my love,” he breathed out. He captured your lips again with renewed vigor. His confidence returned. “Use me for your pleasure. Satisfy your desire for me.”

Finally, you let go. You wildly raised and lowered your hips, selfishly placating your need to please yourself and him. You both cried out; there was no shame in expressing your satisfaction.

“Don’t stop, darling! Yes, just like that!” Lotor threw his head back, grunting and groaning like an animal. Meanwhile, you felt tears fall onto your cheeks from the incredible feeling of his cock pulsating inside you. Clearly, this type of lovemaking was different from before. Your minds and hearts were filled with nothing but each other--both enchanted by the desire of not only this moment, but the future.

Lotor delighted in the possibility of impregnating you again – having the love of his life constantly carrying his essence in every way possible. You so gladly welcomed the idea. If this consummation lead to love and a wholesome future, how could it be so wrong?

In the heat of the moment, he had realized this, and found an emotional release. He raised himself and flipped you under him. You gasped in delight, wrapping your arms and legs around him to encourage his dominance but he minded the swell of your belly.

“Lotor! Ngh— _yes_!”

“I love you, (Y/N). I love you so much.”

Your eyes widened.

It was always you who made the first confession.

You shut your eyes and pulled him in closer, reaching your climax. Lotor’s thrusts quickened, meeting his peak at the feeling of your walls throbbing around his knot. A softer growl sounded from his chest as his thick cum continued to pour inside of you.

“Oh, _fuck_ ,” you moaned. “God, that never gets old.”

“I am glad to hear it.” Lotor chuckled, pulling you in closer to practically plug himself inside. “Because I fully intend on keeping that promise.”

“Promise?”

“To raise a family with you. I am…ecstatic. I haven’t realized how much I yearned for one of my own. And for you to be the one to willingly provide children I just…am I deserving?”

“Lotor…” You eased him by your side, holding his head to your chest. “I want you to be surrounded with as much love as I can possibly offer. And if that’s what it takes, then I’ll do it.”

At the sound of your own heartbeat, he had fallen asleep. And like a child, his sleeping face reflected innocence and wonder. And in the hands of his abusers, those vital childhood aspects had been robbed from him, severely misguiding his sense of morality. However, you knew his heart had always been in the right place. And for that, he had suffered a seemingly endless lifetime of pain and rejection. No more. You wouldn’t allow for it. Today marks the beginning for his vindication, you decided. And tonight would be the first night Prince Lotor would have a restful, unencumbered sleep.


	29. A Million Dreams

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • I Think We’re Alone Now – Hidden Citizens  
> • Wake Me Up – Kurt Hugo Schneider  
> • A Million Dreams – The Greatest Showman
> 
> I finally made a cover photo for the DoAR playlist on Spotify!

“(Y/N)! Wake up! (Y/N)!”

You groaned, turning from your side of the bed to the other. You rubbed your eyes and carried yourself off the bed with the comforter around your body. When you reached the helm, your body jolted awake.

Lighting was striking in every direction from a single source – a dark orb similar to that of a black hole. And like a storm, clouds moved erratically to create thunderous sound. The quintessence rift no longer shone its brilliance of yellow but had faded to a dark purple to match the tension all around. Lotor struggled to keep the Sincline still against the strong winds.

“Glad to see you up.”

“Yeah, yeah,” you grumbled. You sat in your station and took the controls in hand. “What’s the plan? Should we activate megathrusters to avoid that thing?”

“No, the opposite. We’re going to pilot through it.”

“What? No, you’re not serious. We don’t even know what thing is.”

“We’ve been travelling for weeks with no change in sight. This is the very thing I’ve been hoping to see – a rip in the fabric of reality.”

“So an exit? It’s not something bad? We’re not flying into death?”

“No. You’re right, it is an exit. Someone from our reality is opening the gate, which gives us an opportunity for escape. Think of the quintessence field like layers of a planet –we were stranded in the core, the innermost layer. Piloting through the storm enabled us to reach the mantle. Once we find the next storm, we’ll be free at last.”

“Okay, if it isn’t the giant black hole, the big bolts of lightning aren’t exactly selling it for me.”

A bolt shot through the Sincline, causing you both to painfully jerk. “Would rather we stay here?”

“The last time we faced a rip, it nearly killed us both!”

“I don’t know when we’ll get another chance like this. We need to take it now. Are you with me?”

“We won’t get hurt?”

“If I was certain it’d kill us would I be suggesting such an idea?”

“Yes, okay. Tell me what to do.”

“Megathrusters – set forward!”

You switched on the thrusters to full power and then gripped at the controls and pushed. While you delegated power, Lotor manipulated direction. Almost in a blink of an eye, the Sincline was face to face with the chaotic mass. He drove into its black center, causing all of your surroundings to be engulfed in darkness.

“Keep moving—”

All sound muffled and soon enough, there was complete silence.

“Lotor?” You had tried to feel through the darkness, but you fell to your knees. The helm, seat, and walls were gone. Not even your footsteps could create an echo. “Lotor? Lotor where are you?!” You pushed yourself off the ground and kept running.

This was worse than the rift – much worse. Solitude in pitch black was much more terrifying than your previous state.

It wasn’t long until you had collapsed from exhaustion. You’d forgotten how long and how far you had been running. This darkness was incomparable to the one you had inside of you. This place, this situation, it felt desolate and lonely. “I can’t do this alone without you...”

“What shall we name the boy?”

Your heart jumped. And when you had opened your eyes, you found yourself surrounded in an unfamiliar place. Your eyes scanned the room, falling upon two people. They didn’t react, or even noticed your presence. So, you moved closer to them to make sure.

 “I was thinking a name that has deep Altean history. Lotarious.”

“Lotarious?”

“Zarkon?” you whispered. “Then…this is Honerva.”

“He was one of the ancient Alteans believed to have established much of the foundation of the engineering that built our world.”

“Interesting. I was considering a name from mythology. Kaltor. But he did not build the worlds, he conquered them.”

“Perhaps we can honor both traditions.”

“C-can you hear me? Honerva, Zarkon, I’m—AH!” A strong gust of wind blew everything away. You found yourself in a new place, but a colder room. Only a bed shown, then Zarkon, then Honerva.

“Sire, the birth was difficult but successful. Your son is healthy and in good shape, though we seem to be getting some strange readings coming from him directly. Similar to those that, well…similar to those of the empress and yourself.”

When the medic came into the room, you ran to Honerva’s bedside. But what you had expected to see made you gasp in horror. “ _Haggar_?” When she scorned Lotor’s first cry, your chest tightened. “I’m in…I’m in the past!”

“Your son, sire.”

“Take him away.”

“But—”

“I said take him away!”

“How could they?” you hissed. But of course, this was the Zarkon that lost himself to quintessence. _This_ was the Zarkon you knew.

“And what of her?”

“I’m sorry, sire. We have her under constant watch, but she remains in this state. She only seems to become aware when we administer her quintessence. I’m hopeful her condition will improve with time, but…Sire, we’re going to have to face the fact that our quintessence supplies are finite. The empire cannot continue to run on what we have. And you and the empress…without, you’ll—”

“Give me the room.”

Honerva _was_ Haggar. Lotor’s parents had been responsible for the universe’s state for millennia. These visions were horrifying, but enlightening. Now, you know the history behind the fate of reality. What goal they had conducted for the Galra did not have any true conviction.

“Do you know who I am? Zarkon asked, approaching his former wife.

“You are…emperor.”   

“And you?”

“Ha—Haggar?”

“Do you know of quintessence?”

“ _Quintessence_.”

“Can you find me quintessence?”

“Yes, my emperor.”

You opened your mouth to speak, but you felt the room shake. The vibrations increased, simulating movement like an earthquake. You could no longer stand, falling to your bottom then curling into a ball and covering your neck to anticipate falling debris. But instead, everything suddenly froze. The walls crumbled to reveal a new room, one that you were familiar with: the throne room.

You were seated between two parties – Zarkon and Haggar to your front, and a woman and a child to your back.

“Dayak, update me on the prince’s progress,” said Zarkon.

“Yes, sire. Prince Lotor’s completed the Agotian Trials as you requested. He was successful, even though they were advanced for his age.”

You blinked twice, staring behind you. “ _That’s_ Dayak? So then that’s…Lotor.”

“What else?”

“His physical stature is below expectation for the blood lineage of the Galra royalty, but his tactical scores are the highest we’ve ever measured.”

“All I do, I do in the name of Galra,” Lotor said. “Father, there’s a question I’ve been wanting to ask you.”

Your heart melted. He was small, so much smaller than you imagined he would be. But the expression he wore was no different to the one you knew. You crawled to him and reached to caress his chubby cheek. But when you placed it, your hand went through him, like a ghost.

“Greatest apologies, sire. This one should not be speaking out of place,” said Dayak.

“Proceed,” said Zarkon.

“I would like to know about my mother. Please, father, what happened to her?”

“I will tell you this and no more. She was my only weakness. But now she is gone.”

“What was her name? What was she like?”

“Enough.”

“Please, father. I must know who I come from.”

“I said, enough! If you do not remove his impurities, then I will find a Dayak that can.”

 “He will be punished accordingly. We will sear him down to his inner fire so that he may burn the universe. _Vrepit sa._ ”

Dayak turned a heel to exit the throne room, Lotor obediently following her heel. You pined to comfort him, running behind them so that you could do anything to reach him.

“Lotor! Lotor, wait!” Suddenly, you felt your body being pulled backward. The grip on your shoulders felt vicelike, and you used your strength to push the fingers off your body. You kicked and scream, but the hands held your face still instead. You found yourself in the hands of Lotor – still young, but as an older child. You scooted backward, seeing that he had been holding Kova in your place.

“What is his name?” Lotor asked.

“He has no name,” said Haggar.

“Then I shall name it. Your name will be—”

“Kova. His name is Kova.”

“This creature pleases me. It will be mine.”

“My lord—”

“You may be the high priestess, but I am your prince, and you will do as I say. Isn’t that right, Kova?”

You laughed. He hadn’t changed at all. A little bratty, you admit, but that’s what you’d expect from a prince. You’d wished that the visions hadn’t been so unpredictable – any movement seemed to invoke the next scene. So, you stood still and watched Lotor’s back as he left the room. And when you did, he stopped.

Apprehensively, he turned to face you. You stuttered, having difficulty to find the words to answer him, but he found them for you.

“It’s you,” he said, running to your front and grabbing your hand.

“You can see me? H-how – wait, you _know_ who I am?”

“Of course I do. You’re the Galran goddess, the indomitable Lady Veyngar. You’ve come to guide me!”

“I—oh.” You shook your head, kneeling to match the boy’s height. With both hands, you pressed his small one to your heart and smiled. He was taken by your warmth, almost…afraid. Affection was always unbeknownst to him and that had completely broken you. You engulfed him into your arms.

Was this truly a vision, or a moment in time? You couldn’t care less of what your answer would cause. What mattered most is that this moment was happening – a chance to provide a beacon of light in this man’s childhood.

“Lotor, you are loved. _So loved_. I want you to know that. Your dream at peace, at a better universe will become reality, I promise. So please, _never_ stop dreaming.” Gravity began to weigh down on you, pulling you into a massive black hole. “No, not now!” you gasped.

“No wait!” Lotor shrieked, pulling your arm. He cried while he struggled, but the pull was too much. When your hand slipped to his fingers, he became frantic. “Please don’t go! _Don’t leave me_!”

“I’ll _never_ leave you! We’ll meet again, I promise! My name is—”

“(Y/N)!”

Your eyes shot open. You sat up, bumping your head against something hard. You cringed for a moment, but the pain and ambiance were much different from before. You had returned to your station aboard the Sincline. You looked out the window, hoping to see the stars, but there was nothing except quintessence. This time, the realm shined blue. You looked to your left, noticing that it was Lotor’s forehead that you bumped against.

“Lotor, you’re…you’re here.”

“Yes. We did it – we’ve escape to the second layer.”

“But that – what was _that_? D-did you—”

“You are referring to the dreams. Yes, I did see them. I’ll explain everything in a second, but I need you to relax.”

You nodded, looking down. The movement of your arms and legs had been restricted by an emergence of roots. Parts of your clothing had melted into the seat, which made your escape even more difficult. Using your strength, you ripped and unbound yourself from the roots. Your stomach was also significantly larger than you remembered.

Lotor began typing away at the controls on to his wrist device. Of course, you had no idea what he realized but by the way he worked, you couldn’t tell if it was good or bad. Actually, you’d never seen him this anxious.

“W-what happened? How long have we been asleep?”

He looked to his wrist device again, this time pulling up the bioscanners. His brows furrowed, then shaking his head in disbelief. “We…we’ve been asleep for three months.”

“ _Three months_?! But that only felt like a couple of hours!”

“I see...My mother had theorized this phenomenon, but I can confidently say our experience confirms it to be real.”

“Which is?”

“They’re called Dreams of Another Reality. If one travels through the rift, they are then able to witness visions of the past, present and future. But unlike the quantum abyss, there is the potential to see moments in time of any reality. My mother’s exposure to the rift had enabled her to witness visions of the future. In my case, I had seen your life on Earth.”

“So that was real. In mine I…I saw your childhood. I saw everything. What they did to you was… _horrible_.”

He sighed, giving you a reassuring smile. “I survived it.”

“Not only that, I was able to talk to you. Did you talk to me?”

For a moment, he was surprised, as if what you said was a shocking discovery.  But then he coolly crossed his arms in thought and pressed a finger to his lips. “Fascinating. It seems that our close proximity has allowed for us to see into each other’s lives.”

“Well, this isn’t time for research. We need to make sure the baby’s okay after going through three months without a proper physical examination.”

“Right, of course. According to our bioscanners, everything seems to be fine. Are you feeling anything strange?”

“Not that I know of. Lotor, I’m worried. Are you sure going through that was safe?”

“(Y/N), I understand that all of this is scary, but I need you to trust me. That alone may seem hard as well, but we need to find another eye of the storm. We need to undergo the Dreams of Another Reality once more.  Once we do, we’ll be free. From there, we can find the adequate resources to provide for our child.”

“Lotor, I do trust you, but finding the first storm took _weeks_. Who knows when the next one would be? If we go through it, we might not be awake in time for me to have a safe delivery…This isn’t scary, it’s terrifying. I need you with me.”

Lotor swallowed thickly. He squeezed your hand and rubbed it with his thumb. Pressing a long kiss to your forehead, he then pulled you into a tight embrace. “Of course, love. How could I abandon you when you’ve promised not to leave me lifetimes ago?”

Your head shot up in surprise. “Wait, Lotor, you—”

The Sincline shook again. The ominous cloud from which you entered had reappeared behind you, and another to your front. Supposedly, that would be the one to lead you home.

“That’s oddly convenient,” you grumbled.

“Someone must be trying to enter the rift.”

“Allura?”

“No. This is different. Her alchemic abilities wouldn’t produce a portal so sinister.”

“Then…Haggar? Is that possible?”

Lotor eyes widened in realization. Without warning, he picked you up, and had you seated in his lap at the main helm.  

“Lotor, what’s wrong?” you stammered.

“It’s not improbable that the witch may be seeking us out. Regardless, we must not risk the opportunity at freedom. We must fly through it.”

“But the baby—”

“(Y/N), I’d _never_ so carelessly put my family in jeopardy. The witch will not touch you, much less this gate.  If we experience Dreams of Another Reality, we’ll do it together. But we need to act fast!”

You gave him a small nod and embraced his torso. You held him tighter when you felt him work at the controls, singlehandedly flying into the storm. If this were to be your last moment, you’d leave this world looking into his eyes.

Diligently, he continued to pilot, but felt the intensity of your stare.

“(Y/N), I love you. More than anything.”

“I love you too.”

And with that, you both had entered and had been engulfed by the darkness for one last time.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was probably my longest, and took the most detail to write. I had to rewatch all seasons/reread this series to make sure I maintained consistency. There's a lot of planning/intention that went into this series in general so if you'd like to discuss, I'd love to do so! Again, thank you to everyone for reading and leaving such nice comments, it means so much!


	30. Carry Your Will

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • Til Death Do Us Part – Kait Weston  
> • Man or a Monster – Sam Tinnesz/Zayde Wolf  
> • Better Than I - David Campbell/John Bucchino 
> 
> Happy New Year, everyone! We're nearing toward the end of DoAR - I've finalized the plot and it's going to be e p i c.

Lotor kept walking, proud and unafraid. He’s treaded through worse. He’s _lived_ through worse. The darkness could not possibly harbor his fears. Survive the visions, ignore temptation, return home – return to _her_.

In the distance, a small light shone. His mien was unchanged. Remain calm, he told himself. The events will unfold on their own; he would only need to meet it halfway. The light grew with each passing step until he had escaped the darkness.

When he stepped into the light, he found himself in an empty, white room. The spaces began to fill with the sudden appearance of furniture. From the simplicity and practicality of décor, he could deduce that this was a generic room – a military bunker, or medical keep.

Lotor recognized this place. He’s seen it before, in his previous Dreams of Another Reality.

“These test scores are atrocious.”

He remembered this scene. Two figures appeared: Admiral Sanda and a young (Y/N). Why was he experiencing this memory for the second time?

“I hope you have an explanation for this, (Y/N). These recent failures are _not_ becoming of a Sanda.”  

“I am a Sanda,” (Y/N) cried.

“Are you now? Then would you care to explain why you scored only an 87% the simulation practicals?”

“I…I did my best…”

“You mother and father didn’t send you here to try. They sent you to me to succeed. If you fail one more time, I will not hesitate to send you to the custodial department.”

“I’m sorry, Aunt Ellen. It won’t happen again…”

“It had better not. And what have I said about decorating?” Ellen snapped.

Lotor looked back to the hanging pictures on the walls – sketches of animals, landscapes, planets and constellations. “She’s always had such an inquisitive personality.”

“A soldier must always keep their workspace neat and tidy. Clutter distracts the mind. You need to be in tip-top condition for tomorrow’s trials. Now, clean it up. You have your history lessons with Commander Sablan in ten minutes.”

“Yes, Aunt Ellen.”

Lotor sighed. (Y/N)’s insecurities were no longer a wonder. They stemmed from childhood, much like his. His heart panged. He didn’t mean to undermine your life experiences in the first few months of knowing each other – especially when he believed in your potential.

Like his guilt, another scene surrounded him. Green fields replaced the white floors. The sun’s rays expanded, revealing clear skies. Trees and flower patches spurted from the ground. The sound of children’s laugher filled the air. A cold gust of wind passed; the change in environment was refreshing.

(Y/N) sat at Lotor’s feet. Her small hands brushed against the flowers’ petals. When an insect landed on her hand, she made no face or sound of disgust. Instead she smiled and guided it to the next flower. She pulled out a notepad, sketching its anatomy and wing pattern until a kick of sand went her way.

“It’s the the Sanda kid.”

“Spoiled brat.”

“You know she’s actually an alien? That’s why the Admiral keeps her locked up in the Garrison.”

“Hey Sanda! How come you don’t die when you breath Earth air?!”

Lotor snarled. Hearing these insults for the second time around made them no less hurtful. He could care less about the age of these Earthlings. He stormed over to raise a hand against them, but another beat him to it.

“Of course, how could I forget?” Lotor laughed. “So much fire in a small body.”

The fist belonged to (Y/N). She did not hesitate to punch him again. It was in the act of defense, Lotor concluded. However, she was joined by another. In a panic, the bullies ran the opposite direction. Remembering who it was, he chuckled and crossed his arms. “My, my. If it isn’t the brave Black Paladin.”

“Don’t you no-lives have anything better to do?! (Y/N), are you okay?!”

(Y/N). “Shiro—”

“Ugh, I told you to stop calling me that!” The young boy brushed the dirt off her uniform and patted down her hair.

 “Sorry, Takashi.”

“I told you to wait for me! That’s the kinda crap that happens when you go off by yourself.”

“You were taking too long! I wasn’t gonna miss the primroses’ bloom cuz you were staring at Adam.”

“HEY!” Shiro blushed and stomped his foot. “Look, I promised your uncle that I’d take care of you. I can’t do that if you’re running away and starting fights. Just ignore them, (Y/N). What would’ve happened if you had another attack?”

 “I’m fine, Shi—Takashi. I can take care of myself. I’m a strong girl!”

“A strong girl indeed,” Lotor repeated.

He remembered the details (Y/N) shared about herself. It wasn’t difficult to infer the context behind these visions. (Y/N) was a sheltered, sick child borne into a family of authority. He appreciated the opportunity to witness her upbringing, but these characteristics never defined her. So why were these visions chosen for him and more importantly, why were they being shown to him a second time?

As he recalled, these visions were chronological. The next would be her schooling days, maturity milestones, heartbreak, all the events that would lead her to him. If they unfolded like before, this would make the timeskip easier. So, he made the effort to study ever detail.

He knelt beside (Y/N) and watched her facial expressions. The young (Y/N) had stolen his heart. So bright and pure, someday, that smile would be just for him. He reached out, but her figure had ebbed away, like smoke. The gust of wind pushed everything away, returning him to darkness. But an item remained: in the distance, a bed with (Y/N) in it.

Lotor adored her sleeping face. For a moment, he admired the peace she emitted until she began to cough. One after another – her coughing was relentless. Blood escaped her panting mouth. She was pale, and her face twisted in pain as her hand clutched to her chest.

“W-what is this?” he gasped. He covered his mouth and stepped back in horror as the medics poured into the room, surrounding the little girl to provide much aid as possible. “I don’t—I don’t remember this.”

“Of course you don’t.”

Lotor’s head whipped to look behind him. The icy voice that greeted him belonged to that of Ellen Sanda. “You can see me?”

“As clear as day, Lotor.”

“You know of me?”

“Of your people. But you, I haven’t had the displeasure.”

Lotor turned indignant. “You’re an illusion. I have no intention to gift my attention to my lover’s abuser.”

“Speak for yourself,” Sanda huffed. “Weren’t you the one who kept my little girl like pet? You clipped her wings and locked her in a cage. Then you forced her to sing for you like some sort of songbird.”

“She’s not your little girl. She belongs to no one.”

“And yet you’ve made the executive decision to claim and use her for your benefit.”

“Those days are behind us,” he growled. “I respect (Y/N) as an equal. I see her heart and I treasure her above all things.”

“Above quintessence?”

“ _Especially_ above quintessence. I see now that its bounty is nothing more than a poison.”

“A poison,” Sanda scoffed. With the snap of her fingers, Lotor found himself in the Sincline once again. He thought to have returned, but he was not seated at the helm. He searched for (Y/N), but his heart stopped to find the encasement – with _her_ inside. 

“Lotor! Lotor, _please_!”

Her screams pierced his ears. Every recharge, every beam was a stab to his heart. He helplessly beat his fists against the screen, only to fail and witness the gruesome torture she underwent because of _him_. Through the glass, (Y/N) writhed and sobbed. To make the scene all the more heartbreaking, she recanted his name to pray for his change of heart all while she clutched her womb. He turned back to Sanda with a pitiful sob, “Why are you showing me this?”

“(Y/N) is simply one of the few victims of your plan to harvest quintessence. Her, the Alteans, and the Paladins were all tools of a ploy to lead you here, to face the consequences of your actions.”

 Lotor watched as (Y/N) broke through the glass. He felt useless; for each time she fell, she had only phased through his arms. He followed her painstaking tread to helm and witnessed the events that had sealed their fate.

“Lotor, _please_ …I’m right here. Hailing…Paladins of Voltron…”

“(Y/N)?! (Y/N), _what are you doing there_?!”

“I can’t leave him. _I’ll never leave him_.”

(Y/N) collapsed again, but when her body hit the ground, the entire helm had turned into a grave. Lotor jaw dropped at the sight. He fell to his knees, releasing a bloodcurdling cry. He angrily hit the ground repeatedly, blooding his knuckles. Before his anger shattered the bones in his hands, he stopped. A moment of realization. He swallowed thickly and growled. “This isn’t real. You’re not real. (Y/N) is safe and waiting for me on the other side.”

Sanda approached him, placing a hand on his trembling shoulder. With another snap of her fingers, flurry of memories projected over their heads. They were his own: from the moment of his birth until his entrapment in the rift.

“Throk, you wish to challenge me? Then come down and claim your crown.

Attention, Paladins of Voltron and rebel fighters. I know we’ve had our differences in the past…but I think it is time we had a discussion.

You speak to me of weakness? Tell me, what does it feel like to grow weaker and weaker? … Is that why you strive for Voltron so desperately?

I am lighting that flame, and my first act as emperor will be to reunite you with my late father!

We accomplished something amazing today, and it would’ve never happened had it not been for you.”

Lotor’s expression darkened. His eyes frantically searched the memories, but one major detail had troubled him even deeper.

“ _Where is she_?” he hissed.

“I’m giving you a chance to relive in a reality without ever meeting (Y/N).”

“And pray tell me why I would ever want that?”

“No suffering. (Y/N) would not suffer at the hands of the Galra. I believe at this point, you now know what that includes. If you truly love her, wouldn’t you agree that it’s the right choice?”

“But everything would remain the same.”

“Yes. But you’ll live without that burden on your conscience.”

Lotor lifted his chin to gaze at the new reality one more time. A life without (Y/N)? One where she’d be safe from war? It seemed like such an obvious decision. He closed his eyes, contemplating all the potential outcomes. He tried to picture himself standing alone, but the thought unbearable. Her smile was impossible to forget.

“No.”

Sanda’s scowled. “You’d refuse?”

Lotor rose, finding his confidence again. “Are you mad? Of course I’d refuse. I’ve learned my lesson: I am not alone. I can and will no longer make selfish decisions on (Y/N)’s behalf. (Y/N) is _not_ a burden. She is my salvation.”

“It is the ideal reality!”

“A child’s death ideal to you? Kill her before she’s had a chance at life? The alternate was so disgustingly obvious. I know (Y/N). Her heart is pure but she would never do something so radical. Keep your flawed reality. I don’t care if this may be the only one where the stars align for us. I was born for her and she was made for me. Nothing will keep us apart.”

Lotor turned, and the moment he placed his foot, the light of quintessence emerged from his step toward the horizon. Lyran roses surrounded them both and the fireflies danced through the air. He awed at its beauty then turned to Sanda questioningly.

“That was a test.”

“And you passed, Prince Lotor. By my standards, you are suitable for my little girl. Not perfect, but suitable.”

“A trial for a guardian’s approval?” he said, clicking his tongue. “Very theatrical. But why is it that you speak of her as a mother would?”

Sanda smiled to the floor, watching the roses sway in the breeze. Lotor gasped inwardly, then turning to completely face her.

“You’re—”

“Our family has a reputation of protecting others. (Y/N)’s condition made it almost impossible for her to be a part of our military. So, her parents sent her to me to change that. But no one can undo heart disease. I was hard on her because I knew she _still_ had potential to do good. Then, she made the decion on her own to become a doctor. She was always so good.”

“Your influence did affect her. In all my life, I’ve never met someone as selfless and kind as (Y/N). You know that she never needed quintessence to be strong.”

“And I am so proud of her. I just wish I could tell her.” Sanda chuckled, shaking her head. “I’m not one to judge someone based on their past. I’ve made many mistakes in my life. Even towards the end of it, I’ve misunderstood the young people and their potential. If I had only trusted the Paladins, I would have never put Earth in danger.”

“You’re not the only one who had misplaced their trust in the Paladins. But what danger occurred?”

“Sendak. He meant to destroy the earth.”

“Did he succeed?”

“Thankfully, no. I passed on with the knowledge that Voltron had saved them all.”

“So there is no further knowledge on what they will do next?”

“Not exactly, no. I’m sorry.”

“Right.” 

“I can only hope that this conversation and my approval is enough to make up for how sorry I am.”

“You may rest easy knowing that I will deliver that message to her. You have my word, Ellen Sanda.”

“Thank you.”

Sanda extended her hand, revealing the portal that would allow him to exit. Lotor smiled, knowing that (Y/N) would be on the other side. He sent Sanda a curt nod and went on his way.

“Thank you, Prince Lotor.”

 

* * *

 

The roots had grown through every open space, nook, and cranny. At this rate, the Sincline would fall apart. When you came to, your worst anxiety had been imagined: Lotor and you were _covered_ in roots. His armor was practically welded into the seat. There were far too many roots to free yourselves from, so you focused on waking him.

“Lotor. Lotor, wake up!”

He groaned and turned his head, but the movement caused him to sink further into the seat. Although his marks glowed, he appeared to be having a nightmare. You needed to act fast. You pushed through the roots and forcibly pulled him to you, shaking him. At least this way, he wouldn’t sink. You couldn’t see past the Sincline’s eyes. It was much too bright, and the chaos outside wouldn’t allow you to decipher your location. The truth of the matter was, you had no idea where you were.

You shook him again, yelling into his ear. “Lotor, I need you to wake up. Don’t follow the dreams, follow my voice!” The Sincline shook again, but now in a way that was less erratic, as if it moved with intent. You looked to the controls. Auto-pilot, but how did the Sincline summon its weapons, thrusters and tail on its own? Then, you recognized this pattern of attack. It was fighting something, _someone_ on the outside.

“Is it protecting us?” you whispered.

“Still.”

“…Honerva?”

 

* * *

 

 The Paladins were shaken, completely spellbound to Honerva’s limitless power. The heading to Oriande seemed to be a straight forward task but with all that had occurred, victory seemed unattainable. Now, with the reemergence of the Sincline, their hopes diminished even further.

Keith struggled to breathe. Lotor’s return also meant (Y/N)’s return. “This was Honerva’s plan all along.”

“No,” Allura gasped. “He’s back. I can’t…No!”

“Paladins, attack!” Keith ordered.

Damn his instincts – damn it all! Of course he needed to act as the head of Voltron. The Sincline acted on Honerva’s disposal. _She_ was right there, inside, right in front of him. His heart was set to act on the first opportunity, but there was too much at stake. His heart wavered, giving the Sincline multiple openings to attack, each more detrimental than the last. The Lions dispersed, giving time for Honerva to escape. Keith should’ve known – as Lotor’s mother, of course she’d do anything to bring him back. And this moment of defeat proved that all its time spent in the quintessence field had prepared the Sincline for revenge.

“Paladins are you there?” Allura called. “Paladins, respond. We must get out of here or we will all perish.”

“I’m moving again.” Keith breathed in deeply, shutting his eyes. “I’ll save you, (Y/N). I promise.”

 

* * *

 

Shiro stood at the head of the conference table, looking to the visuals on the board. "Remind me of the assets that the Sincline holds." 

“Twin blades, lasers, weaponized tail, and quintessence field traversal. The Sincline is still just a ship. Voltron’s more capable than of taking it down with the Atlas. It’s honestly no different than a robeast,” Pidge stated.

“The only difference is that it’s got Honerva this time,” said Hunk. “With her and Lotor working together, they’ll be more unpredictable than before.”

Lance crossed his arms, raising an eyebrow. “But do you seriously think Lotor will agree with working with her? Didn’t he like, hate her?”

“The only true difference is that doesn’t use Honerva’s powers,” Keith interrupted, causing everyone to anxiously turn their heads. “Don’t forget that Lotor’s return also means (Y/N)’s back.”

“Keith, no one has forgotten that,” Shiro reassured.

"We also mustn't forget that Lotor must extract quintessence from (Y/N) to initiate the Sincline's powers." Allura lowered her gaze, guiltily staring into her lap. “I’m sorry, Keith. I know how frustrated you are, considering that we promised to save her at the first opportunity. But I know this will not be the last time we see them.”

Keith glowered. “But if Honerva plans to control Lotor, like Tavo said, then she won’t hesitate to use her too. The next time we _do_ see them, she’ll probably be under Honerva’s control.”

Lance pressed his lips together, reaching out to place his hand on Keith’s shoulder. “C’mon, man. Have a little bit more faith in (Y/N). She’s dealt and dined with the Galra on her own. I think you’re the one who’s forgotten how strong she is.”

“Lance is right,” said Shiro. “(Y/N)’s return is a good sign – it means she could probably help us from the inside.”

Allura nodded. “Then we must continue doing our part as well.”

“Uh, what about Lotor?” Hunk curled into himself, pressing the tips of forefingers together.

Allura looked to Keith, then nodded with a small smile. Faith would be recompense for her wrongdoing.

“If Lotor truly loves (Y/N), then I have no reason to doubt that she will bring him into the light."


	31. Fire on Fire

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • Fire on Fire – Sam Smith  
> • Breathe – Fleurie  
> • Ashes – Celine Dion 
> 
> Lots of shifting POVs in this chapter.

“It’s good to see you again, Princess.”

“How? How did you get in here?!”

“You know, the ancients believed that all of life began with a single juniberry flower.”

Allura immediately regained her consciousness at the sight of Lotor, readying her bayard and magical offense. She attacked, but the whip went right through his form. He chuckled, still standing confidently.

“I thought you’d be happy to see me.”

“What are you doing here? Where is (Y/N)? I demand to know!”

“You and I desire the same thing. We both seek to destroy Haggar.”

“Haggar? Haggar is no longer. She’s Honerva now.”

“True. Though I could rename this a highlands poppy, you and I would still know what it truly is. The witch may change her name, but she will always be a witch.”  

“Be that as it may, she’s too powerful. There’s nothing I can do to counter her abilities.”

“You are mistaken. Everything you need is here.”

“How?”

Lotor waved a hand, summoning a visual of the rift’s dark forces. “This entity holds the power you seek. It is an ancient form of energy that predates time itself. It hails from the quintessence field. Entities like this gave Haggar the ability to conquer worlds and control the universe for 10,000 years. She recognizes the strength it provides her, and she uses it. If you can become one with the entity, then the powers you gain can defeat the witch.”

Lotor’s voice put Allura in a stupor, edging her closer to free the entity. “It’s been here the entire time.”

“Everything you need, the ability you’ve been seeking, within your grasp. Go ahead, Allura, free it.”

The Princess reached forward, but there was more than one voice tempting her. “I can’t…I won’t.” Her father, mother, Coran, and all the Paladins flashed in her mind.

“ _Take it_ ,” Lotor urged.

“No. This is not real!”

Lotor screamed. A sharp pain ran through him, causing him to clutch his head to fall to his knees. His resolve faded as quickly as the room around him. He threw himself repeatedly against the walls, but nothing could relieve the vicious grip on his mentality. He groaned in agony and looked at his reflection against the metal. With his eyes emitting a yellow glow, he knew: he was completely at Honerva’s mercy.

Honerva stepped forward, replacing him on the platform to project herself instead. “It won’t do any harm. The entity will help you. It will save all of us. Only you can save us all.” With her abilities, she was able to mimic the likeness of him, the Blue Paladin, and Queen Melenor – anyone she could to convince Allura to free the entity aboard the Atlas. “Release the entity. Come home to Altea. Join us.”

Lotor growled at her feet. He wished to maim her, restrict her movements and tear her apart limb from limb in recompense for centuries of cruelty. However, he was helpless against her powers and whim. When she stepped away, he moved to strangle her, but with the swipe of her hand, he found himself physically imprisoned again.

“I did as you asked, now release us!” he roared.

“You told the Princess that the entity will give her the means to defeat me.”

“Why do you care how I do it? You just needed me to convince her to free it.”

“But you failed. I had to step in.”

“You would know about failure. She took it, like you wanted, so what does it matter?” Lotor banged his fist against the glass and snarled. “Now tell me where (Y/N) is, witch! If I am to learn you’ve harmed her, I swear when I am free, I will have you begging for death as mercy!”

“Do you forget who it is that you are threatening? I am the one who had saved you both from the rift. The fact of the matter is, you and I are kin. Be careful to who it is you speak, my son. The Proto Project is at my mercy.”

“ _She is not the Proto Project_!” Lotor shook with fury. “And I am not your son. You think I care about your falsified concern? I see through your deception – I know what your true intentions are. We are simply the baggage that you must tolerate until you are able to follow through with your plans.”

“If I am so transparent, can you tell me what I hope to accomplish?”

“A new reality. A new Altea. But that is something beyond even your reach.”

“We have Oriande. The Alteans thrive under my rule. And now, I have the Sincline and its pilots. I have everything I need and more to find the perfect reality. What makes you so sure that I am incapable?”

“It’s not a matter of competency. It’s because I’ve seen it – the Dreams of Another Reality. There is no possible outcome that exists in your favor.”

Honerva faltered then whisked to him, matching his anger. “Your resistance is for naught. I will find our happiness.”  

“Your conviction is fabricated. You will fail.”

A sinister smile slowly formed on her face. It was a sight that made him weaker than her abilities. “You’re forgetting, my son. There is one more asset I have – my grandchild.”

“No,” Lotor gasped. As she began to walk away, his fists pounded against the barrier. “No, no, no! Damn you! No!”

 

* * *

 

 _Wake_. *

 _I said,_ wake!

Your eyes burst open. Your chest heaved from the sharp, immense pain that escaped your lower half. Your raised your hand, mouth agape to gasp at the mass of blood that dripped from your hand. You cringed and writhed. The table below your cracked from your pounding fist, but nothing gave you relief.

The single light above you slowly began to recede by an incoming figure. A cloth pressed to your forehead, absorbing beads of sweat. Into full view, you thrashed about.

“H-Honerva,” you grunted. Waves of pain moved throughout your body. You screamed and brought your fist down again, completely destroying the table. “Where’s Lotor?”

“Be still. Expend your energy for the child.”

“Where’s Lotor?!” you shouted again, throwing your fist in her direction. You used full force but, somehow, she managed to stop your attack by simply holding your forearm.

“Beckon the quintessence – return it to him.”

“‘Him’?” you gasped. Another wave hit you. The pain was unbearable – comparable to impacts of the Sincline’s encasement. So, you did as told. Your core burned; the center of your being transported quintessence to every cell to give you the energy to relieve yourself. Your muscles constricted then released, allowing all tension to escape you.

A cry.

Tears beaded in the corner of your eyes as Honerva placed the small bundle beside your head. You hesitantly reached forward. The moment your fingertips touched the soft, purple cheek you engulfed your baby into your arms.

He was absolutely perfect.

“ _Taryn_ ,” you cried.

Your son was the spitting image of Lotor. You could see the tufts of white hair sprouting from his little head and through his eye slits were blue irises. And upon initial contact, his cries immediately stopped. Your heartbeat had lulled him into a deep slumber.

As Honerva stepped forward, you protectively held Taryn to your chest.

“It appears that our fates have been intertwined, _Proto Project_.”

So, it was her. She was the one who had summoned the Sincline from the rift. The trials and tribulations you have faced in the Dreams of Another Reality lead to this moment. Finally, you’ve come face to face with the woman who had abandoned Lotor, destroyed planets, tortured and killed. She was terrifying. Her motives to help in the delivery of her grandson were unclear but there was no doubt that her heart held nothing but rage and malice.

“Eons of magic could not foresee this dubious reunion.” Her icy tone sent a chill down your spine. “No words, (Y/N) Sanda?”  

She knew your name. You weren’t sure if that was comforting or frightening.

“Honerva, where am I? Where’s Lotor?”

“Oriande. I had safely retrieved you both from the quintessence field.”

“So, it was you.” You swallowed thickly. You knew what Oriande had meant to the Alteans, to Lotor. Something was amiss if someone like her was inhabiting this sacred ground. Did the Paladins know she was here? Lotor had warned you countless times, Honerva always had an ulterior motive. She wouldn’t hesitate to use you – _there was a reason she kept you alive_. You needed to be wary, do not provoke her unnecessarily. If the odds were favorable, you would’ve lashed out, but it wasn’t your life at stake anymore – you needed to protect Taryn.

“My intention was to save my son, not you. As I’ve said before, your presence was unexpected. Much less claimed and with child.”

Taryn mewed and snuggled up to you. You cried again, pressing a kiss to the top of his head. “Thank you,” you said softly. “You didn’t have to but you saved me. You saved us both.”

“It would seem the distinction between Haggar and Honerva means nothing to you.”

“Trust me, it does mean a great deal.”

“I _was_ Haggar, yes. But because of me, I’ve given you the strength to become a goddess.”

You pressed your lips together out of impatience. This was a pathetic attempt to appeal to your better nature. “Please, where is Lotor?”

“I am indebted to you, (Y/N). You have done the universe a great service. You have given my son happiness and proven your loyalty by protecting him in the quintessence rift. And now, you have delivered an heir to the new Altea.”

“‘The new Altea’?” 

“Yes. For that, you have earned a place in our new empire. Join me, and you and your son will be glorified.”

You speculated for a moment, piecing together the last few events and exchanges. Altea was destroyed. A new Altea meant finding a new reality, which would mean piercing reality once again.

The Sincline.

She meant to use you and Lotor. You couldn’t possibly believe her – she was deluded. This promise of peace was empty. Because it was Honerva, you had all the reason to suspect that this was a lie.

“Honerva, where is Lotor?”

You felt your hand being forcibly withdrawn from Taryn – cold, metal bounds kept your hands in place. Your eyes widened when she placed her hands on him. “W-what are you doing? Stop! _Stop!_ Leave my son alone! Don’t take him from me! Honerva, _please_! Honerva!” You tried to take him back, but your being was anchored. You cried and threw your body, but this was Altean alchemy that kept you chained. Honerva _gave_ you your powers – of course she had the means to control it.

Your heart shattered at the sound of Taryn’s cries. In Honerva’s arms, he screamed for your touch. She wore a sickening smile, attempting to quiet him. She made her way to the exit, then turned to look at you. In a panic, you shouted Lotor’s name, hoping to hear his voice through the walls.

“You will meet him soon enough. You both will become gods worshipped before the new Altea.”

 

* * *

 

"The day we first met was just like this, do you remember?" The Altean placed the tray at Lotor's side, setting utensils and mixtures to his liking. "You collected me from Galra imprisonment and brought me to the colony. You brought food to me. Then you reassured me that I was out of Haggar's reach. And here I am, doing the same for you."

Lotor said nothing. His hands rested at his lap, eyes closed. 

"We've come a long way since then. I owed you my life. You've taught me everything. Each time you left the colony, I practiced my sword. I thought of you everyday, waiting for you return. I loved you, you know."

"I'm not in the mood for entertainment, Merla. Where is (Y/N)?"

"There it is." she laughed softly, shaking her head. "You were always an enigma, so far out of our reach. How is it that that shebroke through?"

"Where is she?" 

"I've told you, only Honerva knows where she is being kept." 

Lotor growled, shoving the tray off his bedside. 

“My lord, please. You need to eat to regain your strength.” 

“You're not the one who wills it.”

“Your moth—”

“ _She is not my mother_.”

“Lady (Y/N), then. Stay strong for her.”

He remained silent. Although (Y/N)’s condition was reported to him, it was not enough. He was still, but he schemed. The past few days, he plotted avenues of escape, methods to make the witch _scream_. They were Honerva’s prisoners. He didn’t need food. All the fuel he needed was the anger that burned inside him.

“If you will not eat, please stand. Since your disappearance, the Alteans have been lost. Your return has renewed hope.”

“The Alteans remain lost. You all have misplaced your trust in the witch who destroyed Altea…and in me.”

“We’ve forgiven you, my lord. You had good intentions for our people. Honerva she…she sacrifices without remorse. After what happened on Oriande, we know we cannot afford to dwell on past mistakes. Believe me. Besides myself, there are a select few who still look to only you.”

"Out of all the apprentices I've taken, Merla, you were always the brightest. But never the bravest. If you need me as you so incessantly proclaim, then free me.” Lotor sighed in frustration and sat back as Merla pressed her lips together, avoiding his gaze. “You’re afraid of her. Then allow me to give you this piece of advice, Merla: Altea does not need a leader. It is time _the people_ take a stand. The new Altea will be made collectively by those who wish to protect it.”

 

* * *

 

For a time, she had hoped to leave the colony at Lotor's side. For deca-phoebs she waited, only to come face to face with the regret of cowardice. Romelle left, so why couldn't she? So she had taken up a role at Honerva's side, only to find that the decision was a fluke. Lotor rebuked her, for his heart had room for another. She had come to accept that their stars were never meant to align. 

Lotor’s words rang in Merla’s head. She had never known Altea. Its existence was shrouded with mystery, and yet its name inflicted pain into her heart. How could she be so indebted to a place she’s never been to? Lotor’s words had to be true, for each time Altea was threatened, she felt threatened and compelled to fight.

Merla stood alongside her fellow Alteans, assuming the position when Honerva entered the bridge. She carefully watched their expressions as they saluted. Like her, their pride masked their uncertainty.

Honerva stood at the helm and observed the controls. “We will proceed. Merla, I assume my son is sustained?”

“Yes, goddess. Emperor Lotor is prepared and ready for battle.” Honerva had been so sure of Merla’s loyalty, the series of lies she told had gone unnoticed.

“Excellent. When I return, have him boarded onto the Sincline. I will join him and Empress (Y/N) for tandem traversal as soon as possible. This time tomorrow, we will home in Altea.”

Merla nodded, turning to exit the bridge. When she had left the room, her walk progressed into a jog, then to a sprint. There would be so little time until Honerva would depart, she needed to act fast.

“For Altea.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TARYN (Tair-inn) - Derived from the name 'Taren' which means 'innocence' or 'thunder'.
> 
> * MC is 10 months by this chapter. In the rift, she was 4 months. Each jump through DoAR is 3 months. Since the Sincline jumped twice, that totals to 6 months.


	32. Through the Lions' Cage

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • Home – The Cloud Music  
> • All of the Stars – Jackie Evancho  
> • On Your Side – The Veronicas 
> 
> Oops - I accidentally posted the rough draft of the previous chapter. I just updated it, there's a lot of changes so please reread it to catch up to speed!

You exhaled, focusing the quintessence in the palms of your hands. You clenched your fists, pulsating the energy to break free. You tried this method over and over to no avail. Exhaustion took over, your hands cramping from the repeated action.

First Lotor, then Taryn. You only held your son once, just _once_. Honerva had taken your happiness more times than she needed to. You’d gladly give yourself to her in exchange for your son’s safety. You couldn’t understand her. She claimed to be willing to do anything for her family, but that inclination had also put them in harm’s way. As a mother, you’d go lengths to save Taryn but not at the cost of what was best for him.

You lifted your hands again, this time, pulling at the foundation of the chains. It was anchored by magic – only a spell of sorts could break the seal. Still, you would have a higher chance at escape if you kept trying. Taryn needed you to try. You wiped your tears with your shoulder and tugged even harder, using every bit of quintessence in your core.

Up until now, you’ve overcome every obstacle. Your aunt would have deemed them to be insurmountable, unthinkable. With Lotor, everything became possible. But you had neither of them or Honerva to thank for your strength. It was your heart that led you to this place – your instinct to survive to save your friends and family. This was only another trial. With Taryn now in mind, you were indomitable.

 _Think, (Y/N)_. There had to be something here to free you. You closed your eyes, easing your mind and allowing the quintessence to flow throughout your body.

This was Oriande, a place that provided infinite possibilities through the means of benevolent Altean alchemy. Or at least, that was its foundation. Honerva seemed to have corrupted that. Although you weren’t Altean, this place had no reason to brand you as malevolent. You were human, a race that flourished with an open mind and heart. Before, it was the Galra that molded you. Now, it was time to humble yourself before the Alteans.  

“Please,” you whispered. “I need help.”

A click.

The glow of magic faded from your bindings, then released your hands. You rubbed at your wrist and scanned the room. Soon after, the wall behind you had also clicked, slowly receding into itself to reveal an exit.

“...Thank you.”

 

* * *

 

Upon Merla’s entrance, only Lotor’s eyes moved. He watched her with disdain, then zoning back to developing a fortified escape plan. But when she made no effort to secure the exits, his attention returned. She stepped aside, gesturing for him to leave.

“We must hurry, my lord.”

“A change of mind?”

“A change of heart,” she said with a smile, tossing him his sword. 

Lotor wasted no time. He followed her through the corridor and looked to his devices. Out of containment, he was able to reactivate his tools. He opened his tracker, eyes anxiously searching for (Y/N)’s biorhythms. Puzzled, he raised an eyebrow. He half-expected it to be stagnant, but her avatar moved across the map. She had been running toward a different genetic signature. It was unrecognizable, but its coloration was similar to his…and hers.

“I've learned that Lady (Y/N) is being kept—”

“We needn’t worry about her, she can take care of herself. But I don’t understand why she’s running on the opposite direction. Merla, what am I seeing?” Lotor asked, raising his wrist device to her.

“I’m not sure. That cannot be your vitals. That is Oriande’s hearth. We’re located near the launch bay.”

Lotor’s stomach churned upon realization. Great vehemence radiated from his being. “ _That witch..._.” He drew his sword, turning the other way.

“My lord! Where are you going? We must stop Honerva from leaving with the Sincline!”

 

* * *

 

You raced through the corridors, following the beam of light that guided your path. Your apprehension made you clumsy, bumping into corners and walls. The trek was long, but eventually reached the end. You came across two massive doors, an entryway to a grand room. You pushed and pulled with all your might, but no luck. Throwing your fists against the surface created no effect. The seam of the opening was cemented and sealed with more magic, making it impossible for regular entry. You stepped back and looked all around, hoping to find an alternate opening.

“Don’t bring me here to shut me out,” you mumbled.

“(Y/N)!”

Your attention snapped to your left. There was Lotor, running toward you at full speed. Before you could react, he engulfed your being into his arms. Your voice was cut off by a fervent kiss, then another embrace. While he imposingly drowned you in affection, Merla stepped forward to clear her throat. Albeit, you were glad to see Lotor but much to your ecstaticity, you understood what she meant.

“Are you hurt, my love?”

“I’m fine. We need to hurry and open this door. I can’t punch through. ...Who’s this?”

“This is Merla. She was one my underlings in the colony. She has come to help us.”

“It is an honor to meet my lord’s lady,” she said with a bow.

“The pleasure’s all mine.” You extended your hand to reach hers, shaking it. “Thank you so much for doing this. Our son’s on the other side of this door. Can you open it?”  

“This door is not of Oriande. We constructed this door from the materials of our colony. Only Altean magic can open it,” Merla said. “But those powers are beyond me.”

“I may not possess the abilities, but I will try.” Lotor stepped forward, placing his hand on the wall. Ripples of light emerged from his hand. He touched it for a bit longer, but no other change occurred. “It’s not enough,” he said frustratedly.

You bit your thumb, trying to recall your feeling of nostalgia. “…The Rajex System!” When you came upon the memory, you rushed to his side, placing your hand on the other door. More ripples also escaped your hand, both doors becoming opaque.  

“Well done, (Y/N)!” Lotor cheered.

“It’s still not enough. Keep holding it until we can see through the other side!” The door changed, transitioning from opaque to transparent. “Okay, stand back!” Before the doors returned, you threw your hand against it, causing it to shake and crumble apart.

Merla fell to her bottom and yelped. “M-my lord...Lady (Y/N) is…”

“Magnificent, right?”

“So much more than a pretty face,” you said to yourself. 

 _Trovar was wrong._  

The hearth was vast; colossal pillars filled the empty space. Every surface had a pillar: the ceilings, walls, and floors. Cords materialized from each of the pillars’ ends. They were tangled like jungle vines and hung in every direction, creating a canopy of transmitted energy. In the center a light shone over a single bassinet. Its placement was so grossly inapt.

“Taryn!” you and Lotor cried.

You ran and scooped the bundle into your arms, frantically examining him. You wept from relief, smothering him in affection as Lotor did you.

“What is this?” Merla stuttered. “I’ve never seen this chamber before.”

“Now you see. Haggar isn’t a witch,” Lotor bristled. “She’s a demon. She threatened to use our child as an energy source in order to make us compliant.”

“Every finger and toe accounted for,” you said softly with a laugh. “Come meet your son.”

Lotor’s anger melted away upon the sight of you and Taryn. As you approached him, he stood with incredulity. He meekly held out his hands then cradled Taryn with great caution. He lifted Taryn, pressing their cheeks together. Lotor sighed exultantly. “Oh, (Y/N)…he’s so beautiful.” A tear fell from his eye, landing on Taryn’s little nose. Taryn stirred, opening his eyes to see his father for the first time. “My little star. I’ve been waiting so long for you.”

“I’m sorry to interrupt, but you must leave,” Merla said. “Honerva’s expects the both of you to be boarded onto the Sincline as soon as she returns. I fear that she may already suspect something.”

“We can’t let her have the Sincline,” you urged. “We have to stop her.”

“There is no ‘we’, (Y/N). You’re not going into that encasement,” Lotor reprimanded. He kissed Taryn’s forehead, returning him into your arms. “Take our son and escape this place. I will pilot the Sincline alone and prevent the tandem traversal.”

“What? You’re kidding, right? Hell no! Did you forget what happened _the last time_ you did that? You need a co-pilot to keep you grounded.”

“Taryn needs his mother.”

“And his _father_. Are you seriously suggesting that he only needs one of us?”

“Haggar has placed a dark entity within me. Merla’s right. The witch could be on her way now and when she arrives, I will kill her, but not before I make her suffer.”

“Lotor, look at me,” you said firmly, grabbing his wrist and pulling him toward you. “How many times do I have to tell you? My place is at your side. You’re not alone anymore, Lotor.”

_Right._

_My promise._

How silly of him to forget the declaration he made to Sanda. “Yes, of course, darling.” He chuckled and caressed your cheek. “Forgive me. I haven’t quite adjusted to the inclusivity of family.”  

“So, together?”

“Yes, together. First, we take care of the entity. Merla, how much time do we have until the witch returns?”

Merla blinked multiple times, trying to process the events that just occurred. She’d never seen Lotor so…yielding. Even so, it gave her some relief to know her idol wasn’t made of stone. (Y/N) Sanda’s reputation was no longer a mystery. She did not fear Lotor, nor did she hesitate to question him. Merla’s heart warmed. The image of Lotor was no longer lonesome. When she pictured his back, (Y/N) would be beside him.  

“She left about one varga ago, but time dilation makes it difficult to say. Her actions themselves are unpredictable.”

“What is she doing now?” you asked.

“She’s browsing through realities to find the perfect one,” she answered. “But that could take vargas, quintants?”

“There’s time,” Lotor said. “For now, we must delay her plans. We’ll take the Sincline from this place and find refuge, a safe place for Taryn. From there, we will delve into Haggar’s mind so that I can break free of her curse.”

Merla stepped forward. “Wait! Where will you go? The Voltron Coalition has been made aware of the Sincline’s return.  They’ll shoot without hesitation.”

You pouted. “She’s right. We can’t go back to Shiro just yet. If we’re caught in a crossfire between Honerva and Voltron, that’ll put Taryn in danger.”

“Central Command, then. Bemusing, but we’ll look to the Galra.”

“Right, then,” Merla said. “We must hurry.”

You all followed her to launch bay and into the Sincline. As Lotor readied the controls, Merla assisted you in settling Taryn in. She had provided more than enough sustenance packets to support you through the journey. On top of that, she shared an up to date star chart, giving you the last known locations of the empire’s posts. When everything was set, you exchanged a few more pleasantries and sat at your station.

“Merla, why don’t you come with us?” you offered.

“I cannot,” she said frankly. “I also have the entity, that would only endanger my lord and lady even more. I also cannot abandon my fellow Alteans. I must do what I can here to protect them.”

“But—”

“She’s right, (Y/N). Merla has the witch’s trust. And thanks to her, we have the advantage in this war. Altea lives through you, Merla.. I am proud of you. Your courage will not be forgotten. We are forever in your debt – thank you.”

“My lord,” she said elatedly. She pressed her lips together, fighting the urge to cry. She took a step back and exited the Sincline.

The Sincline launched, flying away at full power to escape the vicinity of Oriande. You watched the ship on the map, keeping tabs on incoming ships. However, you didn’t recognize the structures of the empire’s star systems. You and Lotor anticipated the worst after learning that three years had passed in real time. The inevitable happened; after Lotor’s disappearance, the Galra empire had fallen apart. Without him, his subjects were powerless against his enemies. According to the map, Galran solidarity continued through the Blade of Marmora. So, if that were true, Central Command would be unoccupied.   

You held Taryn close to you, monitoring his every movement and reaction. It pained you to see his first few days spent this way. Lotor stood from his seat and knelt beside you, kissing the top of both your heads.

“How is he?” he asked, rubbing your back.

“Sleeping. He’s knocked out. He’s been so calm throughout everything. I don’t know how that’s possible.”

“We’ve been blessed with the perfect child. You should rest, my love.”

“It’s all right. I don’t want to move him, he looks so comfortable.”

“I’m sorry. I’m not much help…”

“Don’t apologize,” you said, kissing and caressing his cheek to comfort him. “You’ve done everything right so far. To be fair, we’re not exactly experts. But that’s why we have each other. We’re both going to learn.”

Lotor leaned into your hand, touched at your words. The sweet moment was disturbed by an alarm, indicating the arrival in the empire. You were currently in the Burjon Quadrant, making headway to the Central Command System. Some of the planets were missing, or completely drained of quintessence.

“What happened here?” you gasped.

“The planets within the empire were most likely the witch’s first line of victims. The Komar should have never existed.”

After a few hours, you had returned to the former heart of the Galra Empire. It was once menacing, but grand. Also, formerly your prison, it had become your home. And now it was a place of salvation.

“Do you detect any biorhythms?”

“No. Not according to our scanners, anyway. But if someone was here, wouldn’t they have fired by now?”

“Well, we’ll see,” he muttered. “Attention, Galra Central Command. This is Emperor Lotor – I have returned.”

No response.

“Even the gas planets are empty. What’s going on?” you said.

“If there’s anyone in there, we’ll have to go in and check for ourselves.”

Lotor landed the Sincline in its designated station. You collected your weapons, securing Taryn in a makeshift sling. Proceeding with caution, you both made your way to the core control room. So far, it was desolate. Everything was out of commission – alarms and sentries were deactivated. There was no light to guide your path either, so you both relied on memory.

“Scavengers must’ve stripped the empire of every resource. If they were smart, they’d clean this place of its intelligence. The quintessence canisters are – (Y/N)? What’s wrong?”

You pressed a finger to your lips, then pointed at Taryn. He whined. The place was so empty that his little voice echoed off the walls. The whine progressed into a whimper, then a full cry. You shrugged at Lotor. You couldn’t maintain the incognito act for long.

“He’s probably hungry again,” he sighed.

“Ok, but I can’t feed him if we’re – Lotor, look out!”

His head whisked over his shoulder, blocking the attacker with his sword. They were rather large, face was covered in a mask. They used brute, relentless force to subdue him. Lotor fought them off with speed and finesse. He blocked off their fist with the hilt of his sword, and then yelled your name.

In the heat of the moment, you failed to notice your own attacker. Your breath hitched when you felt something wrap around your neck, aiming to suffocate you while pulling you back. You grunted, planting your feet to the ground to reassert yourself. You shielded Taryn with one arm, then grabbed at the attacker’s appendage with the other. But when you turned to face them, your grip loosened.

“E-Ezor?” you choked. “Ezor, please stop!”

She immediately released her hold, running at your side. “(Y/N)? Y-you’re alive!”

You turned back to Lotor, waving at his attacker. “Zethrid, stop! It’s us!”

“(Y/N)?” Zethrid said, voice muffled. She unmasked herself, revealing her newly marred appearance. “What are you doing with Lotor?!”

“She’s _my mate_. Of course she’s with me,” Lotor huffed. When she released him, he ran to your side and took Taryn into his arms. He hushed him, swaying to lull him back to sleep.

“Yeah right,” Ezor said bitterly. “You used her, just like you used us. So, what? Is your kid a to-go battery?”

You frowned. “Ezor…”

 “Clearly, the glory of independence is not suited for you. I see that the years have taken more than a physical toll. So, where do your allegiances lie now?” Lotor mocked.

“The Voltron Coalition. But it still varies from time to time,” she said.  

“How is it possible that you’re still alive?” Zethrid gruffed. “You were both stuck in the quintessence field.”

“Honerva freed us,” you said. “But she planned on using us to have the Sincline traverse realities. We escaped so that Lotor could break free from her entity.”

“Entity? What entity?” asked Ezor.

“The dark entity,” a voice said.

You turned to the shadows, eyes widening. “Axca…”

“It’s the same one she implanted on the Alteans to do her dirty work. And now, Princess Allura has it.” She glowered at Lotor and crossed her arms. “I believe _you_ have something to do with that?”

“I had no choice,” he alleged. “She used (Y/N) and my son against me. If anything, I gave the princess a tool to bring the coalition one step closer to victory.”

“Be that as it may, you’re still an enemy. You can’t expect the coalition to welcome you with open arms. You’re a wanted criminal.”

“What I did was for the good of the universe.”

“Uh-huh...” Ezor stepped forward. “We killed for you to have a clear enough conscience to make decisions ‘for the good of the universe’.”

“ _STOP_!” you shouted. “Look, no one can erase the past ten thousand deca-phoebs. The fact of the matter is that we’re here now and we’re here to help. We can’t do that if we’re fighting each other. Lotor might not be the most popular person in the universe right now, but I’ll be damned if the coalition doesn’t accept us as allies.”

"How can we trust him after what he did to Narti?" asked Zethrid. 

"Don't speak to me as if I've slaughtered her," Lotor hissed. "I liberated her. Another one of my friends taken by the witch." 

"We were all still on the same side," you said. "Honerva's the one who pitted us against each other from the start. She's the real enemy."

“…All right, fine,” Axca sighed. “You’re lucky to have (Y/N), Lotor.”

You smiled. Axca always had your back. “So, you’ll have us?”

“For now. I don’t think the coalition can afford to have another entity-ridden person on board the Atlas – especially someone as significant as Lotor. If Honerva comes to retrieve him and the Sincline, it puts the whole coalition at risk. We’ll need him to get rid of it. Maybe I can call the princess to—”

“No. We don’t need the princess,” Lotor said. “I can do it myself.”

“You’re planning on entering Honerva’s mind,” Axca said.

“How do you know that?” he asked.

“One of the perks of being a part of the coalition is that _all_ personnel are briefed. The Paladins are planning to do the exact same thing. They’re convinced that it may hold the key on how to defeat her. In fact, they may be there now.”

Lotor scoffed. “The removal of the Sincline is already a key step. But they’re not wrong.”

You took Taryn from Lotor’s arms. “Lotor, are you sure? If there’s a chance to remove it right here and now, wouldn’t that be safer?”

“There may be more that we can use to our advantage. If Voltron is entering her mind, it’s possible for you to join me. She’s much too strong – together, we may be able to find something that the Paladins cannot.”

“And Taryn?”

“We can watch him. I love babies!” Ezor perked up.

You and Lotor turned your heads to the former generals. Zethrid was rough, Ezor was cynical, and Axca was cold. It wasn’t ideal, but there were… worse caretakers. After all, they were once your companions. You looked back to each other and inwardly groaned.

Axca rolled her eyes. “This is the base for the Blade of Marmora. Keith's mother should be returning soon, we can have her watch over him. In the meantime, we’ll try not to break him.”

“Krolia’s here?” You sighed in relief. “Oh, thank god. Er – not that I didn’t trust you guys.”

“Well, I don’t,” Lotor snapped.  

“ _You_ have no choice,” Axca retorted. “There isn’t enough time. Either you let us have the baby until Krolia returns so that _we_ can guard the Sincline or we wait for Honerva to find us.”

Lotor clicked his tongue, turning a heel to storm back to the Sincline.

"Stubborn prince," you laughed, gently handing Taryn to Zethrid. “Thank you.”

“Pretty refreshing to see the roles reversed,” Ezor snickered. “’bout time we put him in his place.”

“Are you sure about going with Lotor? Can you trust him?” asked Zethrid.  

“Yes,” you said confidently. “We’ve made it this far together, haven’t we?”

Before you returned to Lotor, Axca grabbed your hand then smiled with utmost sincerity.

“It’s good to see you again, (Y/N).”  


	33. Endless Meets the End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • Saving Light (INTERCOM Remix) – INTERCOM/Gareth Emery/Haliene  
> • Chosen – Generdyn/Svrcina  
> • Keeping Your Head Up – Birdy 
> 
> I'M SO SORRY THIS CHAPTER TOOK SO LONG. Kingdom Hearts 3 kept inspiring me to complete many, many creative projects. To make up for the hiatus, I made this chapter a bit longer than the others. If there are grammatical/spelling errors, I'll get around to those soon - I tried to get this chapter out as quickly as I could ;;;;

Life returned to Central Command upon the Blades’ return. Although under Galran jurisdiction, sinister forces were no longer present. A new chain of command had been established with Krolia and Kolivan as its leaders. You were surprised to learn that Axca, Ezor, and Zethrid had pledged themselves to the Blade but more ecstatic to learn that Eylek and Groven were still alive. Every soldier had heart and shared the same goal: to take down Honerva and reform the Galran empire. The empire had yet to be restored to its former glory, the era that knew peace and prosperity before Voltron.

So much has changed in your three-year absence. What you were looking at was like a reflection of the universe you once knew. Vast distances and planetary, cultural differences were no longer a separating factor. There was solidarity, community. Humans, Altean, and Galra alike worked together. It was a vision that Lotor could only dream about. But in a reality so ideal, where did you and Lotor fit?

Your hand grazed over the throne. Cold and empty, it was a reminder that the title of emperor had always been a burdensome one. When Lotor sat here, you did what you could to see his vision through. Now, the empire was nonexistent, and no longer in need of an emperor.

The click of footsteps echoed throughout the throne room. Your back was turned, focus still lingering on the empty seat.

“(Y/N), the Sincline is ready for departure.”

You nodded, allowing yourself to picture Lotor as emperor one last time.

“Thank you, Groven.”

 

* * *

 

The past quintant had been dedicated to revitalizing the Sincline and sharing all confidential intel to the Blades. With the new information Lotor provided, the Blades were able to access more of Central Command’s resources. Lotor’s cooperation gave him safe passage _and_ discrimination.

As Groven escorted you to the launch bay, you heard arguing voices. You grimaced to find Lotor at the center, subject to yet another interrogation.

“Are you sure this plan will work?” asked Kolivan.

“I don’t like it,” Krolia said, arms crossed. “We should be containing him, not sending him back out. How can we trust you?”

Lotor kept his composure, but by the twitch of his brow and lip, you could tell he was growing tired of these confrontations. “(Y/N) will be beside me.”

“I know what that really means,” she said. “Keith and I found your colony. You’ll never use anyone as an energy source ever again. _Especially_ (Y/N). Not while I’m around.”

“(Y/N) is not a scapegoat. You and your son were misguided,” Lotor countered. “I know how you all feel about me. I know my past actions are inexcusable, my sins do not go unacknowledged. But believe me when I say that I have paid greatly for them. I am willingly putting myself at risk so that I may save this and all realities. I could care less about redemption. If I had been given the chance to _explain myself_ , then the witch wouldn’t be given the opportunity to exploit the Alteans in the manner that I have been accused of. The princess and Voltron preach mercy, but they undertook my punishment without trial, and therefore without consequence leaving not only me, but (Y/N) to rot in the quintessence field. I am not solely to blame.”

“Krolia your concerns are valid,” Kolivan said as he stepped forward between the two. “But the attack on the Blades’ was ordered by Honerva. By our side, Lotor does increase the chance of our odds at victory.”

“Kolivan, listen to yourself. Our allies were slaughtered because of the former emperor’s absence.”

“He is Galra. He stood for us.”

“He’s also Altean. The same people we’re fighting against.”

Lotor bristled. “How long am I to be punished for my biracial heritage – a factor, that is completely out of my control? I’ve survived the consequence of preconceived notions about my race for millenia. This is no different. If that is the only thing withholding you from making the right decision, then I will take myself and my family elsewhere.”

You walked past Groven to stand by your lover’s side. True, so far, he has solely beaten every obstacle. But your promised to change that. Fate brought you to Lotor to help him break through. The support of your extended hand was enough to change his life.

“Krolia,” you began. “Lotor is one of the many half-Galran children who struggled to find their identity and place in this universe. In the process of doing so, many did find faults, including Keith. No path is perfect, but everyone is trying to make amends and do good. So, let me be the one to say that Lotor can be trusted beyond his race.”

“Right…” Krolia sighed, placing a hand on her hip. “So, we let you go. But why take (Y/N)?”

“Because we’re a team,” you said with a smile. “We trust each other. Plus, together, we’re more likely to get the job done together.”

“Yes, together,” Lotor chuckled softly, taking your hand and squeezing it. “I have everything to lose if Haggar wins. That’s why I’m risking everything. By relinquishing our son under your care, we’re placing our trust in you.”

“All we’re asking is for you to trust us,” you said. “We want the universe to be safe, especially for Taryn.”

Krolia and Kolivan exchanged a look, then stepped aside and gestured at the Sincline’s entry. You expected their reaction to be more offensive, but instead, they shook their heads with a smile. Now, it was you and Lotor that raised an eyebrow at each other.

“We haven’t yet alerted the Coalition of your arrival,” Kolivan stated. “With Krolia and I making the executive decision the both of you out there, we may be reprimanded. With someone as important as Lotor under our authority, we’d be wasting more time over moral discussion.”

“Somehow, I knew you’d use Keith against me,” Krolia scoffed. “As the head of Voltron, he made his own list of demands about you two. If we had done anything to retrain you, (Y/N), we’d never hear the end of it. He’ll be more impulsive than ever, which may do more harm than good to morale. Now hurry and get that entity out of your brain.”

“Right, then. Thank you. Come, (Y/N). We haven’t anymore time to waste,” Lotor said before rushing to the cockpit.

You turned to the heads of the Blades and bowed. “Thank you to you both.”

Kolivan gave an acknowledging nod whilst Krolia placed a hand on your shoulder. “I’ll take care of your son – just like you did for mine. Good luck to the both of you.”

You hurried back to Lotor, but just before entering the Sincline, you couldn’t forget formality of departure. The time has passed, but the Galran traditions weren’t completely changed. You stood up straight and saluted proudly.

“Blade of Marmora – vrepit sa!”

 

* * *

 

Central Command remained still while the Sincline had been freed. They waited in anticipation, ready for any potential threats. While they protected you externally, you and Lotor were to mediate in order to enter the realm of Honerva’s mind. You closed your eyes, focusing on every aspect your relationship with Lotor. Through the Sincline, your shared connection of mind, body, and spirit would allow you both to traverse the physical reality.

In the peace of the moment, Lotor broke the silence and exhaled. “Are you ready?”

You hummed and braced yourself. “Let’s go.”

Immediately, everything had been engulfed by a blinding, white light. All sound had been drowned out by a momentary screech. You felt the air push out from your body, almost as if your body had been compacted. This feeling was the delivery of your beings transported to Honerva’s mind. By withstanding the transition, you and Lotor found yourself in space, one bright light shone before you while smaller beams rushed out of it.

“I’m guessing we made it,” you said, voice echoing. “What now, Lotor?”

“Something is telling me to move toward that bright light. This place is no different than the quintessence, if not more dangerous. We mustn’t let the witch know that we are here. We must be careful. Stay by my side.”

You nodded and took Lotor’s hand, allowing him to guide the both of you through the various parts of Honerva’s mind. Storms of electricity, vast stretches of space, closed rooms. He was right; the ambiance was very much similar to the rift: overwhelming, cold, and endless. As a scientist, you were in awe at the possibility of entering one’s mind. Altean alchemy was terrifying. Here, the soul could easily be corrupted by the psychic influences all around you, but this was nothing new. You and Lotor had the shared notion was that this experience would be endurable. Survive, find the entity, and eradicate it. But throughout your journey, the guiding light grew smaller and smaller. This alarmed you, but Lotor continued with determination.

“Lotor, at some point, we’re not going to have a destination. Let’s turn back – maybe we’ll find the light at a different turn.”

“No. The entity draws me toward the darkness. Don’t be afraid, we’ll still have light to guide our path.”

“We do?”

“Yes. Because you’re my light, (Y/N).” He squeezed your hand and gave you a quick smile. “We should reach the void soon. Prepare yourself.”

A black hole appeared when the last bit of light faded. Its menacing entry could only signal that _this_ is where you were meant to go. As you grew closer to it, anything and everything in its path had been sucked in like a vacuum. Powerful winds drew you in and before being completely engulfed, Lotor pulled you into his chest. You didn’t fight the black hole’s intentions and rushed through. Upon entering its depths, the entry closed behind you.

Miraculously, you found yourself aboard the Sincline again. Your breathing was unsteady. What were you supposed to gain from those series of events? “Why are we in the Sincline? Did we come back?”

“No,” Lotor answered. “Haggar’s mind must have transported us here. But the question is, where?”

Where, indeed – you didn’t recognize this planet. It was practically a barren wasteland, nothing but rock and dirt as far as the eye could see. The air was dusty, and the clouds overhead were thick with smog.

“I’ve seen many planets like these. This is what remains after it is drained of its quintessence.”

Through the dust storm, a silhouetted figure began to approach. Lotor readied one of the Sincline’s swords, and you, its right fist. But when the moment it completely shown, you both lessened your apprehension.

“It is an Altean mech,” gasped Lotor. “One that I’ve only read about and seen in pictures.”

“Is it Honerva’s?”

“No. No records indicated that she owned or created a weapon like this. She – _argh_!”

The mech caught you both off guard, taking the opportunity to punch at the Sincline’s head. You were sent flying back until you hit a rock wall. Not only it was strong, it was _fast_. Lotor barely had time to block its fists with the sword. He shouted for you to initiate an attack but it beat you to it – kicking the Sinline’s right shoulder and pushing it further into the rubble.

“Activate 100% capacity – this is no ordinary warship we’re dealing with!”

“We can’t take it on 70%? We were just caught off guard!”

“We’re in the witch’s mind – this guardian means to protect something. We must find out what!”

You nodded, shifting your controls to appropriate the right amount of quintessence to expend. With a cry, you used your strength to withdraw the fist and sent it forward. It was enough to return initial attack, sending the mech backward with more force. Then, Lotor rushed forward to drive the sword into its chest plate but not before you pinned its head to the ground. However, lasers burst from its eyes to blind your vision, creating another opportunity for offense. You shielded the windshield with the arm while Lotor held the sword to brace for another attack. Warning sirens went off, indicating that another punch was imminent.

“(Y/N), activate shock absorption! As soon as it makes contact, return to 100% capacity!”

“All right!”

When the light faded, its incoming fist came into view. As soon as the attack landed, you pushed the controls again but this time, to redistribute the kinetic energy from its second attack. The mech was shocked, then moving disorderly. You and Lotor smirked. This was an asset he had developed in the rift to protect the Sincline from shocks of quintessence. Its effectiveness of course gave you the option to use it for battle.

“Its pilot is confused – now, let’s end this! (Y/N)”

You both shouted, using every bit of quintessence to feed the Sincline’s power, speed, and strength. While you provided that boost, Lotor raised the sword and finally pierced its armor. An explosion followed, releasing the mass of quintessence that fueled the mech. The entire ship disintegrated into light crystals to reveal the pilot at is center. At a closer glance, you gasped.

“Allura!”

You reached forward to catch her in the Sincline’s hands, then gently place her on the ground. You and Lotor immediately exited, running to her side to provide aid. You frantically checked her vitals, relieved to know that she had no major injuries. But when you paid closer attention to her face, something didn’t feel quite the same. “This isn’t…Allura.”

“It can’t be,” Lotor stuttered. The woman regained consciousness, finally sitting up on her own. She had a similar appearance, but the gleam in her eye was softer, kinder. There was a gentleness about her that Allura did not possess. “Queen Melenor?”

“Honerva?” she whispered. When her vision cleared, she rubbed her temple. “No…where…where am I?”

“You’re inside the void of Honerva’s mind,” you answered.

“(Y/N) Sanda, Prince Lotor – thank you for freeing me.”

“You know us, your majesty?” Lotor asked incredulously. “How is that possible?”

“Upon my defeat, your ship has communicated visions into my mind. The past 10,000 years…the Galra and the return of Voltron.”

“Your majesty, how is it that you became trapped in Honerva’s mind?” you asked.

Melenor closed her eyes, painfully recalling the past. Her hands turned to fists, tightening the grip until her knuckles turned white. “Preservation,” she said bitterly. “As you know, Haggar meant to help Zarkon drive the Alteans to extinction. Exterminate us like mice. As queen, it was my duty to perform any means possible to protect them. Altea is a people, not a place. Alfor knew that. He stayed fighting to his very last breath, allowing me to evacuate and lead our people to safety. I provided a haven, piloting the Novaturient as their guardian.  But Haggar soon learned that a significant number of us remained in hiding. She knew better than to underestimate my tenacity. Eventually, she had found us, resulting in great bloodshed. In order to ensure the longevity of our race, I had to extract small portions of quintessence from each Altean. I retained that power in order to recognize the genetic makeup of every individual so that we may reconvene again. But Haggar’s druids were far too powerful, ultimately leading to my defeat. However, at the cost of my life, I had used the last bit of my power to transfer it to another.”

Lotor’s eyes widened in shock. He stepped back, completely stunned by his realization. “It was me. You had given me that power.”

“Yes. You were given the ability to find the Alteans scattered throughout the cosmos. With your mixed race, I knew you would be the future of our people. You are hope personified, Lotor.”

“But if you had seen the visions – you would know that is wrong. I am not the future, Queen Melenor, I-I betrayed their trust. I failed our people. I _killed_ them, I—”

“You were _misguided_ , Lotor.” Melenor stood, taking his face into her hands. “I have seen the horrors you have endured from birth. There are no easy choices in war, much less of the right ones. Leaders like us will often face failure. But it is only through failure that we learn.”

“And of Allura? She is still a great leader without failure.”

Melenor sighed, withdrawing her hands and held them together. “I am proud of my daughter, but unfortunately, her father’s influence has blinded her on occasion. Sometimes, the best way to counter your enemies is with patience and mercy.”

Since the rift, you had not given Allura much thought. Like her, you were deceived by Lotor. You couldn’t blame her for reaction so rashly – especially when it concerned her people. But to make the conscious decision of acting on violence than diplomacy…

That is what separated you from Allura.

Patience and mercy had always rewarded you. Enduring the hardships of your life had lead you to meet the love of your life.

“Lotor, you are far from perfect. Only through imbalance can we know peace. On behalf of the Alteans, I apologize for all transgressions made against you. Although I cannot pardon your decision to colonize our people – I recognize your heart. You did mean to save our people. Preservation was your goal, and that is what you have accomplished. We, the Alteans, are indebted to you, a Galran.”

You recalled the moments in which Allura made decisions based on discrimination against the Galra: Keith, the Blade of Marmora, and Lotor. From the beginning, had she met them halfway, much turmoil could have been avoided. For Melenor, her own _mother_ , to make such a statement…validated Lotor’s existence.

He was ecstatic beyond recognition. This has been the first time someone of his own kind recognized his value holistically. It was a fair judgement – one that he had waited to hear ages ago.

He fell to knees, tears fell from his eyes. “Queen Melenor, I am not worthy of your gracious judgement…”

You smiled, kneeling beside him and embracing his trembling figure. Melenor approached you both, beaming down at both of you. Her charisma was overwhelming but had a calming effect. She placed a hand on Lotor’s shoulder, then yours.  

“And you, (Y/N) Sanda – you have a gentle heart. The last time I’ve witnessed such kindness is well…through myself,” she mused. “You have saved many lives through the act of healing.”

You gushed, unsure of how to accept her judgement. A ‘thank you’ is all you managed to say, but Melenor continued:

“The universe attains perfect balance by marrying two singularities. Time and space. Earth and sky. Ice and fire. Myself and Alfor. Zarkon and Honerva. And now, they bring together (Y/N) and Lotor. It is ferocity and sanctity that you provide – the two energies that bring the galaxy to salvation. By loving one another, you can prove to them mercy and forgiveness gives life to many possibilities. Your love has brought you to me. I will give you the means to stop Honerva.”

“Will you be taking the dark entity placed within me?” Lotor asked.

“No. As long as my soul is trapped in Honerva’s mind, unfortunately, I cannot. Rather than taking, I will be giving. I give you my blessing and bestow you the Novaturient and its powers.”

“But we arrived here using the Sincline,” you said. “Is it possible to transport a mech from Honerva’s mind to…y’know what? I’m not even going to question it.  I know anything’s possible at this point.”

Melenor and Lotor laughed. “I’ve never heard of the Novaturient. If it is piloted by you, I can only assume that it is equipped with special abilities,” he said.

“Did you think my husband to be the only one gifted in alchemic abilities? It is not constructed from a trans-reality comet, but it up to par with Voltron’s many facets. It may give you the necessary powers to defeat Honerva.”

You frowned. “Not alone, right? We’d be helping Voltron.”

“Yes. Speaking of them…there is one more thing I must inquire from you.”

Allying with the Altean Queen meant reconciling with King Alfor…and Voltron…and its pilots. A grunt of disapproval escaped Lotor as he crossed his arms. He didn’t like where this was going.

“What is it?”

 


	34. Into the Fiery Light

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • Disarm You - Kaskade/Ilsey  
> • New Divide - J2/Avery  
> • Winds of Winter - Ramin Djawadi 
> 
> Hey, y'all. I apologize for the sporadic/late updates. With the end of Avengers and Game of Thrones, I've finally had the motivation to rewatch Voltron and find the motivation to write for DOAR. I intend to finish this fic within the year, so hopefully y'all are still looking forward to seeing more to this story. 
> 
> Just as a reminder, this chapter takes place during S8 Episode 9 and 10.

In this place, anything could happen. I realized that quickly.

It’d be an understatement to call Honerva’s mind a hell. Dangerous and chaotic, no one could survive this place on their own – which is exactly why I had no doubt that Team Voltron would come out victorious. This was like any other mission, honestly. We just had to work together and have faith in ourselves and our lions.

We’ve seen so much, overcome so many obstacles, defeated so many enemies…I believe that everything we’ve ever done has led us to this moment. Still, we’d never be prepared for the spiritual and physical complexities of someone’s _mind_. Yes, we decided to follow through with Allura’s plan as a team, but we didn’t know what to expect, none of us did. The visions and memories were much different than the ones I’ve seen in the quantum abyss.

From what I seen, I couldn’t exactly sympathize with Honerva. She killed the Paladins of Old and since then, every decision she had made hurt someone in some way.

Shiro…and (Y/N)…she hurt my family. The closer we got to the entity’s source, the more recent her memories. My anger burned all the more.

I knew it. (Y/N) was alive; the memories were proof of that. Seeing her face was like a part of my heart returned. It took everything I had to control myself. This wasn’t the time or place to act on truth, I knew that. I couldn’t afford to risk our lives. Voltron still needed a leader, and I needed them to keep me grounded.

“Pidge, any idea what part of her brain we’re in now?” Hunk asked.

“No, I’m not sure.”

The echo of Honerva’s memories suddenly grew louder and louder, until it was deafening.

“Keith, grab my hand!” Allura said, reaching out to me. “Everyone, feel the energy of the entity within you. Don’t fight it – let it guide you!”

Easier said than done. It was hard to do when Honerva’s voice was breaking my eardrums. Holding onto Allura and Hunk’s hands helped me to focus, finding relief when our minds were in sync. The energy of the environment immediately changed. It was a quiet and peaceful flower field which apparently, was Honerva’s memory of Altea.

“This must be the way Honerva remembers it,” Pidge said. “It must be a place she holds dear. We should be close.”

Lance sighed. “I wonder what kind of weird, freaky thing is gonna attack us here.”

Of course, a mech landed right behind us. But not just any – it was clear that its decal reflected Zarkon’s colors.

“Ah! Does that answer your question?!” Hunk yelled.

Without our lions, we had to act fast. Survival was of the utmost importance.

“Find safety! I’ll distract it,” I said.

“What?! No way!”

“Just go!”

My heart raced painfully. Many emotions surged through me, but the last of it was fear. _Now_ was the time to set myself free – express the anger and heartbreak I’ve felt all these years.

“You were their leader! They trusted you, and you betrayed them! You don’t deserve the Black Lion!”

In that moment, my passion had summoned my lion’s appearance – along with the other Paladins’. Alone, we struggled against Zarkon. But we were also connected with the Paladins of Old. They emerged, joining their powers with ours. It wasn’t hard to defeat Zarkon. Everyone gave it their all. Through Voltron, I could feel our shared thoughts and emotions. We were all angry, sad, and broken. Those feelings intensified when his lion and body appeared before us.

Unlike before, his presence was calm. Kinder, even. He looked like a completely different person. The way his face lit up seeing his old comrades…I didn’t know what to make of it. What could I say? Hell, was there even anything to say? There were so many things running through my mind but of course, Allura had beat everyone to the punch.

Zarkon stared at her in complete shock. “Melenor? What are you doing here?”

“Melenor was my mother, and you murdered her! You’ve killed millions!” She grabbed his head, sending him an energy that made him scream.

“Allura, what are you doing?!” said Lance.

“Reminding him of the suffering he’s caused.”

Zarkon fell to his knees. I expected this sort of reaction from Allura. With everything she’d been through, it was necessary that he’d be punished in this way. At first, I wanted to beat him, make him suffer too. But seeing his reaction, well, it didn’t seem right. This Zarkon _was_ a completely different person. But this was also the same Zarkon who had made the decision to change. Still, something was...off.

“N-no,” Zarkon whispered.

“You did that. All of it!”

“I’m sorry I…I didn’t realize what I—”

“You knew exactly what you were doing. You deceived and betrayed your friends and allies!”

“The Quintessence…it blinded me. And you all suffered because of it.”

“If you’re truly sorry for what you’ve done, then help us stop her. You must have been placed here to protect something. What is it?”

“I don’t know. I…I’m sorry.”

“ _What are you protecting_?!”

“Allura, that is enough!”

Another voice? We all turned. Behind us, two mechs. One I didn’t recognize but the other was the Sincline. I gasped in realization and summoned by bayard instinctively. When my eyes darted to the figures approaching us, I froze.

“Lotor…(Y/N)?!”

“Wait, you two are alive?!” Hunk exclaimed.

I wanted to run – I wanted to hold her and apologize a thousand times. But my feet couldn’t move. Somehow, it’s like my body had a mind of its own, knowing the situation was too fragile. I still stuttered her name in a pathetic attempt to make sure she was real.

“That’s impossible – how did you two make it out of the quintessence field? You—” Allura gasped softly as her eyes locked with the third person. “M-mother?” She froze too. After all, it was like seeing the dead come back to life. I could safely assume that third person was her mother. They looked like carbon copies of each other.

Even Alfor was in shock. “Melenor…you’re—”

Melenor approached Allura, looking more disappointed than happy to see her. “That is enough, Allura. No more.”

“But mother, this is Zarkon! And he…w-what are you doing with Lotor?! They both are evil they both killed our—”

“I said, that is enough. Your father and I have taught you better than to behave so rashly. Alteans are slow to anger and rich in mercy.”

“Mother, they know nothing of mercy. I don’t understand. Why are you defending them?”

“Melenor, my love,” Alfor said, stepping between them. “I’ve always trusted your judgement, but I must admit, even I am at a loss. Is Zarkon not meant to face the repercussions of his actions?”

“I’ve never known you to be a coward or a fool, Alfor,” Melenor snapped. “Our daughter may be royalty, but you’ve allowed her to overstep a boundary and declare herself as the sole victim of Zarkon’s actions.”

“Mother…”

“I’ve seen and heard much. Daughter, I love you. But have you forgotten, ‘the one who passes judgement must recognize their own’? You have subjectively misconstrued your privilege and position in this war. It was not Zarkon who had killed me. In the time before my demise, I had transferred my power to Lotor. It was I who instigated his actions to save our people. I had done so in hopes that you two would someday meet and restore balance to our universe. But you referred to his people as ‘bloodthirsty monsters’ and deemed them unforgiveable. The Galra – they too, have suffered under unjust rule.”

Zarkon looked at Melenor in awe. “Melenor you…you gave your powers to my son?”

“Whoa…I guess Lotor was really a good guy,” Hunk said.

“But he still drained thousands of Alteans of their quintessence,” I said in Allura’s defense. “I knew what I saw, they were drained to the point of no return. You going to own up to that?”

“There was a chance of returning their vitality,” Melenor said. “You had sent him to his death without a chance at explanation. Now that Honerva’s occupied the colony, those lives are officially lost. Allura is not soley at fault. It is Voltron who must own that they are responsible for purging our universe into a never-ending war.”

“Melenor, please. She’s our daughter. Without our guidance, what else could she have done?”

“Not punish Lotor without trial. Our influence and wisdom had been blatantly ignored. If you were in her place, would you have immediately passed a sentence?”

“Well, yes but—”

“She’s right, Alfor,” Gyrgan responded. “I am speaking from experience as a leader. A trial would have sufficed.”

Blaytz put a hand on Allura’s shoulder. “But I understand Allura’s feelings. They were warranted.”

“But to hear both sides of the story…who is to say who is in the right or wrong? However, it is clear that less violence would have occurred had the princess and Voltron given the prince a fair trial,” Trigel said.

All this…we couldn’t believe what we were hearing. _We_ were the ones at fault? Voltron made a mistake? All this time, we thought leaving Lotor in the quintessence field seemed like the right choice. Even though she wanted it, we knew it was wrong to leave (Y/N). Even then, she knew. (Y/N) knew he was good.

“I can’t believe this,” Allura said. She swallowed thickly, tears forming in her eyes. “The Galra they—”

“Were acting on orders,” (Y/N) finished. “They’re not inherently evil. Why weren’t the Blades enough to prove that to you? If and when this war is over, how long do you plan on punishing them for their race? You’ve accepted Keith, Allura. Why are his people any different?”

I remember. When I came to terms with my lineage, I felt better about myself. It sounds kind of stupid, but I felt complied to help the Galra or the Blades, at least. But somehow, telling Allura was more terrifying. She treated me like a monster – to the point where I felt like one. Melenor described what I felt: undeserving of salvation, undeserving to be a Paladin of Voltron.

I couldn’t imagine what it was like for Lotor. He’d been scorned from both sides all his life. I looked at him, sighing. He was strong. To endure rejection for centuries, he’s stronger than me, that’s for sure. Even then, he continued to do good for the universe. And to hear that Allura’s _mom_ guided him well…it poured salt on a wound.

“Lotor, my son…” Zarkon stood slowly, walking forward. He also had tears in his eyes. There was a small attempt to reach for him, but Lotor’s monotone expression made him hesitate. “I am sorry for all the strife I’ve put you through. Truly, I am. I…I know it is too late to change things...Can you find it in your heart to forgive me?”

Lotor was unmoved, but (Y/N) reached for his hand. He broke at her smile and sighed. “What’s done is done. We should focus on moving forward.”

“We’re going to work with Lotor again? Just like that?” Lance grumbled.

“Well…the queen’s good of an excuse as any,” Pidge said. “I mean…we’re going to need all the help we can get.”

Hunk twiddled his fingers, bowing at Lotor repeatedly. “Uh, I know an ‘I’m sorry’ doesn’t really cut it, but we really do mean it. If there’s anything we can do—”

I groaned. “Look, we don’t have time for this. We’re wasting time. We need to figure out Honerva’s plan and get the hell out of here.”

“We already know her plan,” Lotor said. “She intended to use the Sincline so that she may pierce realities and find one of her own choosing. Thus…destroying all other realities in the process.”

Everyone flinched. For a moment it was quiet. We all seemed to be processing the fact that Honerva was _that_ cruel.

Zarkon looked to his right. In the sky was a large moon, red like the color of blood. “That moon. That is a moon of Daibazaal.”

“He’s right, that moon is not of Altea.”

“That is the source,” Allura seethed.

The Black Lion suddenly roared, sending its most powerful beam of energy toward the moon. It shattered upon impact, exploding into particles of light instead of shards of rock. The particles fell like snow, and when they fell in a specific pattern, more visions began to appear. What we saw were visions of Zarkon, Honerva and Lotor living together happily, as a family.

“No, impossible,” Allura said.

“Don’t be fooled.” Lotor scoffed. “They’re not real memories. If they were, we would not be here.”

Zarkon stared up. “They’re her deepest desires. Everything she hopes to achieve.” He wore an expression of longing. These visions are probably his too.

“Delusions of grandeur. She won’t ever have the chance,” said Lotor.

The peace was disrupted by a violent storm. Strikes of lighting came at us while heavy winds threatened to push us away.

“What’s going on?!” Lance cried.

“She knows you’re here!” said Zarkon.

Lotor and Allura shouted in pain and collapsed to the floor. While Melenor and Alfor ran to Allura, (Y/N) ran to Lotor, but it was hard to tell how to help. “My son and the princess hold the entity within. Honerva controls it now.”

We couldn’t just stand here – Honerva could kill us at any moment. I ordered everyone to get to their lions, but they disappeared. “Where did they go?”

“The Sincline and Novaturient are gone too,” (Y/N) panicked. “How is that possible?”

“You’re in her mind,” Zarkon answered. “She’s more powerful here.”

Things were getting more dangerous by the second – the storm surrounded us, trying to close us in. The ground began to shake to knock us off our feet. “What do we do?!”

“There’s nothing you can do but accept defeat.”

“No! We won’t give up!”

“That is your Galra lineage. It’s what makes you a great leader of Voltron. You and I share that trait. But look where it has led the two of us. My desire for unlimited Quintessence was the catalyst for 10,000 years of destruction. Your quest to save the universe took you into the mind of a psychopath.”

I glared at Zarkon. He may have been the previous Paladin, but there was no way we were alike in any way. “Yes, to gain the knowledge of what she’s doing. And now we know.”

“Yet you still don’t know how! She’s too powerful!”

“Zarkon, Honerva may be more powerful than each of us alone but the strength of ten Paladins working together as one is the strongest force in the universe,” Alfor said.

“The lions are gone, Alfor. Voltron is gone forever!”

In place of the moon, a giant dark orb appeared. More lighting came from it, slowly coming closer and closer to consume us. This wasn’t the worst thing we’ve faced. I knew there was still a way.

“No, Voltron isn’t gone,” I said. “Voltron is within each and every one of us. We’re bonded to it, and to each other.”

“We have one last chance to set things right, but we cannot do it without you. Ride with us one last time, Zarkon.”

Zarkon paused. He stared at Lotor for the longest time until he finally held his bayard to the sky.

“ _Form Voltron_!”

Our lions appeared again, successfully managing to combine and then summoned the blazing sword. Instead of running, we flew towards the dark orb at full speed and cut through it. However, it was only neutralized. I was so focused on the battle, I’d forgotten about the others. It was in that moment that I looked to the ground to search for them.

“My mother! Where is my mother?!” Allura shouted.

I looked left and right in a panic. (Y/N) and Lotor never appeared inside the Black Lion.

 

* * *

 

You shielded your eyes from the blinding strikes of lighting. With the clash of Voltron’s blazing sword against the barrier, the skies had turned more chaotic. Attack after attack, Voltron could not penetrate Honerva’s mind. At this rate, escape seemed impossible. Lotor seemed just as anxious as you.

“I refuse to let Zarkon be right,” Lotor said. “Even if Voltron cannot penetrate the barrier, we must find a way. We have to return to Taryn.”

Melenor’s lips slowly formed a smile. “By the ancients, my husband still plays the valiant fool. See how they struggle. Courage alone will not save us. Voltron is not indomitable. We will not treat their battles as sacrosanct.”

Lotor and you exchanged a look. “My queen?”

“They expect us to do nothing. We will not do nothing.”

Melenor turned to us, holding out her right hand to summon the Sincline. You and Lotor found yourselves seated in your designated positions. Before either you or Lotor could protest, everything around you began to glow.

“What’s going on?” you stammered.

The light around you had lifted you from your seat, positioning you and Lotor in a manner that was similar to Voltron’s transformation. The helm and controls shifted while the walls expanded around you. When the light had finally settled, you realized that the Sincline had evolved.

Lotor was now seated behind you. His breathing slowly as he tried to find his bearings. His hands grazed over the controls, eyes shifting to understand what had happened. He willed the Sincline to activate its wings and additional weaponry. It did, but no movement occurred.

You found yourself standing in the middle of the bridge. The floor beneath you was made of glass, illuminating with every step you made. You looked outside, seeing a rock hurling toward you. Instinctively, you shielded yourself, causing the Sincline to do so as well. In real time, the Sincline was in sync with your movements.

Lotor laughed aloud. “Our ship…it has been synthesized with the Novaturient!”

“Yes, this is the power I wanted to bestow,” Melenor said. She had spoken through the intercom, but her body was nowhere to be found.

“Tandem piloting,” you gasped. “The controls are evenly divided.”

“Perfect balance to defend and sustain. You must hurry. Voltron will not be able to hold out for very long.”

“Thank you, my queen.” Lotor grinned at you and nodded. 

“We’ll make you proud.” You returned his smile as your newfound pride swelled. You flexed your muscles, stimulating the quintessence in your veins.

“Right then. Let us go, my love.”

You looked to Voltron as Lotor activated thrusters, sending you toward the sky. You readied your fists, awaiting the right time to strike. Lotor easily evaded the incoming debris. With Voltron too preoccupied on escape, they did not anticipate the debris heading toward their direction.

“(Y/N), use only 40% capacity. We don’t want to expend energy to protect them.”

“Right! Got it.”

“On my signal, destroy the boulder.”

Your eyes narrowed to focus. You clenched your first to guide the quintessence into your right arm. Lotor steadily flew toward Voltron.

“20%...25%...30%...35%... _(Y/N) now_!”

You cried out, throwing your first in the center of the boulder. It immediately fell apart; the force of your attack had sent the remnants toward the barrier. The Sincline’s close proximity to Voltron had allowed for communications to take place.

“No way! It’s Lotor’s ship!” Lance exclaimed.

“But wait, look. It’s different, it’s movement is somehow more fluid,” said Pidge.

Allura gasped. “It can’t be…it’s…it’s synthesized with the Novaturient.”

“What’s a Novaturient?” Hunk asked.

“It doesn’t matter – we need to hurry before Honerva takes us out. Lotor, (Y/N),” Keith hailed. “Can we expect you to help out?”

“Yes, Black Paladin,” Lotor answered. “We must combine a strong, singular attack if we are to penetrate the barrier.”

“A swing of blazing sword and my fists at 100% capacity ought to do the trick.” You held out your hands, evenly splitting the quintessence in both of your hands.

“If we’re going to do it, we need to do it now. The orb’s getting bigger!”

“Count us off, Green Paladin,” Lotor said. “We’ll follow.”

“Okay. Mega-thrusters at full power. We attack in 15 ticks! 15…14…13…”

Lotor pulled back, giving you an adequate amount of space to ensure that the acceleration would result in the strongest impact possible. You held your hands out forward.

“7…6…5…4…”

“75%...80%...85%...90%...”

You shouted at the same time as Lance. The blazing sword and your fists broke through, resulting in your instantaneous escape. The Sincline floated in space. Looking out the window, you saw that you had returned to your last position in your reality. Central Command was just outside.

“(Y/N)? What has happened? (Y/N), do you copy?”

You groaned, pushing your fringe from your face as you rose from the glass floors. It appeared that the Sincline remained synthesized with the Novaturient. Somehow, through Altean alchemy, the synthesis transferred from Honerva’s mind to reality.

“Yes, Krolia. I copy. We’re back,” you responded. “Is Taryn all right?”

“Yes, he’s safe and sound. Was the mission successful? Did you remove Lotor’s entity?”

Lotor finally woke. He rubbed at his temple, relieved to see that the Sincline remained transformed. However, his expression turned sour when he realized that the task wasn’t exactly completed. “No, we didn’t. We met with the Paladins. It would seem the princess was unsuccessful as well.”

“I see,” Kroila sighed. “Well, at least we won’t have to be the ones to break it to the Paladins that you’ve returned.”

Lotor pulled up the monitor, revealing Kolivan and Krolia on the screen. “But we will have to let the coalition know of the Blades’ involvement,” Kolivan said. “We have orders to board the Atlas for a briefing.”

Krolia frowned and crossed her arms. “You will be there, right?”

“Is that even a question? Of course we will. We have the Sincline. We’re involved,” you said.

“But don’t be surprised if you both are put under arrest. I know it’s not ideal but Keith and I will do what we can to ensure the comfort of your family.”

You and Lotor scoffed. There was no way you’d tolerate that – not after everything you’ve been through, not after everything Honerva had done. Putting you and Lotor through another trial would make the coalition less prepared than they already were.

No.

It was clear now: you and Lotor were born for each other. Together, you were unstoppable. Even when you had fallen from grace, the ancients ensured that you rose from the ashes. Nothing could tear you asunder. Allura’s wrath would no longer stand as an issue, for even Queen Melenor intended for you to fight alongside Voltron as their equal – the sole pilots of the Sincline.

And even if the coalition would blindly imprison you, Taryn’s existence was a clear indicator that good came from the universe convening.

"There's no mystery to be solved. We know how to defeat the witch." Lotor rose, walking to your side. “The coalition cannot afford to spurn us. If they decide to imprison or execute us – do anything to prevent our involvement, then they’ve already lost the war."

You locked eyes with Krolia, nodding. "Tell Shiro. Emperor Lotor and (Y/N) Sanda will be attending the coalition briefing as potential allies." 


	35. All the Pain of Yesterday

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • Coming Home (Part II) – Skylar Grey  
> • Not About Angels – Birdy  
> • Say Anything – Ashley Nite
> 
> SURPRISE. Another chapter. Have a good weekend, folks.  
>  

You held your chin up in confidence as you walked the halls of the Atlas. You were impressed. Earth technology had come so far. Of course, you knew that they had Samuel Holt to thank for that. The faces you had passed were familiar. Old colleagues, superiors, students…some of them doubted your capabilities. Most of them thought you were dead. But you wore your reputation like armor. (Y/N) Sanda – niece of Admiral Ellen Sanda, Galaxy Garrison medical student, the Proto Project, Captain of the Galran Royal Guard, Emperor Lotor’s intended, mother to the Galra Empire’s crown prince, pilot of the Sincline. Once, you dreamed of going back home. Now, you return to your people as powerful figurehead.

It seemed everyone aboard wanted to have a glimpse of the infamous Emperor Lotor. The whispers didn’t faze him. Nor did the feeble Earthling escorts and their guns. He held no insecurities as he’d done for 10,000 years. However, if one person had even _looked_ in Taryn’s direction, he’d lose all tact.

The escorts led you, Lotor, Eylek and Groven toward the conference room, where the briefing was held. You all had anticipated that the first topic of discussion would be your and Lotor’s return. To enter and escape the quintessence field was unheard of. On top of that, you managed to escape Honevera’s grasp. Surely, they’d want to hear all about it.

You had been stopped right before the entrance. There stood Commander Holt and Colleen Holt. Unlike the escorts, they were warm and welcoming. Your gaze softened when they both ran to hug you.

“(Y/N), you have no idea how happy we are to see you,” Commander Holt greeted.

“Commander Holt…Colleen…” You sighed in relief, tears of joy welling in your eyes.

“Your parents thought of you every day, praying for your return,” Colleen said.

“I miss them so much. But I’ll see them again soon – once we set all this right and win the war.” Taryn cooed, reaching for Commander Holt’s beard. You laughed, kissing the top of his head.

“Yes, of course. Actually, he’s why we wanted to see you first before you walk in.”

“Taryn?”

“A conference room is no place for a baby. Space in general,” Colleen said. She looked to Lotor and gave him a reassuring nod. “I promise, I will keep your son safe.”

Lotor was hesitant. “I’m not sure if I—”

You held his hand, frowning. “Lotor, we can trust them. It might be best for Taryn to get a proper check-up and some food.”

His concerns were valid. He was to hand over his son to people who didn’t trust him. Only because it was you that he was swayed. He sighed and nodded in agreement. Before you handed Taryn over, Lotor made sure to kiss him goodbye.  

“I swear on my life, he will be taken care of,” she said.

“Thank you,” Lotor said.

The doors opened to reveal the Atlas crew. Despite the known fact you were alive, the room audibly gasped. Seeing you and Lotor in the flesh still surprised them. Besides the Paladins, you knew the crew well. It seemed much of the staff from the Galaxy Garrison had transferred to the Atlas. Commander Iverson, several cadets, and Officers Veronica and Curtis.

When you locked eyes with Shiro, you both knew that it took everything not to run to each other. Krolia had told you: the Shiro you had met was his clone. _This_ was your Shiro – the one you began your journey with. For you, the last you’d seen of him was fairly recent. For him, he’d last seen you at Zarkon’s feet.

 “(Y/N),” he breathed out. You could see his eyes glass over, but he quickly regained composure. “Lotor.”

“Captain Shirogane,” you said cordially. While Commander Holt took his place with the crew, the escorts motioned for you to be seated in front of the room. The placing of your seats made this look more like a trial than a briefing. You and Lotor remained firm. “It’s good to see you.”

“Yeah... _ahem_. Now, before we begin, I’m sure you both know that we need to address the elephant in the room.”

Lotor raised an eyebrow, along with the other alien races present. It was common for Shiro to use metaphors, even when aliens did not understand it. Keith jabbed Lance’s ribcage to prevent him from laughing.

“I’m assuming you are referring to my ‘death sentence’ – as so Queen Melenor so delightfully put it,” Lotor snarked.

“Don’t speak of her as if she’s _your_ mother,” Allura spat. “You know what you did.”

“Yes. So do you. Yet you refuse to acknowledge the truth or take responsibility for your wrongdoing.”

“You’re undeserving of the Novaturient!”

“That’s enough!” Shiro shouted. “You know, for royals, I expected more decorum from both of you. We didn’t come here to argue. We’re on the same side of this war. Allura, I know it’s not ideal, but we can’t deny the fact that Lotor has given us an advantage in this war by bringing the Sincline-Novaturient to us.”

You narrowed your eyes, addressing the entire room. “Just Lotor? Not me? That ship relies on tandem piloting – one of them being the Proto Project. It requires _both_ of us. I’m just as responsible for the Sincline as he is. We never agreed that we’d be _giving_ the Sincline to the Voltron Coalition. Or are we to expect that Voltron will overstep its bounds and assume control? In fact, the moment we arrived, we were treated like prisoners of war, not allies. This meeting should be considered a diplomatic affair. Actually, there’s major recompense to be given for striking the _Emperor_ of the Galra Empire.”

Everyone stilled. You were of earth, but your loyalties were clear. (Y/N) Sanda was no longer complicit simply because these were your friends. Respect was due.

“And there will be,” Shiro said. “We’re willing to grant shelter aboard the Atlas and rank in the Voltron Coalition.”

“Is that what you think is adequate recompense?” Lotor scoffed. “Do you not realize the consequence of the Paladins’ mistake? I was the _protector_ of the Galran Empire. They thought to have enacted justice but millions of lives were lost to power vacuums and bloodthirst."

Keith stepped forward. “Look, you’re right. I’m 100% positive there’s nothing the Paladins can do to make up for what we’ve done. Just because we’re the Defenders of the Universe doesn’t mean we’re always right. On behalf of the Voltron Coalition, I’d like to be the one to apologize for drawing first blood. It was wrong. We should’ve allowed to hear your side, Lotor.” Everyone was taken aback by Keith’s humility. Much more known for his stubbornness and pride, this speech was very unexpected.

“I second that,” Hunk stated. “What we did…it didn’t feel right. In the pit of my stomach, I knew we did something wrong. And not just because of (Y/N), but because of what happened after that battle. I mean three years of destruction? We could’ve avoided this whole mess with Honerva if we just stopped to listen. We’re really sorry, Lotor…”

“I don’t want an apology. I want safe passage. The Galra have been murdered, scattered. The Alteans enslaved. I am still an emperor. I have an obligation to protect what’s left of my people.”

“The Galra are my people too. Before you showed up, the Blades have been commandeering remaining Galra fleets. And as you know, much of our culture has been lost. We’ve discussed this for some time, but we’re certain of this decision. We need you to lead and unify them. Reform so that we’re not reliant on a tyrannical rule. You’re not Zarkon.”

You turned to Lotor. He closed his eyes, contemplating. You knew him well enough to know what he was thinking. It was a good opportunity. There was no reason for you to doubt the genuity of Keith’s words – he was family, and he never let you down. You recalled his distress when you told him to leave you and Lotor in the quintessence field. Keith understood his mistake – this was his way of making it up. If there was a sign that the Galra had hope, this was it.

You placed your hand over Lotor’s. “You wanted to move forward from the past. They want to as well. If…if the Blade of Marmora are willing to work with you, you shouldn’t pass this opportunity. We’ll have the means to protect them.”

“So be it. Let us discuss the conventions of our accords,” he said.

“Great. As you know, the Voltron Coalition is an intergalactic resistance force.” Shiro pulled up a holographic monitor of a map of the universe. “It has grown immensely since Voltron’s reemergence after the three-year gap. We’re in constant communication with the number of ambassadors across the galaxy. We’ve all discussed the circumstances of your return. The Paladins have given testimony what went down in Honerva’s mind. Queen Melenor’s endorsement was enough to convince them to grant you a full pardon.”

“To what crime?” asked Lotor.

“The death of the Alteans during the initial stages of your quintessence extraction research and taking (Y/N) Sanda as a captive of the Galra Empire. The coalition is willing to look past that just so long as you ally yourself and the Sincline-Novaturient.”

Instinctively, you looked to Allura, Coran and Romelle. Clearly, they weren’t too thrilled.

Lotor sat back, crossing his arms and legs. “We could go on for deca-phoebs debating the truth of those accounts, but I suppose that will suffice.”

“Anything else?”

“The protection of my son. I am speaking as a father. Should anything happen to myself or (Y/N), we would like the Blade of Marmora to rear him. Because he is of mixed blood, I fear for his survival in this universe that is so keen to judge on race.”

“Kolivan? Krolia?” asked Shiro.

“We’ll take care of the child,” Krolia stated.

“Then I have no further qualms,” said Lotor.

“Excellent. Looking forward to working with you again, Lotor.” Then, Shiro turned to you. “(Y/N), you’re the secondary pilot. What are your terms?”

 “Besides my son?” Admittedly, you were a bit torn. Both your heart and loyalties lied with Lotor and the coalition. You wanted peace for everyone, especially Taryn. Ultimately, your interests have drastically changed from the beginning of this journey. As long as you were the Proto Project, you had a duty to use your power to protect the people. “All I want is to help others. By means of healing or my powers. I want to continue doing so by Lotor’s side. While we’re granting our services, I ask that we’re given protection and the provided the necessary means to act upon the interests of the coalition.”

“Sounds reasonable enough. Consider it done. If anyone would like to further discuss the welfare of Lotor and (Y/N), please speak up.” As Shiro’s eyes scanned around the room, every individual nodded. The only person who had prolonged eye contact was Allura, who eventually begrudgingly nodded. “Let’s move forward with our plans to stop Honerva. Keith, go ahead.”

“Right. We now know why Honerva tried to retrieve the Sincline. Since it’s made out of the same comet ore as Voltron, it has the ability to pierce realities. She had planned to use the Sincline to find her version of a perfect reality.”

“Perfect reality? Does that even exist?” Romelle asked.

“She’s searching for it right now,” said Lance. “And if it exists, she’ll find it.”

Keith continued, “But thanks to Lotor and (Y/N) bringing the Sincline to us, she has no choice but to rearrange her plans. Most likely, she’s planning to attack Voltron and the Atlas to take the Sincline back. Which means, a horde of robeasts that’ll stop at nothing to tear the Atlas apart.”

“Then we’ll have to be ready,” Shiro said. “Anticipate a full-on war.”

Lotor leaned forward on the table, resting his chin atop his interlaced fingers. “We have the upper hand, but she is unpredictable. There’s no time to be idle. Her forces could even be outside now. The witch is so desperate to accomplish her goal, she even threatened to drain my son of his quintessence.”

Commander Holt frowned, sympathizing. “That’s…horrible.”

“Then we better hurry to prepare for the worst. Pidge, if Honerva manages to get a hold of the Sincline, what can we expect to happen?” asked Shiro.

“The problem is the trans-reality ore has been travelling between realities for millions of years. And it’s a naturally occurring phenomenon. What Honerva plans to do, is forcing that process to happen, which could have catastrophic side effects on this an any reality she travels through.”

 “So, what’s the plan?” asked Hunk. “Maybe we can, we can make a giant tractor beam? Sam, you can do that, right? Make a giant tractor beam? We could pull her to us and then blow her up with a star bomb! Pidge? A star bomb?”

Lance shook his head. “There is no plan, Hunk. We know what Honerva wants to do, but we can’t get to her. And even if we could, she has the ability to wormhole away.”

“Well, we still have to do something,” Keith said. “Let’s prepare for battle. We need to be ready to face Honerva.”

“We’ve been tracking a Galra fleet within our vicinity. Our intel shows they have a Zaiforge cannon. Maybe Kolivan and I can take Lotor and a small team and commandeer the ship,” Krolia suggested.  

“No. We need Lotor and (Y/N) just in case they need to pilot the Sincline. Why don’t you take Commander Lahn and try to recruit them to our side? We don’t want to fight more battles than we have to,” Keith said.

“In the meantime, Slav and I have been working on prototype upgrades for the Atlas’ weapon system. Of course, we’ll have to somehow find extra power for them,” said Commander Holt.

Slav crossed his arms and shook his head. “Always making the most amazing things in the universe, but never having enough power to run them.”

“New weapons?” Pidge asked. “I’ll give you guys a hand with that.”

“And I may now where we can get the extra power,” Coran chirped. “There’s a small Balmera in this territory.”

Hunk grinned in excitement. “All right! A little trip to a Balmera. We’ll take the Yellow Lion.”

“And Romelle. I’ve been training her on Altean customs. She’ll be quite helpful in communication with the Balmera.”

“(Y/N),” Shiro said. “I’d like to sit down with you and discuss in further detail of what the Sincline-Novaturient can do. In battle, it’d be helpful to know how the Atlas can help you.”

Keith smiled, quite relieved to see things coming along. “Good idea. Lotor and I will join you. Let’s sit down and talk. It’d be good to sync flight patterns with all three ships. Everyone, let’s stay focused on what we can accomplish.”

With that, the meeting ended. Everyone stood from their seats, conversing with their missions’ partners. Of course, you and Lotor turned to each other first. You both frowned. The coalition’s recompense was satisfactory, but you half-expected to be given at bit of a reprieve – time to settle and spend time with Taryn.

“That went well,” you whispered. “How’re you feeling?”

Lotor placed his hand on the back of your neck, pulling you forward to kiss your forehead. “My mate still worries for me,” he chuckled.  

“It’s because I worry that you’re still alive,” you said with a pout.

“How fortunate am I. We’ll give Taryn our love soon. We’re in safe hands.” As he kissed you one last time, his eyes met with Allura’s. Still weak from the mission, Lance supported her. She still had the energy to send hate with her eyes. He returned her glare and protectively squeezed your shoulder. “Although, some hands safer than others.”

“(Y/N).”

“Shiro!”

“If it’s all right, I’d like to speak with you in private.”

“Uh, sure. Lotor, you going to be okay?”

“I think I can handle Keith. Go on.”

Shiro escorted you to the Atlas’s bridge. As soon as you were behind closed doors, Shiro wrapped his arms around you. You felt your shoulder dampen from his tears, triggering you to cry as well.

“I couldn’t wait. I was so happy to see you. thought – I thought you were…”

“I know,” you said. You smiled into his shoulder. “I’m sorry I couldn’t come to you sooner…”

“‘Sooner’ is right.”

“Oh, I mean…when you were still you. Krolia told me. The Shiro I met was a clone.”

“Oh…You don’t have to worry about that. I still have those memories.”

“That’s a relief. I thought you’d have to give the ‘protective older brother’ speech over Lotor again,” you joked.

Shiro laughed. “I’ll always be giving you that speech. Honestly, I’m still a bit in shock. It was a clone but…he’d said and done everything as I would.” He pulled a chair for you, taking the seat beside it. “Aside from going berserk, of course. I’m really sorry about that.”

“Don’t worry. It wasn’t your fault. It was Honerva,” you said reassuringly, placing a hand over his.

“I was scared. I thought I killed you and your baby. I…I should’ve made a better effort to make sure you were alive. Because of me, I stranded your family—”

“ _Don’t_ ,” you pressed. “Don’t you dare go there, Shiro. Don’t blame yourself for a decision I made. I told Keith that I’d stay with Lotor.”

“I know. I keep telling myself but a part of me knew that you were still alive. And I didn’t act on it.”

“You’re the captain of the Atlas. You had to think of the rest of the universe. You couldn’t afford to put everything on hold for a gut feeling.”

“Keith did. He did everything he could to try to find you. He didn’t have the means to enter the quintessence field, but he still _tried_.” Shiro released a deep exhale and covered his mouth. He avoided your gaze, standing and facing the window. You knew he did this when he was upset.

“Shiro…? Shiro, what’s wrong?” He stifled a sob, causing you to rise and wrap your arms around him comfortingly. “Hey, hey. What’s wrong?

“…Adam,” he croaked. “Adam’s dead.”

Your eyes went wide as your chest tightened. It hurt. It hurt so much.

“He died during Sendak’s attack…he died protecting the Earth and I couldn’t be there…”

Adam’s image flashed into your mind. He was always kind – always smiling. In times of trouble, you could always count on him. Adam was nothing but a good friend to you. And to Shiro…he was the love of his life. You couldn’t fathom how _broken_ Shiro was. Adam ended their engagement and died not knowing he was still alive. Shiro had to live with that on his conscience. The guilt he bore must’ve been unbearable.

There were no words of comfort you could provide that possibly would lift his spirits. In this space, with you, he allowed himself to be vulnerable. What’s worse, he had to keep face as the captain and contain his feelings. Did he even have time to mourn? So, you let him, even for just a minute. He deserved it.

When his breathing finally stilled, you caressed his cheek. “Shiro, I’m sorry…”

“…we have to stop Honerva. I can’t…I don’t want to lose anyone anymore.”

“You won’t. We won’t.”

“Thank you, (Y/N).”

“Are you going to be okay?”

“Yeah, I’ll be fine. I’ll call in Keith and Lotor and the crew.” Shiro tried to give you the brightest smile he could. “With you and Lotor, we have a better chance to win. Let’s get to work.”

 

* * *

 

It was good to be back.

You’d forgotten what it was like to be surrounded by Earthlings. This was different than the Castle of Lions, starkly different than the Galra Empire but it felt like _home_. Everyone you’d met on your adventure was aboard this ship – everyone you adored and loved.

You easily adapted to the Atlas’s environment. Lotor did as well, thanks to Colleen Holt. She made the transition easier. Like her husband, she had a gentle heart. When Lotor had heard of her position as the Atlas’s horticulturist, he was ecstatic, even more so when he toured her menagerie. They eagerly shared tips and information. It was the first time in a while that he’d been so giddy. But of course, Lotor’s true smile had been reserved for you and Taryn.

You knew your comfort wouldn't last long. A battle was imminent. Your happiness could be snatched away - like Adam and Shiro's. Guilt weighed your heart. But you knew Adam. He wouldn't want your attention to be divided, especially not around your newborn. 

In your shared room, Taryn laid between you and Lotor. His little hand grasped Lotor’s finger. The muscles in your cheeks began to become sore from how wide and long you’ve smiled. Your thumb rubbed at Taryn’s soft cheek, lulling him to sleep.

“He’s so strong,” Lotor whispered. “Look, (Y/N). He must’ve gotten it from you.”

“No, you just don’t want to pull away,” you laughed.

“Taryn. Taryn…the strong. Taryn the brawn?”

“Taryn the sleepy. Look, he’s yawning. Oh my gosh…look at his little chin. Do you think he’ll have fangs? That’d be so cute.”

“Maybe. But based on his complexion, he looks more human, or Altean.”

“Still, he looks so much like you. Eyes, nose, ears. When he’s confused, he twitches his ears like you do.”

Lotor leaned forward to give you a long kiss. He cuddled up to you, making sure not to suffocate Taryn. His forehead pressed against yours, locking eyes and interlacing your hands together. “Will you ever tire of me thanking you?”

“For what?”

“Everything. For standing by my side, for loving me despite everything…and bearing our child.”

With your other hand, you reached for his single bang and twisted it around your finger. You grinned at him teasingly. “No. I like it when you spoil me.”

He laughed under his breath. “Two different things, love. Actually, I think you’ll tire more of that than verbal gratitude. Imagine, your room _flooded_ with Roses of Lyra to the point where you can take no step. And why should you? For I intend to shower you with my affections and claim you in every possible way I ca—” You interrupted him by smacking his face with a pillow, then stood from the bed and held up Taryn in defense. Lotor released a full laugh. “Oh, you’ll pay for that. Using our son against me? You know I’m a patient man, (Y/N). Don’t think I won’t stake my revenge at the first opportunity.”

“You can try. But I don’t plan on letting him go anytime soon.” You squealed as he engulfed you in his arms and nuzzled his face into your neck, tickling you with his breath and the graze of his fangs.

“Well, I don’t plan on letting either one of you go. Never.”


	36. Deserve More Than This

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [DoAR Playlist:](https://open.spotify.com/user/limopee/playlist/1hsBgFyfZ2oC9hVi0JbIxM?si=WyFwjl8yT22dviIm7AyXSg)  
>  • First Time (Acoustic) - Seven Lions, Dylan Matthew, SLANDER, Dabin  
> • Everything I Need - Skylar Grey  
> • Statues - The Eden Project/Leah Kelly

“Admiral Sanda is dead.”

You had almost collapsed, Lotor catching you before you could hit the ground. He had to support you completely, as you could not contain yourself on hearing the news of your aunt’s death. You throat dried. You felt a lump in your throat as you covered your mouth to fight back a cry. It was no use. A sob escaped your lips while your eyes glassed from your tears.

 _It just had to be her_ , you thought.

Ellen Sanda raised you for most of your life. She was far from gentle, and often times you resented her, but you knew she loved you. She did have your best interests at heart. She was family. You had to thank her for making you who you were – selfless and determined. In the toughest parts of your training with Lotor, you thought of her. You wanted to return to earth to show her your strength and accomplishments. There was so much you wanted to say to her.

“(Y/N), I’m sorry,” Keith whispered.

“She died fighting, (Y/N),” Shiro tried to reassure. “Even in the end, she fought back the Galra who manipulated her. She was a hero—”

“No, she wasn’t.” You hyperventilated as you looked angrily to the ground. “All the warning signs were there and she _still_ misplaced her trust in Sendak. She made a mistake and she paid greatly for it. Am…am I to blame? Did she do that because she knew I sided with the Galra?”

“No, that’s not it!” Keith exclaimed.

“(Y/N), you know that’s not true.” Lotor tried to calm you by holding you close. “Admiral Sanda knew the gravity of her mistake. She’s proud of you, (Y/N). She wanted you to know that.”

“You met with her?! When?!”

“In the Dreams of Another Reality, (Y/N).”

“You knew she died, and _you didn’t tell me_?”

“There was a time and a place, (Y/N). We were fighting for our lives in the quintessence field. Sharing news of your aunt’s death doesn’t exactly give confidence.”

You sighed in defeat. Lotor was right. The truth would’ve clouded your mind. “And my family? What about the rest of them?”

“They’re safe,” said Commander Iverson. “The Sandas are hard to perish. They’re currently seeing to the training of the cadets of the Galaxy Garrison.”

“Oh, thank god. Did you tell them about me? Where I am, what I was doing?”

Commander Iverson looked at Shiro in discomfort.

Shiro furrowed his eyebrows and answered, “They were happy to hear that you _were_ alive. But as far as they know now, you’re still in the quintessence field.”

“I’ll send a transmission to let them know you’re alive and well,” Commander Iverson said. “It may take a while for them receive it, but they’ll get it.”

“Yes, please. Thank you. I’ll record it myself. Everything that’s happened – they need to hear it from me. I need to tell them about Lotor and Taryn.”

“Is that all? Nothing left that you require from us?” Lotor asked.

“That should be all. Thank you for your cooperation. Just be on stand-by just in case Honerva shows up.” Shiro stood up, reaching to shake his hand. “(Y/N), I’m sorry. We can talk when you’re ready.” He rubbed your shoulder, knowing that it would be wise to keep distance.

When the rest of the crew exited the bridge, Lotor held your shoulders in his hands. “(Y/N), I am sorry.”

You had wished your aunt visited you instead. It was unfortunate that the Dreams of Another Reality you experienced were not given to you by choice. “You spoke with her? What did she say?”

“She’s proud of you. She always has been. Your accomplishments and victories, she had seen them all. I promised her that I’d tell you.”

That did make you feel better. At least there was some closure. You wrapped your arms around Lotor’s waist and looked up at him. “She told _you_? And she’s okay with you being with me?”

He hummed and clicked his tongue. “Initially, no. But I managed to charm my way into her approval.”

You shook your head and gave a small smile. “I guess the Sandas aren’t immune to helping the Galra.”

“Hm. It would seem so. You will have proper time to mourn, (Y/N). I promise.”

It was ironic that since Taryn’s birth, two important people in your life have passed. Adam would’ve been an overprotective uncle, and your aunt would’ve taught him valuable life lessons. You had boarded the Atlas strong, but you felt yourself becoming vulnerable. Thankfully, Lotor was there to support you and remind you of your strength. He had been making good calls. When all is said and done, there would be time to honor their lives later. You had to keep making them proud, make Taryn proud.

“Yeah, I know.” You wiped your eyes, trying to steady your breathing. “C’mon. Let’s record that transmission.”

 

* * *

 

“Ugh! What is that?! Back! I said, ‘back’!”

“Oh, my goooooosh! _It’s a dog_!” You knelt to the ground and made kissing noises, encouraging it to take a seat on your lap. You realized it was Bebe, the Holt family’s dog. “Look! Lotor, it’s a dog! Ahhhh so cute! Who’s the goodest girl? You! You are the goodest girl.”

“Why are you talking like that? That is _not_ cute,” Lotor grumbled. “(Y/N), don’t hug it.”

You snorted at Lotor, who had clumsily fallen backward in an attempt to climb a crate to escape Bebe’s kisses. “Okay…you not liking dogs actually might be a deal breaker for me.”

Lieutenant Kinkade entered the launch bay with Lieutenant Rizavi. “Wow. Wouldn’t have guessed the former Galra Emperor would be afraid of dogs.”

“Wooooooow! It’s _huge_!” Rizavi held up a camera, looking up at the Sincline in awe. “Oh! Mister Lotor.”

“Just…’Lotor’ is fine.”

“Sweeeeet. First name-basis with alien royalty,” she gushed. “Miss Sanda, if you don’t mind, we’d like to borrow your husband for an interview for our action movie.”

“It’s not an action movie!” Kinkade groaned. “Sorry about this, your highness. You must be busy.”

“We’re on recess, actually,” Lotor said. “…are you filming me?”

You laughed. Lotor was about to hit the ground running with Earthling culture. “Well, we aren’t married yet but I’m okay with that.”

“Awesoooome. Don’t worry. We’ll interview you too. We definitely have to get your powers on film. Follow us, Lotor. We want to know the ins and outs of the Galra Empire.”

“Very well. It is not often that you are able to speak with someone of the royal Galra lineage reared in the peak of war. But let us be brief. We must be ready for an attack at any given moment.” Despite being the interviewee, he led the group. Regal as ever, he took your hand and kissed it. “It will only be a moment, my love.”

“Oh man, he talks like Shakespeare! That’s gotta be the most romantic thing we’ve got on film!”

Kinkade rolled his eyes, crossing his arms as he followed. “Hey! I’m deleting the stuff on the princess and Lance, you know that, right?”

“Who cares?! We’ll get all our love angles from Miss Sanda and Lotor!”

“Lance?” you mumbled to yourself. You crossed your arms and tilted your head in thought. “C’mon, Bebe. Let’s go.”

 

* * *

 

You knocked, patiently waiting for the door to slide open. On the other side revealed Keith. He widened his eyes and gasped in surprise and widened his eyes. “(Y/N).”

“Hey, Keith. Can I come in?”

“Uh, yeah. Of course.”

“Thank you for letting me borrow Cosmo,” you said as you stepped through.

“Uh, no problem. I mean, you said Taryn was a good sleeper. Cosmo’ll do a good job at babysitting as long as he keeps sleeping.”

As always, his room was neat and tidy. You smiled to yourself, proud that he’d grown out of his messy habits. You took a seat on his desk chair, eyeing the various items on his desk. There were three picture frames. One of the team from the Castle of Lions, the second being with Krolia and Cosmo. The third photo was during his academy days, with you and Shiro standing proudly behind him.

“I love these,” you said, picking them up one by one.  

“I got them from my house. The frames, I mean. Surprised to see they were all still intact after Sendak’s attack.”

“Yeah. Aw, you were so much shorter than me, haha.”

Keith’s cheeks turned pink as he rubbed the back of his head in embarrassment. He walked to his bed, sitting on the edge and rested his elbows on his knees. “So, you take any pictures of Taryn yet?”

“You kidding? I think I’m going to run out of storage, haha. Lotor didn’t think it was impossible for him, but he managed to do it.”

He laughed a bit, then rubbed his palms together. “I’m really glad you’re back, (Y/N).”

“I’m glad to be back. Shiro told me about what you did, how you kept trying to find us.”

“I had to. You’re like family to me, (Y/N).”

“I know. I appreciate the effort.”

Keith looked to the ground. He’d worn that solemn expression since you boarded the Atlas. He had taken full responsibility for what he’d done to your family – for criminalizing Lotor and leaving you both in the quintessence field. Since you’d met him, Keith had always been sincere. You’d forgiven him, but little did he realize how much more it would take to forgive himself.

“…I’m sorry. I know what I did was wrong. But I just…I couldn’t let Lotor use you. But it didn’t matter anyway. You still got hurt because of me. I wouldn’t be surprised if you both hate me.”

“We don’t.” You reached forward to take his hand, squeezing it. “Keith, it’s okay.”

“No, it’s not—”

“What’s done is done. We don’t have the luxury of going back in time and fixing things. If we did, we’d be no different than Honerva. We’re here now. We just have to accept it and move on. Besides, you already made it up to us.”

“I did?”

“Yeah. As the leader of Voltron, your word means a lot.” You turned and took both of his hands into yours, looking at him earnestly. “You’re brave. Everyone knows that. But it takes _true_ courage to admit your mistakes. I’ve seen Lotor do it so many times but for you to do that in front of the coalition...it meant so much to us. You helped us find our place again. Thank you, Keith.”

“…you’re welcome. I meant what I said. I did a lot of thinking. I’ve become the Galra representative of Voltron, but I know nothing about them. I need Lotor’s help to unify the Galra.”

You smiled. “You’re two sides of the same coin. You’re both half-Galra. With you two together, the future looks bright.”

“And with you. I’ll keep doing what I can to help you and Lotor out. The universe needs to see you two for what you really are. Voltron’s on your side. Everyone seems to be on the same page. Everyone except...”

“…Allura.” You sighed in frustration. Her incompliance had made it difficult for everyone to move on. Lotor had thick-skin, but her hatred of the Galra had affected Keith’s self-esteem. Perhaps that’s why he had a hard time forgiving himself.

“Yeah. I…I talked to her about this briefly before. She made me a promise cooperate with Lotor if you both came back. She said she would, just as long as Lotor will. But now…I’m not so sure if she’s the one who’ll meet us halfway.”

“And what about the other Alteans? Are they on board with the coalition?”

“Well, Coran trusts Queen Melenor. So, it didn’t take long for him to come around. Romelle’s not saying anything. When the Alteans heard that Lotor was aboard, they were even more motivated to help our cause. Actually, the Paladins are kind of divided. Allura won’t accept Lotor as an ally. And since Lance’s her boyfriend, he’s been taking her side.”

“Lance?” You raised an eyebrow. “ _Lance_ is her boyfriend?”

Keith sat up, squinting his eyes at you. “….yes?”

Ah. There was a bit more to the insecurity. At least it wasn’t as serious as the topic on race. You straightened your back, staring him down and then side-eyeing him with a smirk. “And you’re okay with that?”

He rolled his eyes and ran his fingers through his hair. The blush on his cheeks grew darker as he bared his teeth. “I don’t know what you’re talking about—hey!”

You laughed, smacking his knee. “You two are _hopeless_. Honestly.”

“We’re in the middle of an intergalactic war. No one’s got time to be reading into petty things like that.”

“Which is exactly why _you’re_ hopeless. Lance’s so desperate, of course he’d cling onto the first person who’d reciprocate. I heard he’s the one you spent your last day on Earth with.”

“Oh my god. Shut-up, _please_!” he groaned. He threw his back onto the bed, grabbing the pillow to cover his face.

“Don’t think I didn’t notice the little _thing_ you two had.” You stood up and lightly kicked his shin. “You two are more obvious than me and Lotor!”

“Please, please, _please_ shut-up!”

“Okay, fine.” You forcibly pulled the pillow away and grinned down at him. “You keep focusing on yourself. I’ll take care of Allura.”

 

* * *

 

You and Keith were on your way to check on Taryn, your pleasant conversation disrupted by the beeping of his wrist device. He pulled up the screen, revealing Hunk on the monitor.

“Keith, is (Y/N) with you? You both need to get here _now_!”

“Why, what’s wrong?”

“It’s Allura and Lotor – they’re about to duke it out!”

“What?!” you gasped. “Where are you?”

“In the prison cells – where the Alteans are being kept.”

You both wasted no time and ran. From far away, you could hear Allura and Lotor’s distinct voices, aggressively interrupting one another. The prison cells consisted of one large corridor and several doors. When you stepped through, you saw Hunk standing in front of one of the cells. He had his arms crossed, looking left and right anxiously. When his eyes met yours and Keith’s, he sighed.

“What’s going on?” Keith asked.

“Shiro suggested that Lotor give a pep talk to the Alteans. But when Allura found out, that didn’t fly with her.”

“Seriously?” you groaned. “Those two were at each other’s throats during the debrief. Now they’re stuck in a room together?”

“Shiro probably wants to boost morale,” Keith said.

One of the doors slid open to also reveal the other Paladins, Shiro and Coran.

“You _sicken_ me – how dare you show your face here?! You dare still glorify yourself as their savior when you’ve done nothing but manipulate and use them?!”

“I made no such claim. You heard it yourself, princess. They found more comfort in my presence than yours. Your failure to realize your own toxicity is astounding. You do and say as you please simply because you are Alfor’s daughter. Even your own _mother_ had reprimanded you for your entitled and self-righteous behavior.”

“How dare you..! How?! How did you do it – how did you steal her powers as your own?”

“I already told you. _She_ had _chosen_ me as her successor.”

“Liar! I refuse to believe she had chosen a _Galra_ to protect them. You are all the same. Blood-thirsty, evil, disgusting—" Allura aggressively stepped forward, raising a hand to harm Lotor.

Fire swept through you. But it was not you who had grabbed at Allura’s wrist.

It was Lance.

“L-Lance,” she breathed out. Her scowl returned, trying to pull her wrist back. “Lance, let me go!”

He looked at Allura with tears in his eyes, shaking his head. “Allura, no. This isn’t like you.”

“What are you talking about? Have you all gone mad?! How can you let this Galra back into our ranks?!”

“ _Keith_ ’ _s_ Galra,” Lance cried. “Kolivan, Krolia, Axca, Ulaz and Thace. They’ve all been helping us. Not all Galra are bad.”

“Allura?” Hunk fiddled his fingers together nervously. “Lance is right. The Galra are people too. Do you know how hard it’s been on them to hear that? You say that the Galra are bad like, every meeting.”

“What? I do not.”

“Yeah, you kinda do,” Pidge mumbled.

Everyone looked to you and Keith, awkwardly looking around the room. You had heard and seen enough to know what was going on. You walked to Lotor, gently taking his hand to support him. Keith locked eyes with Allura, shaking his head. “Allura, you said—”

“I just can’t…bring myself to trust him,” she huffed.

Shiro walked forward, looking sternly at Allura. “I guess this is a good time to finally address it. Princess, we respect you – as we always have since the very beginning. Due to that fact, no one really addresses your blatant disrespect and prejudice for the Galra. They’re too afraid to speak out because they don’t want to bring about stereotypes that aren’t true.”

Allura became flustered from embarrassment. Clearly, she felt cornered. So she looked to the one person she could for comfort. “What? Coran, don’t tell me you agree with them.”

Coran sighed, “Princess…I understand your pain and frustrations more than anybody…but what everyone is saying is true. This needs to end, your racism towards the Galra. How can you expect them to be better when you won’t give them the chance to do so?”

Allura’s eyes locked with yours, then Lotor’s. Her glare did not leave, but her hostility did lessen. “He _used_ me. (Y/N), are you aware that your betrothed had insinuated that he and I were to be romantically compatible?”

You remembered that time, but that was Lotor’s petty behavior, nothing more. Her argument wasn’t worth entertaining. “Allura, _please_. You and I were friends. There was a time that everything was right – why can’t it be that way now? We can’t defeat Honerva if we’re fighting amongst ourselves.”

“I just…I don’t understand…why did it have to be _him_? The Galra took everything from me. I fought and believed so hard, I thought I was worthy enough to unite my people…and yet it turns out that I am not enough.”

“I’ve felt that way my whole life, especially after our quest to Oriande,” Lotor said. “I’ve been too Galra for the Alteans, too Altean for the Galra. I’ve spent my entire life on a tightrope. I had only shared my heart with you because I had found strength in you as an Altean. But one misunderstanding had sullied your entire opinion of me.”

“You had done that yourself,” she hissed. “What, am I supposed to change my entire view for one man?”

“Yes,” Lance said firmly. He walked away from Allura, standing by Keith and putting a hand on his shoulder. “Because it’s the right thing to do. Do you remember what we experienced in Honerva’s mind? How we shared our memories with our respective Paladins? Well, King Alfor never blamed the Galra. He even helped them escape when Daibazaal was destroyed. Not only that…Zarkon was his best friend. Even at the very end, he forgave Zarkon. So…why can’t you forgive Lotor?”

“…I can’t,” she cried.

Coran approached Allura, placing his hands on her shoulders. He looked at her with great intent and spoke softly, “Princess…your father was a man who valued the life of all others, including the Galra. You cannot turn a blind eye to them. Think of their boy – Taryn is not even a month old. Will you let thoughtless hatred make you believe that so much evil exists in a baby?”

Allura was speechless. The Paladins, Alteans, and even Coran – no one supported her. At least, not her utter detestation for an entire race. Like Lotor, she had been misguided. She wasn’t evil. You admired her selflessness and initiative. She pressed her lips together and looked to the ground. Her body shook from her conflicting emotions.

“Believe it or not, we still share sentiments, princess,” Lotor said. “We have the same goal: bring peace to the universe. We’ve failed before, but this is our chance to make things right. I’m not asking to be your friend, and I’m beyond asking for forgiveness.”

“So, what? I am to simply tolerate working alongside him until Honerva is defeated?”

“No,” Keith answered. “This intervention goes beyond the war. We’re asking you to not only respect Lotor, but the Galra entirely. We are not our mistakes. After all, someone once told me, ‘It’s not what’s in your blood, it’s who you are.’”

Allura swallowed thickly and averted her eyes. She gave a silent nod and turned her back to everyone. A few moments beat before she turned back around and opened her mouth to speak. “I apologize. I haven’t realized how exclusive I’d been with my morals, nor did I acknowledge the damaging effects my perspective would have on future generations. I suppose I can…commend my mother’s wishes.”

“Then it’s settled,” Shiro finalized. He gestured to Lotor, who had extended his hand to Allura. She stared at it for a moment, hesitantly reaching out to shake it. “Let’s get back to work. Lotor, feel free to continue conversing with the Alteans. Everyone else, to the bridge. We need to track down Honerva’s movements.”

“I’d like to rest just a bit more,” Allura mumbled.

Of course, everyone was worried for Allura’s physical state after the trip to Honerva’s mind. It made sense to be even more worried for her mental state. Shiro reluctantly allowed it, leading everyone away. Everyone except you and Lotor.

Lotor remained, taking your hand and kissing it. He nodded to Allura, whispering something before re-entering the Alteans’ cells. “ _Aven-llach_ , princess.”

Allura’s eyes widened, looking over her shoulder with a mortified gaze. When Lotor exited, she turned to look back at you with tears in her eyes.

“Allura?” you whispered.

“Aven-llach,” she repeated. “How could I have forgotten?”

You shook your head a bit, unsure of what it meant.

“It is an Altean word. One that has great cultural significance. Its rough translation means ‘peace, from my home, to yours.’ If I’d open with that statement to the Alteans they might’ve…” She wiped her tears and laughed softly. “How stupid of me. Perhaps I am the one who is not Altean.”

You ushered her to take a seat beside you. “You’re not stupid. Actually, the Ancients know how stupid we all are. Maybe Lotor should’ve started the debrief with that,” you joked, to lighten the tension.

“Even if he did, I’d still play the arrogant fool. He is Altean. He has every right to invoke that word.”

“Aven-llach and vrepit sa. Two very different sayings from two very different cultures.”

“And yet he is both of them.” Allura closed her eyes, wrought with guilt. “My mother was right. I’ve become hateful. My irrationality has made me no different than Zarkon.”

“Why does everyone insist to compare themselves to Zarkon when they’ve made a mistake?”

“Because we, as future leaders, are trying our best to make the universe better than how he left it.”

“Which is exactly what the Galra are doing,” you enunciated. “Lotor and Keith…they can’t do that if they’re constantly reminded of their race. Together, we’ve stopped Zarkon. And right now, they’re working together to ensure that the Alteans aren’t the next race to be antagonized. Let’s stop Honerva.”

She stared at the ground some more. “My father believed I was destined for greatness. And Lotor was favored by my mother. Yet, our birthrights did not precede us. You, the sole survivor of the Proto Project…how do you do it? The Galra had taken everything from us. After everything they’ve done, you found strength within them. Not your quintessence, but your conviction. How?”

No one has asked you that before. It was a founded question. You recalled your time as a servant of the empire. As you sifted through your memories, you could only think of even more reasons to sympathize with them. “Hate comes easy,” you answered. “I think it takes true strength to have compassion and understanding. Closing my heart made me weaker. That mindset is what helped me move forward. And in time, I learned that fate isn’t absolute. Realities and people are subject to change. I was lucky to meet people that also believed that. Keith, Lotor, Axca, Krolia…I wouldn’t be where I am without them.”

“I am sorry I had demonized your son,” she said quietly. “The Galra…do you think they’ll ever forgive me?”

“Of course, Allura. This coalition needs you. But it also needs Lotor. You know that the best way to restore the universe to its former glory is by working _together_. Our story isn’t over. You still represent the best of Altea. Your parents believe that. And I know _you_ believe it.”

Allura stood up. The light of determination had returned to her cerulean eyes. She extended her hand to yours, to which you happily accepted. Of course, you pulled her in for a hug.

“Aven-llach, (Y/N).”

“Vrepit sa, Allura.”  


End file.
